Jealousy means being jealous of other people, envying and begrudging them. People with such feelings are called “jealous”.
Jealousy is one of the fatal illnesses of ethics which cannot be cured. A jealous person grieves upon any goodness and positivity in other people’s lives, and even desires them to lose them all, begrudging them. If they do not lose them, jealous person’s grief increases. It is said that “Jealousy is such an illness of soul that no doctor can find the cure for it. Yet only Allah can help it.” For this reason, jealousy is a disgusting moral quality which invalidates and exterminates a Muslim’s good deeds.
Jews and Christians are always jealous of Muslims. As they are not on the right way and cannot benefit from Allah’s kindness, their jealousy increases when they see Muslims’ good deeds which they do for the sake of Allah. They plan various tricks and plots for Muslims. However, Muslims do not deserve these evils of them; contrarily, they wish goodness for them. Eventually, they always fall into holes which they dig up for Muslims. However, they cause great controversies and conflicts amongst believers. Exact punishment for the most of them will be given by Allah, the Supreme, on the Day of Judgment.
A jealous person is never peaceful and at rest because he wants people to lose what Allah endowed upon them. It is not jealousy but protectiveness to want people to lose what is not useful for them but harmful. Wanting a religious functionary, who uses his knowledge in order to gain prosperity, high position and to commit sins, to lose his knowledge is a feeling of protectiveness. And it is not jealousy, either, to want those, who use their wealth for harams, cruelty, to destroy Islam and to spread bid’ahs and sins, to lose their wealth but it is protectiveness of religion. If someone has got jealousy in his heart and still grieves over it and wants to get rid of it, it is not a sin. Memories and thoughts that exist in heart are not considered to be sins. It is out of one’s control for memories and thoughts to come into one’s heart. If one does not grieve over jealousy in his heart or if he is jealous because he wants to be, it is a sin and haram. If he shows his jealousy with his words and actions, it is a greater sin. It is said in a hadith: “Humans cannot get rid of three things: negative suspicion, belief in bad luck and jealousy. When you are suspicious of something, do not act accordingly. When you think there is bad luck with something, do it trusting Allah. Never hurt someone you are jealous of!”
Belief in bad luck means that something can bring on bad luck and negative suspicion means suspecting something or someone to be bad. It is understood from this hadith that having jealousy in heart is not haram. What is haram is to consent to it and to want it to continue. As it is said in Hadiqa, “Thoughts in heart are in five degrees:
1- They do not stay in heart for long and they go away; they are called “hajis”.
2- They stay in heart for a short time and they are called “hatir.”
3- They cause hesitation whether to put them into practice or and they are called “hadithu’n-nafs.”
4- They are preferred to be put into practice and they are called “Hamm.”
5- They are strongly and determinedly preferred; they are called “azm” and “jazm”.
In the Quran, feeling of jealousy and possible outcomes of it are not underestimated. It is absolutely thought-provoking that the main reason of the first murder of humankind, which occurred between Adam’s two sons (1), and of Joseph’s being thrown into the well by his brothers (2) is the feeling of jealousy. The Prophet (pbuh) states “arrogance” which caused Iblis not to prostrate before Adam, “greediness” which caused Adam to eat the fruit of the forbidden tree and “jealousy” which caused Adam’s son Cain to fight and murder his brother and also caused Joseph’s brothers to throw him into a well as three things that are the sources of all sins. Therefore, jealousy is a bad characteristic, which is condemned.
It is essential to try to get rid of them by continuing invocation, supplication and worshipping. It is a duty to be aware of its evilness, paying attention to Allah’s warnings and advice, and to try to get over this illness. Prophet Jacob’s older sons planned a trap against their little brother Joseph all together and they put it into practice. Their aim was to destroy Joseph. However, Allah chose Joseph and blessed him with prophethood and sovereignty. He made his brothers submit to him and got them under his sovereignty. Because of their jealousy of Joseph, their trap worked against them. And this is an obvious evidence of Allah’s wisdom and might.
When the order to “seek refuge with Allah from the mischief of the envious one as he practices envy” (3), which was sent down in surah al-Falaq, is taken into consideration, it is better comprehended how serious the destruction the feeling of jealousy and envy can cause to society is. It is also important that the incidents in question, that is to say, incidents told in the Quran, were experienced between brothers. That is to say, if the feeling of jealousy can cause one to murder his brother, what else can it not cause other people to do?
If we come to think of anarchy, moral corruption and cultural deterioration which are progressing in an increasing rate day by day and which turn this world into an uninhabitable place in the light of these verses, we can see the feelings of hatred and jealousy, which depend on various natural causes, between different groups of people due to various kinds of discrimination practiced by authority groups, who are directed to do so as a result of various thoughts and philosophies which came into our country from outside. To be clearer, today’s restlessness, theft, robbery and anarchy are outbursts of piled feelings of hatred, jealousy and revenge which have been formed in hearts as a result of discrimination such as reactionary-intellectual, revolutionist-bigot, progressive-retrogressive, fascist-revolutionist, Turk-non-Turk and Sunni-Shia and discriminations practiced by authority groups depending on these groupings, which have been imposed on our people for years.
Jealousy is the result of hatred and hatred is the result of anger. Therefore, behaving in a way which would decrease anger will decrease hatred and eventually will decrease jealousy as well. Jealousy means not consenting to Divine Decision. For this reason, a jealous person, first of all, risks his faith. Jealousy is an illness that kills the one who envies before the one who is envied.
It is usually jealousy that causes fights between people and conflicts and arguments between colleagues. Indeed, jealousy, as a result of excessive egoism, is the thought of “they must not have got what I have not.”
It is not jealousy to wish to have something which other people have got without wanting them to lose it. It is called longing (envy). Longing is a nice feeling. (It is explained in our other book titled “Güzel Ahlak Esasları ve Kazanma Yolları: Essentials of High Ethics and How to Earn Them”.)
Jealousy also sweeps away thawabs earned from worshipping one has practiced. A hadith says: “Avoid being jealous. Know that jealousy wipe out thawabs just like fire wipes woods out; it sweeps them away.” (4) Another hadith recorded by Ibn Majah says: “Jealousy eats up thawabs just like fire eats up woods. And charity (sadaqa) sweeps faults away just like water extinguishes fire.” Therefore, our religion expects believers to spend every moment of their lives in a way with which Allah would be pleased, as a requirement of their belief. This situation prohibits belief and jealousy to be together. The Prophet (pbuh) explains it in a hadith as follows: “An unbeliever and one who has killed him cannot come together in Hell; the fire of Hell and dust in a servant’s stomach which was swallowed on the way of Allah cannot come together; belief and jealousy cannot come together in a servant’s heart, either.” (5)
Being jealous of something/someone means, in a sense, considering Allah’s decision to be inappropriate. Whoever considers Allah’s decision to be inappropriate and does so consciously, becomes an unbeliever because he happens to deny Allah’s wisdom and justice by thinking so. This situation can lead to unbelief. For this reason, a jealous person is in conflict with Allah in five ways. These conflicts are as follows: A jealous person is angry because of the boons other people have got. He is angry with Allah’s way of sharing bounties to people. A person who is jealous of boons and bounties Allah has endowed upon other people sounds like saying to the Lord: “Why did you deliver these boons and bounties like that?” Although Allah gives freely from His bounties to anyone He likes, he wants to be stingy with Allah’s bounties. He wants to cause difficulties to the dear people of Allah upon whom He has endowed boons and bounties. By being jealous, he indeed helps Satan, who is the enemy of both him and Allah.
Avoiding jealousy means not begrudging people of their possessions, wealth, positions and prosperity. Whereas it is permissible to envy people (to desire to be like them) in religious matters, it is impermissible to be jealous of people in worldly matters. It is because jealousy causes the jealous person to backbite and try to destroy the one whom he is jealous of; thus, it causes him to be unfair and cruel. Backbiting, cruelty and unfairness cause one’s thawabs to go away. All of these result in the increase of boons and thawabs of the envied person and in the increase of damages and despair of the envious one. The situation of such people is expressed in the Quranic verse as follows: “they lose both this world and the Hereafter.” (6)
A jealous person also backbites someone whom he is jealous of and thus commits a second sin. And sometimes he attacks possessions of the person he is jealous of or even the person himself. On the Day of Judgment, thawabs of the jealous person are going to be taken away from him and given to the person whom he was jealous of, in return for hardships he gave to him. Ten folds of thawabs are given to the one who practices good deeds in the worldly life. Jealousy sweeps away nine of them, leaving only one of them back. No other sin other than unbelief can sweep away all good deeds of a Muslim.
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says:
“You are infected by the illness of the previous people. It is jealousy and hatred. It shaves. Know that when I say it shaves, I do not mean it shaves off your hair. It shaves off the religion. I swear with the One who holds my soul in His hand of power that you cannot get into Heaven unless you believe. And unless you love each other, your belief is incomplete. Shall I tell you what can help you to love each other? Spread peace (salam) among you.” (7)
In another hadith, the Prophet (pbuh) says: “Ask for your needs from the wealthy ones in secret because wealthy ones are envied.” And you will be envied, too, when others find out that your needs have been met.
Being jealous does not change Allah’s decision. Therefore, a jealous person grieves and bothers in vain because of his jealousy. Besides, he earns sins which are a burden on him. Caliph Muawiyah advised his son as follows: “Avoid jealousy because it causes more damages to you than to one whom you are jealous of.”
Again, Caliph Muawiyah said: “I can please everyone, except for the jealous one because he wants people to lose their boons. (As long as I have got what he is jealous of, I cannot please him no matter what I give to him.)”
Jealous people have never reached their desires and they have never been respected by anyone. Jealousy causes despair and shortens lifespan.
One who is envied by others is not harmed by it, neither in this world nor in the otherworld. He even benefits from it. However, a jealous person wastes his life in despair. As he sees no decrease but even increase in the boons of the one whom he is jealous of, he becomes restless. One should give presents to the one whom he is jealous of and praise him in order to get rid of jealousy. He should be modest to him and pray for the increase of his boons. (8)
The Prophet, in his Farewell Sermon, wants us to avoid jealousy, which damages feeling of brotherhood and prevents the brotherhood of Ansar-Muhajir from being spread all over the world and which blocks awareness of being Ummah, emphatically.
“(O believers!) Do not be jealous of each other, do not hate each other, do not turn your backs to each other, and do not spoil each other’s trade. O servants of Allah! Be brothers! A Muslim is the brother of other Muslims (regardless of his color, language, place of birth, social statue and gender). So they cannot be cruel to each other, cannot betray them and cannot leave their call for help unanswered and cannot insult (humiliate) them either. Allah does not care about your bodies and wealth but cares about your hearts and deeds – he said taqwa is here, taqwa is here, taqwa is here; pointing his heart - . It is enough to humiliate his Muslim brother to be regarded as a bad person. A Muslim’s blood, possessions and honor are haram to other Muslims.” (9)
How to Get Over the Illness of Jealousy
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said:
“It is impermissible to envy anyone, except for these two people: One is the wise person who makes judgments with the wisdom that Allah has given to him and who also teaches it to other people. The other is the wealthy person who spends his wealth, which Allah has given to him, on the way of Allah.” (10)
The word which we translated as “envy” in the hadith must be understood in this way: “It is permissible to desire to have what Allah has given to these two people.” It is fair to think “he has got that thing and I want that thing too.” Jealousy can be seen in all actions and feelings, even in worshipping. Its cure is to consent to the Divine Apportionment and to recite the surah of Yusuf a lot, to learn lessons through it.
The way of getting over jealousy is described as follows in another hadith:
“There are three things; nobody has ever managed to get over them: Bad luck, negative suspicion and jealousy.” When the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was asked about the way of getting over them, he said: “When you think of bad luck, do not quit the thing you like. When you are suspicious of something/someone, do not investigate. When you are jealous, do not act accordingly.”
In this sense, it is possible to get over negative suspicion and jealousy by not going after them. Hasan al-Basri says: There is nobody who has no jealousy inside. Whoever gets over it and does not become cruel going after that feeling is not jealous.
What is appropriate for a believer is to hate it and to try to send it away when he feels jealousy inside; just like what he does when he feels the urge for committing harams. Badiuzzaman gives the following advices on how to get over this feeling:
“The cure for envy: Let the envious reflect on the ultimate fate of those things that arouse his enmity. Then he will understand that the beauty, strength, rank, and wealth possessed by his rival are transient and temporary. Their benefit is slight, and the anxiety they cause is great. If it is a question of advantages enjoyed with respect to the Hereafter, they cannot be an object of envy. But if one does envy another on account of them, then he is either himself a hypocrite, wishing to destroy the goods of the Hereafter while yet in this world, or he imagines the one whom he envies to be a hypocrite, thus being unjust towards him.”
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh), who addressed all times until the Day of Judgment, who offered solutions to the problems of all eras and described our day, expresses the hardships believers today experience so clearly: “When one of you looks at someone who is superior to you in terms of wealth and disposition, he should also look at someone who is inferior to him. It is necessary to do so as not to underrate the boons Allah has endowed upon you.” (11)
In another hadith similar to this one, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says: “Spend little time with the wealthy people. Otherwise, it helps you only to underrate Allah’s boons upon you.” There is the cure of an important illness in this hadith. Actually, when one looks at someone superior to him, he cannot be sure if he is not going to be jealous. And the cure of this illness called jealousy is to look at people inferior to you. This will help you to consent to what you have got.
Another hadith that is to complete our topic is as follows:
“There are two traits; whoever has got them, Allah records him as grateful and patient. Whoever looks at people inferior to him in terms of worldly matters gives thanks to Allah for the superiority he has got. Whoever looks at people superior to him in terms of religious matters begins to follow them. Whoever looks at people superior to him in terms of worldly matters grieves over what he has not got and thus he is not recorded as grateful and patient.”
As it is stated in the hadith above, a believer should always look at people who are inferior to him in terms of worldly matters so that he can be grateful. And he should look at people who are superior to him in terms of deeds, taqwa and faith so that he can realize his flaws and can try to correct them. When we think of this situation from the reverse angle, immorality and fornication would increase; people do not hesitate to kill each other in order to gain worldly wealth and position.
It depends on a good self-discipline for one to save himself from this trap. That is to say, if one can turn the projection onto himself and grows the habit of taking care of his own flaws, he decreases this risk. It is possible to get over all these traps by finding good examples for us and by trying to be like them. It is appropriate to wish to gain knowledge and wealth in order to use them appropriately.
One should supplicate saying “O Lord! Do not let me be jealous, let me be one of whom others are jealous!” It is because a jealous one sees a kind of perfection, which he has not got, in the person he is jealous of. And that is why, he is jealous of him. Be patient with the jealousy of the jealous one. Your patience kills him.
What are the disadvantages of jealousy?
Another way of getting over jealousy is to know what it is and to know its negative effects on our worldly and otherworldly lives.
Those who are not upset by their own losses but by other people’s gains set the most extreme example of commercial ignorance. They are little poor losers writhing in jealousy.
A man of wisdom says: “Jealousy is an ambition that makes one insane. It makes him roam from place to place, instead of keeping him at home.”
When people infected with this illness evaluate the boons such as faith, knowledge and wealth, they deal with it reversely. They desire wealth and high position first. Then they desire body health and lastly, knowledge and faith. However, can a small piece of faith be compared to an extra piece of knowledge? Can a little bit of superiority in knowledge be weighed together with body health? Can body health be compared to wealth?
This is a strange mystery and a great wisdom. With this mystery, greedy and jealous people spend their time being busy with wealthy people and so they leave scholars, dervishes and righteous people alone. However, they are the ones who have got the real wealth.
Badiuzzaman offers an advice in order to get over jealousy: “Let the envious reflect on the ultimate fate of those things that arouse his enmity. Then he will understand that the beauty, strength, rank, and wealth possessed by his rival are transient and temporary.” (The Letters)
It is the foolishness of thinking that the one of whom you are jealous and the worldly boons he has got are everlasting which cause the illness of jealousy. Rationally, everyone knows that it is impossible; however, once the feelings begin to rule, the poor mind can do nothing but just writhe in helplessness.
A century later, all jealous people and all people of whom they are jealous, and their positions and wealth as well, will be taken over by other people; they will stay with them for a while and then to be taken over by other people.
A man of heart likens this world to a beautiful lady who winks at everyone but never ever marries any of them.
Jealousy also means an objection to destiny. “Or do they envy mankind for what God hath given them of his bounty?” (an-Nisa, 4:54)
Let us imagine a person: He has done his best in order to gain a certain bounty, working within the lawful limits, and has begun to wait for his Lord’s mercy and help after having practiced his actual and verbal supplications. What a believer should do when he sees that a person is endowed upon by Divine kindness is to be happy as if he was the one who was endowed. This is what belief in destiny and Islamic brotherhood requires.
Master Badiuzzaman utters a warning statement for those who prefer jealousy and enmity: “Whoever criticizes Divine Determining is striking his head against an anvil on which it will break, and whoever objects to Divine Mercy will himself be deprived of it..” (The Letters)
There is a very wise sentence: “Allah has given from his bounty” in the Quranic verse. Acting upon this sentence, commentators of the Quran has stated that it is permissible to be jealous of unlawful gains and they said that “it is not jealousy but justice to want people to lose what they gained unlawfully.”
In this sense, if one became rich by stealing, it would not be jealousy to want his wealth to be taken away from him. Jealousy is when one begrudges lawful wealth or position which “Allah has given from his bounty.” and wanting these to be taken away from a believer means to criticize destiny and to object to mercy.
Fudayl bin Iyad’s statement “A believer desires; a hypocrite envies” is both a fine criterion and a great warning for us. One can desire to have a worldly or otherworldly boon others have got; this is not jealousy but longing. Jealousy is when one wants someone to lose what he has got. That is to say, the main aim of a man who is jealous of his rich neighbor is not to be like him, but to see his neighbor poor. And this is a vile and base thought befitting hypocrites only.
However, it is, of course, wrong to label jealous people as hypocrites right away, by misinterpreting this beautiful statement.
Definition of hypocrisy is clear: “Hypocrite is someone who pretends to believe but does not believe indeed.” Is it possible to call a believer, who is jealous, a hypocrite in this sense? So, it is necessary to understand it as “Never be jealous, because it is a vile attribution for hypocrites only.”
A person who loves himself and who knows what is good for him does not prefer to be jealous because jealousy causes one to destroy his own psychology due to not begrudging others’ happiness. It is like stabbing yourself when you are angry with someone else.
“Envy in the first place consumes and destroys the envier, and its harm for the one envied is either slight or nonexistent.” (The Letters)
One should keep in mind that having a worldly boon or superiority is not evidence of his perfection. If it was so, all rich people would be righteous and all poor people would be sinful.
It is not the reality. Worldly boons are a means of testing. Everyone is tested in a way. What matters is the end of this journey. Of course, it is nice to try to be rich through lawful ways or to gain high positions. However, destiny rules over incidents. We might not be able to get what we want no matter how much we work and our rivals can beat us.
We are supposed to trust Allah and to consent to Divine Decision, after doing what we should do and say “so this must be better for me.” Otherwise, we will destroy our spiritual world and we can run the risk of objecting to destiny, being tricked by Satan.
And this has got great negative consequences, which are everlasting.
The primary mahram (a very close relative that a person cannot marry) men for a woman are as follows: Her father, father-in-law, her husband’s son from a previous marriage, her brother, her brother’s or sister’s sons, her paternal and maternal uncle, her foster brother (breastfed from the same woman)…
The evaluation of the faqihs (scholars) about the issue is as follows: The head, hair, neck, breasts, ears, wrists, arms, shins and feet of a woman are her ziynahs. There is no drawback in terms of Islam for a woman to expose them when her mahram men are present. However, it is haram for her to expose her waist, abdomen, back and legs above her kneecaps even to her mahrams. The kneecap is included. (Al Mabsut – Shamsulaimma Sarahsi)
The permission for a man to look at the ziynah parts (mentioned above) of mahram women is valid for her permanent mahrams not for temporary mahrams. Therefore, it is haram for a man to look at the ziynah parts of his wife’s sister; and it is haram for his wife’s sister to expose those parts when he is present. It is because they are mahram temporarily. That is the sahih (sound) opinion. (Fatawayi Qadihan – Al Muhit – Radiyuddin Sarahsi)
A man is allowed to look at the ziynah parts of mahram women if he does not look at them lasciviously. If he feels lust when he looks at them, then it becomes haram for him to look at them. The same decree is valid for touching those places.
It is haram for a man both to look at and to touch the back, waist, abdomen, sides, and legs above the knees including knees of mahram women whether she is her mother, sister or any other close relative except when it is absolutely necessary. (Al Muhit – Radiyuddin Sarahsi – Fatawayi Hindiyya)
The son of a woman is allowed to rub her above-mentioned places over a dress when it is necessary because he is the closest person to his mother.
3-)
Nikah
Doing nikah twice with same girl is not problem, it can be done, but according to the Shafii sect it is not religiously allowed for a woman to marry without the permission of the parents. But according to Hanefi, a woman who is in her adolescence can marry without the permission of her parents. It is not compulsory for a woman in Hanefi sect to get permission for marrying, but it is better to have it. At least, she is supposed to try to have their consent. Their marriage is valid without the permission. She doesn’t become a sinner because of that.
A man doesn’t have to have the permission from his parents for marriage. But the consent of the family is an important issue. It is better when he gains their consent. But when he marries without permission, he doesn’t become a sinner. Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?
According to the Islamic laws, there are some conditions for the validity of the marriage. One of the conditions is that the couple should have the consent of the woman’s parent. This rule is accepted by three sects except Hanefi. The permission of the parents for the marriage is a “rukn” and condition for Hanbeli. According to all three sects, the marriage done without the permission of woman’s parents is invalid.
According to the sect Hanefi, the girls who didn’t reach adolescence, who are very immature that they can’t live on their own and those who are senile can’t marry without permission. People apart from those can marry without permissions of their parents, because, the word of the woman is binding in the marriage.
This is a rule of fiqh but, it is an Islamic tradition and family customs, it is the best decision to have the permission of the parents. Normally, people take permission of parents in marriage; they are first consulted and talked apart from some exceptions. When they have the opinion and the consent of the girl, they begin preparations for the marriage.
According to the three sects out of Hanefi, the parents, which are rukn of the marriage, are in a position of “compelling parents”. In order; father, grandfather, mom-dad, brother become “compelling parents”. Actually these people can make a virgin girl marry without the permission of her.
This rule may seem absolute, but it has some exceptions and conditions. For example, when these five conditions occur, a woman can marry without permission on her own decisions. These conditions are:
1-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the parents of the men.
2-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the men.
3-When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mihr” (livelihood)
4- When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mehri misil” (similar to mihr)
5-When the man is blind or very old.
In such situations, even if the parents use their authority, the marriage can’t be valid. Because it is clear that the woman will be in a difficult position, that she will have unrest and bad times. The main aim of the marriage is living in happiness and the family’s being the house of bliss.
According to the sect of Shafii, when a man wishes to marry a woman and the girl accepts but the parent objects to it and tries to hinder the marriage, they will be responsible and loses their position of parenthood. And again a proper man wishes to marry a woman but the father demands a very high “başlık” (money paid by the bridegroom to the bride’s family) as it happens in eastern parts of our country, he cant be compelling parent, his parenthood is ignored. The permission of him is not necessary anymore. If possible, people help them marry. If the parent tries to hinder it he gets into a great responsibility. These bad events happen in places where “başlık” is common and parents bring about some sins and unrest by using their position of parenthood.
It depends on the sect that the permission of parents is included in the conditions of the marriage. But it is important in the respect of traditions and family’s own conditions. Sometimes a woman marries a man and can’t see some facts and can’t think clearly because she is inexperienced, she insists on marrying an improper man. But some time later, she realizes that her husband is improper for her and a continuous unrest begins to occur.
In such situations, the permission of the parents is an Islamic necessity and is suitable for respect to elders. But sometimes, as we mentioned above, the man and the woman who want to marry may be in harmony in respect of interest, idea and character. And the father objects to the marriage by having some prejudices about the man, in this situation it will be better to ignore him. According to the sect Hanefi the marriage is valid, so no need to have permission of him.
1. Hukuk-i islâmiye ve Istılâhat-ı Fıkhiyye Kamusu, 2: 55-8.
2. el-Ümm, 5: 20; Şafiî ilmihali, s. 443.
4-)
Is it religiously allowed to marry without the permission of Parents?
According to the Islamic laws, there are some conditions for the validity of the marriage. One of the conditions is that the couple should have the consent of the woman’s parent. This rule is accepted by three sects except Hanefi. The permission of the parents for the marriage is a “rukn” and condition (şart) for Hanbeli. According to all three sects, the marriage done without the permission of woman’s parents is invalid.
According to the sect Hanefi, the girls who didn’t reach adolescence, who are very immature that they can’t live on their own and those who are senile can’t marry without permission. People apart from those can marry without permissions of their parents, because, the word of the woman is binding in the marriage.
This is a rule of fiqh but, it is an Islamic tradition and family customs, it is the best decision to have the permission of the parents. Normally, people take permission of parents in marriage; they are first consulted and talked apart from some exceptions. When they have the opinion and the consent of the girl, they begin preparations for the marriage.
According to the three sects except Hanefi, the parents, which are rukn of the marriage, are in a position of “compelling parents”. In order; father, grandfather, mom-dad, brother become “compelling parents”. Actually these people can make a virgin girl marry without the permission of her.
This rule may seem absolute, but it has some exceptions and conditions. For example, when these five conditions occur, a woman can marry without permission on her own decisions. These conditions are:
1-When there is any kind of enmity between the parents of men and woman.
2-When there is any kind of enmity between the woman and the men' s ancestors
3-When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mihr” (livelihood)
4- When the man is so poor that he can’t give “mehri misil” (similar to mihr)
5-When the man is blind or very old.
In such situations, even if the parents use their authority, the marriage can’t be valid. Because it is clear that the woman will be in a difficult position, that she will have unrest and bad times. The main aim of the marriage is living in happiness and the family’s being the house of bliss.
According to the sect of Shafii, when a man wishes to marry a woman and the girl accepts but the parent objects to it and tries to hinder the marriage, they will be responsible and loses their position of parenthood. And again a proper man wishes to marry a woman but the father demands a very high “başlık” (money paid by the bridegroom to the bride’s family) as it happens in eastern parts of our country, he cant be compelling parent, his parenthood is ignored. The permission of him is not necessary anymore. If possible, people help them marry. If the parent tries to hinder it he gets into a great responsibility. These bad events happen in places where “başlık” is common and parents bring about some sins and unrest by using their position of parenthood.
It depends on the sect that the permission of parents is included in the conditions of the marriage. But it is important in the respect of traditions and family’s own conditions. Sometimes a woman marries a man and can’t see some facts and can’t think clearly because she is inexperienced, she insists on marrying an improper man. But some time later, she realizes that her husband is improper for her and a continuous unrest begins to occur.
In such situations, the permission of the parents is an Islamic necessity and is suitable for respect to elders. But sometimes, as we mentioned above, the man and the woman who want to marry may be in harmony in respect of interest, idea and character. And the father objects to the marriage by having some prejudices about the man, in this situation it will be better to ignore him. According to the sect Hanefi the marriage is valid, so no need to have permission of him.
1. Hukuk-i islâmiye ve Istılâhat-ı Fıkhiyye Kamusu, 2: 55-8.
2. el-Ümm, 5: 20; Şafiî ilmihali, s. 443.
5-)
Could you give information on stinginess?
In this article, we are going to try to explain stinginess and characteristics of stinginess rather than stingy people.
