Do I have to share my husband with someone else in Paradise? Is it not unfair?

The Details of the Question

- If the feeling of jealousy can be removed from women in Paradise, the feeling of polygamy can also be taken from men... What is the reason for it?

The Answer

Dear Brother / Sister,

- Comments like that are completely products of wrong thinking originating from lack of knowledge.

We cannot understand the life in Paradise based on the life of this world. Just as it is not possible for a baby in the womb to understand the world so too is it impossible for us, who are in the womb of this world, to understand the hereafter, which is the realm we will go one day, and the realms in it. In this respect, it is not appropriate to make a decision based on our conditions and characteristics in the world.

There may not be any jealousy that causes evil, that is annoying, disturbing, and that takes place within the framework of unnecessary sensitivity because there is no environment to cause such jealousy in Paradise. The most important reason underlying the jealousy in the world is the possibility of one’s lover’s inclination to someone else. However, there is no environment that will lead to such a possibility in Paradise because everyone’s feelings occur in the atmosphere of love in the legitimate circle. We do not have a desire to eat a stone in this world; similarly, there will never be any selfish and lustful desire for someone who is non-mahram in Paradise.

Besides, since it is possible to be in many places at the same time in the life of Paradise, if a man or woman wishes, he/she will not leave his/her spouse even for a moment in Paradise. In that case, it will not be in question to share your spouse with someone else.

Moreover, Allah, created such beautiful examples with His mercy that we see that there is no jealousy even in this world. For example, everybody has two eyes. However, one eye is not jealous of the other eye. We can consider our other organs in the same way and we can say that Allah will arrange the life of Paradise according to the conditions of the eternal land of bliss and He will arrange us according to the characteristics of Paradise.

On the other hand, a person who believes in Allah must also believe in His justice and wisdom. Otherwise, he will fall into the position of a delusional madman who goes beyond his limits, who wants to make Allah speak according to his own wishes and desires.

- Allah is the owner of the universe, all the beings in it and all property. The property owner has the right to use his property as he wishes. An ant does not have the right to ask, “Why did Allah not create me as an elephant?” Similarly, a man has no right to say, “Why did Allah not create me as a woman?” A woman has no right to say, “Why did Allah not create me as a man?” A man has no right to complain by saying, “Why am I not equipped with organs to bear a child?” Similarly, a woman does not have the right to say, “Why did I not become like a man?” A woman falls behind men in terms of physical strength and men are behind women in terms of emotional strength such as compassion and mercy.

- We should not forget that Allah gave women a feeling of jealousy in this world on the one hand, and He allowed men to marry more than one woman - when certain conditions occur - on the other hand. However, since there will be nothing that will upset people in Paradise, women will not have the feeling of jealousy.

- We should also not forget that those who object to Allah’s decrees will be deprived of His mercy. It is necessary to take refuge in Allah and surrender to Him and say like Ibrahim Hakkı says, “Let us see what the Lord does; whatever He does, He does well” so as not to fall into such traps of Satan. God forbid, even if a person denies all the decrees of Allah because he does not like it, Allah will not abandon His decree. There can be no unjustness in this world worse than the reckless rudeness of people toward Allah who turn into meek sheep in the presence of a gendarme or a policeman. The miserable state of those who do not know Allah properly in the world and who imagine Him only at the level of imagination when they appear before him is described in a very clear style in the Quran. We regard it useful to quote the translations of some of those verses:

“If only thou couldst see when the guilty ones will bend low their heads before their Lord, (saying:) ‘Our Lord! We have seen and we have heard: Now then send us back (to the world): we will work righteousness: for we do indeed (now) believe’.” (as-Sajda, 32/12)

“And he that will be given his Record in his left hand, will say: ‘Ah! Would that my Record had not been given to me! And that I had never realized how my account (stood)! Ah! Would that (Death) had made an end of me! Of no profit to me has been my wealth! My power has perished from me!’

“(The stern command will say): ‘Seize ye him, and bind ye him, And burn ye him in the Blazing Fire. Further, make him march in a chain, whereof the length is seventy cubits! This was he that would not believe in Allah Most High. And would not encourage the feeding of the indigent! So, no friend hath he here this Day.’(al-Haaqqa, 69/25-35).

Although such troubled days await us, it does not befit a believer who believes in Allah and the Last Day to act in a spoiled way as if he has entered the grave with belief, answered the questions of the angels called Nakir-Munkar properly, has been acquitted in the court on the Day of Judgment, his book has been given from his right side, his good deeds have outweighed his bad ones, he has crossed the bridge and has started swimming in the rivers of Paradise.

“It is not fitting for a Believer, man or woman, when a matter has been decided by Allah and His Messenger to have any option about their decision: if any one disobeys Allah and His Messenger, he is indeed on a clearly wrong Path.” (al-Ahzab, 33/36)

The meaning of the verse above is clear.

O Lord! Do not leave us to ourselves; do not leave us to our own souls; do not leave us to the devils of humans and jinn; take us under Your protection! Protect and preserve us! Make us join the group of Muslims who are respectful to You and surrender to You with everything! Amin!

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