1. Definition of Stinginess
a) Literally, the word “stingy” means “miserly, who does not want to spend his money whatsoever, mean, parsimonious. (1) It is expressed with the words “bukhl” and “shuh” in the Quran and sunnah generally. (2) A stingy person is called “bakhil”. A bakhil likes keeping his money and gives it only when he is asked. The opposite of stinginess is generousness. A generous person gives money without being asked first and likes giving it.
b) As a term, stinginess means “Refraining from spending something which is supposed to be spent and refraining from giving freely to someone else because of excessive love for money and property.” According to Ghazali, stinginess is to keep property or money endowed upon one by Allah, refraining from spending it on the reason of creation; wastefulness is using something for a reason except the reason of creation, and it is generousness to use and spend something in accordance with the reason of creation. (3)
2. Notion of Stinginess in the Quran
The word “bukhl” is used in three verses related to stinginess and verbs derived from this word are used other nine verses in the Quran. (4) Also, the word “shuh” is used in three verses and the word “ashihhah” which means stinginess is used in one verse. We also see that words “qatr” and “man” are used in some verses to mean stinginess in the Quran. The word “qatur” means “stingy, mean” in English. It is used in the Quran as the opposite of wastefulness which means spending everything wastefully. And the word “man” is used in verb form as “yamnauna” in a verse, as “manu” in another and as “manna” in two other verses. (5)
About the situation of unbelievers who deny the truth, the Quran generally says: “Those who (want but) to be seen (of men), but refuse (to supply) (even) neighborly needs.” (al-Maun, 107:6-7). That is to say; in addition to being very stingy, they prevent others from giving freely too. Now, we would like to analyze the notion of stinginess in the light of the Quranic verses here:
- Stinginess means saving money and property and not using them to help others. Stinginess, in the Quran, means saving property and money endowed upon one by Allah and not using them for help as Allah orders us to.
“Woe to every (kind of) scandal-monger and backbiter, who pileth up wealth and layeth it by.” (al-Humazah, 104:1-2).
“And there are those who bury gold and silver and spend it not in the way of God: announce unto them a most grievous penalty.” (at-Tawbah, 9:34)
One of the main essentials of the Quran is justice. Money, gold and silver are not supposed to be saved and piled up but to be delivered to the public and used. If these assets circulate amongst people they are beneficial. If these assets are kept by certain people, only a few people can benefit from them and a large part of the society is left poor and hungry. And this is against the justice of Allah. Everybody has got the right to benefit from boons created by Allah. The disease of stinginess one has got hinders available boons to be spent for the poor and needy.
-Human beings are stingy.
“Truly man was created very impatient; fretful when evil touches him; and niggardly when good reaches him.” (al-Ma’arijj, 70:19-21).
“Men's souls are swayed by greed.” (They are inclined to be stingy by nature). (an-Nisa, 4:128)
Allah the Glorious states in these verses that stinginess is a feeling that stems from one’s creation/nature and that this feeling was placed in their nature by Him. However, one should use this feeling in a positive way. If this feeling controls one’s all actions, it hinders him from doing good things. (6) Stinginess was placed in human beings’ nature in order to test them and for various reasons. One advances and develops by fighting against it. The religion of Islam emerged in order to earn a second nature.
- Satan directs people to stinginess by frightening them with poverty.
“The Evil One threatens you with poverty and bids you to conduct unseemly. God promiseth you His forgiveness and bounties. And God careth for all and He knoweth all things.” (al-Baqarah, 2:268)
Charity and alms given freely from one’s property does not decrease the amount of the property, but makes it even more abundant because alms-giving purifies property from non-physical dirtiness and makes it halal and clean. That pessimistic Satan, who has lost his hopes of Allah’s mercy, instills hopelessness in people secretly or illicitly, directs people to stinginess, to niggardliness by spreading around false and deceptive ideas and feelings. He encourages people to spend their money/property on evil, nonsensical things and sins. However, Allah guarantees people’s eternal happiness by forgiving their sins because of alms and charities they have given, and by endowing upon them thawabs and benefits in return for their charity, both in the worldly life and in the otherworldly life. (7)
- A stingy person thinks that his property will make him eternal. “He thinketh that his wealth will render him immortal.” (al-Humazah, 104:3) Man tries to save money ambitiously, due to his love for property. Moreover, he thinks that the money he has saved will give him the power to do anything he wants. Therefore, he never thinks of death, thinking that death will not come for him and he will stay alive forever because of his property. However, property, money and fortune are all temporary. When the time of death comes for him and when his soul leaves his body, all the property and money he has saved ambitiously so far will be left behind and if he did not use them on the way of Allah, he would not be able to save himself from the wrath of hellfire.
- Stinginess is a selfish passion of the soul. This passion prevents one from spending his money freely on the way of Allah and prevents people from being purified. This feeling prevents people from using their assets on the way of Allah. Thus, if one cannot defeat this selfish feeling and stinginess in his lower-self, it is impossible for him to purify his lower-self because true salvation is possible when one purifies his soul from evil desires. (8) The following Quranic verse expresses this selfish feeling in people’s lower-selves in a very astonishing way:
“Say (unto them): If ye possessed the treasures of the mercy of my Lord, ye would surely hold them back for fear of spending, for man was ever grudging.” (al-Isra, 17:100)
It is not stinginess to give freely as alms and charity from property which Allah has endowed on people. One who does not give alms and charity from their property is stingy.
- One who protects himself from selfish ambitions finds happiness and success. One can be a good and decent person only by spending bounties, which Allah endowed upon him, generously for others. Actually, Allah says: “By no means shall ye attain righteousness unless ye give (freely) of that which ye love; and whatever ye give, of a truth God knoweth it well.” (Aal-i Imran, 3:92). A greedy stingy person, who always wants to take and never to give, cannot be expected to be useful for others. One who is protected from lower-self’s selfish passions has overcome this obstacle in front of the good and has begun to run towards the good and give abundantly from his property. This is what the true salvation is. (9)
- Believers are not stingy. Characteristics of believers are mentioned in various places in the Quran. One of these characteristics of believers told in the Quran is that they are not stingy and that when they spend, they do it moderately. This is expressed in the 67th verse of surah al-Furqan as follows:
“Those who, when they spend, are not extravagant and not niggardly, but hold a just (balance) between those (extremes).” Truebelievers should not be stingy.
- Wrath awaits those who are stingy and who bids others to be stingy. Allah the Glorious always warns human beings in different verses with different styles in order to protect people from this disease called stinginess.
“(Nor) those who are niggardly or enjoin niggardliness on others, or hide the bounties which God hath bestowed on them; for We have prepared, for those who resist Faith, a punishment that steeps them in contempt” (an-Nisa, 4:37)
“On the Day when heat will be produced out of that (wealth) in the fire of Hell, and with it will be branded their foreheads, their flanks, and their backs, their flanks, and their backs.- "This is the (treasure) which ye buried for yourselves: taste ye, then, the (treasures) ye buried!"” (at-Tawbah, 9:35)
The Quran often suggests people to get rid of this selfish feeling and develop the feeling of generousness instead of it and do good deeds in every possibility.
“And let not those who covetously withhold of the gifts which God Hath given them of His Grace, think that it is good for them: Nay, it will be the worse for them: soon shall the things which they covetously withheld be tied to their necks Like a twisted collar, on the Day of Judgment. To God belongs the heritage of the heavens and the earth; and God is well-acquainted with all that ye do.” (Aal-i Imran, 3:180)
In this verse, Allah criticizes those who do not use their money for the sake of Allah, fearing that it will decrease, and states that it is wrong of them to think that this is good for them and that it is not good for them at all. All the property they have saved and have not spent for Allah will be hanged around their necks in the form of a fire-collar on the Day of Judgment. Allah the Supreme calls them to give up stinginess, by threatening them with this terrible wrath. Actually, man comes to this world, having nothing. Allah, with His great generousness, endows upon them property and enriches them. And eventually, when Allah wants them to help others with the property which He gave to them, they refuse to help, forgetting that it was all given to them by Allah, and claiming that they are the real owners of them. However, it is necessary to use not only the property, but also all kinds of boons such as abilities, skills and knowledge, which Allah endowed upon us helping the way of Allah.
They think that their property will decrease if they give alms and charity from them and that it is better for them to save their money instead of using it for helping others. However, it is bad for them to do so. One day they will depart from this world and all the money they have saved will be left behind. The true owner of all property is only Allah the Supreme. On the Day of Judgment, one will find with him only the property which he spent for helping others. That is what will be useful to him. (10)
3. The Result of Stinginess
In fact, feelings which Allah the Glorious has placed in humankind’s disposition are not evil by themselves. What is evil is to make improper use of them. If the feeling of stinginess is used for not giving any from boons which Allah has endowed on one, with the passion for saving money for the worldly life, and thus hindering social aid, it is wrong and impropriety. Actually, Islam which prohibits wastefulness also prohibits stinginess.
Allah the Glorious states: “Who hoard their wealth and enjoin avarice on others, and hide that which Allah hath bestowed upon them of His bounty. For disbelievers We prepare a shameful doom.” (an-Nisa, 4:37)
Stingy people think that bounties which Allah has endowed generously are only for them and do not admit that poor people have got the right for a share from them. Those who do not know that property and treasures are means of testing direct others to be stingy too. Actually, this reality is expressed in the following verse as follows:
“Say (unto them): If ye possessed the treasures of the mercy of my Lord, ye would surely hold them back for fear of spending, for man was ever grudging.” (al-Isra, 17:100)
Those who have not failed to give the shares of the poor people from their property are blissful personalities. Allah’s bounties are different for every person. “One should give alms from the bounties endowed upon him, as if he were a trustee and a servant.”
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says: “Refrain from stinginess because stinginess destroyed those who lived before you and tempted them to shed each other’s blood and to consider harams to be halal…” (Muslim, Birr 56) Once, the Prophet said to his companions: “Shall I tell you the people of Hell?” The companions said: “Yes, o the Messenger of Allah!” The Prophet said: “They are those who are rude, stingy and arrogant.” (Bukhari, Adab 61; Ayman 9). Stinginess is one of the roads that lead to the wrath of Hell. Therefore, believing people should seriously avoid stinginess.
4. Reasons of Stinginess
It is possible to categorize factors resulting in stinginess under two titles:
a) Excessive love for property holdings and ambition of saving money: The leading reason of stinginess, which is one of the negative ways of human beings, is excessive love for property holdings and ambition of saving money because the desire for richness and ambition for saving money are present in humankind’s disposition. For this reason, they always work for this world and save money. As a matter of fact, the verse, which says, “And lo! In the love of wealth he is violent” (al-Adiyat, 100:8) points out to this aspect of the humankind.
As it is stated in this verse, there is so much love for richness and so much ambition for saving money in human beings’ heart that they always care for themselves only. And they care about others so little or not at all. Even if they had everything in the world and even if the treasures of Allah’s mercy belonged to them, they would still hesitate to use them for helping others fearing that they would decrease in amount. In their narrow hearts do reasons form which enchain their hands with cuffs of stinginess.
As a matter of fact, the Prophet (pbuh) puts into words humankind’s love and ambition for richness in a nice way and states that this love and ambition will end with death only, by saying “If humankind had two valleys full of property, he would desire for the third valley. Only earth (death, being buried) can satisfy him. Allah accepts the repentance of those who repent.” (Muslim, Zakat 116).
Islam explains to people that their excessive love for richness will lead them to their own destruction, in nice and persuasive ways. If one thinks of the end of property, he will understand that it is better for him to be generous. In fact, one has got no other possessions on the earth than what he eats up, he wears and what he spends for the sake of Allah and saves for his otherworldly life. It is really astonishing that one struggles with all his power for saving money and property which he will leave to his inheritors in the end and receives Allah’s wrath for this reason. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) explained this reality as follows:
One day, the Prophet asked: “Which one of you loves his inheritors’ property more than his own?” The Companions answered: “O the Messenger of Allah! All of us love our own property more than those of our inheritors.” Upon this, the Messenger of Allah said: “The true property of one is what he has sacrificed for the sake of Allah all his life. And what he has saved and put aside instead of spending is the property of his inheritors.” (Bukhari, Riqaq 12)
b) Greed and thinking of children’s future: There is a feeling in the humankind’s disposition as if they would live forever. However, man is mortal. As it is impossible for them to live forever, they try to satisfy this feeling by having children who will continue their lineage. This is one of the reasons of sexual intercourse. Parents having children prefer to save their property to spending them, with the aim of providing their children with enough livelihood and a nice future. Therefore, they behave stingily.
Saving the bounties stingily which Allah has endowed upon us rather than spending them means turning those bounties that are for us to against us. Hawla binti Hakim reports: “One day, the Messenger of Allah hugged one of his grandchildren and said:
“You are those for the sake of whom stinginess, frightfulness and ignorance exist. You are one of the nice bounties that Allah has endowed upon people.” (11) If one’s children cause one to be frightful, stingy and heedless, he is doubtlessly disappointed. And whoever respects the law of the Lord and the rights of His servants above all, he is saved. Actually, being stingy in order to realize domestic rights and piling up possessions does not prevent poverty; it does not guarantee richness, either.
It is nice that a Muslim thinks of meeting the needs of the generation that he will leave behind in order to protect them. Actually, people generally try to hand down property to their children so that they can endure troubles and problems that can occur after they die. In fact, this is a good will. It is expressed in a hadith as follows:
“It is better that you leave your inheritors rich enough than you leave them so poor that they will need others’ help.” (Ahmad bin Hanbal, Musnad, 1/172). However, guaranteeing children’s future and leaving them a comfortable life should not be done by making concessions on religion and ethics. It should not sound so reasonable that one hands down property to his children by being stingy and sacrificing his soul, generousness and Allah’s pleasure.
Islam considers one’s property and children a means of testing just like other boons and bounties. If one behaves lazily and avoids doing the necessary things and sacrificing, all these boons and bounties turn out to be troubles and even the greatest enemies for him. Islam orders people to be good to their own selves first, and then to his families, then to relatives and finally to all other people.
Being good to oneself: Meeting your needs in halal ways, protecting yourself from harams, avoiding behaviors which will humiliate yourself in front of people and protecting yourself from the kind of poverty which puts Muslims in a situation which does not fit Muslim dignity. And this is possible only through a moderate lifestyle which excludes cruelty and wastefulness. A Muslim can keep property which will allow him to reach his lawful goal. If he cannot have it, he is considered poor.
5. Disadvantages of Stinginess
While generousness is praised in Islam, stinginess is excoriated. One should refrain from stinginess to the utmost degree because stinginess is one of the reasons which destroyed previous civilizations. As a matter of fact, stinginess led them to shed blood and consider harams to be halal, as it is stated in the hadith.
“There are two characteristics which cannot exist in a believer. They are stinginess and low ethics.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd 8)
This characteristic can be likened to selfishness that is the source of many evils. Actually, a selfish person spoils many social relationships by using all opportunities, whether be material or spiritual, to satisfy his caprices. He breaks off social links. For instance, it prevents visiting relatives, caring for friends and relatives, giving gifts to each other and helping the needy people.
Stinginess causes unhappiness. The public criticizes stingy people and a stingy person cannot receive respect from people. Shortly, stinginess is a disease that prevents all kinds of good deeds and charities; because charities can be done giving the boons, which Allah has endowed upon one in various ways, generously to needy people. And stinginess prevents one from giving freely to other people for the sake of Allah.
Stinginess has got many disadvantages related both to individuals and to society. Stinginess neither allows the possessor of property to benefit from it nor the society to benefit from it, by encaging the property. So, stinginess causes many significant problems in society and in finance. Keeping property because of stinginess causes financial crisis. It causes the ethics to degenerate and hearts to become seditious. (12)
6. Ways to Escape Stinginess
Islamic scholars consider stinginess a disease of the heart and state that this disease can be cured only with knowledge and practice. Service to God is the job of earning a secondary disposition by putting Islam’s orders into practice. One can escape stinginess by being generous. One should believe that boons come only if Allah endows them and one should learn to be generous and get accustomed to be generous by supplicating beginning from the childhood.
a) Treatment through knowledge: It is possible to get over the disease of stinginess only by learning its harms related to ethics, religion and social aspects and the ways of getting rid of it. A person who knows dangers of stinginess refrains from it. For instance, would a person who knows how dangerous a snake is play with it? Would he let that snake sleep with him in his bed? Similarly, a person who knows how dangerous stinginess is quits this negative characteristic.
b) Treatment through practice: This treatment is possible by dealing with people’s problems. The Prophet (pbuh) said in one of his hadiths: “Whoever does not share the problems of believers is not one of us.” (Suyuti, al-Jamiu’s-Saghir, 2/164). Therefore, we should care about people’s problems in the society that we are a part of. Although we may find it difficult, we have to help the poor and needy people in our society. If we get ourselves accustomed to generousness and save ourselves from stinginess, we can help the poor and needy people in our society.
There are the rich and the poor in every society. They should help each other; especially the rich should help the poor. If the rich are stingy and the poor are impatient, the balance and orderliness of the society will decline. Theft, extortion, conflicts and shedding blood will start in the society; as it has been seen in all stages of history. And this will result in the destruction of that society. People will start shedding blood and considering harams to be halal. The larger the gap between the poor and the rich grows, the more we see unfairness and cruelty in the society and all kinds of injustice start to spread over in the society. Increase and spread of injustice is considered an indication of proximity of destruction. In this sense, stinginess is one of the reasons of injustice. We can say that this is the reason why stinginess is mentioned together with injustice.
In a hadith, the Prophet explains the way of getting over stinginess as follows:
“One who gives zakat, who entertains his guests and who helps others in time of calamities is saved from stinginess.” (Bukhari, Mazalim 8)
Ibn Muzir reported that Hazrat Ali had said: “Whoever gives zakat for his property is saved from stinginess.” (13) Actually, people are often ordered to give zakat both in Quran and hadiths in order to prevent the ambition for saving money that exists in human disposition from turning into stinginess. For this reason, one of the ways to escape stinginess is, for those who can afford, to give zakat for their property.
Ghazali states the following about the cure of stinginess:
“One of the ways to get rid of stinginess, fear of poverty and greed is to think about the situation of stingy people and think that everybody hates them. Even a stingy person does not like other stingy people. There is not a stingy person who likes stingy people. If a stingy person thinks about it, he will understand that he is considered gloomy and terrible, and is disliked by other people, like other stingy people, too.” (14)
Moreover, it is possible to get over the psychological disease of stinginess by thinking about the aim of gaining property. As a matter of fact, property is for meeting needs. After taking the amount of what we need, we should spend the rest for saving our otherworldly life. If a believer can comprehend that it is better to spend for otherworldly life than keeping property, the desire for spending on the way of Allah will predominate in his heart. (15)
Remembering death often, thinking about friends or relatives who tired themselves to death while struggling for saving money and gaining property and that all they had were in vain after their death can help people quit stinginess, too.
Allah the Glorious teaches us how we can compensate for our shortcomings and weaknesses via His attributes and how we can reach the sublime ones and wants us to develop our characters in accordance with divine ethics. Allah has got beautiful names and attributes, one of which is generousness. That is to say, Allah is generous and likes those who are generous. So, if people follow this attribute of Allah and become generous, they are thus saved from stinginess which Allah dislikes and also please Allah. Actually, Ghazali states that the cure of stinginess is possible by doing the opposite of stinginess that is generousness; that is to say, spending property on the way of Allah. (16)
In addition to all of these, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) suggests supplication in order to get rid of stinginess. In a hadith, he says: “I seek refuge with You from frightfulness and stinginess.” In another hadith, he says: “Every morning, two angels come down from the skies. One of them supplicates by saying ‘O Allah, may You make the property of those who help others with their own property abundant’ and the other one curses by saying ‘Destroy the property of stingy ones who keep their property.’” (17) The Prophet (pbuh) encourages people to break their habit of stinginess by helping others financially, with this hadith.
Human beings were created as stingy and impatient. That means these traits come from their disposition. Moreover, they have got both negative traits such as hatred, grudge and enmity and positive traits such as love, affection and kindness. Each of these is a corridor leading to either good or evil. In this sense, human beings should close the doors opening to evils and control their negative feelings and passions with the help of religious thoughts and feelings, which is called in religion “secondary disposition.” One should develop this disposition so that he can comprehend the perfection that is destined for him, that is, he can turn his disposition, which can turn into anything, to be something good, that is, into a believer.
FOOTNOTES 1. Olgun, İbrahim; Dravşan, Cemşit, Türkçe Farsça Sözlük, İran 1350, p. 40; Şükün, Ziya, Farsça Türkçe Lügat, (Ferhengi Ziya), M.E.B., İst, 1984, I, 659.
2. Raghib al-Isfahani, Mufradat, Beirut 1992, p. 109; 446; Ibn Manzur, Lisanu’l-Arab, Beirut 1990, II, 496; XI, 47.
3. Ghazali, Ihyau Ulumiddin, Beirut, nd., III, 63.
4. Çağrıcı, Mustafa, “Cimrilik Mad.”, T.D.V.İ. Ans, İst, 1993, VIII, 4.
5. See, al-Maun, 107/6-7; al-Ma’ârijj, 70/21; Qaf, 50/25; al-Qalam, 68/12.
6. Qurtubî, al-Jamiu Liahkami’l-Qur’an, V, 406.
7. Yazır, Hak Dini, Kur’ân Dili, II, 203.
8. See, ash-Shams, 91/9.
9. Sayyid Qutb, Fi Zilali’l-Qur’ân, XIV, 385.
10. Sayyid Qutb, ibid., II, 582,583.
11. Canan, İbrahim, Hadis Ansiklopedisi, (Kütüb-i Sitte), Akçağ Yay., İst, trs., XVII, 487.
12. Sayyid Qutb, ibid., X, 565.
13. Suyuti, ad-Durru’l-Mansur, Beirut, trs.VIII, 110.
14. Ghazali, ibid., III, 578.
15. Ateş, Süleyman, İslâm Tasavvufu, p.323.
16. Ghazali, ibid., III, 578.
17. Bukhari, Zakat 27.
(Prof. Dr. Mehmet Soysaldı)
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What are the effects of ethics on society?
It is impossible to distinguish ethics, faith and worshipping from each other with precise definitions in our religion. Ethics is discussed in many places in the Quran and hadiths. High ethics is praised and people are told to avoid any kind of unethical manner. The fact that when Hazrat Aisha was asked about the Prophet’s ethics, she said “The Honorable Messenger’s ethics consisted of the Quran” (Muslim, Salatu’l-Musafirin, 139) can be an indication of the scope of ethics. As a matter of fact, Allah extols His Messenger (pbuh) in the Quran saying “And thou (standest) on an exalted standard of character.” (al-Qalam, 68:4).
Islam attaches much importance to ethics and considers it “the envelope of the religion.” The Prophet points out to the importance of ethics in Islam saying, “I have been sent in order to complete the high ethics.” (Muwatta, Husnu’l-Khuluq, 8).
The religion has got orders related to ethics in almost all fields; in other words, it is possible to find all ethical rules which are valid for all people in the religion. Actually, religion is, in a sense, a system of ethics the source of which is from Allah. (Gungor, 1995, 17).
Religion is the greatest support for ethical merits one has got. Ethical rules such as employee loyalty, uprightness, justice, affection, respect and helping people can endure only if they are supported by the beliefs in Allah and in the Day of Judgment. One who believes that he will be punished if he violates rights of other people will refrain from violating people’s rights, will follow social rules and avoid unfairness. Unless the idea of divinity of the source is not accepted, the power of ethical rules will decrease. Therefore, the firmest foundation of ethics is religion and it must be religion. (Pazarli, 1987, 39).
Laws cannot control individuals when they are in privacy, away from other people. Since laws are inadequate for disciplining and raising people, and enabling harmony in social life, it is necessary to take people under control by a spiritual authority. And this authority can only be religion. Religion has placed in our hearts a supervisor that supervises all our behaviors at all times. When we are about to do something unethical somewhere far from the police and eyes of other people, the religion which tells us that Allah sees us and He will not leave this behavior unpunished stops us. (Kandemir, 1986, 34, 49).
Crime and Religion
Certainly, reasons of committing crimes and of increase in crimes are various and not criminals are of the same character. Therefore, it is essential to get to know criminals with all their characteristics in the first place. One of the characteristics that should be found out is the religious belief of criminals because the religious belief, or faith, has got a determining role in one’s social behaviors. “Religion is an institution that affects both the individual and the society”, and it is a factor that shapes one’s behaviors in daily life. (Peker, 1990, 95). Certain religious beliefs and attitudes can shape one’s relations with others, ethical behavior and judgments to some extent as religion addresses one’s all abilities and tendencies such as thoughts, feelings, self-control, consciousness and manners. Therefore, the relationship between the level of religiousness and crime has been discussed and researched. Normally, as religion considers committing a crime a sin, one who believes in Allah and that he will be either punished or rewarded after death and fulfills his worshipping is not supposed to commit a crime.
The religion of Islam tells believers to be good and to prevent others from committing evil. We see it in this verse clearly: “They believe in God and the Last Day; they enjoin what is right, and forbid what is wrong; and they hasten (in emulation) in (all) good works: They are in the ranks of the righteous. (Aal-i Imran, 3:114). Allah the Glorious also states that blasphemy and evilness are not for believers’ hearts: “But God has endeared the Faith to you, and has made it beautiful in your hearts, and He has made hateful to you unbelief, wickedness, and rebellion.” (al-Hujurat, 49:7). Requirements of faith and good deeds must be performed with free will, not under pressure, which will please Allah and Allah will reward those behaviors. No matter how many hardships believers may experience in social life, their religious belief prevents them from committing crimes.
Religion is the leading one amongst factors which can control and prevent immorality and crime witnessed within the society. Considering crime not only a crime but also a sin would be a double-preventive reason against committing crimes. According to researches conducted on young people, they have said that religion made their souls peaceful and provided them with a feeling of safety that the religion was the only reality that they could count on and that they would lose their everything if they lost their religion. (Hokelekli, 1993, 115). Feeling of guiltiness results in restlessness in people. And restlessness directs one to return back to his roots. Therefore, getting over restlessness is directly proportional to being closely connected with religious beliefs. (ibid, 114-115).
Once religious belief in society has weakened, ethical and legal crimes follow, because without religion, ethics do not have an enforcing power. When beliefs of halal-haram and punishment-reward in the hereafter are taken away, the order in the society weakens, crimes and anarchy emerge and thus various problems begin. However, one who believes in the Ruling Being who supervises him everywhere always behaves accordingly and prefers goodness to evil. Social dissolutions begin in societies where religion has lost its influence. It is possible to see the most remarkable examples of it especially in western societies. The decline of the family institution, dissolutions of parent-children relationships, regarding sexual deviation as normal, individual and social crises resulting from them, even physical illnesses, abnormal increase in rate of committing crime, over-egoism and over-individualism, absence of feelings of helping and charity in society are enough to show us the importance of the issue.
The negative factors that result from urbanization due to the same reasons in modern societies today are also added to the negative factors that we have mentioned above. Western sociologists find a direct proportion between urbanization and crime. Compared to small towns and villages, more crimes are being committed in large cities and, however, most of the criminals are immigrants, who were not born in those large cities but moved there later. Relation between urbanization and crime, and social dissolution resulting from urbanization are thought to be linked to the dissolution of social relations. (Bilgin, 1997, 137). Powerful control mechanisms in societies in which religious factors are strongly influential prevent violence and crime to a large extent. After all, religion attaches great importance to family and responsibilities of family members for each other. (ibid)
Religion is also a powerful control mechanism in societies in which it is influential. With the help of this mechanism, social values are protected and enabled to prevail. One of the principles of Islam on this issue is to block the roads leading to crime. Islam does not evaluate moral values as abstract values isolated from life. On the one hand, Islam tries to enable individuals to develop and to enable the social control mechanism to function; and on the other hand, with its social and financial principles, it tries to eliminate external factors that lead to crime, at least to minimize them. Crime does not occur all of a sudden. It takes place in the focal point of a large circle which we can call “circle of attraction”, surrounded by psychological, socio-cultural and economical factors. Of course, it does not mean that anyone who gets in this circle will commit a crime but it means that they are potentially ready to do it. The religion of Islam tries to prevent people from getting in this circle. It is possible to liken this circle to a marsh. The marsh must be eliminated in order to cure diseases. The fact that social problems are failed to be solved in secular societies results from overlooking this principle. For instance, although it is known that programs including violence on media encourage people to commit crimes and violence, they are not being restricted anyhow. Similarly, although prostitution is considered a crime and sexual crimes record an increase each year, daily life factors that cause sexual arousal are not prohibited; perversity caused by those factors are overlooked and no control mechanism is employed. However, religion objects to this situation which causes deep damages especially to the ethical structure. After all, allowing factors that cause sexual arousal to roam around leads to not only sexual crimes but also increases other crimes of violence. According to the large-scale research conducted by the Ministry of National Education on high school students, students who watch erotic movies tend towards violence much more than the ones who watch adventure-action movies. (ibid, 138-139).
Many researches have been conducted in order to determine the differences in morals, moral values and the likes between religious and unreligious people and the effects of religion on unreligious behavior. According to the results of these researches, religious people show a better course of conduct compared to unreligious people. For instance, religious people are friendlier towards strangers and foreigners, more generous to charity institutions and far more honest and kinder. (Argyle, 5-6).
Religion and Mental Health-Religion and Depression
Religiousness can affect depression from at least three aspects. First, according to the hypothesis of “social bonding”, religion provides social support from religious society. Such a support earns one some traits, both sensual and intellectual, which decrease the risk of depression. Second, according to the hypothesis of “consistency”, religion decreases depression by giving one hope and optimism. Third, according to the hypothesis of “wisdom”, religion changes the potential of comprehending sorrows and troubles negatively for positive comprehension (Stack, 8). That is to say, it causes people to believe that there is Divine Wisdom, a destinal reason in everything and enables them to approach incidents with a more reasonable and more optimistic point of view. In fact, these three hypotheses are not entirely different from each other and all of them can occur at the same time.
Troubles and the Feeling of Religious Safety
Human beings seek for a support in maelstroms of both “natural” and social lives. Modern philosophy assumed that human beings could defeat nature with the help of science and that they could be saved from the fear caused by “natural events”; however, this philosophy has not earned human beings anything positive, and contrarily, it has caused them to feel lonelier, more isolated and weaker in a meaningless life and a cruel environment, with continuing fear of death. However, religion earns people a different point of view which enables them to trust a merciful and omnipotent Being, who is the Owner of all beings, to feel strong by turning to Him when encountering all kinds of difficulties in life. It also enables them to see the whole universe as an environment of brotherhood and fraternity, and death as a higher degree of life, as a break or retirement from the duty. Human beings find exact peace through faith, through loyalty to Allah and evaluating everything from this window of loyalty. Although they also like this worldly life, which they consider to be a stairway to the eternal life, they are freed from the trap of greediness and jealousy which are the results of considering the worldly life the main aim, and from sensual desires which cause more thirst and greediness once they have been thought to be satisfied.
Faith and Psychological Disorders
The following factors are the leading reasons of psychological disorders:
1- Neglecting the spirit and the needs of the spirit,
2- Losing faith or weakening of faith,
3- Being helpless or feeling helpless about troubles of life,
4- Having contradictions in life,
5- Having guilty conscience because of the people one murdered,
6- Losing the mood of peace safety and getting into a terrible and pessimistic mood,
7- Various disorders caused by some sexual diseases. (Yalcin, 1997, 33).
American psychiatrist Henry Link found out that the main reason for psychological disorders was faithlessness; he returned to faith and invited his patients to return to faith as well. Henry Link, in his book named “Return to Religion”, says, “At first, science caused me to alienate from religion and then it made me return to religion again.” He states that religion helped his patients recover and he encouraged his patients to visit places of worshipping and religious institutions. Explaining the psychological advantages of religion for people, Link says: “Therefore, I would like to say that what matters is not my return to religion, as an individual of the society. What matters is that the science of psychology has discovered the reasons of such return. Various sciences might have earned humankind a lot of values. However, the only factor that provides individuals and the society with eternal peace, relieves the sick by giving them hope of recovering and pours down lights of happiness onto families is faith.” (ibid, 33-34).
A German philosopher Leibniz says: “One should believe in God through reasoning in order to get over psychological disorder or restlessness. Actually, this disorder stems from suspicion firstly and suspicion causes hearts to be destroyed.”
Alexis Carrel states the following on the same subject: “If we are in a terrible situation today, the only and the most important reason for it is that modern society is too much addicted to material values and neglects spiritual values. Addiction to material values failed to prevent humankind from destruction, let alone giving them happiness, because losing real faith has taken people to the edge of a terrible cliff.” (ibid, 34)
If one has got a strong belief in Allah, various beliefs and ideologies cannot conflict in his heart. Thus, he is saved from destructive restlessness caused by these conflicts. It is this destructive restlessness that scholars of psychology want to protect people from. Faithless people or people with weak faith can have psychological chaos because especially such people experience very violent ideological conflicts. As a result of this, they can have various psychological disorders. For this reason, some educators state that it is essential for people to have a strong faith in order to be protected from such terrible consequences in the future. And faithful people are not liable to “psychological disorders”, which are the results of lack of spirituality (religion) since they have got spirituality in their lives as the main element. (ibid, 35)
We can summarize the vital importance of faith as follows:
1- It saves man from dilemmas and conflicts by canalizing the desires and instincts, which were placed in human disposition for certain aims, to the way of Allah.
2- It gives people enthusiasm and freshness in order to advance in the sight of Allah, and thus, they begin enjoying struggle in life.
3- It gives people a feeling of responsibility towards Allah and thus enables them to follow the right path and avoid perversity.
4- It makes people avoid the wrong path, murder and unlawfulness.
5- It enables people to be righteous and to avoid hypocrisy.
6- It gives people endurance against difficulties by directing them to seek refuge with Allah, the Omnipotent.
7- It protects people from “psychological disorders.”
8- It saves people from eternal Hell.
9- It teaches people the meaning and reason of existence.
10- It saves people from the thought of eternal absence. (ibid, 36)
In short, with Badiuzzaman’s evaluation, faith is a seed of Heaven in the heart and faithlessness is a seed of Hell. Faith is the source of courage, and of all kinds of virtues. A believing person can challenge the universe and gets over all kinds of groundless fears.
Uniting Function of Religion
Religious people are more resistant to the depressions of daily life. Religious people have got a spiritual haven they can seek refuge in against difficulties. They have got a stronger self-control. They think that life is full of tests and they have got to be patient. Religion also symbolizes stability in our constantly changing society. Therefore, religious people in changing societies feel the psychological effects of changes more slightly. This is important because Durkheim considers that the main reason of the increase in suicide cases is changing the structure of the society. According to Durkheim, it does not matter whether the change is useful or harmful for the society. Changes in social structure turn individuals’ life conditions and spiritual values upside down. And the real reason of suicide is this situation of chaos. (Bilgin, 140-141).
According to the report presented in the Doctors of Psychology Congress that was held in Istanbul, 1st October 1967, it was recorded that a substantial number of people in our country suffered from psychological disorders. It is the same in the United States. Doctor Link states that 47 % of patients in hospitals which he visited suffered from psychological disorders. The American doctor states that the only way of getting over these individual and social problems, which are constantly spreading, is to return to religion, at the end of many researches. And actually, he wrote his book in order to prove this opinion. (Pazarli, 37).
Henry Link writes the following in his book:
“Like many of my colleagues, I did not care about religion and religious matters at first and I was always busy with my daily works and my patients. In a period of 15 years, I examined and treated about 4000 patients. The majority of my patients used to complain about problems at home, failures in jobs, not getting well with people around and that religious teachings and rules which they had learnt in churches did not comply with scientific and technological developments. These illnesses are psychological disorders which can be witnessed everywhere and within any group of people. Nevertheless, I noticed that most of my advice to these patients was about religion. And actually, they understood and put into practice these religious and moral advices rather than scientific explanations. This is how I began to be interested in religious matters, due to my professional obligation.”
Later, Doctor Henry Link worked in New York Center for Psychological Studies for a few years and conducted 15.226 psychological tests. Eventually, these tests came up with this result: “Personality and character of people who are followers of a religion and who visit a place of worshipping regularly are stronger than and superior to those of people who have got no interest in religion and do not visit any places of worshipping.” (Link, 1949, 22).
Although psychological disorders can be witnessed in people from all professions and all personalities without any discrimination, only people who continue their lives in accordance with religion are an exception.
Dr. Mehmet Tevfik Ozcan, in his book named “Ruhi Bunalımlar ve İslam Ruhiyatı (Psychological Problems and Islamic Spirituality)”, says: “Depending on thousands of examinations and medical notions that I carried out in Bakirkoy Mental Institution, I stated in International Neuropsychiatry Congress on 7th May 1970 that psychological disorders were not witnessed in faithful people who followed the path of religion and they will not. Neurotic problems stemming from mental illnesses and all kinds of depression, loads of psycho-somatic organic illnesses and behavioral disorders happen only when one is away from the path of religion.” (Ozcan, 1985, 117).
Clinic Studies and Examinations on the Role of Lack of Faith in the Emergence of Psychological Disorders
“In 19th century and at the beginning of 20th century, the science of medicine was entirely materialistic. Through the end of 20th century, “esprit medical” (psychology-psychiatry) was on the agenda again. And now religion has become a subject for study and research in psychiatry because, it is accepted that lack of spiritual and religious conscience lies in the origin of psychological disorders. And this lacking is the main reason of many psychological disorders from melancholia and hebephrenia to schizophrenia. (ibid, 119). Prof. Jung and his students stress that it is essential to strive for the development and advancement of religious in disposition in order to cure mental disorders. On the same subject, H. Sing says, in one of his articles that was published in “Magazine of Psychology” in India in the year of 1965: “I suggest and hope that the importance and value of a treatment based on religion and morals would be appreciated and we would reach this level.” (ibid, 119).
Consequently, both in protection from psychological disorders and in the treatment of psychological disorders - as Arlette Bouruer says - many authorities agree on the importance of religious discipline and religious treatment. (ibid, 120).
Suicide and Religion
Suicide is prohibited in religions and it is stated that those who commit suicide will be exposed to eternal punishment in the Hereafter. In parallel to this, cases of suicide are seen less in the societies which are more attentive in the practice of religious rules and which have got a strict attitude towards suicide. For instance, statistics show that more cases of suicide are seen in Protestant countries than Catholic countries. (Bilgin, 1997, 141).
On this subject, the Prophet (pbuh) said: “Whoever kills himself with a piece of iron (commits suicide) he will keep stabbing his own stomach with that piece of iron in his hands in Hell. Whoever kills himself by taking poison in, he will keep drinking that poison in Hell. Whoever kills himself by jumping off somewhere high, he will keep throwing himself off high places in Hell.” (Bukhari, “Medicine”, 56; Muslim, “Faith”, 175).
When we look at cases of suicide committed in developed countries, we will see that the rate is quite high. For instance, the rate of suicide cases amongst young people in the United States has tripled in recent years. Suicide is the third death reason amongst young people of this country, following accidents and murders as first and second death reasons, and it is likely to be the second one soon. The situation in other developed countries is not different from the States. The fact that young people in countries such as Austria, Denmark, the Netherlands, Germany, Hong Kong, Hungary and Japan have chosen suicide as the solution of their problems is a terrible reality that those countries have to deal with. (McCullough, 1987, 107).
Why do people commit suicide, ending their lives, the most precious thing they have got? What are the reasons that make people commit suicide? What do they think ending their lives will solve? Many questions like these can be asked. And in response to them, the following can be said: lots of money, lots of alcohol, lots of wealth, lots of chemicals and inadequate love provided by parents. It is necessary to add boredom, nervousness, fear, obstacles, hopelessness, low self-esteem and feeling of guiltiness to them. (ibid)
Therefore, it is seen that cases of suicide are increasing in number day by day in faithless societies. It is possible to deduce that to what extent the number of suicide cases has increased from statistics uttered by scientists while discussing social problems. Thousands of people commit suicide every year, ending their lives with their own hands. Apart from those thousands of people, many other people commit a different suicide: This suicide is an internal suicide. Their lives do not end all of a sudden. They die slowly. They are first defeated by feelings of defeat, dissatisfaction, hopelessness and despair. (Yalçın, 27-28).
The most significant and the most effective way of preventing suicide is a firm faith and religious life. Actually, one who believes in Allah and the Day of Judgment is patient with and resistant to troubles and difficulties of life. Religion enables individuals to develop in terms of ethics and to have a strong personality. What matters is not one’s following social norms only, but also following religious and moral rules in his private life and inner world. We see that almost all religions have got practices related to “self-control training”. For instance, excluding some extremist practices of some religious philosophies, five times daily prayers of Islam performed within certain time-spans and Ramadan fasting are practices which are quite simple but which discipline and enable self-control. In addition to this, behaviors such as avoiding lying and backbiting while speaking, refraining from unfairness and cruelty in relationships with other people help one to develop a strong self-control and a strong personality. Religious people are resistant to daily life’s troubles. They have got a stronger self-control. Religion also symbolizes stability in the rapidly changing society. (Bilgin, 134-135).
Two important aspects of religious life are “faith” and “regular worshipping”. The stronger these two aspects are, the more positive one’s harmony with society and life is and the less the possibility of committing suicide is. (Stack, 2).
Stack determined the main theses of his theory, in which he showed the relation between religiousness, religious belief and suicide, as follows: First, as the otherworldly life promises happiness, it can balance troubles of people, who are stressed by - for instance - unemployment, divorce, poverty and so on, in a positive way. If people consider this stress as a temporary phenomenon, with the help of the notion of eternality stemming from belief in the Hereafter, their resistance to stress increases. Second, sorrows and troubles may have a meaning. One meaning of troubles encountered is to show the importance of patience against sorrows and troubles. Third, believing that God supervises us and knows people’s troubles makes people more patient. Fourth, religion offers a holy rank or system of classification in alternation to the system of classification based on the materialistic understanding of the society. Therefore, one can develop his self-esteem and personality by aiming at success in spirituality and religion, especially if he failed in the hierarchic order of society. Fifth, belief in a God who hears and responds to wishes can enable some people to get over problems of life conditions. Sixth, religion usually talks of poverty by praising it. Seventh, belief in the existence of Satan directs one to struggle against evil. Eighth and the last, religions offer ideal models (ideal type of person). For instance, Prophet Job (Ayyub) is one of them. This kind of people endured sorrows and troubles and did not attempt to commit suicide because of difficulties in life. These eight items of course should not be considered a list of life-saving beliefs. Nevertheless, it must be seen as a list of examples which show how a few basic elements of faith decrease the risk of suicide. (Stack, 5).
Stack also proved that the rate of suicide cases was low in regions where the rate of religiousness was high, in his study that included 25 industrialized countries. This discovery is valid especially for women. (Stack, 6).
Dissolution in Families, Divorce and Religion
The family is, probably, the most important basic element of the society, as a sociological reality. The family is a small model of the society and a strong family institution is the base of a strong nation and state. The religion of Islam considers the family an indispensable element of social life. (Kostaş, 1995, 76-78).
The family is the leading one of the matters which religion attaches great importance to. The stronger is the structure of the family, the stronger is the structure of the society. Therefore, not only governments as political authorities but also religions deem family very important and take it under their protection. For this reason, divorce is not favored in religions. The religion of Islam does not prohibit divorce but considers it a permissible option under some certain conditions. However, it is stressed that it is not favored by Allah.
Religion has got deep and permanent effects on health and happiness of the families and the society. Cases of divorce is seen less with religious people and they maintain their marriages more successfully. Religion certainly rejects some factors that threaten the family. The leading one of them is fornication. The religion of Islam prohibits fornication certainly. Therefore, we can easily say that as religiousness in a society increases, the number of unmarried relationships can decrease in that society. (Aktaş Y, Köktaş M, 1998, 115).
One of the most remarkable indications of dissolution in a family is the increase in divorce rates. Today, societies with the highest rate of divorce are Western civilizations, and United States and Russia are the leading ones amongst them. (Arıkan, 1996, 21).
It is seen that Turkey is one of the countries with the lowest rate of divorce when the rates of divorce in some countries and in Turkey are investigated according to the Annual of Demography 1992 by United Nations. (ibid, 21). Although the rate of divorce is quite low when compared to Western countries, it shows a constantly increasing graphic and it is increasing year by year in parallel to the increase of religious and moral degeneration. While the rate of divorce in Turkey was 0,37 per mille, it was 0,46 per mille in 1994. According to the regions in Turkey, the rate of divorce is higher in the Aegean and Marmara regions by 0,63 per mille and it is 0,13 per mille in the East and South-East regions. As it can be deduced, in regions where traditions based on religion prevail, the cases of divorce are less. (Aktaş, Köktaş, 118).
Harmful Habits and Religion
The religion of Islam adopts an obvious attitude against harmful habits that cause deep damages to social life and lead to individual and social problems; and Islam wants believers to follow its rules about them.
There are many Quranic verses and hadiths related to this subject. For instance:
“O ye who believe! Intoxicants and gambling, (dedication of) stones, and (divination by) arrows, are an abomination,- of Satan's handwork: eschew such (abomination), that ye may prosper. Satan's plan is (but) to excite enmity and hatred between you, with intoxicants and gambling, and hinder you from the remembrance of God, and from prayer: will ye not then abstain?” (al-Maidah, 5:90-91).
The Prophet (pbuh) says in one of his hadiths: “A fornicator is an unbeliever while s/he fornicates. A thief is an unbeliever while s/he steals. An alcohol drinker is an unbeliever while s/he drinks.” (Muslim, “Faith”, 24).
Religious Belief and Hope
People want to get over difficulties of daily life, weakness, fear, awe and bewilderment they feel due to problems which they cannot get over and situations they cannot solve, to eliminate their worries about their future and their end and to find a continuous inner peace. (Ünal, 1998, 88).
Religion eases one’s pains and sorrows and consoles him. One can find peace by getting over his hopelessness with the help of his faith. Religion also protects people from hopelessness as a power which eases their pains by strengthening feelings of self-renunciation, self-sacrifice, patience, struggle and hope. (Uysal, 1996, 123). Religion gives people information, trust and confidence about life and after-death. It also places a feeling of safety – which is not temporary - in people’s spirits. Therefore, religion is the source of basic feeling of safety. Actually, one happens to find safety, which does not exist in the world he lives in, by believing in a sublime Might and following Him. A faithful person can get over the crises of hopelessness, which unfaithful people often fall into, with the help of his trust in Allah. (Ünal, 1998, 88)
Man struggles to get over difficulties he encounters from his birth to death and to adjust himself to constantly changing conditions. One’s endurance and resistance increase with the help of his belief and he becomes free from dependence on others and he can find in himself the power to deal with problems of life. For this reason, it helps develop a strong personality structure. Absence of belief in Allah means the absence of a strong personality. Such a person is quite weak in his personality and is likely to be depressed and to lose his hopes easily when he encounters small problems and difficulties. (ibid, 89)
Moreover, belief in the Hereafter is quite effective on making people hopeful by helping them find response to their desire of immortality, to justice and happiness which they cannot find in this world, by helping them to get over their disappointments and enabling them to get rewards for their good deeds and making them hopeful. (ibid., 93-94).
Social Dissolution and Religion
Western civilization, and the whole world influenced by it, have experienced a great change in the process of industrialization and urbanization. People’s style of settlement, life-styles, socio-cultural and economical values, which went through little change for hundreds of years, have gone through changes. And religious beliefs have also had their share from these changes. (Bilgin, 75)
With the emergence of industrialization, inequality between people reached its highest level; social classes emerged, with large gaps between them. Even women and children started to work for livelihood. As industrialization developed and cities enlarged, communities of solidarity diminished. (ibid, 78). Urbanization resulting from industrialization has emerged as a different problem., People experienced depressions especially due to difficulties of migration to cities and of adjustment to new environment.
Religion emphasizes helping each other and cooperation instead of relations based on interest. It is the source of spiritual values that keep one standing. It protects one from loneliness, as an individual who gets lost in cities and in modern society, with its rules and institutions that provide congregation. It never leaves individuals alone. It provides them with a spiritual shield, which is relatives, and it guarantees their livelihood in a sense. It also attaches great importance to relations with neighbors and relatives. Religion also creates a mutual culture and nobody feels left out in the atmosphere of this culture. Religion is, after all, the sum of rules determined by the Creator who knows mankind and its nature. The more effective is religion in social life, the less cultural conflicts there are between social groups. (ibid, 79). It is seen that urbanization, distorted city life, and some practices which are based on imitating the West only in Turkey do not cause as much depression as they cause in Western civilizations. This is because people have got opportunities of cooperation, helping each other and reuniting with society, self-realization and expressing themselves especially with the help of congregations.
References
AKTAŞ, Yasin, KÖKTAŞ M. Emin, Din Sosyolojisi, Vadi Publications, May 1998.
ARGYLE Michael A., Advances in the Psychology of Religion, Trns: Talip Küçükcan, Din Psikolojisi Alanındaki Yeni Gelişmeler, Türkiye Diyanet Vakfı İslâm Araştırmaları Merkezi, İstanbul.
ARIKAN, Çiğdem, Halkın Boşanmaya İlişkin Tutumları Araştırması, Başbakanlık Aile Araştırma Kurumu Bilim Serisi 96, Ankara, November 96.
BİLGİN, Vejdi, Sosyal Çözülme ve Din, Etüd Yayınları, 1997.
GÜNGÖR, Erol, Ahlâk Psikolojisi Ve Sosyal Ahlâk, Ötüken Yy. 1. Basım 1995.
HÖKELEKLİ, Hayati, Din Psikolojisi, Türkiye Diyanet Vakfı Yayınları Ankara 1993.
KANDEMİR, M. Yaşar, Örneklerle İslâm Ahlâkı, Nesil yay. Yaylacık, mat, 5. bs. İst. 1986.
KOSTAŞ Münir, Üniversite Öğrencilerinde Dine Bakış, Türkiye Diyanet Vakfı Yayınları, Ankara , 1995.
LİNK, Henri, Dine Dönüş (Çev: Ömer Rıza Doğrul), Ahmet Halit Kitavebi, İst. 1949.
Mc CULLOUGH, Leslie, "İntihar: Sebepleri Nedir ve Ona Nasıl Engel Olunur?" Trns: Yrd. Doç. Dr. Hüseyin Peker, Ondokuz Mayıs Üniversitesi İlahiyat Fakültesi Dergisi, sayı: 2 Samsun 1987.
ÖZCAN, Mehmet Tevfik, Ruhî Bunalımlar Ve İslâm Ruhiyatı, Ankara, 1985.
PAZARLI, Osman, Din Psikolojisi, Remzi Kitabevi, İstanbul 1987.
PEKER, Hüseyin, "Suçlularda Dini Davranışlar," Ondokuz Mayıs Üniversitesi İlahiyat Fakültesi Dergisi, Sayı: 4, Samsun, 1990.
STACK, Steven, Translated by Dr. Talip Küçükcan, Dindarlık, Depresyon Ve İntihar, İslâm Araştırmaları Merkezi İstanbul.
UYSAL, Veysel, Din Psikolojisi Açısından Dini Tutum Davranış Ve Şahsiyet Özellikleri, İstanbul, 1996.
ÜNAL, Nurten, Dini İnanç, İbadet Ve Duanın Umutsuzlukla İlişkisi (Üniversiteli Gençler Üzerinde Bir Araştırma) Yüksek Lisans Tezi, Bursa, 1998.
YALÇIN, Mikdat, İman ve Ahlâkın Hayati Değerleri, İmanın Lüzum Ve Değeri, Örnek Medeniyet Eğitim Ve Kültür Araştırmaları Vakfı İstanbul 1997.
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What is Envy and What are the Disadvantages of Envy?
Fudail Bin Iyad, one of the scholars of Islam, says: A believer emulates, a munafiq (hypocrite) envies. That phrase includes a very nice criterion and also a grievous threat. Man could want to have the same material or spiritual grants that another man obtained. It is not envy but emulation. While showing envy it is desired that the grants should absolutely be seized from that envied man. That is to say, the main objective of a man who envies his affluent neighbor is not to be affluent but his neighbor to be poor. It is a disgraceful and mean property of hypocrites.
However, it is definitely not right to regard people who show envy as hypocrites
The definition of hypocrite is clear: A hypocrite is someone who seems to believe although he does not indeed believe. It is not possible to call a believer who shows envy hypocrite according to this definition. Then, we should comprehend that expression as: Do not envy, because it is such a malicious quality that only fits to hypocrites.
By being infected with disease of envy, a person who becomes unhappy because of the gain of others but not his loss, shows the supreme example of ignorance in business.
Hazrat Badiuzzaman advices a cure for recovering from envy: Let the envious reflect on the ultimate fate of those things that arouse his enmity. Then he will understand that the beauty, strength, rank, and wealth possessed by his rival are transient and temporary. (Letters)
The underlying reason of the illness of envy is the ignorance of supposing the envied person and his worldly properties as infinite. From the rational point of view, everyone knows that the reality is not as what they suppose to be but when feelings gain control, the poor reason cannot help thinking so.
In a century, people who envy and who are envied will not exist, so ranks, authorities, wealth and governments which are subject to envy will be possessed by others; and then they will be busy with those objectives for a while and eventually they will be taken by others without really belonging to any of them.
There is also an aspect of envy which criticizes the Divine Determining.
Or do they envy mankind for what Allah has given them of his bounty? (an-Nisa), 54)
In the noble verse mentioned above there is a wise notification as Allah has given them of his bounty By attributing this notification, scholars of interpretation stated that it was permissible to envy wealth not gained through illegal ways and added the following: To wish that a defrauder would lose his property is not envy but diligence and justice.
According to this last interpretation, it is not envying to wish that a man who becomes affluent by stealing would lose his property. Envy is to be unable to stand licit affluence, a rank or a virtue that Allah has given them of his bountyAs for wishing that those would be seized from a believer means criticizing Divine Determining and opposing mercy.
Let us imagine a man who tried his utmost worked in the licit bounds and started to wait for Allahs mercy and favor after performing active and verbal supplications to obtain a certain blessing. The duty of a believer when he sees the Divine favor bestowed that man is to be happy as if it was bestowed on him. Belief in Divine Determining and Islamic fraternity requires that attitude.
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What should our style of speech be like? What are the appropriate manners for speaking? What about the appropriate manners for listening?
“Everything man says is against him; except for suggesting goodness, preventing others from badness or invocating Allah the Glorious.”
“Do not say anything for which you will have to say you are sorry!” (Ibn Majah, Zuhd, 15).
The hadith related to the topic is as follows:
Umm Habiba reports: “The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “Everything man says is against him; except for suggesting goodness, preventing others from badness or invocating Allah the Glorious.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd 63, (2414).)
Aliyyu’l-Kari says: “The obvious meaning of the hadith indicates that all kinds of speeches except for suggesting goodness and preventing badness or invocating Allah the Glorious are against people, and there is no other kind of speech. However, these kinds of hadiths must be understood as a means of preventing people from going to extremes and from aimless speech. It is sure that allowable (mubah) speech will not be useful in the hereafter.
When Quranic verses and hadiths related to the topic are taken into consideration, this hadith means: “Man’s words which are other than those mentioned in the hadith and the likes are a means of sadness and regret for him. There is nothing good in them for him. Many other hadiths on the same topic strengthen this view, too. It is possible that this hadith was taken from the following Quranic verse: “In most of their secret talks there is no good: But if one exhorts to a deed of charity or justice or conciliation between men, (Secrecy is permissible): To him who does this, seeking the good pleasure of God, We shall soon give a reward of the highest (value).” (an-Nisa, 114)
In this case, all kinds of speech other than speeches on topics such as goodness, helping, friendship and the likes mentioned in hadiths are not for people’s goodness. Stating only three exceptions in the hadith indicates both the importance of speaking about these three things and warns us to be very careful in other allowable topics. Scholars stress that speeches which are allowable (mubah), which means there is no objection to talk about them in religion, will not be useful for people in the hereafter, although they are not bad for them, either. Ordinary daily talk is allowable; however, it runs the risk of getting involved in backbiting, gossiping and useless matters. All kinds of allowable (mubah) things are like this. Therefore, the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) asked believers to be very careful in their manners of speech, while showing them the ways of a lifestyle that is the most appropriate for Allah’s content and the hereafter. (See Canan, Ibrahim, Kutub-u Sitte, 16781-2).
Appropriate Manners of Speaking
Thinking and speaking are the most important characteristics which distinguish human beings from other beings. Due to the relationship between them, speaking is like a smooth mirror which shows the speaker’s level of intellect and structure of thinking. Therefore, what makes a human being a human being is his ability to speak. Islam demands believers to discipline their words and has determined many principles in this field.
A believer, first of all, should start speaking after saying basmala and praising Allah. Every important thing started without basmala and praising Allah will be incomplete. (Abu Dawud, Adab 18; Ibn Majah, Nikah 19). Speaking too much without mentioning Allah makes hearts tougher and people with tough hearts are alienated from Allah. (Tirmidhi, Zuhd 62)
Ability of speaking is a great gift from Allah, which enables communication, affection and agreement among people. That is to say, people usually express their feelings, thoughts, desires and demands by speaking. A style of speech and words that one employs can make him either successful or unsuccessful in life. Moreover, controlling one’s tongue is listed amongst things that lead people to Heaven. The Messenger of Allah says:
“Whoever promises me to protect what is between his two chins (tongue) and honor and virtue, I will promise him Heaven.” (Bukhari, Riqaq 23). In another hadith, when the Messenger of Allah is asked who the most virtuous person is, he answers: “He is the one from whose tongue and hand Muslims are safe.” (Bukhari, Faith, 4-5). The Prophet determined some rules related to the appropriate manners of speaking, which can be listed as follows:
1- One must speak clearly and understandably, in a way that his addressee can understand him. Important issues must be repeated when necessary. As a matter of fact, the Companions have got very important remarks about the Prophet who spoke clearly and fluently:
“The Messenger of Allah’s speech was so clear that every listener could understand it easily.” (Abu Dawud, Adab, 18).
“When he spoke, one could count his words if he wished to.” (Bukhari, Manaqib, 23)
“He used to repeat the words and sentences which he wanted to be understood very well three times.” (Tirmidhi, Manaqib, 9).
Sometimes it may be necessary to repeat the words so that they will be understood by addressee very well. Therefore, matters which are worthy of utmost attention are repeated a few times in the Quran. For instance, Satan’s rebelling against the Divine Order and refusing to prostrate is repeated seven times and the situation of magicians who believed in Prophet Moses is repeated four times.
Our Prophet used to repeat remarkable verses sometimes two times and sometimes three times while leading prayers. Sometimes he repeated some words when he warned and gave advice to the Companions. It is possible to see such repetitions frequently in speeches of the lovers of Allah. however, it should be with the aim of instilling, should not be boring and should be appropriate for people’s level.
Speaking in places where there is nobody who can understand what is said means nothing but wasting breaths. Actually, just like Mashhhuri said “Smart ones do not speak a word unless it is timely.”
2- It is strictly prohibited to make insincere speeches with the aim of showing off as a know-it-all and as superior to others or to speaking to people with words that they cannot understand. Our dearest Prophet said:
“Surely Allah dislikes those who beat about the bush using verbiage just like cattle chew grass while eating.” (Abu Dawud, Adab, 94).
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him), whose duty was to spread the truth, never worried about artiness in his speeches. Our dearest Prophet spoke with the most natural expressions of his soul, with purest feelings of affection and mercy. Therefore, his blessed words had a different beauty and they were in a beautiful manner that was appropriate for his honorableness.
3- One must not speak loudly yelling and shouting. It is wrong to speak loudly as if the addressee was dumb and to speak aggressively as if they were quarrelling. It is always the most appropriate way to adopt a kind and gentle style. In the Quran, Luqman suggests the method in question to his son as follows: “(Son!) And be moderate in thy pace, and lower thy voice; for the harshest of sounds without doubt is the braying of the ass.” (Luqman, 31:19). In another verse, Allah says:
“Say to My servants that they should (only) say those things that are best” (al-Isra, 17:53). Moreover, Allah wanted Prophet Moses and his brother Aaron to warn the Pharaoh moderately. (Ta Ha, 20:43-44). Even though our addressee is an unbeliever, we are ordered to speak to him nicely. A hadith says that we can be saved from the wrath of Hell with a nice word we say:
“Save yourself from Hell by giving even half of a date. If you cannot find it either, save yourself from Hell even with a nice word!” (Muslim, Zakat, 68).
4- Talking of two people in whispers between them when there is another one with them is prohibited. The Messenger of Allah stated that such a manner could cause the one who was left out to be upset. (Bukhari, Isti’zan, 47). However, a mature Muslim does not want to do anything that can upset his brother/sister or break his/her heart.
5- If a topic is being discussed in a community or if a question is asked to be answered, the right of first word belongs to the senior man of the community. However, other people can tell their opinions in an appropriate way when necessary. As a matter of fact, when Abdurrahman bin Sahl, who was the youngest one in the community, started to speak in order to tell something, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said to him “Leave it to your senior (older) ones, leave it to your senior (older) ones!” and then senior ones narrated it. (Bukhari, Jizyah, 12).
Abdullah bin Umar reports: One day, the Messenger of Allah said to his Companions: “Tell me a tree which is like believers!” They started to name all trees, which existed in desert, one by one. I thought it was date tree and I wanted to say it right away. However, I hesitated to speak because there were people who were older than me. When they failed to give the correct answer and kept silent, the Prophet said it was date tree.” (Muslim, Munafiqin, 64).
6- One must talk little and to the point, and must avoid unnecessary details. In other words, it is necessary to make it a habit to speak little, to the point and in an appropriate way. While listing believers’ positive characteristics, Allah says:
“(They are) who avoid vain talk.” (al-Mu’minun 23:3) and considers talking nonsense as perversity and heedlessness. (Luqman, 31:6).
And the Prophet emphasizes the topic with the following hadiths:
“Do not talk unless you mention Allah! Talking too much, except for mentioning Allah, makes hearts tougher. And it is doubtless that people with tough hearts are away from Allah.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd, 62).
“It is because one is a good Muslim when s/he quits something which does not interest him/her directly.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd, 11).
Taslicali Yahya, to mean that those who speak too much make lots of mistakes, says:
“This parable is told by people of heart
Whoever speaks a lot errs a lot.”
7- One should strictly avoid talks which have neither worldly nor otherworldly benefits but are harmful because
“Not a word does he utter but there is a sentinel by him, ready (to note it).” (Qaf, 50:18). This Quranic verse states that one will be called to account for every word he spoke in his entire life. And the Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
“He who believes in Allah and the Day of Judgment should either say something good or keep silent.” (Bukhari, Adab, 31, 85).
8- It is inappropriate for one to say a word of which he is not sure if it is halal or haram, ugly or nice, good or bad yet. The following stated in a hadith:
“One says a word without thinking about it well and he falls down to somewhere far away between the east and the west of Hell.” (Bukhari, Riqaq, 23). Actually, our ancestors were inspired by hadiths like this when they said “Think a thousand times and say it once” and other nice proverbs.
9- It is very important to avoid words which can put us in trouble in bilateral relations in order to continue friendships. The Prophet said:
“Do not say a word for which you will have to apologize!” (Ibn Majah, Zuhd, 15).
10- A believer must always tell the truth and must avoid lies and falsified news strictly. The Messenger of Allah said:
“When one wakes up in the morning, all of his organs address the tongue and say: Fear Allah when protecting our rights! We will be punished only for what you say. We are bound to you. If you are upright, we are upright, too. If you bend and stray from the right way, we will follow you and be like you.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd, 61). And the Quran warns us as follows:
“O ye who believe! Fear God, and (always) say a word directed to the Right: That He may make your conduct whole and sound and forgive you your sins: He that obeys God and His Apostle, has already attained the highest achievement.” (al-Ahzab, 33:70-71).
11- It is another ethical principle related to speech to say “inshaallah (God willing) when talking about future. Humans’ free will is not an adequate reason for something to happen. What matters is Allah’s will. Actually, saying “inshaallah” when making a wish about the future means that you are aware of Allah’s will and that you do not recognize any other will superior to Allah’s. As a matter of fact, a Quranic verse says: “Nor say of anything, "I shall be sure to do so and so tomorrow" - without adding, "So please God!" and call thy Lord to mind when thou forgettest, and say, "I hope that my Lord will guide me ever closer (even) than this to the right road." (al-Kahf, 18:23-24). It is stated in a hadith that Prophet Solomon’s wish related to future did not come true because he did not say “inshaallah.” (Bukhari, Ayman, 3).
Appropriate Manners of Listening
Allah the Glorious gave humans two ears but only one mouth. One should be a good listener to be able to be a good speaker. Ears were endowed upon people so that they could listen to and learn goodness and listen to orders of Allah and His Messenger, of parents and teachers/masters and obey them. And Allah’s verses are for those who hear and listen. It is bad for people to listen to lies, gossips, backbiting, talks which lead one to sinning and secrets of other people. And it is fornication of ears to listen to nasty talks. (Bukhari, Isti’zan 12; Fate 9; Muslim, Fate 20-21). It is because nasty words have a negative effect on people and spoil their minds.
It leads one to make mistakes to listen to everything and to say everything he has heard. The Prophet (pbuh) said: “It is enough as lying for someone to say everything he hears.” (Muslim, Muqaddima 5).
Beautiful voices and sounds sound nice to the ear but when one is captivated by them, they waste his time.
One should listen to the Quran recitation and advice a lot as a means of thanks-giving for his ears. One should keep quiet and listen to the Quran as soon as he hears it being recited so that he can receive mercy.
One should not be one of those who say they have heard although they have not indeed and should turn his back to nonsense talks right away.
May Allah let all of us be one of those true servants who listen to and follow what is the best! Amin!
11-)
Could you please list the rights of parents over their children?
Although man is the strongest among all the creatures, he is one of the most defenseless when he is born. Unlike animals, some of which can stand right after birth and some others can stand a while later after birth and begin to fulfill their needs, human can only reach this level years later after his birth. It is parents who bear all the difficulties for the maintenance of the human generation. Mothers carry their babies in their wombs for nine months and they come across many difficulties during pregnancy and they give birth to their babies, facing life-threatening dangers. They renounce their sleep and rest and health only in order to raise their babies which are unable to do anything. Likewise, As a matter of fact, Allah states the following :
“We have enjoined on human in respect with his parents: his mother bore him in strain upon strain, and his weaning was in two years. (So, O human,) be thankful to Me and to your parents.” (the Qur’an, Luqman, 31:14). The father works hard constantly to meet the needs of the family and the child. If the child hurts himself, the parents become more disturbed than him. They prefer the child’s comfort to their own comfort. This hard labor lasts for twenty or thirty years in different phases and forms. In addition, the parent’s care for their child last life long.
This relation of right-duty which is caused by love and respect that Allah created between the child and the parents, is an indispensable condition for the maintenance of the human generation healthily and strongly and without corruption.
We can list the rights of parents over their children as follows:
1. Obedience (respect): The most important duty of the children for their parents is to obey them and carry out their demands unless religiously forbidden. God states the following: “(As the requirement for being good Muslims) We have enjoined on human to be kind and good to his parents; but if they endeavor to make you associate with Me anything as partner, about whose being so you impossibly have no knowledge, do not obey them.” (the Qur’an, al-Ankabut, 29:8)
The Prophet (pbuh) states the following in a hadith : “Allah forbids disobedience to your mothers” ( Bukhari, Adab, 4)
As can be understood from the verses and hadiths given above, it is Allah’s command to fulfill parents’ demands and wishes and not to object to them. However, if the parents ask the child to stand up against Allah and deny Him and not to do what He sets obligatory and to do what He forbids, these demands of theirs cannot be fulfilled because a person must not obey people if the issues involve rebellion against Allah even if those people are his parents.
2. Treating parents well. In the Qur’an, Allah states the following while listing the duties of a person toward other people:
“Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him alone, and treat parents with the best of kindness. Should one of them, or both, attain old age in your lifetime, do not say "Ugh!" to them (as an indication of complaint or impatience), nor push them away; and always address them in gracious words. Lower to them the wing of humility out of mercy, and say: "My Lord, have mercy on them even as they cared for me in childhood.” (the Qur’an, al-Isra’, 17:23-24)
The Prophet replied a person who asked for three times, “ Who is more entitled to be treated with the best companionship by me?”, “your mother” and for the forth time he replied that he should treat his father well. ( Bukhari, Adab, 2; Muslim, Birr, 1).
Although the parents have not treated their children well enough and they have even caused them some damage, the children should treat them well because, as people grow older, they act childishly. It is our debt of gratitude to treat those who responded with a smile to our mistakes and wrongs in our childhood as they did to us when they need our care.
3. Fulfilling their needs. It is the children’s duty to fulfill all the needs of their parents when they become too old to fulfill them on their own. This is not only a moral duty but also a legal one. Those who do not fulfill this duty are forced to do it by Islamic Administration. Allah charges the children with this duty : “They ask you what they will spend (to provide sustenance for the needy). Say: "Whatever you spend of your wealth is for (your) parents and the near relatives, and the (needy) orphans, the destitute, and the wayfarer. " Whatever good you do, surely God has full knowledge of it.” (the Qur’an, al-Baqarah, 2:215).
Abu Darda from the Honored Companions states that the Prophet advised him nine important things and that one of them is fulfilling the needs of the members of the family including parents. (Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 9). In addition, the Prophet (pbuh) sent a person who wanted to join the jihad to his parents due to their need for him. (Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 9)
4. Not treating them disrespectfully. The principle of the ummah of Islam is respect for the elders and love for the young people. Those who deserve respect the most and those whom we should not even think of disrespect against are our parents. One day, the Prophet (pbuh) said to his Companions:
-“ Allah's Apostle said thrice, "Shall I not inform you of the biggest of the great sins?" The Honored Companions replied: "Yes, O Allah's Apostle" He said, "To join partners in worship with Allah, to be undutiful to one's parents and to give a forged statement and a false witness; I warn you against giving a forged statement and a false witness." (Bukhari, Adab, 6)
-To a person who said “ I left my parents crying after me and I came to take your command to emigrate”, the Prophet (pbuh) said:
-“ Turn to them and make them smile the way you made them cry and make them happy” and he sent him to his parents who were not even yet Muslims.
5. Receiving their consent. There is no doubt that the most important duty of a person in the world is to receive Allah’s consent. After that, it is our parents whose consent we need to receive. As can be seen in the verses from the Qur’an above, Allah commanded people to worship him first and right after this, to treat parents dutifully; and the Prophet (pbuh) stated “ Allah’s consent is due to the father’s consent and His rage is due to his rage”. (Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 1; Tirmidhi, Birr, 3). The mother’s position, who comes before the father, is the same in dutiful treatment by the children.
Allah's Apostle (pbuh) said thrice: “Let him be humbled into dust”. The Honored Companions asked: “Allah's Messenger, who is he?” He said: “He who sees either of his parents during their old age or he sees both of them, but he does not enter Paradise.” (Muslim, Birr, 9)
According to the report of Abdullah b. Amr al-As, a man came to the Prophet (pbuh) and asked for his permission to join the jihad. The Prophet (pbuh) asked him : “Are your parents alive?” The man replied: “Yes”. And then the Prophet reminded him of his duty stating “ Then, you should first ask for your parents’ approval”. (the Translation of Tajrid Sarih, VIII, 337).
6. Addressing them in gracious words. We should avoid any kind of speech or behavior which might hurt their feelings. As it is forbidden to do such behavior directly to them, it is also forbidden to cause people to address them in disgraceful words. Apart from God’s command: “ Do not say ‘Ugh!’ to them”, this hadith from the Prophet (pbuh) is also remarkable:
“It is one of the greatest sins that a man should curse his parents." It was asked (by the people), "O Allah's Apostle! How does a man curse his parents?" The Prophet said, "'The man abuses the father of another man and the latter abuses the father of the former and abuses his mother." (Bukhari, Adab, 4).
7. Remembering them with gratitude when they pass away and pray for them. Our responsibilities for our parents do not finish even if they pass away. We should keep their clean memories. What makes a human human in a sense is these nice emotions and memories which are inherited from generation to generation. Our Prophet’s (pbuh) statement “Love is obtained with inheritance” ( Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 22) indicates this reality. Thus, a connection of love is set between grandparents and grandchildren. Remembering them with gratitude and praying to Allah for their forgiveness is one of the prayers Allah teaches us in the Qur’an : “Our Lord! Forgive me, and my parents, and all the believers, on the Day on which the Reckoning will be established. " (the Qur’an, Ibrahim, 14:41)
When a companion who asked “What am I entitled to do for my parents after their death?”, the Prophet (pbuh) replied:
“Yes, there are four things ( that you should do):
“Remembering them with gratitude and praying to Allah for their forgiveness. Fulfilling their will if they have. Keeping in touch with their friends. Keeping in touch with relatives, your relatives exist only because of them.” (Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 19)
The Prophet (pbuh) explains how the prayers for a dead person are useful to them: “When people die, their book of record of their deeds is closed. Yet, these three things still bring them thawabs: Sadaqa al-Jariyah (continuous charity), knowledge that people can utilize and a child to remember them with gratitude and pray to Allah for them.” (Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 19)
Furthermore, treating them nicely in every way, abstaining from any bad kind of behavior is also our duties toward them.
Those who fulfill their duties for their parents when they are alive and when they die and who please them and receive their consent are the ones who attain the greatest bliss of the world and hereafter. It is because, the Prophet (pbuh) gives the good news that such people will have fertile and long lives and Allah will surely accept the prayers of their parents for them and they will attain Paradise.
The Prophet (pbuh) explains how important the duties of children for their parents are as follows:
“A child can never pay back the father’s right with any good deeds. However, he pays it back it if he finds him in a state of slavery and pays for him to free him”.(Bukhari, al-Adabu’l Mufrad, 6)
Loving our parents who have such a great amount of effort and right over us and not changing their love with any other things is one of the most important moral duties. This duty is fulfilled by showing respect, compassion and mercy for them and trying to please them. We should not forget that the true love for our parents is not just saying “ I love my parents” but this can be proved by fulfilling every moral and material duty for them.
In a hadith narrated from Burayd, a man performed circumambulation with his mother on his back to make her perform circumambulation around the Kaaba. He came to the Prophet (pbuh) and asked:
“-Did I pay her right back?” The Apostle of Allah replied:
“-No, not for the right of a single breath she took when she was pregnant with you”.
It is clear that this description full of compassion should make people thank their parents.
Abdullah b. Mas’ud (may Allah be pleased with him) asked the Prophet (pbuh):
“-Which deed is loved most by Allah?”
“-To perform prayers at their early (very first) stated times.”
Abdullah asked, "What is the next (in goodness)?"
The Prophet said, "To be good and dutiful to one's parents,"
Abdullah asked, "What is the next (in goodness)?"
The Prophet said, To participate in Jihad for Allah's Cause."
In summary, we should treat and serve our parents in every good way, fulfill their material needs, not even say “ugh!” to them, address them in gracious words, respond to them with the nicest behavior and attitudes, not make them upset and not show any kind of botheration to them. It is the children’s duty to abstain from words that can hurt their feelings, to try to receive their consent in any case, to make them pleased with them, to serve in every way when they grow old and to carry out their medical treatment in case of an illness. To serve them if they are ill or bedfast is a behavior which opens the door of Paradise.
12-)
What are the rights of a Muslim over other Muslims?
The bond that connects believing hearts in the strongest and deepest way is the bond of brotherhood originating from the principle of belief and taqwa. This is one of the best bounties granted to believers by Allah. This state is expressed as follows in a verse: "And hold fast, all together by the rope which Allah (stretches out for you), and be not divided among yourselves; and remember with gratitude Allah's favor on you; for ye were enemies and He joined your hearts in love so that by His Grace, ye became brethren; and ye were on the brink of the pit of fire, and He saved you from it. Thus doth Allah make his signs clear to you: that ye may be guided." (Aal-i Imran, 3/103)
In Islam, brotherhood is based on the basis of faith; therefore, all kinds of artificial discrimination and boasting that will destroy friendship among believers are regarded as haram. The criterion of taqwa replaced all kinds of values based on Jahiliyya like race, lineage and pedigree; thus, social brotherhood and harmony were ensured. The verse regarding the issue has the property to end all kinds of discussion: "... Verily the most honored of you in the sight of Allah is (he who is) the most righteous of you..." (al-Hujurat, 49/13).
The solidarity of believing men and women based on faith and taqwa is mentioned as a necessity of brotherhood. This solidarity is deemed necessary in order to make the principle of belief and taqwa dominant in individual and social life. As a matter of fact, it is stated that Allah will help the people who come together with this aim: "The Believers, men and women, are protectors one of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid what is evil: they observe regular prayers, practice regular charity, and obey Allah and His Messenger..." (at-Tawba, 9/71).
The Prophet (pbuh) states the following in a hadith: "None of you will have belief till he wishes for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself." (Bukhari, Iman, 7)
Hz. Ali (r.a) states the following: "Your real brother is the one that is together with you, that agrees to harm his own self just to avail you and that tries to help you when you are in trouble even if it is harmful for him."
Believers are like a perfect and sound building whose parts are interlocked in terms of friendship or like a single body whose elements and atoms are interconnected. When one organ of the body becomes ill, the whole body feels the same pain; similarly, when a believer, even if he is in a very remote part of the world, suffers, his other believing brothers feel it. The Prophet (pbuh) expresses this commitment of believers to one another as follows: "The commitment of a believer to another believer is like a building whose parts complement one another." It is stated that when Abu Musa al-Ash'ari narrated the hadith above, he clasped his hands with the fingers interlaced to describe it: "You see the believers as regards their being merciful among themselves and showing love among themselves and being kind, resembling one body, so that, if any part of the body is not well then the whole body shares the sleeplessness and fever with it." (see Bukhari, Salat, 88)
It is necessary for a believer to help his believing brother in any situation. The Prophet stated the following in a hadith:"Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or he is an oppressed one." When he was asked how to help whenhe is an oppressor, the Prophet said,"By preventing him from oppressing others. This is how to help him then." (Bukhari, Mazalim, 4; Muslim, Birr, 62)
According to what is reported from Hz. Ali (r.a.), the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) stated the following: "A Muslim has six rights over another Muslim. When he meets a Muslim, he greets him; when a Muslim invites him, he accepts his invitation; when a Muslim sneezes and says, 'alhamdulillah (praise be to Allah)', he says, 'yarhamukallah (may Allah have mercy on you)'; when a Muslim becomes ill, he visits him; when a Muslim dies, he takes part in his funeral; he loves for his Muslim brother what he loves for himself." (Darimi, Istidhan: 5; Ibn Majah, Janaiz: 43)
Note: We advise you to read the detailed explanations below regarding the issue:
Some verses regarding the issue and their explanations:
1. "…Whoever honors the sacred rites of Allah, for him it is good in the sight of his Lord…" (al-Hajj, 22/30)
What Allah orders us to honor are His decrees, orders and prohibitions He declares in the Quran. What is especially meant in the verse above are the essentials to be followed during hajj. They may be fard, wajib and sunnah. Those who learn, know and fulfill these essentials and who do them as a sign of respect to Allah will receive their rewards in the hereafter.
2. "…And whoever holds in honor the Symbols of Allah, (in the sacrifice of animals), such (honor) should come truly from piety of heart." (al-Hajj, 22/32)
What are meant by the symbols of Allah are the signs of the religion in general and in this verse in particular; they are the fards of hajj, the animals sacrificed during hajj and the places that need to be respected during hajj. They are the signs of Allah and the essentials that He wants to be respected. For, taqwa is respect to Allah; it is related to one's heart and its manifestations are seen in our life. The source of all kinds of good and bad deeds is primarily the heart.
3. "…Lower thy wing (in gentleness) to the Believers." (al-Hijr, 15/88)
The beginning of the verse is as follows: "Strain not thine eyes (wistfully) at what We have bestowed on certain classes of them, nor grieve over them." Worldly possessions are a means of boasting and pride for some people. However, it is quite a wrong attitude. For, the worldly possessions are temporal; they do not give man honor and superiority. It is the instruction of Allah to our Prophet (pbuh) to show compassion and mercy to believers and to act humbly. Believers are asked to show compassion and mercy to one another and to act humbly. The Quran and the Sunnah always encourage believers to do so.
4. "…If anyone slew a person―unless it be for murder or for spreading mischief in the land― it would be as if he slew the whole people: and if anyone saved a life it would be as if he saved the life of the whole people...” (al-Maida, 5/32)
A person who kills another person unjustly violates the most sacred right of a person, the right of living, and ignores the prohibition of shedding blood and inviolability of life. Thus, he causes blood to shed unjustly, blazes a bad trail, paves the way for others to shed blood and encourages others to do so. Therefore, a person who kills another person unjustly deserves Allah's wrath and punishment; he is not allowed to live and is executed. If it is not done, blood feuds increase in the community and everybody starts to realize his own justice. Consequently, the community is drifted into sedition and mischief; killings and taking revenge become widespread. Blazing such a trail leads the community to chaos and anarchy.
If a person lets another person live, forgives him or saves him from death, he is regarded to have saved everybody. Therefore, the religion of Islam gives great importance to human life and takes all measures to ensure it.
Some hadiths regarding the issue and their short explanations:
1. "A believer to another believer is like a building whose different parts enforce each other." The Prophet then clasped his hands with the fingers interlaced while saying that. (Bukhari, Salat 88, Mazalim 5; Muslim, Birr 65)
As we see in many hadiths, the Prophet (pbuh) draws analogies to explain some issues. In this hadiths, he likens the mutual assistance and solidarity of believers to the enforcement of the parts of a building. Such a building is sound and durable. Otherwise, it cannot stand; it collapses. If Muslims do not help one another, do not act together and are not tightly-knit, they will lose their strength, cannot stand and will collapse. As a matter of fact, the history of Islam is full of positive and negative examples of it.
It is not appropriate to deal with the concept of solidarity among believers in material aspect only. The material aspect is only one of the elements of solidarity. Spiritual brotherhood, friendship and sincerity, loving one another, showing mutual respect, showing respect to rights and law are basic elements that bring about material solidarity. The orders and prohibitions of the religion of Islam, worship, fards, certain prohibitions and harams are principles that enable this brotherhood and solidarity.
Muslims should go to all lengths in order to realize the structure whose properties we have mentioned above, establish organizations in accordance with the conditions of the time and place they live in and be like a strong building. Otherwise, it is impossible to practice Islam alone and to stand.
2. "When any one of you happens to go to the mosque or market with an arrow in his hand, he must grasp its pointed head so as not to hurt others." (Bukhari, Salat 66, Fitan 7; Muslim, Birr 120-124)
This hadith, which is reported with different words but the same meaning, teaches one of the rules of ethics and good manners to obey in places like mosques, markets and streets, where people are abundant. Accordingly, a Muslim should take necessary measures so as not to harm others, not to be harmed by others and not to disturb the peace in the community. Doing so is a necessity of showing respect to the rights of Muslims and not causing mischief and sedition.
The arrow was one of the weapons of that period. It has been replaced by pistols or rifles today. The reason why they are not allowed in certain places is because they may hurt people.
3. "As regards their being merciful among themselves and showing love among themselves and being kind, believers resemble one body When any part of the body is not well, the whole body shares the sleeplessness and fever with it." (Bukhari, Adab 27; Muslim, Birr 66)
From this hadith, we learn that believers need to help one another regarding high quality attributes like love, mercy and protecting one another. Accordingly, believers should love one another, show mercy and compassion to one another and help one another. For, Muslims and the ummah can attain salvation only through the people whose hearts and heads are filled with these feelings of virtue and who act upon these feelings. It is necessary to get rid of the disorders of lovelessness, mercilessness, cold-heartedness and coolness, which are contrary to those virtuous feelings. Believers are ordered to display a fully humanistic approach to not only believers but also the members of other religions or those who do not believe in any religion.
As the Prophet (pbuh) states in his wonderful analogy, the reason for sleeplessness is the pain felt in an organ of the body. Fever increases along with sleeplessness. Lack of love, mercy and compassion are like an illness that inflicts pain and burns man with fever. The word fever can also be used for malaria and all kinds of inflammatory diseases. Malaria is the hardest inflammatory disease and it hurts the body a lot. Therefore, the analogy of the Prophet (pbuh) is remarkable. A tiny wart on the finger gives pain to the whole body; similarly, the pain and agony of a believer anywhere in the world interests and disturbs us.
4 "Allah does not show mercy on a person who does not show mercy on others." (Bukhari, Adab 18, Tawhid 2; Muslim, Fadail 66)
This hadith includes all human beings. That is, to treat everybody, whether a believer or an unbeliever, justly and to show mercy to them are among the basic principles of our religion. For, man is the perfect and most superior living being that Allah created. He becomes lofty as he believes in Allah and loses his value as he disbelieves. Nevertheless, he needs to be treated humanely. A Muslim cannot be full of grudge, hatred and enmity against anybody. He treats everybody justly and keeps away from injustice. What lead him to this attitude are his belief and the values he gains through this belief. Our primary characteristic when we convey the universal message of Islam to others is having those values. The meaning expressed by mercy includes all living beings. On the Day of Judgment, when mercy is needed the most, Allah will not show mercy on those who do not show mercy on others by not acting in accordance with that hadith. Then, this hadith leads us to universal mercy.
5. "A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim; so, he does not oppress him, nor does he hand him over to an oppressor. Whoever fulfilled the needs of his brother, Allah will fulfill his needs; whoever brought his Muslim brother out of a discomfort, Allah will bring him out of the discomforts of the Day of Resurrection, and whoever screened a Muslim, Allah will screen him on the Day of Resurrection." (Bukhari, Mazalim 3; Muslim, Birr 58)
The following is stated in the Quran: "The Believers are but a single Brotherhood..." (al-Hujurat, 49/10) Muslims are brothers in terms of religion. Brotherhood of religion comes before the biological brotherhood.
It is not a wish but an order for a Muslim not to oppress his Muslim brother. For, oppression is haram. All kinds of injustice are oppression. It is also valid for dhimmis and members of various religions living under the guarantee of the Islamic state. In fact, the religion of Islam does not regard it permissible to inflict any oppression or injustice on anybody. However, the measures taken against those who oppress themselves and others and the penalties given to them cannot be regarded as oppression or injustice. Polytheism and unbelief are regarded as oppression. Islam does not allow people to remain in polytheism and unbelief to show polytheism and unbelief as legitimate and to spread them. Islam acts in accordance with the criteria ordered and imposed by Allah against them. It does not violate justice while doing so.
Not oppressing one's Muslim brother, which is especially mentioned here, is the order to obey the law of religious brotherhood and to fulfill the legal and ethical duties toward his Muslim brother and not to commit any injustice.
A Muslim does not hand his Muslim brother over to an enemy; does not abandon or endanger him. Ibn Battal, who explains hadiths, says it is fard al-kifayah to help an oppressed person for Muslims and fard al-ayn for the president of the state. A Muslim is a person who gives confidence and who is trusted. It is not permissible for him to sacrifice his Muslim brother for his personal interest or lustful desires and to do things against him. For, "A Muslim is the one who avoids harming Muslims with his tongue and hands." (Bukhari, Iman 4, 5) "None of you will have belief till he wishes for his Muslim brother what he likes for himself." (Bukhari, Iman 7)
Muslims do what is necessary in order to meet the needs of one another. For, people are in need of one another. These needs do not necessarily have to be material needs. Spiritual solidarity is as important as material solidarity.
The fact that Allah promises to meet the needs of a person who meets the needs of a Muslim proves that this deed is very meritorious. The Prophet (pbuh) said, "Allah helps a person as long as he helps his Muslim brother." (Muslim, Dhikr 37-38)
A person may encounter various problems, big or small, in daily life. Everything that distresses man is a problem. Muslims help one another to overcome their problems. They receive reward from Allah when they eliminate the problems of their brothers just like when they meet their needs. This reward is deserving the help of Allah on the Day of Judgment, when there will be no friend and helper except Allah. There cannot be greater happiness than this one for a Muslim. For, on that day, everybody will be in need of Allah's endless mercy. Those who do good deeds in the world will receive their reward on the Day of Judgment.
To screen the fault and mistake of a Muslim, to cover his body if he is needy, that is to clothe him, are among the greatest deeds in the eye of Allah. To screen the fault and mistake of a Muslim should not prevent one from advising and warning his Muslim brother in due form and secretly. Besides, this decree is related to the people who do not commit sins openly and in public. Those who commit sins and crimes openly and in public are excluded from this decree. For, to mention the crimes and sins of such people is not regarded as backbiting that is haram. Imam Nawawi states that those whose mistakes need to be screened are good people who are not notorious with their bad deeds. He says it is mustahab (recommended) to complain about the people who commit sins openly to the authorities if there is no risk of being harmed by them. To screen the crimes of such people will encourage them and they will commit more crimes. These decrees are related to a crime that was completed. It is wajib for a person to prevent a crime if he can when he sees a crime being committed.
6. "A Muslim is the brother of another Muslim. He does not betray his brother, lie to him and leave him unassisted. The chastity, property and blood of a Muslim are haram for another Muslim. This is where taqwa lies. It is enough as evil for a Muslim to despise his Muslim brother." (Tirmidhi, Birr 18)
This hadith is similar to the previous hadith in terms of its content. However, there are some additions to the characteristics that necessitate being brothers.
Betrayal is the opposite of trustworthiness. Betrayal means all kinds of injustice contrary to trust; it also means lack of trust and confidence. In fact, a Muslim is a person who does not betray what is entrusted to him. For, betraying something entrusted is a sign of hypocrisy (being a munafiq). A Muslim must not have a property of a hypocrite and must not lose his respectability due to it.
Telling lies is one of the bad characteristics forbidden by Islam. Our religion gives great importance to honesty and elevates honest people. Telling lies is an attribute of unbelievers and hypocrites (munafiqs).
It is haram for a Muslim to abandon his Muslim brother and not to help him. A Muslim cannot stop helping an oppressed person and preventing the oppression of an oppressor. For, they are the deeds that have to be done by Muslims to the extent that they can. Allah states the following: "…Help ye one another in righteousness and piety, but help ye not one another in sin and rancor..." (al-Maida, 5/2) Sins and enmity are regarded as oppression. When a person commits a sin, he oppresses himself; enmity eliminates friendship.
Islam guarantees man's security of life and property and the protection of his chastity and honor. These guarantees are ensured among Muslims first. However, the holiness of these rights for all human beings is accepted. In addition to them, Islam regards protecting the freedom of belief and minds of people as an essential. Therefore, it may be necessary to fight for the sake of protecting the life, property, chastity, honor, religion and mind. Those who are killed due to them are regarded as martyrs. For, they are all basic rights indispensable for individuals.
The reason why chastity, property and life are mentioned is the fact that they are essential and that the others come after them. For, the prohibition of violation of chastity, property and life is certain based on the Quran, the Sunnah and the consensus of scholars.
To despise and to look down on is one of the bad characteristics that do not fit a Muslim. For, it is pride and conceitedness. Conceitedness is one of the biggest sins in our religion. The Prophet (pbuh) said, "He who has in his heart the weight of a mustard seed of pride shall not enter Paradise." (Muslim, Iman 149) For, "Pride means denying the truth and violating people's rights." (Muslim, Iman 147)
A person who looks down on people and despises them cannot convey any message to them. For, a person who despises others loses his own respectability. Those who have no respectability cannot convey any message to people. A person who does not respect others is not respected. It is necessary for those who convey the religious message to have superior qualities. In a society where people who have no quality of conveying the message of the religion and who do not have proper relationships with others are in abundance, brotherhood and friendship decrease, the feeling of solidarity weakens, the concepts that are regarded as sacred start to disappear and it becomes almost impossible to see people who have taqwa.
7. "Do not hate one another, nor be jealous of one another; do not enter into a transaction when the other has already entered. Do not nurse enmity to one another; do not desert one another.) O servants of Allah! Be brothers. A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim. He does not wrong and oppress him; he does not stop helping him; he does not despise him. -The Prophet pointed at his chest three times and said, - Taqwa is here. It is enough for a Muslim as evil to despise his Muslim brother. The blood, property and honor of a Muslim are haram for another Muslim." (Muslim, Birr 32; see Bukhari, Adab 57; Abu Dawud, Adab 47; Tirmidhi, Birr 24)
The Prophet explained some of the bad characteristics that prevent being a good Muslim, religious brotherhood and friendship in this hadith. We also saw some of them in the previous hadiths.
Jealousy means to envy a bounty, rank or position, a superior quality that someone has and to wish that it will be removed from his Muslim brother. Jealousy is regarded as one of the primary evil and ugly characteristics in Islamic ethics and manners. The opposite of jealousy is admiration, which is a praised deed. It means to want to have the good deeds, bounties and virtues that a person has along with him. He does not want the other person to lose them or not to have them.
The reason why jealousy is rendered haram and is regarded as bad is because the objection and opposition of the jealous person is actually to Allah. For, it is Allah who gives man all kinds of bounties, ranks, positions, superiority and goodness. Then, to be jealous of and to envy the bounties a person has means to intervene in Allah's will. It will harm only the jealous person. The Prophet (pbuh) said envy and belief will not exist together in a person's heart. (Nasai, Jihad 8). Accordingly, envy cannot be an attribute of real believers. When the heart has such a spiritual illness, the value and reward of the other good deeds and charities will decrease or disappear. As a matter of fact, the Prophet (pbuh) said, "Doubtlessly, envy devours good deeds just as fire devours wood. (Abu Dawud, Adab 44; Ibn Majah, Zuhd 22)
Buying and selling, and commercial life are things that everybody has to be involved in somehow. For, man cannot produce all of his needs on his own. The things that man needs are produced by many people. Consequently, markets and bazaars are established. The religion of Islam has made arrangements that are beneficial for man in trade and business as it has done in all fields. The Prophet (pbuh) prohibited bidding for something that one would not buy and that he does not need just to increase the price of something in favor of the dealer or the customer and harming people by doing so. It is haram to cheat and deceive people. The Prophet states that the one who swindles is in Hell. (Bukhari, Buyu’ 60) In another hadith, he says, “He who deceives us is not one of us.” (Muslim, Iman 164; Abu Dawud, Buyu’ 50; Tirmidhi, Buyu’ 72) They are the basic rules that need to be obeyed in trade.
The word bughd means disliking, nurturing enmity through one's heart secretly against someone and hating. Bughd is one of the bad traits that prevent brotherhood and friendship among Muslims and that are not desired. A community whose individuals dislike one another and nurture enmity against one another, which is full of the feelings of hatred and grudge, will lose its business system, display unreliability and cannot serve as a model. However, the religion of Islam aims to form a community that consists of individuals with sound characteristics and high ethics. Lovelessness, grudge and hatred are among the primary causes that prevent the community that is aimed to be established from being formed. Therefore, it was disliked, condemned and forbidden by Allah and His Messenger.
If bughd is used for the consent of Allah, it is not objectionable. The Prophet (pbuh) says a person who loves something for Allah and dislikes something for Allah will make his belief perfect. (Abu Dawud, Sunnah 15; Tirmidhi, Qiyamah 60) It is a necessity of the love of Allah to dislike and hate those who commit harams, sins and things that Allah dislikes. Then, man has been given the free will to use the feelings and faculties granted to him in a good or bad way. That is why we are held responsible. Islam teaches us to develop our feelings and faculties and use them properly and trains us in this way; it does not teach us to weaken them.
One of the bad characteristics that our Prophet (pbuh) wants us to keep away from is to break the connection with other believers and to abandon them. Our religion forbids believers from drifting away from, abandoning and keeping away from one another in terms of talking, helping and taking care of one another. On the contrary, he always advises us to greet when we meet other believers, to see and talk to them frequently to continue going to the mosque and to empathize with them; he describes them as the most superior and valuable deeds. The Prophet (pbuh) does not regard it legitimate to be cross with somebody for more than three days unless there is a religiously valid excuse. They show that it is not permissible for believers to keep away from one another for random reasons and unjustifiable excuses.
It is not legitimate for a person to sell something to another person after promising to sell it to someone. It is not permissible for a dealer to offer to sell a customer something cheaper than another dealer after he has agreed to buy it by saying, "Give up that deal, I will sell the same thing cheaper to you.” For, deeds like that causes disagreements, arguments, resentment, offence, hatred and grudge among people.
8. “A person cannot be a real believer if he does not want for his believing brother what he wants for himself.” (Bukhari, Iman 7; Muslim, Iman 71-72; Tirmidhi, Qiyamah 59; Nasai, Iman 19, 33)
Belief is the product of love, love of Allah. To believe means to love the one that is believed in. For a believer, the one that deserves the most superior love is the most Supreme One. The most supreme one is Allah. All of the other loves of the believers depend on the love of Allah. A person who loves someone fulfills the wishes of his beloved one fully. If he does not do so, his love will not be sincere and convincing. A person who loves Allah obeys His orders and prohibitions fully.
This hadith shows how far away a real believer should be from egoism, the ambition to collect worldly goods and selfishness, how full he should be of altruism, sacrifice, charity, compassion and mercy. It is the cornerstone of forming a community of love towant for his believing brother what a person wants for himself. Another cornerstone for believers is to love one another. As a matter of fact, the Prophet (pbuh) confirmed this fact by saying, “You are not regarded to be real believers unless you love one another.” (Muslim, Iman 93)
9. “Five are the rights of a Muslim over his brother: responding to salutation, visiting the sick, joining the funeral, accepting his invitation, saying yarhamukallah when he sneezes.” (Bukhari, Janaiz 2; Muslim, Salam 4; Ibn Majah Janaiz 1)
Another narration is as follows: “Six are the rights of a Muslim over another Muslim. When you meet him, offer him greetings; when he invites you to a feast accept it; when he seeks your council give him; when he sneezes and says,"all praise be to Allah," you say yarhamukallah (may Allah show mercy on you); when he falls ill, visit him; and when he dies, take part in his funeral.” (Muslim, Salam 5 )
There are certain rights and duties of Muslims toward one another. These rights and duties can be related to material and spiritual fields. A person who has belief in the hereafter and believes that Allah knows everything he does and that he will be reckoned on the Day of Judgment for them will not wrong anybody and will not commit any crimes no matter where he is. Thus, the religion of Islam teaches its followers that they will be rewarded and punished in the hereafter for all of the good and bad deeds they do in the world; it tells us that a person who does not accept it cannot be a believer.
The rights mentioned here are primarily related to the spiritual dynamics of the community. For, none of them necessitates worldly penalties or sanctions if they are not done. However, the material dynamics of the Islamic community are also based on spiritual sensitivities. Each one mentioned here is one of the basic elements of being a good man, a good Muslim, keeping human relationships at the highest level, brotherhood, solidarity, sharing joy and sorrow and being a community of compassion and mercy.
Salam (greeting, salutation) is virtually a password for Muslims. The first word they utter when they meet one another is salam. The proverb “First greeting, then speaking” expresses this principle. It is sunnah to greet (to say as-salamu alaykum) and it is fard to respond to the greeting (to say wa alaykum as-salam). Allah states the following: “When a (courteous) greeting is offered you, meet it with a greeting still more courteous, (at least) of equal courtesy...” (an-Nisa, 4/86)
The shortest greeting is, “assalamu alaykum”. A better one is “assalamu alaykum wa rahmatullah” dır. It can be lengthened by adding “wa barakatuh”. However, it is enough to say“salamun alaykum”.
A person who is greeted responds by saying “wa alaykumussalam”. This is the shortest way of responding to greeting. It is possible to lengthen it when one responds. In that case, the following can be uttered: “wa alaykumussalam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuh” However, it is enough to respond as “alaykumsalam”. If a person is alone, it is fard for him to respond to the salutation. When a group of people is greeted, it is fard al-kifayah for one or some of them to respond to the salutation. Thus, the others will be relieved of the responsibility.
Greeting is the prayer and good wishes of believers to one another. It means “May you be under the protection of Allah” or “May peace be upon you and never leave you.”
Human beings can be ill and healthy. Not all humans are the same. Our religion gives great importance to health. However, man cannot always be healthy; he can be ill. Even prophets were exposed to various diseases. Therefore, Muslims regard illness as a test of Allah. There are various illnesses and every illness has various degrees.
When an ill person sees the people who were with him when he was fine, he becomes happy and cheers up; he understands that he has not been abandoned, that there is not a dangerous situation and that he will recover. Besides, his Muslim brothers pray for him and he prays together with them. Those who visit an ill person express their good wishes, advise him to be patient and utter words that will cheer him up. It is not appropriate to utter unsuitable words when one visits an ill person and to stay there for a long time
Death is the end that he will encounter in this world. It is not possible to escape and to get rid of death. The last duty of a Muslims toward one another is to join the funeral of a believer, to perform the janazah prayer and to go to the graveyard to bury him. This is the last duty toward the dead person and a righteous deed for his relatives. Muslims need to be together not only when they are happy but also when they are sad. Funeral is one of the most painful and exemplary moments. Death is the greatest advice and lesson. Therefore, joining the funeral is one of our duties toward our believing brothers. The duty of joining the funeral ends when one performs the janazah prayer but it is more virtuous to go to the grave and wait there until the dead body is buried.
To accept the invitation of one's Muslim brother and to go to the place where one is invited is one of the most important duties of Muslims. Islamic scholars agree unanimously that it is necessary and wajib to go to the marriage ceremonies when one is invited. It is sunnah or mustahab to join the invitations other than marriage ceremonies. However, it is not religiously permissible to go to the receptions, places, etc where harams and sins are committed.
The Prophet (pbuh) joined all of the invitations of the Companions. He did not make a discrimination based on the social status, richness and poverty. He did not like the invitations where the poor were not invited and he condemned the invitations where only the rich were invited. For, invitations need to bring together all of the believers, the rich and the poor, the young and the old; they are the places where acquaintanceship, love, compassion and mercy become manifest. That is probably why it is necessary to join the legitimate invitations.
The Prophet (pbuh) said:“To sneeze is of Allah and to yawn is of the devil.” (Tirmidhi, Adab 7) Sneezing is beneficial in terms of health because it makes the body fit and keeps the mind awake. On the other hand, yawning is regarded to be a sign of latency and laziness. Then, like all of the other bounties, it comes from Allah. To thank Allah for all of His bounties is one of the duties of a Muslim. Therefore, a person who sneezes says,“alhamdulillah (all praise be to Allah)”. A Muslim who hears that the person who has sneezed has praised Allah, he says “yarhamukallah”. It means “May Allah show mercy on you.” The person who has sneezed says to his Muslim brother who prayed for him, “yahdina wa yahdikumullah = May Allah guide us and you”. They all show that Muslims have certain rights and responsibilities toward one another even regarding small details. The Prophet (pbuh) stated the following:
“Allah likes the one who sneezes; He does not like the one who yawns. When one of you sneezes and says, “alhamdulillah", it is a religious necessity for the one who hears it to say, “yarhamukallah”. As for yawning, when you yawn, try to stop it as much as you can and not to say, "aah" by opening your mouth. For, it is of the devil and the devil laughs at the situation of this person.” (Tirmidhi, Adab 7)
That it is stated“A Muslim has six rights over another Muslim...” in a narration reported by Muslim does not indicate that there is a contradiction or disagreement among hadiths; it indicates that these rights are not only five or six. For, there are some other hadiths regarding rights and duties. The only difference in the second narration is the duty of “giving advice to a person who wants advice”. Advice is a term that includes all of the words and deeds that are beneficial for a person and that becomes a means of salvation for him.
In another narration, the right of “announcing when somebody finds something" is mentioned. Accordingly, it is necessary to announce in public in a way that everybody can hear and understand when somebody finds something; if the owner cannot be found, it is necessary to hand it over to the authorities.
Some decrees inferred from the verses, hadiths and explanations:
- Believers need to help one another materially and spiritually; they need to form togetherness like the stones and bricks of a building that are interlocked.
- It is not possible to practice Islam individually and to make others practice it. Individuals cannot resist external pressures inflicted on them. It is necessary to act together and in unity in order to resist pressure and violence.
- It is necessary not to go to the places where there are a lot of people with guns and similar weapons that can kill and wound others; if people come with weapons, it is necessary to take necessary measures.
- It is necessary to do things that will give Muslims peace and to show them compassion and mercy.
- It is necessary to avoid deeds that will cause sedition and mischief among Muslims.
- The Islamic community is like one single body; when one organ of the body gets ill, the whole body feels ill; similarly, the misfortune that hits a Muslim should make all Muslims worried.
- In the hereafter, Allah will not show mercy on those who do not show mercy on other people.
- Oppression and all kinds of wrongs are haram.
- A Muslim must not surrender his Muslim brother to the enemy; he must not endanger his Muslim brother.
- It is a duty of brotherhood to meet the needs of one another and to screen their faults and mistakes. Allah will reward those who do so.
- The life, property and chastity of a Muslim are haram for other Muslims; it is haram to violate them.
- It is among major sins to despise and contempt others.
- It is haram to be jealous of others. A person who is jealous of others is regarded to object to Allah because it is Allah who gives the bounties that are envied.
- It is haram to increase the price of something by pretending to be willing to buy it. Such an act means increasing prices, cheating and oppressing people.
- If Bughd, grudge, hatred and being cross with a person are not for the sake of Allah, they are haram.
- It is not permissible for Muslims to keep away from one another, to stop helping one another and to break relationships.
- It is haram for a dealer to annul the sale of another dealer by saying that he will sell the same thing cheaper or something better for the same price.
- A person cannot be a real believer if he does not want for others what he wants for himself.
- What a person wants for his believing brother should be nice and good things.
- Each right necessitates a responsibility. Those who do not fulfill their responsibilities are held responsible. This responsibility can be related to both this world and the hereafter.
- It is sunnah to greet (to say as-salamu alaykum) and it is fard to respond to the greeting (to say wa alaykum as-salam).
- It is sunnah to visit ill people. It is necessary to act in accordance with the manners of visiting ill people.
- In a funeral, it is fard al-kifayah to perform the janazah prayer and to go to the graveyard for the burial; the other deeds and services are sunnah.
- It is wajib to go to a wedding ceremony held within legitimate boundaries; it is sunnah or mustahab to go to other legitimate receptions.
- It is a religious necessity to say “yarhamukallah” when someone sneezes and says “alhamdulillah".
- It is a religious duty to give advice to a person who wants and who needs for those who can.
Reference: Summarized from the book “Riyâzü’s-Sâlihîn: Peygamberimizden Hayat Ölçüleri” Translation and Explanation Vol 2, Erkam Publications.
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Can we gain thawabs by imagining good things?
Yes, you will gain thawabs because of imagining good things sincerely because, the intention of a believer is more important than his actions. He gains thawabs for his good thoughts that he cannot perform.
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repentance
Allah forgives the past sins of those who convert to Islam and repent sincerly. We advise you to make amends for all that has past if you have rightful due.
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Abortion in Islamic Law
People are encouraged to have children in the hadiths having the meaning “The auspicious of your women is the one who is capable to have children”. “ The child’s odour is from the Heaven’s odour” and “Favourable child is heavenly light in the world, and joy in the hereafter.”
Giving so much importance to this subject, our religion protects the child in the uterus till the child is born and burdens some responsibilities to the parents. It doesn’t’ permit to terminate the existence of the child in the uterus called “fetus” by propounding arbitrary and fictitious reasons although there is no real reason. It considers the ones performing such a crime as “murderers”. Because, “the fetus” is counted as a human being.
As a fetus is considered as a human being after it is animated; having a miscarriage, that is, having an “abortion” in medicine terminology is like killing an adult person. If the fetus isn’t animate yet, since having an abortion in this case is deemed as preventing an innocent from coming into the world, then again it implies a serious responsibility. The late Umar Nasuhi describes the women making such a mistake to maintain their beauties like that:
“The women commiting such a murder for the desire to protect the beauty and freshness granted to them in the pure youth age are the ones with a brutish-nature. Doesn’t such a hardhearted mother have a lower essence than a wild beast eating her infant while it is alive?
Sentencing the ones committing abortion to the punishment of “reproving”, the Islamic Law takes preventive measures as far as possible. However, it also points out the permissible aspect of abortion and the course of action when abortion relies on a real reason.
We can summarize the matter in this way by taking the Dictionary of the Islamic Jurisprudence Terminology (Istılahat-ı Fikhiyye Kamusu) as a basis:
Aborting a fetus isn’t counted as a murder and it doesn’t entail any physical or spiritual responsibilities if there is a certain excuse or necessity. That is:
Because of a sanitary reason that affects his mother’s health, a fetus whose limbs can not be recognized yet can be aborted as a result of a medical inspection, examination and diagnosis.
There is also such an explanation:
If a woman becomes pregnant while she has a sucking baby, and meanwhile if her suck lessens gradually and her baby gets hungry because of the deficiency of suck, and if the family doesn’t have the opportunity to employ a foster mother and the baby will become sick and will die, then it is permissible to have a miscarriage. Because, in this case, the fetus isn’t counted as a formed human being but a bit of flesh or a blood-clot. However, the born baby in arms is a living human. In this respect, there is no drawback in having an abortion to protect the living baby. (Dictionary of the Islamic Jurisprudence Terminology, 3: 145-149.)
Applying any kinds of methods to prevent pregnancy without giving any harm to the woman is permissible. But this method mustn’t terminate the insemination evermore. But if a fetus has come into existence, it is not the same case. According to Ghazali and many of the Maliki scholars, committing abortion without a serious excuse is religiously forbidden (haram) even if occurs in the first days of the fetus.
According to some Islamic jurists, abortion is permissible before 42 days pass over the fetus. We say 42 days because according to the rumor of Muslim, after 42 days pass over the sperm (nutfe), Almighty Allah sends an angel to it, He gives a shape to it and He begins to form its ears and eyes. In short, after 42 days pass over the fetus, it gets into a shaping progress and so interfering in it isn’t permitted. (Halil Gönenç, Fatwas for The Current Matters II. 326.)
After that period, having an abortion isn’t permitted. Because, a fetus having partially recognizable limbs is counted as a human being. To abort such a fetus is the same as killing a living person.
Besides the permission discussed above, especially now, children can be nourished without being in the need of suck. Therefore, if the child can eat baby food and his family is able to afford these expenses, it is convenient not to commit an abortion. But if the child gets sick and becomes thinner and also has a vital danger when he is weaned, then the permission discussed above can be used of. But every family must take into account its own opportunities and conditions before making use of the judgment above.
Moreover, parents can take less dangerous precautions like removal and birth control methods till their child is weaned so that there will be no need to unwanted methods like abortion.
16-)
How must be the way of dressing of a Muslim woman?
For the answer, please click on the link given below.
There aren't any information about talking while having a bath in hadith or Fiqh books (Islamic jurisprudence) but we should not talk while bathing; we should not sing songs including Allah’s names or holy things and should not read verses from the Quran.
Testimony is something general, and there are not different testimonies for marriage, business or cases requiring punishment, etc. In all of those incidences, there should be common characteristics of the person who will testify. Let us summarize the qualifications necessary the person who will testify according to the Islamic Law:
The first requirement is that the testifier must be fair. A fair person is the one whose good deeds are superior to his wrongdoings. This quality becomes evident through keeping away from great sins and not insisting on small sins. A person who commits great sins is called depraved (fasiq). In the 6th verse of Chapter al-Hujurat, it is obviously stated that the testimony of such a person is not accepted: O ye who believe! If a wicked person comes to you with any news, ascertain the truth, lest you harm people unwittingly and afterwards become full of repentance for what you have done.
People who commit the greatest sins do not mind telling lies. Since people who defraud orphan of their rights, are known as charging interest, drink alcohol continuously, gamble and who commit similar sins do not respect laws and tell lies easily, their testimony is not accepted.
The testimony of people who are known as liars and tell lies frequently is not referred to.
There should not be a worldly animosity between the defendant and the testifier.
The testimony of people who are famous with meanness, areknown as close-fisted on giving zakat (alms) and meeting the needs of their family is not accepted. They may bear false witness. The testimony of insane, senile, dumb and blind people is not accepted.
The testimony of saucy people, who do not mind whether what they say is licit or illicit, who are used to uttering phrases that are not considered decent in terms of religion and ethics is not accepted.
Imam Abu Yusuf, who acted sensitively in the issue of testimony and who was one of the establishers of Hanefi School, also performed as qadi (Muslim judge) in Abbasids period. He heard many cases appealed. He never granted privilege even to governors who had high ranks and treated everybody fairly.
Imam Abu Yusuf had rejected the testimony of Fadil, who was one of the viziers of the Caliph. He gave this following answer to people who asked what the reason was: This vizier had described himself as your slave when addressing the Caliph. If he told the truth, the testimony of a slave is not accepted. If he lied; the testimony of a liar is not accepted either.
That incidence shows the dignity of Islamic discipline, the nonexistence of flattery in Islam and the importance of personality and character.
The testimony of people who do deeds that contradict general manners, the blessed conducts and practices of the Prophet (PBUH), and customs of the community is not acceptes. Conversing with shameless people, making fun of people, playing humiliating jokes on people are all deeds that are contrary to the conducts of the Prophet (PBUH) and ethics. The testimony of people who habitually practice those deeds is not accepted.
The testimony of the people of bidah (religious innovation) who malign the righteous ones of the first generations of Islam like Imam Azam (Abu Hanifa) and Companions of the Prophet (PBUH) is not accepted.
All of those manifest the importance Islam gives to the issue of testimony that assists the realization of justice.
Reference: Mehmet Paksu- Çağın Getirdiği Sorular
20-)
What are the limits for an engaged girl and boy to tell each other their desires?
Engagement is not a marriage agreement, but it is a marriage promise. For this reason, those who are engaged are regarded as namahram (not a close relative) for each other and they cannot be together unless there is a mahram (so closely related by blood that marriage with him/her is forbidden) person with them. For this reason, even if they are engaged, it is not permissible for them to be together, to look at the parts of their bodies which are haram (forbidden) to look at and touch each other. And they should pay attention to their talk. The engaged people have to be careful when they talk to each other on the phone, through msn etc... For example, if they talk about love, affection, backbiting, lies, and about anything that arouses sexual desires, it is definitely not right. However, if it is about religious matters that remind Allah, death, hereafter and religious feelings and thoughts, certainly it cannot be said that it is forbidden. The criterion should be as mentioned. When you act in accordance with those criteria, we can say that you do not commit sins and you protect yourselves. Also, we advise you to ask your conscience about what you do. If your conscience is not comfortable, give up what you are doing.
21-)
What should we do if someone near/with us is being mocked at?
It is impermissible to mock at someone, either face to face or in his absence. The Quranic verse says: “Woe to every (kind of) scandal-monger and backbiter, who pileth up wealth and layeth it by thinking that his wealth would make him last for ever! By no means! He will be sure to be thrown into that which Breaks to Pieces…” (al-Humaza, 1-4). If we can, we must silence the mocker. If we cannot, we should show our discontent and leave the place.
22-)
What is Conscience?
Conscience: “Losing oneself. Feeling. To feel.” “Spiritual feeling that enables one to distinguish the good from the bad and enjoy being good and be disturbed by bad and evil.”
Conscience: The most advanced source of knowledge for human soul. Once it says “yes” to something, neither mind nor sense organs can deny it.
Conscience, mind and five sense organs; all of them provide human beings with different things and open doors to different realities. Yet, conscience is always superior to others; mind follows it and then come five sense organs at the end.
Once the true mind finds a reality, it does not matter if five sense organs do not agree. The best example of this is that although mind says the earth rotates, senses deny it. Eventually, mind won and decision was made according to it.
The mind is to conscience what sense is to mind when they are compared. One cannot behave according to a mind which disagrees with conscience. If we know a reality in our conscience, all intellectual proofs put forward against it are nothing but demagogy.
For instance, if we feel pain in our conscience because of an unfairness we have done, none of the excuses that our mind has got to offer can justify it.
Man knows lots of realities with his conscience. Knowing with conscience is as different from knowing with mind as seeing is from hearing. There is not comparison, reasoning, suggesting opinions or establishing hypotheses in conscience. It knows realities directly without needing any of these. Although we distinguish green from blue with our eyes, we distinguish between affection and love or between fear and worry with our conscience.
Man knows his own existence with his conscience, too. He does not need to ponder over it and ask a question such as “Do I exist or not?” and eventually put forward proofs such as “I think, therefore I am.” Man knows his attributions with his conscience, too, like his existence. He knows that he is alive; he is knowledgeable and has got self-control and ability to see and hear, all with his conscience. He can never doubt it.
One may not believe his eyes and say “Have I seen it right?” and rub his eyes to look again. Similarly, one may not believe in his mind, either and read again saying “Have I understood it wrong?” However, he does not ever doubt his conscience and what it knows.
We stated that “man knows his own existence with his conscience.” Similarly, he knows, with his conscience again, that he did not create his own body; he did not place his organs in proper places in body with his initiation and power. He knows this for so sure that he does not ever think of anything reverse even though he has lived for ages. Actually, knowledge of conscience depends on self-experience rather than concrete knowledge and feeling.
Man who knows with his conscience that he did not make his own body knows with his mind that this is the same about other beings. So, a movement of belief that starts in conscience develops with the help of mind and sense organs. And this leads man to Allah, the only owner of all things.
Yes, every conscience knows Allah. Imagine a man who does not believe. This man is not grateful for a fruit that he has eaten to nature, to material or to anything else. Besides not being grateful to Allah, he is not grateful to anyone else. What prevents him from being grateful to others is his conscience. Than unbelieving man knows with his conscience that neither this universe nor gardens and fields made of it can have these bounties. They did not have them with their own power. They are only tools, factories and workbenches. It is against human dignity to be grateful to them.
All of these meanings are present in his conscience, without words and in such a form that we cannot comprehend. And it does not let him to be grateful to others. However, that conscience is so veiled by sins, rebel, wrong beliefs and false instilling that it has got no power to make its owner be grateful to Allah. Yet, all it can do is to prevent its owner from being grateful to others. And that person, as a result, eats without giving thanks, sees without contemplation and lives without thinking. And he is drowned in worldly affairs, worldly problems or delights. He leads an animal’s life without a moment of thinking why he was sent down to this world, what his duty is and where he is going to, and then passes away from this world.
Another example: If one can sleep peacefully when he lies in his bed, it is because his conscience knows Allah. You cannot see a person who sits in bed, hesitant to fall asleep, saying “I will sleep but what if our Earth crashes into another planet? What if a star crashes into our Earth...?” Or a person who changes his mind and decides not to sleep thinking “I will sleep, but what if arteries get blocked, what if my blood coagulates, what if my heart stops beating…?” Everyone knows with their conscience that neither their bodies not this universe are their possessions. Whatever happens in both of them are results of Allah’s creating.
If it was not for this cognition of conscience, no any unbeliever could breathe peacefully on this world. However, they cannot take the advantage of this safety, this safety atmosphere that their conscience, provides them with properly and cannot find Allah.
Another example: If you point out to a soldier’s weapon and ask “Is this yours?”, he would say “Yes.” Yet, the same soldier knows with his conscience that the weapon is not his personal possession. He cannot use it as he wishes and cannot sell it. And just like this soldier, when we say “My hand, my eyes…”,we know with our conscience that we are not the true possessors of them and they were entrusted to us. However, if this cognition of conscience does not result in belief, people will use all these things entrusted to him the way with which Allah – the true possessor of them - is not pleased, all their lives; - to give account for them all one by one on the day of accounting…
Shortly: Every conscience says “Allah exists”; neither man is a stray vagabond, nor this universe is a masterless factory… There is One who weaves man on this workbench…
And man belongs to Him, with his all existence…
23-)
Unintentionally passing a disease that kills someone else
He is not considered as a killer in respect of the penalty provisions, but he commits sin and becomes responsible.
24-)
Why does Allah command people
Here is the painful scream of an eighteen-year-old boy: “Dear brother. I am writing this mail with my eyes full of tears. One of my teachers used to tell me to take Joseph (pbuh) as a model. However, I could not be as obedient as he was to God. I betrayed my eyes. I made them dirty. I regret so much. Now I am trying to clean this dirt with my tears. I request you to pray for me. May God save today’s Josephs for the sake of Joseph (pbuh).”
The Qur’an reminds us that the creator of the universe and the creator of man in this universe and the one who bestows “eyes to see” is Allah and It calls to us: ”They should restrain their gaze” ( the Qur’an, an-Nur, 24:30). The One Who gives this command is the creator of man with this nature. Who else can know better than Allah, the most natural and suitable state for man? Who can speak a word over the One Who bestows this nature?
The Sublime Creator invites us to the state which is the necessity of our nature, with this command of His. Not restraining the gaze from forbidden, gazing at whatever one sees is something that conflicts with the nature the Divine wisdom deemed appropriate because it makes one single emotion rule over the infinite emotions bestowed upon man. It leaves the will inoperative. It causes personalities which focus their world and their thought on a single point.
Gazing at haram is caused by a weakness of belief and it feeds this weakness; besides, it has a feature which degrades people in humanity. It is because it makes people who are equipped with emotions and abilities whereby they can surround the universe slaves for lustful desires and emotions; and it shows the opposite sex as if they were only sexual objects. It reduces the description of man to this simple and absurd state.
In addition, a meaningful side of the command “restrain the gaze from haram” is its commanding an internal endeavor. The first word for both believing men and women is not “destroy harams which you may gaze at” but “restrain your gaze”.
This is a meaningful reflection of the general approach of the Qur’an which gives the priority to man and which undoes the tie in individuals because, the root of the problem is not in the outer world but inside us. A person whose inner world and whose fortress of belief is strong does not deviate even if the whole world is full of forbidden images and scenes.
As a matter of fact, the parable of Joseph (pbuh) is an example for this. Against a very beautiful woman who offered herself with all the charms she had, Joseph’s reaction was to turn his gaze away. Joseph (pbuh) gives this lesson to humanity: If people know the Owner of their eyes and His commands correctly, they are not tempted by the most tempting scenes.
As eyes see…
The most critical point in all the lustful things is approaching it. Once the threshold is passed, the rest comes easily and quickly. For example, eyes which gaze at bare legs are not satisfied with that and they seek for more because in thresholds like not restraining the gaze from haram, there is an evil gravity which inactivates the will and which pulls man to the lowest level of sin even if he does not want it in his heart and conscience.
Generalization of a specific shame comes into existence by means of seeing. With eyes seeing, the wrong becomes the rule and what is abnormal becomes normal. This command of restraining the gaze addressing both men and women ceases this general degeneration right from the beginning.( Metin Karabasoglu)
The 30th and 31st verses of the surah an-Nur in the Qur’an, presents us an enlightened way based on conscious believing against the delusion of obscenity which damages many believing hearts. Our Lord commands:
“(O, My Messenger), Tell the believing men that they should restrain their gaze (from looking at the women whom it is lawful for them to marry, and from others' private parts), and guard their private parts and chastity. This is what is purer for them. God is fully aware of all that they do. And tell the believing women that they (also) should restrain their gaze (from looking at the men whom it is lawful for them to marry, and from others' private parts), and guard their private parts, and that they should not display their charms except that which is revealed of itself; and let them draw their veils over their bosoms.” ( the Qur’an, an-Nur, 24:30-31)
The verses above informs all Muslims either men or women that unlawful sexual relationship is forbidden. Also, both men and women are commanded to restrain from actions which may lead them to an unlawful sexual relationship. Furthermore, we learn that one of the most important things that lead people to unlawful relationships is gazing at haram. Stating in a hadith “the fornication of the eyes is gazing lustfully”(Bukhari, Istizan,12), the Prophet (pbuh), describes gazing at haram as the fornication of the eyes.
Depending on the verses mentioned above and hadiths regarding the issue, scholars of Islam are in an agreement on the matter that lustful gazing of both men and women at haram save for their husbands and wives is forbidden. Necessary gazing in situations like medical treatment, witnessing or marital purposes is permitted within the conditions and measures stated in the Islamic Jurisprudence.
It all begins with a “gaze”
Gazing at haram is the beginning of fornication. For this reason, it is important to restrain our gazes. Those who are careless by saying “What could happen with a single gaze?” end up with great destruction.
People are not held responsible for the first indeliberate gaze. However, repeating the gaze is forbidden. The Prophet says to Ali “ O, Ali! Do not add another gaze over a gaze. The first is for you but the second is against you.” ( Tirmidhi, Manners, 28)
However, we should state this right away : This first gaze is the one which a person needs to look when in marketplace or on a street, which his eyes encounter unwillingly. Since man cannot walk with his eyes shut, gazing for necessary issues, indeliberate but necessary situations and situations in which he is unwillingly need to look at is considered to be the first gaze. This case, is especially in question in the Era of Bliss.
However, gazing with consideration that “ the first gaze is permissible” like monitoring all around is wrong because, today a case like encountering suddenly and unawarely is not in question; we may encounter forbidden scenes anywhere anytime. For this reason, we should take control of our gaze.
God commands “ do not draw near to any unlawful sexual intercourse”, not “ do not commit it”
In Islam, there are prohibiting decrees regarding weaknesses and habits which lead people to evil deeds. Those who obey these decrees can save their life in the hereafter as well as in the world. They protect themselves and their children against the negative habits which are getting commoner. We should listen to the warning of our Lord: “Do not draw near to any unlawful sexual intercourse; surely it is a shameful, indecent thing, and an evil way (leading to individual and social corruption).” (the Qur’an, al-Isra’, 17:32)
God commands “ do not draw near to any unlawful sexual intercourse”, not “ do not commit it”. For this reason, gazing at tempting and stimulating scenes which might be a leading or and invitation to an illicit relationship is not permissible in our religion because the main issue is not to draw near. If you do not approach it, it will be easier for you to be saved from it. It becomes difficult to endure the stages after approaching; a person who approaches the fire may fall into it.
Eyes should restrain the gaze from the obscenity so that imagination will remain clean and minds will be protected from being polluted. Great scholars: “ People should not only shut their eyes of their minds and only avoid but they should also not let forbidden images into their minds; imagination should be protected as well.”
Why is “not gazing at haram” insisted so much?
Because all the sins and moral corruption begin with gazing at the obscenity, develop due to insisting on it and turn to active sins.
Moreover, eyes take the picture of what they see and they store it in their archives of imagination. No matter where they go and where they are, these pictures they have taken are in front of the eyes of their minds.
The student becomes unable to study his lesson, workers cannot do their jobs and intellectual people cannot come to their minds to think clearly; and in every matter people can have a drawback and a decrease. In order to protect people from this state, religion has prescribed rules against obscenity and saves the believers from such degradation.
According to Islam, taking photos or filming a video which exceeds the bounds of nudity whether they aim at temptation or not, is forbidden. Looking at such images or videos and marketing them is forbidden as well.
They are forbidden because direct nudity and nudity by means of images and videos fundamentally aims at the same illicit purpose. It only differs in effect. Direct nudity is more effective than indirect one. However, indirect nudity has continuality and commonness.
We should not limit nude pictures to only those of women. There is not such a thing that looking at the nude images of a woman is sin whereas looking at those of a man is not. Displaying private parts and gazing at them is forbidden and sin whoever is in the picture. However, being forbidden and sins increase and become strong by getting close to the most private parts.
Is gazing at the beauty rightful or a betrayal of the eyes?
What is beautiful, who is the beautiful, according to whom is it beautiful and for whom is it beautiful? Is the beauty the object that the soul like? Or, is beauty the thing the heart acquires through a pure mind and knowledge? We should deal with the question in the title in accordance with these questions.
The first one of them is the beauty according to the soul which suggests evilness and the second is the one according to the heart. In the first one, the soul looks at the beauty it sees on its own behalf and uglifies it. And in the second one, the heart looks at it on the behalf of Allah and makes it more beautiful.
In the first one, the starting point of the soul is its own view; its intentions and sight are its own pleasures and infinite desires. Here, the eyes are reduced to an instrument of temptation. There is no goodness in this look. This look is thankless and ungrateful and that is why it is forbidden. No matter if non-mahram is covered or uncovered, beautiful or ugly; looking at it on the behalf of the soul is forbidden.
In the second one, the starting point of the heart, its intention and sight is to reach Allah’s infinite beauty; the deed it does is knowledge, skill and thanking. Its purpose is to gain Allah’s consent. According to Badiuzzaman, if people sell the eye to your All-Seeing Maker, and employ it on His behalf and within limits traced out by Him, then your eye will rise to the rank of a reader of the Great Book of Being, a witness to the miracles of Dominical art, a blessed bee sucking on the blossoms of Mercy in the garden of this globe.(Words, 6th Word)
In this second approach, everything is beautiful. In this sight, blessing is nice as well as grief. Peace is fine as well as trouble. The eye says “He makes excellent everything He creates” (he Qur’an, as-Sajdah, 32:7) like the Qur’an and it seeks His manifestation in everything and finds beauty. He observes Allah’s holy names and attributions in happiness and peace.
In this sight, the heart says like Badiuzzaman “In respect of reality and the face that looks to their Creator, everything is transparent and beautiful” (Words, 22nd Word), and it collects the honey of knowledge, talent and thankfulness from the manifestations of Allah’s names. The heart, in this sight says “Let us see what God does, whatever He does, He does it beautifully” like Ibrahim Hakki and surrenders to God’s deeds.
Gazing at non-mahram on behalf of the soul is not rightful but sin. Looking at the beauty of one’s spouse or looking at the beauties of creation, inborn nature and nature which is not forbidden to look at on behalf of the Creator is rightful.
The Qur’an describes this forbidden gaze as “treacheries of the eyes”. God says: “God knows the treacheries of the eyes and all that the bosoms conceal.” (the Qur’an, al-Mumin, 40:19)
The expression of “treacheries of eyes” means slipping of the eyes to haram secretly, in the Qur’an’s unique language. Here, the despotic soul uses eyes which are divine miracles on its behalf, leading these two pearls to haram.
However, Allah sees the slipping of the eyes to haram. The despotic soul does not consider that or it forgets that Allah sees what the eyes see. The Qur’an describes it as “ treacheries of the eyes”.
What does the religion say about gazing at the obscenity?
Gazing at obscene images, watching obscene movies and entering the sites which contain such content is forbidden. The Qur’an states clearly that prostitution and fornication are forbidden, using the expression of “indecent, shameful deeds” in two places and using clearly the expression of “illicit sexual relationship”,.
“Say: "Come, let me recite what your Lord has made unlawful for you: that you associate nothing with Him; and (do not offend against but, rather) treat your parents in the best way possible; and that you do not kill your children for fear of poverty – it is We Who provide for you as well as for them; and that you do not draw near to any shameful thing (like fornication, fornication, and homosexuality), whether committed openly or secretly; and that you do not kill any soul, which God has made sacred and forbidden, except in just cause. All this He has enjoined upon you, that you may use your reason (and so believe, know right from wrong, and follow His way).” (the Qur’an, al-An’am, 6:151)
“Say: "My Lord has made unlawful only indecent, shameful deeds (like fornication, fornication, prostitution, and homosexuality), whether those of them that are apparent and committed openly or those that are committed secretly; and any act explicitly sinful; and insolence and offenses (against the Religion, life, personal property, others' chastity, and mental and bodily health), which is openly unjustified; and (it is also forbidden) that you associate partners with God, for which He has sent no authority at all, and that you speak against God the things about which you have no sure knowledge.” ( the Qur’an, al-A’raf, 7:33)
Indecent, shameful deeds mentioned in the verse, are fornication whether they are houses of ill-fame, mistress, secret bedmate, etc. Such secret deeds are the name for all of the things which lead people to unlawful relationships. Both fornication and things that lead people to such relationships, and things which stimulate lustful emotions illicitly are forbidden.
As a matter of fact, numerous scholars of Islamic Jurisprudence since the beginning of Islamic history have dealt this issue in this way. The usage of the plural form of the word fuhush (prostitution) as fawahish (indecent, shameful deeds) shows that there are plenty of ways which lead to illicit relationships.
And the third verse is : “Do not draw near to any unlawful sexual intercourse; surely it is a shameful, indecent thing, and an evil way (leading to individual and social corruption). ( the Qur’an, al-Isra’, 17:32)
Considering it carefully, the assumption anyone can make is the fact that not only unlawful sexual intercourse but also drawing near to it is forbidden. This is to emphasize once more the fact that things that lead to such intercourse are also forbidden along with the intercourse itself.
When we examine the hadiths, we see that the Messenger of Allah indicates that gazing at the obscene images is forbidden and even if people are not held responsible for the first gaze since it is unwilling, the second gaze and the next gazes are forbidden. (Tirmidhi, Manners, 28)
In a sacred hadith, it is stated that gazing at the forbidden is like a poisonous arrow of satan; if people avoid this, God will make them taste the belief in the depths of their heart due to their attitude. (Munziri, at-Targhib wa’t-Tarhib, III:63)
Another hadith is more general: “There is no doubt that Allah has written for man his share of fornication which he will commit inevitably. The fornication of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the fornication of the tongue is the talk, and of the soul wishes and desires; and the private parts testify or deny it." (Bukhari, Asking Permission, VIII:74:260)
There are the following additions in a different narration of this hadith : “The fornication of the hand is holding and touching, the fornication of the feet is to walk (to the place) where he intends to commit fornication the fornication of the tongue is, kissing the fornication of the ears is listening.” ( Muslim, Destiny, Book 33, 6422)
Why is gazing at the obscene fornication?
Acting upon what has been told thus far, people who weaknesses regarding sexuality and who seek different forms of satisfaction may ask “What is wrong with such gazing unless an illicit sexual intercourse is committed; what is the point of these harsh commands?”. Or, they might ask “ Why is the Qur’anic approach to fornication and sexuality so harsh?”
The answer is this: First of all, the family is, as a common expression says, the base of the community. If the base moves, it means the complete building is to quake. It is not possible for a family and a community live in peace and happiness if either spouse has an apparent or secret illicit relationship; the secrecy will be apparent sooner or later.
Secondly, as is or should be known, if Islam states a decree about whether an action should or should not be done, it also provides decrees and regulations which support and set the ground for it or to preserve it.
Thus, on the matter of encouraging people to get married, Islam provides direct commands and prohibitions regarding the issues of equality of the couples who are to get married, their meeting before marriage, their compliance with all sorts of cleansing, not doing things which the spouse dislikes, not allowing strangers in the house without the permission of the husband and so on. Islam has forbidden things that will lead to fornication when it has forbidden fornication.
For instance, Islam forbids men and women from dressing in a form which displays their sexual attractiveness, their adornment and from going out in public in this state, obscenity, immodesty, lustful touching and gazing of people who are not married couples and so forth.
It deals this issue in such a detailed way that women are limited in their adornment, wearing scent, tempting gazing and speech and levity since they all contribute to other people’s seduction. Watching obscene movies, surfing through the websites which address human’s sense of lust are also forbidden.
Thirdly, judging the issue with respect to social aspects, it is the duty of a government to establish social order in accordance with principles of public morality; it is also the right of a community which asks for a healthy life.
It is certain that fornication, opinions and executions which stimulate all sorts of lustful emotions, notably obscenity which lead people to fornication and which permit such emotions describing them as sexual liberty despite human nature and without setting limitations are against the principles of public morality and they will definitely damage public order.
If the input and output of these excessive things ranging from homosexuality to extramarital children and from houses of ill-fame to obscene publications bring to a community are compared, it will be clearer to understand what we want to say.
This is the very reason why Islam sets such harsh decrees on the issues of sexual deviation and intemperance in question. Actually, it would be more appropriate to say “those decrees help people on the surface which is slippery to the utmost and where slipping is always inevitable, hold their hands and provide them with a destination” than to say “they are harsh and they leave no liberty and limit freedom.”
Why does a married person look at indecent pictures?
After dealing with the religious aspect of the issue above, we should deal with the issue with respect to another perspective. Why does a believing heart that knows it will called to account in the hereafter for all that he committed here attempt such things?
It is a widely-known fact that lustful emotions are natural and because of the creation and nature for anyone who is a human. It is certain that the satisfaction for such emotions is a legal marriage. The reason why a married and believing man attempts such a thing might be his dissatisfaction with his wife or not finding what he has sought.
Since he considers it to be an embarrassing issue, he might not be able to tell anybody about it and perhaps he might not even talk to his wife. He might satisfy this feeling of his with obscene movies just because of the fact that he believes fornication is forbidden.
Please do not underestimate this possibility because today, there are a number of couples who end up in court due to sexual dissatisfaction. Polls and statistics conducted among people who have secret mates despite being married, and who have adulterous relationships and who go to houses of ill-fame proves that this matter is not a hypothesis or a prediction.
Naturally, addiction to such a case is not a disease which is only particular to men. Though comparatively less than men, women may also be addicted to looking at obscene images.
However, the result does not change. If such a reason lays beneath attempting to satisfy in a sense with obscene images, the thing that should be done is that spouses should be honest and bold to each other as much as possible. They should tell each other about their expectations and desires, and they should meet their expectations within legal bounds.
Obscene images cause addiction
However, if there is not such a problem, there is another possibility left : This person is psychologically ill and has a deviation in his sexual emotions. Although gazing at such indecent images begins as a temporary pleasure when they are young and when sexual emotions for the opposite sex come into existence or when they have been stupefied by lustful emotions, it later may have resulted in addiction.
This case might have caused a sexual deviation in a person who has lived long years open to obscenity and might have turned him into a person who becomes satisfied with only gazing at and seeing the obscenity. As a matter of fact, today, the number of such cases in our community is not low.
What should a person who suffers such kind of a disease do? In deed, in such a case, the thing they must do is to go through a psychological treatment. According to the Prophet’s indication, “sense of bashfulness which is a branch of belief” (Bukhari, Belief, 16) should not prevent this either because this is really a serious disease which is particular to our century and which needs to be treated.
Is belief not sufficient in this issue? It should certainly be and it should leave no need for a psychologist. This is the very reason for us why we have reminded you of the Qur’an and the Prophetic values and why we have constantly emphasized on them, so far.
Belief in Allah and in the Day of Resurrection should be integrated with mind and will and this problem should be overcome by applying all the commands and prohibitions that Islam introduces with no unclear point left. Such kind of sexuality which the West and Western values made become a commercial sector should not be promoted and exploitation of sexual emotions by others should be prevented.
Thus, we should have an honorable life style as a Muslim individual and we should not attempt things which we cannot account for in the hereafter and which will make us embarrassed when reports of our deeds are to open in the presence of our Lord.
Furthermore, by doing so, we might prevent awful pleasures, sexual deviations, illicit relationships, children born out of wedlock, psychological depressions, and divorcement and sucide etc caused by them, which today threaten humanity more than ever.
M. Ali Seyhan
25-)
What does dignity/to be dignified and modesty/to be modest mean; could you explain?
Dignity means sedateness. Dignity means showing a level of seriousness that is appropriate for one’s position, not being flighty, being sedate, acting carefully, following the manners that one’s position and personality require.
Dignity, which is often expressed as sedateness amongst people, is a virtue that earns other people’s respect to the dignified person. However, dignity should not grow to be arrogance; a dignified person should be modest at the same time. When these two traits exist together in one person, it is a perfect virtue. The Quranic verse “And the servants of (God) Most Gracious are those who walk on the earth in humility…” (al-Furqan, 25:63) and the hadith in which the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) suggests that people should not hurry into mosque but walk in quietly and modestly even though the prayer has already started (Bukhari, Adhan, 21) express the dignity which every Muslim should have. The Prophet always had a dignity which evoked a feeling of respectfulness and also a modesty which evokes love.
Personal qualities, traits, attitudes and behavior represent either high or low moral qualities under different circumstances. A civil servant’s seriousness in his workplace is considered a smart dignity; however, if he keeps the same mood when he is with his family, it is considered a foolish arrogance-proud. While an authorized person’s seriousness at work and a feeling of self-confidence stemming from that seriousness are worthy of praise, it is considered to be self-conceit if he acts the same way when he is home,. Similarly, while it is a virtue that is worthy of praise for an authorized person to be modest when he is with his family, it would be an expression of weakness and derogation rather than modesty if he showed the same mood at work.
At first sight, modesty and derogation look alike; however, they are very different indeed. And they are considered in different ways depending on situation. For instance, it is not an expression of modesty but derogation for an authorized person or a civil servant to stand up for everyone that walks in. however, it is modesty for them to do so in their homes. It is important to be able to realize the difference and distinguish between them.
Another important problem occurs between tahdith-i ni’mah (proclaiming Allah’s bounties) and arrogance. Proclaiming Allah’s bounties is a command of Allah. (ad-Duha, 93:11). It is also Allah’s command not to be arrogant; and arrogant ones are dispraised. (al-Mumin, 40:56).
In this sense, in order to show Allah’s bounties, to proclaim them without being arrogant, one should follow this way: Confess the beauties you have got – as a means of gratefulness – and believe that they are all gifts from Allah.
What increases or decreases the value of one’s words and behavior is that person’s intention. The message stressed in the hadith “A believer’s intention is more valuable than his acts.” (Majmua’z-Zawaid, 1/61) is remarkable.
We present a few examples which show the Prophet’s (pbuh) dignity and modesty below:
The Prophet said to a man who started to tremble because of his awe: “Pull yourself together! I am not a sovereign; contrarily, I am the son of a woman, who used to eat dehydrated meat and sole bread, from the tribe of Quraish.” (Ihya, 2/382).
There is both dignity and modesty in these words. The man trembled because of the Prophet’s awe, dignity, sedateness and seriousness. His statement “I am the son of a woman who used to eat sole bread” is the indication of his unique modesty.
Hazrat Umar narrates: The Prophet (pbuh) said:
“Never praise me too much, like Christians praise Jesus. I am just a servant of Allah. For this reason, call me Allah’s servant and messenger.” (Tirmidhi, Shamail, 293).
Hazrat Anas narrates: A woman said: “O Messenger of Allah! I need something; I need to talk to you.” He said: “I will come to wherever you want to talk, to whichever street or place of Madina.” (Tirmidhi, Shamail, 294).
26-)
Parent-Child Relations
First of all, You should express your wish to your dad in a polite and respectful way. Because he is your father. Quran urges children to be soft-spoken towards parents and show respect and kindness in their behaviour towards parents. so at first obey what the God orders then ask him if he can send you Mecca. But don't forget to be polite even his answer is negative.
27-)
Tesettur - The coverage of private parts
The body parts of a man, which must be covered, are from the navel to the lower end of the kneecap. Majority of scholar are unanimous that the kneecap is from the thighbone and must be covered too. The evidences to this are the hadiths of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) given below;
“The private parts (body parts which must be covered) of a man is between the navel end the kneecap.” (Ahmad b. Hambel, II, 187). “Kneecap is included to the private parts.” (Zaylai, Nasbu’r-Raye, I, 297).
28-)
What does to be equipped with the ethics of Allah mean?
To put it briefly, divine ethics is the ethics described in the Quran and the model of ethics which Allah is pleased with.
Allah has not created anything aimless; He has no useless activity. And man perceives that secret to the extent that he gives up useless acts which are good for nothing except consuming time. Subtle mysteries and endless wisdoms of this world of creatures are only known by Allah. As for man, he perceives those mysteries to the extent that he tries to comprehend those wisdoms.
Allah loves all His creatures which glorify Him especially His devoted servants who carry out thas duty in the best way. On the other hand, He is not pleased with people who associate partners with Him and who shows ingratitude to Him despite His bounties. Man perceives that mystery by loving those that He loves and by not loving those that He does not love. If man wills good deeds by means of his attribute of will, which is a Divine favor to him, if he uses his attribute of power to do good and beneficial deeds, if he learns useful knowledge by means of his attribute of knowledge; if he uses his feeling of mercy properly and deal with the servants of Allah and His other creatures mercifully, briefly if he uses that world of attributes and feelings, which is inherent in his spirit, in the direction which Allah will be pleased with, then he will be equipped with divine ethics.
All of the acts of Allah are in a straight path and when man asks Allah to be in the straight path, he is regarded to want to be equipped with the ethics of Allah
That is to say, if man wants to be a person of wisdom, he is supposed to be a slave with whom his Lord is pleased. It is not sufficient to be a person of wisdom to observe His creatures and to search and discover their benefits for mankind without pleasing Allah. Let us think of a man who comprehends the secret mysteries in the Quran but does not apply them. He is learned but not wise. The status of the people who do not read the book of the universe on behalf of Allah and who do not benefit from it in that aspect is no different from the othersA different definition of wisdom by Ghazali: Wisdom is to know the most exalted being by means of the most virtuous knowledge. Allah knows His personality, His attributes, His deeds and His Actions by means of His pre-eternal and post-eternal knowledge. According to this definition Allah is still wise, eternally wise even if there are no creatures. Thus, people walking on road leading to the Knowledge of Allah benefit from and receive lights and their share from that meaning of wisdom. And they reach to the highest levels of the honor of being equipped with divine ethics. That meaning carries out its decree primarily in prophets, then in great men who reached the honor of being the successors of the prophets and then in all of the believers depending on their spiritual levels. Everybody benefits from that great bounty in accordance with their belief, sincerity, knowledge and contemplation.
29-)
sign to imam
Without official marriage, we don’t recommend religious marriage ceremony. Especially for woman’s religious and worldly rights we do not regard it to be true. Firstly we advise you to make an official marriage beforehand.
According to Islam, when a man and a woman, with the permission of their family or not, marry in the presence of their witnesses, they are accepted as wife and husband. And unless man divorces his wife, woman can not marry someone else. In this respect it is very dangerous. As a matter of fact we receive so many questions such as: “I have made a religious marriage with someone and he does not divorce me, so what shall I do?”, “Without divorcing my past religious marriage I married someone else. Is it regarded as adultery?" We come across such problems so much. That is why we do not approve religious marriage without official marriage.
In religious marriage (nikah) ceremony there is no paper to be signed. But for a marriage to be acceptable, there are some conditions that must be complied. Nikah is a contract, an arrangement and a marriage agreement. Therefore it requires some conditions. If one of these conditions doesn’t occru then the nikah is invalid;
1. Ones who are going to marry or their agents must be present.
2. The declaration of the acceptance of the parts. The spouses must declare their acceptances of marriage by saying “I accept”.
3. Nikah must be announced, not be kept secret. This condition is according to some of the sects.
4. The permission of the parent of the girl. This rule is according to all sects except Hanafi sect.
5. Testifiers must be present. Such testifiers must be whether two males or one male two females who are sensible and at least in their adolescence. So there must be at least one male testifier.
30-)
How should we struggle against the wrongdoings done to us?
A person should prevent others from doing a wrongdoing and should prevent himself/herself from making an injustice to anyone. This is a duty. However, there are some Islamic rules regarding eliminating injustice made to us or others. They must be observed.
It is the order of our prophet (PBUH) to prevent any injustice or mischief through actions if not, verbally or otherwise from the heart. Our scholars explained this hadith as follows: it is the duty of the government or other officials to prohibit any “munkar” (mischief, bad deed) through actions. It is the duty of scholars or other officials who have knowledge to prevent that mischief verbally, and people who have no authority or power of knowledge should dislike it with their hearts; that is, they should disaffirm that mischief in their inner world.
According to this, when a person is faced with an injustice, he/she should apply to officials to get rid of it and let the people who have authority to remove that mischief informed about it. After all, when all these efforts yield no result, then that person will have his right on the Day of Judgment in the Gathering Place.
As for giving one’s blessing, it is a virtue; an individual may forgive indecent assaults that are made against him. People who do not retaliate equally or more against the injustices but choose the way of forgiving will definitely get the big reward in the hereafter. however, their rights are reserved. The choice is up to that person.
One day, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) mentioned about a mansion while talking about Paradise. “There is a mansion in Paradise that stands on the air. There is neither a pillar on its ground nor a rope tied to the sky. “The companions asked in amazement. “O Messenger of Allah, if there is neither any pillar under that mansion nor any tie on it, how will the inhabitants of that mansion enter there?”
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) smiled and said: “Just like birds perch on trees, the owners of that mansion will come by flying and enter it through its door; they will not need any stairs to enter.”
This beautiful mansion caught the attention of the companions. So they asked: “O, Messenger of Allah for whom is that mansion for?”
Prophet Muhammad (BPUH) said: “Those mansions are for the people who showed patience to the calamities they faced in the world.
31-)
Lying
Firstly, it will not be true to make a certain decision on such a subject since we don’t know all the details of the subject. But to enlighten the subject we will specify some points below:
1- First of all a believer should cover up one’s fault. S/he doesn’t have to give information to someone who is not directly related and in charged with the event.
2- The essence for the sins is to keep secret. That is to say, it is not true to expose and to spread the sins.
3- Only to the courts, you have to tell the truth for such the subject. To prevent a harm, an injustice or a wrong in an event that concerning the public and if our testimony will be beneficial for both the person and public then the fault is explained, otherwise we should act in accordance with the benefits of the person and the public. If saying the truth will be harmful we shall keep silent.
32-)
Is it sin to dislike dishes cooked for us and to be picky about dishes?
It is not sin to like some dishes better than others or not to eat some dishes. However, it is not appropriate to disdain or speak ill of any food or dish.
The Prophet (pbuh) did not ever disdain any food or dish that he disliked publicly and also prohibited others disdain. He emphasized that it is necessary that people behave respectful to other people’s choices and prevented foods from being wasted away by saying “Leave what you dislike. Do not make it haram for others.”
What the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) looked for in a dish or food primarily was halal-ness and cleanliness and whether it was beneficial to body or not. He never had the habit of being picky about food and disdaining them.
Abu Huraira says:
“The Prophet never criticized any food. He would eat food given to him if he was hungry or leave it if he was not. Especially, when he was guest in someone’s house, he would compliment the host about the food offered and express that he liked the food offered a lot.”
33-)
Is it sinful to violate a non-Muslim’s rights?
Personal rights are valid for non-Muslims, too. If you have violated a non-Muslim’s right, you have to compensate for it and seek his forgiveness. As one’s rights belong to him only, it is essential to respect those rights whether he is Muslim or non-Muslim. Someone who wrongs another one is going to be called to account for what he has done, no matter who he is.
According to Imam Azam and Imam Muhammad, it is impermissible for a Muslim who lives in a non-Muslim country to defraud Muslims and to steal or to usurp their possessions, as well as non-Muslims because Islam is a religion of tolerance and virtue and it prohibits fraud, betrayal and immoral and disgusting things everywhere.
And if one goes to Europe and finds something that belongs to the state or an individual, he has to return it to the owner. (Hidayah v.2, p.66).
34-)
Does Envying Mean Criticizing Divine Determining?
A noble verse concerning envy: Or do they envy mankind for what Allah has given them of his bounty? (An-Nisa), 54)
Let us imagine a man who tried his utmost, worked in the licit bounds and started to wait for Allahs mercy and favor after performing active and verbal supplications to obtain a certain blessing. The duty of a believer when he sees the Divine favor bestowed on that man is to be as happy as if it was bestowed on him. Belief in Divine Determining and Islamic fraternity requires that attitude.
A sentence of threat from Master Badiuzzaman, a scholar of Islam, to those who do not act in the way demonstrated above and show envy and animosity: Whoever criticizes Divine Determining is striking his head against an anvil on which it will break and whoever objects to Divine Mercy will himself be deprived of it. (The Letters)
In the noble verse mentioned above, there is a wise notification as Allah has given them of his bounty By attributing this notification, scholars of interpretation stated that it was permissible to envy wealth not gained through illegal ways and added the following: To Wish that a defrauder would lose his property is not envy but diligence and justice.
According to the last interpretation, it is not envying to wish that a man who becomes affluent by stealing would lose his property. Envy is to be unable to stand licit affluence, a rank or a virtue that Allah has given them of his bounty. As for wishing that those will be seized from a believer means criticizing Divine Determining and opposing mercy.
Hereby we shall mention the difference between emulation and envy. The desire to have a property or an opportunity that someone possesses is emulation and it is licit. As for envy, it is the wish that that property or opportunity not to be given to him but to be seized from its owner.
35-)
What are the appropriate manners for speaking? What about the appropriate manners for listening?
36-)
Do we have the right to hurt people? How should we react against the insults and bad deeds that we are exposed to?
The religion of Islam is against all kind bad deeds and hurting. For, Islam tries to make man real man. It elevates man to the rank of real humanity. Therefore, Islam gives orders that lead man to all kinds of perfection and beauty; and it forbids deeds that will lead man to all kinds of disgrace and ugliness.
Acting upon these general rules, we can say that all kinds of deeds that will hurt and disturb other people are sins and haram. For, it is haram to hurt Muslims and it makes a person a sinner. In the religion of Islam, it is forbidden to disturb even an unbeliever if he is innocent. For, the Prophet (pbuh) said,
“I am the enemy of a person who oppresses a dhimmi."(al-Hindi, Kanzu’l-Ummal, IV / 618; al-Jamiu’s-Saghir, I / 1210)
It is not permissible to hurt them in any case.
We should show patience to the insults to us and regard them as addressing our evil-commanding soul. For, mentioning the faults of the soul will improve it and atone for our sins. It will enable us to have sincerity and to eliminate the feelings aiming to gain people's liking.
Patience is a faculty of the spirit; it is a nice character. One can put up with the things that are hard to endure and that are difficult for the soul only through patience. Perseverance shown to defend and maintain a right is possible only through patience. It is necessary to be patient and to get used to being patient in order to fulfill Allah's orders, to resist the requests and desires of the soul that are not liked by the mind and religion and that are illegitimate, to endure the troubles and misfortunes that inflict great pain and grief upon man and to overcome them.
This trait is the mother of all virtues and the secret behind being successful in life and attaining perfection. Patience is superior to all virtues.
"For,Allah is with those who patiently persevere." (al-Baqara, 2/153, 155)
Patience leads to salvation and success. Patience is bitter but its result is sweet. Hz. Prophet (pbuh) stated the following to inform us about the virtue of patience:
"He who shows patience succeeds."
"Patience is the key to success."
"Patience is a light."
"Patience is a treasure among the treasures of Paradise."
"There are a lot of good things in showing patience to the things that trouble you."
Hz. Prophet (pbuh) emphasized the importance of patience shown as soon as a misfortune hits as follows:
"True patience is patience shown at the time the misfortune hits."(Bukhari, Janaiz, 32)
To show patience does not mean to accept condemnation, poverty and humiliation, to put up with unjust violations and the attacks that harm human dignity and to keep silent when they take place. For, it is not permissible to show patience to illegitimate things. It is necessary to feel disturbed and to struggle against them. It is weakness and laziness for a man to put up with the bad deeds that he can overcome through his own power and will or to take things easy when he can do something. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) prayed as follows:
"O Lord! I take refuge in you from weakness and laziness."(Bukhari, Jihad, 25)
There are some troubles that a person cannot overcome with his own power and will. When misfortunes like that happen to a believer, he needs to show patience to divine predestination without panicking and complaining; it is one of the characteristics of believers. As a matter of fact, Allah orders comely patience in the Quran. (Yusuf, 12/18). The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"Comely patience is patience that does not make a person complain."
In fact, it is of no use and unnecessary to show patience when one can do something and to show impatience when one cannot do anything.
Patience, which is mentioned in more than seventy verses of the Quran, means to act in accordance with the compulsory situations that are contrary to human nature and to resist difficulties. The aim of patience is not to feel uneasy, not to panic and to endure when unexpected things happen and difficulties arise. Allah gives glad tidings that He will reward endlessly those who show patience and praises them.
Believers are often exposed to the oppression and bad deeds of the enemies of Allah, are tortured and are forced to fight them just because they believe in Allah. At that time, patience is the source of power for a believer and the protector of his belief. When the Pharaoh wanted to torture those who believed in Hz. Musa (Moses), they prayed Allah as follows:
"Our Lord! Pour out on us patience and constancy, and Take our souls unto Thee as Muslims (who bow to Thy will)."(al-Araf, 7/126)
It is very well known how our beloved Prophet (pbuh) and the first Muslims showed patience and endurance to the tortures and torments inflicted upon them.
The aspects of the worshipping that our souls find difficult get easier with patience. Thus, we perform prayers five times a day in peace and perform fasting on hot summer days without any difficulties. The same thing is valid for the other kinds of worshipping and ethical deeds:
"But indeed if any show patience and forgive, that would truly be an exercise of courageous will and resolution in the conduct of affairs."(ash-Shura, 42/43);
"And We shall try you until We test those among you who strive their utmost and persevere in patience; and We shall try your reported (mettle)."(Muhammad, 47/31).
Man often obeys his soul; he finds it difficult to obey Allah's orders and to avoid what He forbids; he wants to meet the bad desires of his soul and avoids good deeds and virtues. For instance, he finds it nicer to spend his money for entertainment and his pleasure than giving it to the poor. Playing games is more attractive for a child than studying. People prefer wandering about to working and earning money.
In that case, it is a nice attitude for man to choose the good and useful alternative even if he finds it difficult and to try to do it by showing patience and endurance.
Besides, people can live in abundance or poverty, live healthily or become ill, be exposed to disasters like flood, earthquake and fire; then, the biggest support and assistance for man is patience. Doing the opposite will lead man to rebellion and ingratitude. God Almighty states the following regarding the issue:
"…Behold, he that is righteous and patient, never will Allah suffer the reward to be lost, of those who do right."(Yusuf, 12/90).
Prophets are the greatest examples of patience. For, they showed patience to all kinds of difficulties. We hope that Allah will make us among the people who are "firmly patient and constant― grateful and appreciative". (Ibrahim, 14/5)
Patience leads to salvation. Patience is the beginning of belief, worshipping, knowledge and wisdom, in short, all virtues. A patient person is a good person. Allah states that those who do righteous deeds, and join together in the mutual teaching of the truth and patience will attain salvation. Patience is the way that leads to victory. (al-Asr, 103/1-3)
The Prophet (pbuh) said,
"Allah gives patience to a person who perseveres and endures. Nobody has been given a better and bigger bounty than patience."(Tirmidhi, Birr, 76)
"It will be very useful for you if you show patience to what you do not like."(Ahmad b. Hanbal, Müsned, I, 307)
Furthermore, God Almighty states the following regarding the issue:
"Be sure We shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods, lives and the fruits (of your toil), but give glad tidings to those who patiently persevere."(al-Baqara, 2/ 155).
We learn from the verse above and similar ones that Allah tests man through various troubles and that those who patiently persevere pass this test.
All of the problems are settled and obstacles are overcome through patience. As the saying goes, "Everything comes to him who waits."
Hz. Prophet (pbuh) says,
"Strange are the ways of a believer for there is good in every affair of his and this is not the case with anyone else except in the case of a believer for if he has an occasion to feel delight, he thanks God; thus, it is good for him; and if he gets into trouble, he endures it patiently; thus, it is good for him."(Riyadus-Salihin, 1, 54)
Patience, which we believe to be definitely good for us, is a common attribute of all prophets. All prophets were exposed to various troubles, were tortured and expelled from their hometowns while they were conveying the religion of Allah to people. They were put to prison by kings but they always showed patience. There are many verses in the Quran mentioning the patience of prophets. The life of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) is full of examples of comely patience. Therefore, the duty of every Muslim is to ask for patience from Allah and to be patient by thinking that patience leads to salvation.
37-)
Is it permissible for a Muslim to swear at, curse or damn another Muslim? How should a person react to those who swear at him?
Answer 1:
The religion of Islam is against all kinds of bad deeds and hurting others. For, Islam tries to make humans real humans. It elevates man to the level of real humanity. Therefore, Islam gives orders that will lead man to perfection and good deeds; on the other hand, it prohibits the deeds that lead man to disgrace and disgusting things.
Acting upon this general rule, we can say that swearing, cursing and damning that will offend and disturb others are regarded as haram and sins. For, it is haram to offend a Muslim; it makes a Muslim a sinner. In the religion of Islam, it is forbidden to disturb even an unbeliever if he is innocent because the Prophet (pbuh) said,
“I am the enemy of the one who torments a dhimmi.” (Abu Yusuf, Kharaj, Matbaatu's Salafiyya 1397 h. Cairo, p. 135)
Answer 2:
Hadiths related to swearing at and cursing Muslims:
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, "To swear at a Muslim is fisq (transgression, sin) and to fight him is unbelief (kufr)." (Bukhari, Iman 36; Muslim, Iman 116)
"Do not call a person fasiq (transgressor, sinner) or kafir (unbeliever). If the person that is accused is not a fasiq or kafir, the person who utters that word becomes a fasiq or kafir." (Bukhari, Adab 44)
To curse, swear at, speak in a way to offend the person one is addressing means to assault verbally a person's honor, chastity, religion and faith, in short, his human and Islamic values.
In the first hadith, two deeds are dealt with two different terms: "To swear at a Muslim is fisq and to fight him is unbelief." Fisq means to deviate from the true path. This meaning is seen in the following verse clearly: "…and he (Satan) broke the Command of his Lord." (al-Kahf, 18/50) Therefore, deviation from the right path and transgression is expressed by the word fisq. Fasiq means a person who deviated from the right path and a sinner. To fight a Muslim, to try to kill him and to kill him is unbelief.
It is possible to understand and interpret the hadith as follows: "To curse Muslims is the act of sinners and to fight Muslims is the act of unbelievers. Therefore, it is possible for the Muslims who do so to become sinners and unbelievers."
The second hadith draws attention to the danger of accusing others of fisq and unbelief and calling them fasiqs (sinners) and unbelievers. If the person who is accused is really a fasiq or an unbeliever, there is no problem However, if the person who is accused is not really a fasiq or an unbeliever, the one who calls that person a fasiq or an unbeliever becomes a fasiq or an unbeliever.
Both hadiths point out clearly that it is a major sin to criticize a Muslim unjustly about his religion and belief and to accuse him, by disturbing him; and they ask Muslims to keep away from such deeds that are very dangerous and sinful.
Accordingly, the following issues are in question:
1. To swear at and curse a Muslim, to try to kill a Muslim are deeds of fasiqs and unbelievers.
2. To accuse a Muslim of fisq and unbelief can cause the person who accuses to become a fasiq and an unbeliever.
3. It is haram to hurt and distress a Muslim by words, deeds or any other way.
4. It is necessary for Muslims for their own interests to obey the warnings of the hadiths as much as possible.
Answer 3:
What is the decree about damning a Muslim?
"The Believers are but a single Brotherhood." (al-Hujurat, 49/10)
As the verse decrees, Muslims are brothers; therefore, let alone, swearing at one another, it was rendered haram for them not to be on speaking terms for more than three days, to backbite, to mock, to give bad names and even to have bad thoughts about one another by verses and hadiths. (See the translation and interpretation of the chapter of al-Hujurat for more information.)
The Prophet (pbuh) stated the following:
"Do not curse or damn one another by asking the wrath of Allah and Hell." (Abu Dawud, Adab 53, (4906); Tirmidhi, Birr 48, (1977)
"A believer neither curses nor damns; he is neither rude nor shameless." (Tirmidhi, Birr 48)
"Those who damn people a lot cannot intercede on the Day of Judgment; nor can they be martyrs." (Muslim, Birr 85, (2598); Abu Dawud, Adab 53, (4907)
If a person damns another person who does not deserve to be damned, he himself will be damned. The Prophet said,
"Know it very well that if a person damns another person unjustly, he himself will be damned." (Abu Dawud, Adab 53, (4908); Tirmidhi, Birr 48, (1979)
We can understand from the following statement of the Prophet (pbuh) that swearing at and cursing a person is such a disgusting thing and that it is necessary for Muslims to protect one another, not to leave one another under oppression and to cover one another's mistakes:
"Do not have bad thoughts about others. For bad thoughts are the biggest lies. Do not seek other people's sins and mistakes; do not compete against one another; do not be jealous of one another; do not hate one another; do not turn your backs on one another. O slaves of Allah! Be brothers as Allah orders."
A Muslim is the brother of another Muslim. He does not betray, oppress, deprive or despise him.
It is enough as evil for a person to despise his Muslim brother." (Bukhari, Nikah 45, Adab 57, 58, Faraiz 2; Muslim, Birr 28-34, (2563 - 2564); Abu Dawud, Adab 40, 56, (4882, 4917); Tirmidhi, Birr 18, (1928).
Since damning and cursing are stated to be so dangerous by the Prophet, those that are beyond damning and cursing are more dangerous and they attract Allah's wrath.
A believer does not wish anything but guidance.
Let alone damning a Muslim, the Prophet did not damn or curse a polytheist without any reason. Abu Hurayra narrates: "I said to the Messenger of Allah,
' O Messenger of Allah! Will you curse and damn the polytheists?'
The Messenger of Allah answered, 'I was sent as mercy not as curse.'"(Muslim, Birr 87, (2597)
Answer 4:
How should we react to those who curse and insult us?
It becomes evident that we experience things for the Day of Judgment. Everything man does from bad words to evil deeds, from insulting to injustice, from kindness to respect produces data for the Day of Judgment.
It is haram for a Muslim to swear at another Muslim. It is haram to swear whether a person starts the swearing or swears in response to another person's swearing. If he starts the swearing, he commits a major sin. The Prophet defines a Muslim as follows:
“A Muslim is a person from whose hand and tongue other Muslims are safe.”(Riyadu’s-Salihin, 211)
In a hadith of the Prophet, swearing at a Muslim is included among the social mistakes that lead a Muslim who performed prayers, fasting and zakah but who had bad relationships with others to bankruptcy on the Day of Judgment. (Riyadu’s-Salihin, 218)
The Messenger of Allah states the following regarding the issue:
* “If a person insults you and blames you for something that you do not do, do not insult or blame him even if he has a bad characteristic and commits sins. Leave him with his sins and get rewards from Allah. Do not ever curse anybody.” (Jamiu’s-Saghir, 1/66)
* “A person who believes in Allah does not oppress people when he gets angry. He does not commit a sin for a person he loves. He does not lose or harm anything that is entrusted to him. He is not jealous of anybody. He does not tarnish anybody. He does not curse or damn the people around him. He accepts if he is wrong even if there are no witnesses. He does not call people by bad names.” (Jamiu’s-Saghir, 2/1375)
* “Be careful! To kill a believer is a property of unbelievers. To swear at a believer is a property of unbelievers. It is not permissible for a believer not to be on speaking terms with his believing brother for more than three days.” (Jamiu’s-Saghir, 2/1435)
* “To kill a Muslim fits an unbeliever. It is a sin to swear at a Muslim. (Jamiu’s-Saghir, 3/2912)
* “It is among major sins to defame a Muslim's honor. It is among major sins to swear at a person twice when that person swears at him once.” (Jamiu’s-Saghir, 3/3491)
* “The sin between two persons who swear at each other belongs to the one who starts swearing unless the other person transgresses the boundaries.” (Muslim, Birr, 68)
So, we should not transgress the boundaries. Accordingly, the following points are important:
1- You should not start swearing or cursing.
2- If the other party starts swearing at you, you should show patience if it is possible and you should not fall down to his level. You should refer him to Allah. You should not forget that Allah's justice is absolute.
3-It should be taken into consideration that the person swearing at you may regret and apologize if you do not respond. In that case, his situation will depend on you. If you forgive him, he will be saved from being accounted in the hereafter. If you do not forgive him, you will get your due even if he apologizes. Or, Allah will get your due even if you do not know. Allah will reward you for controlling your temper and maintaining peace.
4- If you cannot keep your temper, you should not respond him by swearing more than he did, which is regarded as oppression.
5- You will hear severe delusions of Satan when you lose your temper. Satan will make you see red. You should take refuge in Allah from being cruel.
6- Unfortunately, the delusions of Satan and the provocations of people coincide. Never heed them.
If the other party starts swearing at you, you can respond him in the same way. However, if you do so, you will not get any rewards in the hereafter since you lose your right by responding him in the same way.
38-)
Is it necessary to apologize after breaking somebody's heart?
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) emphasized the importance of asking for pardon by saying,
"Whoever has wronged his brother should ask for his pardon (before his death), as (in the Hereafter) there will be neither a dinar nor a dirham. (He should secure pardon in this life) before some of his good deeds are taken and paid to his brother, or, if he has done no good deeds, some of the bad deeds of his brother are taken to be loaded on him (in the Hereafter)."(Tajrid Sarih Translation, hadith numbered VII/375, 376, 1090 hadith numbered)
We learn from a hadith reported by Bukhari that the rights will be settled in the hereafter if it is not done in the world:
"After being saved from Hell, the believers will be stopped at a bridge between Paradise and Hell and mutual retaliation will be established among them regarding wrongs they have committed in the world against one another. After they are cleansed and purified (through the retaliation), they will be admitted into Paradise."(Tajrid Sarih Translation, hadith numbered VII/353-354, 1085)
"On the Day of Judgment, all of the rights will be given to their owners. The hornless sheep would get its claim from the horned sheep." (Tirmidhi, Sifatu'l Qiyama, I)
The hadith above shows the importance of the rights of individuals and the importance of asking for pardon.
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) informs us about the importance of the rights of individuals and asking for pardon and settling claims as follows:
"All of the sins of martyrs are forgiven except the rights of individuals." (Tajrid Sarih Translation, hadith numbered VII/349, 1084)
The Messenger of Allah defined those who need to ask for pardon from others as "bankrupt" and described their situation as follows:
"The bankrupt is a person from my nation who comes on the Day of Judgment with prayer, fasting, and charity, but also with insulting, slandering, consuming wealth, shedding blood, and beating others. They will each be given from his good deeds; if his good deeds run out before the score is settled, their bad deeds will be cast upon him, then he will be thrown into Hell."(Muslim, Birr, 59)
Asking for pardon and settling claims with people is the only way of getting rid of debts in order to be saved from bankruptcy in the hereafter.
39-)
Is it sin to dislike dishes cooked for us and to be picky about dishes?
It is not sin to like some dishes better than others or not to eat some dishes. However, it is not appropriate to disdain or speak ill of any food or dish.
The Prophet (pbuh) did not ever disdain any food or dish that he disliked publicly and also prohibited others disdain. He emphasized that it is necessary that people behave respectful to other people’s choices and prevented foods from being wasted away by saying “Leave what you dislike. Do not make it haram for others.”
What the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) looked for in a dish or food primarily was halal-ness and cleanliness and whether it was beneficial to body or not. He never had the habit of being picky about food and disdaining them.
Abu Huraira says:
“The Prophet never criticized any food. He would eat food given to him if he was hungry or leave it if he was not. Especially, when he was guest in someone’s house, he would compliment the host about the food offered and express that he liked the food offered a lot.”
40-)
How can we forgive the people who have harmed us?
Man needs to avoid wronging others; similarly, he needs to prevent others from doing wrong. This is a duty. However, there are some Islamic criteria about eliminating the wrongs inflicted upon us or others. It is necessary to comply with them.
For instance, it is the order of the Prophet (pbuh) to prevent an evil, an unfair deed through hands, if not possible through the tongue and if not possible, to dislike it through the heart. This hadith of the Prophet (pbuh) has been explained as follows by our scholars:
To prevent an evil through the handis the duty of the state and the other authorized people. To prevent an evil through the tongue is the duty of the scholars and the people who have enough knowledge about the issue. Those who have no authority and knowledge need to dislike that evil through their hearts.
Accordingly, it is necessary to apply to the authorities when one is wronged in order to eliminate that wrong treatment and to make the people who have power to interfere. If all of these ways are used and if the evil cannot be prevented, it means that person will receive his right in the hereafter on the day of reckoning in the Gathering Place.
As for the issue of waiving one's rights and forgiving,it is a virtue; a person can forgive the transgressions committed against his own rights if he wishes. Those who do not retaliate against the bad deeds committed by their believing brothers and forgive them will definitely receive their great rewards in the hereafter. They can demand their rights if they wish. It is up to them to decide.
"He is the One that accepts repentance from His Servants and forgives sins: and He knows all that ye do."(ash-Shura, 42/25)
As it is stated in the verse above, Allah is the most forgiving. As people who comply with the ethics that Allah likes, we, believers, prefer to forgive the other people when we are wronged by them and do good deeds in return for bad deeds. It is the characteristic of the people who have taqwa to show patience when they are wronged, to forgive a person who does a bad deed, not to nurture revenge and to overcome one's fury. The expression of this attitude is the consent and love of Allah. Allah states the following in the Quran:
"Those who spend (freely) whether in prosperity or in adversity; who restrain anger and pardon (all) men; for Allah loves those who do good."(Aal-i Imran, 3/134)
A person who does a good deed in return for a bad deed and forgives the person who does a bad deed becomes a means of a peaceful life both for himself and the people around him. It is definitely a very easy, peaceful and comfortable life that cannot be compared to a hard life that is full of the feelings of grudge, hatred, enmity and revenge all the time. Man will have to show patience and make an effort for a while in order to get rid of the feelings of fury and grudge that he has at the beginning; however, he will lead a life full of love, respect and peace thanks to this ethics he nurtures. Allah addresses believers as follows: in the Quran:
"Nor can Goodness and Evil be equal. Repel (Evil) with what is better: then will he between whom and thee was hatred become as it were thy friend and intimate! And no one will be granted such goodness except those who exercise patience and self-restraint none but persons of the greatest good fortune." (Fussilat, 41/34-35)
Allah presents people a nice and easy life in return for high ethics. Around a person who is not forgiving are people who nurture grudge and hatred against him; however, a person who is forgiving finds a life full of peace and sincere friends in the world. In the hereafter, he will be rewarded for this high ethics in the best way; The following is stated in a verse in the Quran:
"Their Lord doth give them glad tidings of a Mercy from Himself, of His good pleasure, and of Gardens for them wherein are delights that endure."(at-Tawba, 9/21)
41-)
Is the statement “Breaking a heart is like destroying the Kaaba” a hadith?
We could not find a hadith narration meaning, “Breaking a heart is like destroying the Kaaba” However, there are narrations showing that this statement is true:
According to a hadith narration, our Prophet (pbuh) stated the following while looking at the Kaaba:
“Indeed, Allah has made you very honorable, very respectable and very lofty; but the believer is more honorable / more respectable than you.” (Ibn Majah, Fitan, 2; Majmauz-Zawaid, 1/81).
The following is stated in another hadith, which Tirmidhi calls “Hasan”:
“The destruction of the world in the sight of Allah is better than the killing of a believer.” (Tirmidhi, Diyat, 7; Nasai, Tahrim, 2)
Considering this hadith and similar ones, Mawlana stated the following:
“The Kaaba is a building constructed by Azar’s son, Khalil Ibrahim. Almighty Allah looks at the heart. Therefore, destroying one heart is worse than destroying a thousand Kaabas.”
Badiuzzaman Said Nursi states the following regarding the issue:
“O unjust man! See now what a great sin is rancor and enmity toward a brother believer! If you were to say that ordinary small stones are more valuable than the Ka’ba and greater than Mount Uhud, it would be an ugly absurdity. So too, belief which has the value of the Ka’ba, and Islam which has the splendor of Mount Uhud, as well as other Islamic attributes, demand love and concord; but if you prefer to belief and Islam certain shortcomings which arouse hostility, but in reality are like the small stones you too will be engaging in great injustice, foolishness, and sin.”(Mektubat, Yirmi İkinci Mektup)
The statement “Bringing someone who transgresses into line is like dressing forty orphans” is an anonymous statement. Maybe it is appropriate to use it from time to time. However, it must be done by the state and authorized institutions. Therefore, it is not appropriate to adopt this statement as a universal rule. In addition, it is stated in many verses and hadiths that “forgiving is a better way”.
Therefore, those who want to practice Islam in an ideal way and show its beauty - with words and deeds - should take the following verse and hadith as a full guide:
“It is part of the Mercy of Allah that thou dost deal gently with them Wert thou severe or harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about thee: so, pass over (Their faults), and ask for (Allah’s) forgiveness for them; and consult them in affairs (of moment). Then, when thou hast Taken a decision put thy trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him).” (Aal-i Imran, 3/159).
“A strong/heroic person is not the one who knocks his opponent down on the wrestling mat, but the one who controls himself when he is angry.” (Bukhari, Adab, 76; Muslim, Birr, 107-108).
42-)
What should we do if we cannot leave a place where people talk about others behind their backs and we have to listen to them?
When you see that you cannot prevent people from backbiting, read the following prayer and leave that place if it is possible:
"Allahummaghfirli wa liman ightabnahu"
"O Allah! Forgive us and the person we backbit.”(Suyuti, al-Fathu’l-Kabir, I/87)
If you cannot leave that place, you will not be held responsible for the statements including backbiting that you hear involuntarily.
43-)
Why does greed cause loss and failure? What are the worldly and otherworldly harms of greed?
Greed causes the failure of the attempts and enterprises since the feeling of haste is inherent in it. For, a greedy person is not satisfied with small achievements and gives way to despair; he does not follow up his tasks, gives up what he is doing in a short time and does not achieve even what he can achieve.
On the other hand, if a contented person does whatever he is to do properly, he will not feel sorry because of the outcomes. He might not be successful at times but he will be successful at other times due to follow up and perseverance.
The most terrible disease of social life is greed. If you love money and property a lot, demand it with abstinence, not with greed, so that they will come to you in abundance.
The cause of the poverty of Muslims is not hating the worldly things but approaching the worldly things with greed.
44-)
Will you give information about not keeping one's promise and breach of faith?
The religion of Islam introduced many principles like the consciousness of Islamic responsibility, altruism, generosity, sincerity, loyalty, keeping promises, chastity and decency, which will make a person act sensitively to his environment and think of others before himself. On the other hand, it prohibits attributes like egoism, stinginess, keeping silent in the face of injustice and being indifferent, which would cause him to act indifferently to his environment and even to harm his environment.
If a person breaks his promise though he is in a position to keep it and attributes it do qadar, he is regarded to have committed a sin and to have violated other people's rights. Therefore, he needs to repent and ask for forgiveness from those people.
45-)
Telling lies is haram; but what should we do when we are in a difficult situation?
Is there anyone who is not disturbed when he hears the word “lie” and the meaning it denotes? Yes, some bad attributes actually disturb everyone.
Lying, which is the opposite of truth, straightforwardness and loyalty, is a bad habit that almost everyone hates. However, is it permissible to lie and make false statements in some cases?
First of all, let us refer to the hadiths and narrations that allow making statements that sound like lies for some reasons, and the views of Islamic scholars on the issue:
The following hadith is mentioned in Sahihs of Bukhari and Muslim:
“He who makes peace between the people by inventing good information or saying good things is not a liar.”(Bukhari, Sulh 2; Muslim, Birr 101)
Muslim also includes a narration from Umm Kulthum (ra) in the continuation of the same hadith:
“I have never heard that exemption was granted in anything what the people speak as lie but in three cases: 1) in battle, 2) for bringing reconciliation amongst persons, 3) and the narration of the words of the husband to his wife, and the narration of the words of a wife to her husband (in a twisted form in order to bring reconciliation between them)”(Muslim, ibid)
We can summarize the explanation of those narrations in the light of the explanations of the hadith scholars made by Kamil Miras as follows:
The meaning of the phrase “it is not regarding as lying to tell lies to reconcile people” in the hadith means that there is no sin for such a lie because a lie is not declared to be not a lie in the hadith, but it is only stated that there is no sin associated with that kind of lie. There is no doubt that a lie is still a lie in its nature whether it is told to reconcile people or for any other purpose.
There are different opinions among the scholars regarding the permission to lie in three places, but the opinion of the majority of hadith scholars is as follows:
It is absolutely forbidden to tell a lie and to say that something happened though it did not happen. The permission in the hadith about lying is in the form of “tawriya” and “iham”. Tawriya means a person’s using a word that has several meanings, by referring to its least used meaning. Iham means using a word that has two meanings by referring to its meaning that is used less.
We can give the following examples to explain them:
When you say to the enemy soldier, “Your king died” during a war, you can mean one of the previous kings of the enemy.
When it is necessary to speak and express an opinion but you do not want Islam and Muslims to be harmed, you can make some indirect sentences without resorting to direct lies.
Similarly, if a person who wants to win the hearts of his wife and daughter uses an expression such as “InshaAllah - if Allah wills” when he promises them something and does not immediately give them what he has promised, he will not be regarded to have lied because this promise is related to the future.
Besides, when a person reconciles two people who are angry with each other says, “So-and-so prays for you” and he means that person said, “O Allah! Forgive all Muslims”, he is not regarded to have made a false statement. (Tecrid-i Sarih Tercemesi, VIII/111-112) Thus, he is relieved by getting rid of the responsibility of lying. The Prophet (pbuh) clarifies the issue by stating the following in a hadith narrated by Imam Bayhaqi:
“There is relief in ambiguous and allegorical expressions, making you get rid of lies.”(at -Taj, V/55)
However, since a lot of lies are told in every field today, Badiuzzaman Said Nursi wants people to be sensitive and careful in such matters to prevent lies:
“...However, sometimes in the past lying abrogated this if there were advantages to be gained. Some scholars issued ‘temporary’ fatwas in case of necessity or for benefit. But in this age, such fatwas may not be given. For it has been abused so much that there may be only one benefit among a hundred harms. The judgement cannot therefore be based on benefit”
“For example, the cause for shortening the ritual prayers while on a journey is hardship. But it cannot be the reason. For it has no determined limit and may be abused. The reason may only be “the journey”.
That is, the real reason for shortening four-rak’ah fard prayers and performing them as two rak’ahs is “journey”, being a traveler. Even if there is no hardship, it can be shortened. If hardship is seen as the real reason, everyone can change and apply this decree according to himself. People may abuse it by thinking, “I have not had any difficulties; so, I can pray them as four rak'ahs.”. In order to prevent this, the prayer is shortened whether there is hardship or not.
After this example, Nursi finally mentions the following issue:
“Similarly, benefit may not be the reason for telling a lie. Because it has no specified limit and is a swamp breeding abuse. The judgement for a fatwa may not be based on it. In which case, ‘Either truthfulness or silence.’ That is, there are two ways, not three; that is, not either the truth, or lies, or silence.”
“Indeed, everything you say must be true, but it is not right to say everything true. If on occasion it is damaging, then be silent. But there is no fatwa for lying.” (see Hutbe-i Şamiye, Üçüncü Kelime)
Question: Why did our Prophet (pbuh) give permission to lie in war even though it is very bad to lie; does it not mean deception? In addition; it means winning a war with a trick; it does not fit humanity; no one who fights will believe Muslims because of it.
a. According to Islam, lying is a great sin.
“Shun the abomination of idols, and shun the word that is false.”(al-Hajj, 22/30)
It is remarkable that lying is mentioned after polytheism in the verse above.
b. The religion of Islam is based on trueness. It is pointed out in many places in the Quran that the Quran is a book that tells the truth and that the Prophet (pbuh) is a truthful prophet; besides, it is emphasized that the revelation and our Lord, who is the owner of religion, are truthful.
“And whose word can be truer than Allah’s?”(an-Nisa, 4/122)
The issue is preferred to be expressed in a question form in order to awaken the most heedless minds in the verse above.
c. Belief is based on truth, and unbelief is based on lies. Can it be thought that Islam allows “telling a lie, which is a word of unbelief” without a necessity?
That the Prophet of Islam (pbuh) had been known as “Muhammadul-Amin = reliable and trustworthy Muhammad with his words and deeds” since his childhood by the people around him tells us a lot of things. If such a person gave permission to lie related to some issues, it is necessary to try to understand the wisdom behind it.
d. The judgment “winning a war with a trick; it does not fit humanity; no one who fights will believe Muslims” is really interesting. That heroic statement meaning “War is fought bravely...” has no place in war.
All wars fought in the history of humanity since the beginning of wars are aimed at killing the enemy, the other party. You come out to kill the enemy, but when you find the opportunity to kill your enemy, you stop killing because you think, “it does not fit chivalry”. It is called stupidity. Such an attitude can even lead to your execution due to treason.
e. All war tactics, expressed with words such as “war strategy, war tactics, war maneuver, war scenario” used by all countries today, are tricks, deceptions, de facto lies aimed at deceiving the other side and diverting the target. In war, phrases such as “not stabbing in the back, fighting chivalrously” are heard only in movies.
As a matter of fact, the Prophet (pbuh) said,
“War is khud’a: War is a tactic to mislead the other side.”(Bukhari, Jihad, 157; Muslim, Jihad, 18-19)
Although this statement of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) is evident in the soundest hadith sources, it is a very serious religious risk for a believer to try to show that it is wrong of instead of learning the wisdom behind it.
f. “Indeed, righteousness leads man to goodness and beauty, and goodness leads man to Paradise. As a person keeps speaking truthfully, he is recorded as siddiq/very honest - in the eye of Allah. Indeed, lying leads to bad deeds and evil, and evil leads to fire/Hell. As a person keeps telling lies, he is recorded as a liar - in the eye of Allah.”(Muslim, Birr, 103-105).
Now let us think justly: If the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), who shows lying as “the key to evil, the road to Hell”, makes some exceptions from this rule, the duty of a believer is to show respect. (Besides, this is the last detail that should be discussed with an unbeliever.)
g. The following verse below should be our guide in such issues. Our attitude, intention and style should be shaped within the framework of the following divine message:
“No no! By your Lord, they will not be believers until they make you their judge in the matters in which they differ, and then they feel no distress in their hearts because of the judgment you have given and they are completely surrendered to you.” (an-Nisa, 4/65)
h. Unfortunately, this permission (which is only an act of tolerance, not a command) has been abused a lot throughout history. People have exceeded the limits of this prophetic permission. They have acted based on their desires. The permission has been used outside its intended purpose. It is almost as if the expected benefit from the permission began to seem as a loss as a result of the abuses. Therefore, it would be useful to suspend the use of this permission today.
46-)
How can we be saved from the sin of slandering?
Yes, buhtan is a kind of slandering.
In Arabic, the word "buhtan" means a lie a person tells to his friend by feeling conceited. The real meaning of the word is based on a phrase uttered by Arabs when a person is astonished.
Accordingly,"buhtan" is a big lie that astonishes a person. In addition, anything wrong that astonishes a person is called buhtan because it is unreal and false. The following hadith is related to the same issue: "If you say something to your brother’s face that is wrong about him, it means you commit buhtan."(see Razi, Mafatih, interpretation of verse 20 of an-Nisa)
In daily speech, the word iftira is common but in law and ethics the words ifk and buhtan are used more commonly; the word qazf is used for a slander of fornication.
In the Quran, the word buhtan is used in the sense of “slander, groundless slander”.(see. an-Nisa 4/20, 112, 156; an-Nur 24/16)
Fakhruddin ar-Razi explains the word buhtan mentioned in verse 112 of the chapter of an-Nisa, “But if any one earns a fault or a sin and throws it on to one that is innocent, He carries (on himself) (Both) a falsehood and a flagrant sin” as “accusing your believing brother of a mistake or bad deed that is fake.”(Mafatihul-Ghayb, the interpretation of the relevant verse)
Bad words never fit a Muslim. Therefore, it is necessary to repent to Allah due to insulting, slandering and cursing whether it is related to a person’s honor or something else. For, something that Allah has forbidden has been committed. In addition, it is necessary to ask for forgiveness from the people one slandered, insulted or cursed. For, the rights of a person have been violated.
The statements against a person’s honor can vary based on the intention of the person uttering it and the way it is perceived in the community. If it is uttered with the intention of slander or if it is perceived like that in the community, it is a slander. If it is uttered with the intention of insult or if it is perceived like that in the community, it is an insult.
In short, a person who utters those words, which are not appropriate to utter in any case, becomes a sinner.
for more information, please click on the link given below;
47-)
What is the decree on hitting a person in the face? Some people say it is makruh to hit a person in the face; is this decree true?
Yes, it is regarded makruh to hit a person in the face in Islam.
According to what Abu Said al-Khudri narrates, the Prophet (pbuh) said, “If one of you fights with his brother, he should avoid hitting him in the face.” (Majmauz-Zawaid, 8/106)
In fact, the most honorable place of all living beings is their face. Therefore, there are narrations prohibiting hitting not only human beings but also animals in the face.
Hz. Jabir said, “The Messenger of Allah told us to avoid branding and hitting the face.” (Muslim, Libas, 106)
According to what Jabir narrates, once the Prophet (pbuh) saw a donkey whose face had been branded. He said, “God damn the person who did it!” (Muslim, Libas, 107).
48-)
Can you explain the statement "Religion is high ethics (good manners)"?
It is not possible to separate ethics from belief in Islam. For, it is the necessity of belief to obey all orders of the Quran. The highest ethics is achieved by obeying those orders. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"The best among the believers are those who have the best manners and character." (Bukhari, Adab, 39)
Accordingly, a person who does not have a perfect understanding and behavior in terms of ethics cannot attain perfection in belief. The Prophet states the following in another hadith:
"Faith has over seventy branches, the most excellent of which is the declaration that there is no god but Allah, and the humblest of which is the removal of a bone from the road. And modesty is a branch of faith." (Abu Dawud, Sunnah, 14)
"None of you will have faith till he wishes for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself." (Bukhari, Iman, 7; Muslim, Iman, 71-72)
"I guarantee a house in the surroundings of Paradise for a man who avoids quarrelling even if he were in the right, a house in the middle of Paradise for a man who avoids lying even if he were joking, and a house in the upper part of Paradise for a man who made his character good." (Abu Dawud, Adab, 7)
"Nothing is placed on the Scale (Mizan) that is heavier than good character. Indeed the person with good character will have attained the rank of the person of fasting and prayer." (Tirmidhi, Birr, 62 )
The Prophet mentioned the superiority of high ethics in the hadiths above and similar ones. He described a good Muslim as follows:
"A Muslim is he from whose hand and tongue the Muslims are safe." (Muslim, Iman, 14)
"The best person among people is the one with a long life and good deeds."
A Companion asks the Messenger of Allah,
- What is the best deed in Islam? The Prophet answered him as follows:
"Giving people food, greeting the people you know and you do not know."
When Abdullah Ibn Mas'ud, one of the notables of Companions, asked the Messenger of Allah a similar question, he said,
"Prayer at its proper time, kindness (birr) to parents, jihad in the Way of Allah."
A community that does only the deeds mentioned above as the basic principles of Islamic ethics and acts in accordance with those principles can always stand upright.
It is necessary to treat people mildly, to remind them their mistakes by using soft words and a style that will not offend them. It should be a principle of a Muslim to warn people by using the same style. The practical ethics of Islam seen in the life of people includes all of the duties of man toward himself, other people, his environment and Allah. When all of them are viewed, it is seen that Islamic ethicsare based on respect, service, mercy, good manners, modesty, controlling one's soul, humbleness, justice and similar traits.
In addition, Islam states that it definitely prohibits feelings and deeds like telling lies, swearing, cursing, mocking, arrogance, tale-bearing, backbiting, hypocrisy, stinginess and jealousy, telling Muslims that they must avoid these feelings and deeds.
(Ahmed AĞIRAKÇA)
49-)
Is it a sin not to convey the greetings of a person? What is the decree about conveying a person’s greeting to others?
Manners of greeting:
Abu Hurayra narrates: The Messenger of Allah said,
"The rider should first greet the pedestrian, and the pedestrian the one who is seated and a small group should greet a larger group." (Bukhari, Isti'dhan, 4-7; Muslim, Salam, 1; Ibn Hanbal, III/444)
Hz. Jabir narrates the following hadith:
"When two pedestrians meet, the one who greets first gets more rewards."
-Salam (greeting) is an important instrument to establish bonds of love among Muslims. It is sunnah to greet a person and it is fard to answer a greeting. The Prophet (pbuh) told us to expand greeting and to greet every Muslim, whether we know or not, and he gave us the glad tiding that we would go to Paradise since our belief would become perfect with it. Therefore, the young should greet the old, the rider should greet the pedestrian, the walking people should greet the sitting people, the ones coming from behind should greet the ones in front of them and one person should greet more than one person.
One should answer a greeting in a better way. If a person says, "as-salamu alaykum", he should be answered as "wa alaykumus-salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu".
It is makruh to greet a person who is not in a position to answer the greeting. One should not greet a person who is eating, performing a prayer, reading the Quran and listening to the sermon in the mosque.
One should not greet (say as-salamu alaykum to) unbelievers. One should not greet a person who violates Allah's order openly and insists on it.
If one person from a group answers the greeting, the others in the group will not be held responsible.
It is necessary to accept the greeting from a person who conveys it, to answer a greeting in a letter by writing an answer or by words when one reads it.
It is a virtuous deed to greet the household while entering home and while leaving.
When one enters an empty place (room/house) he should greet by saying "as salamu alayna wa ala ibadillahis-salihin".
Salam is a good prayer that a believer says for another. Simple words cannot replace the original salam, which means, "Allah's peace, mercy and blessing be upon you." –When two Muslims meet, they shake hands, say salawat for the Prophet (pbuh) and ask about each other’s health. Allah forgives such people before they leave each other.
It is wajib to convey the greeting to the person that it is sent to. However, if he says "alaykum salam" to the person who sends the greeting, it does not become wajib for him to convey the greeting.
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The importance of high ethics... The following is stated in a hadith: "The first thing to be placed on the Scale (Mizan) on the Day of Judgment is high ethics." What is the meaning of a deed being placed on the Scale first or later?
In the hadith, that expression is used in order to state the importance of high ethics. High ethics is also a means for other deeds of worshipping. No matter how much clean food you put in a dirty bowl, it will still be dirty; similarly, no matter how much a person who is deprived of high ethics worships, his deeds of worship may be eliminated due to his bad ethics. Therefore, high ethics must be the most important characteristic of a believer.
There are a lot of hadiths about high ethics:
(1675)- Hz. Abud-Darda narrates: "The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"Nothing is heavier on the believer's Scale on the Day of Judgment than good character. For indeed Allah, Most High, is angered by the shameless obscene person." [Tirmidhi, Birr 62, (2003, 2004); Abu Dawud, Adab 8, (4799) The following is stated in a narration by Tirmidhi:
"A person with high ethics reaches the level of a person with prayers and fasting thanks to his high ethics."]
EXPLANATION:
1. Both hadiths mention the importance of high ethics in the religion of Islam. Belief, which is the most valuable possession of a believer, becomes perfect only with high ethics. Then, he who wants to attain a higher degree in belief, which is the only means of eternal salvation, and to approach perfection should try to make his ethics higher.
2. Both hadiths show that the religion gives importance to our relationships with people. To express the principles of belief with the tongue is not enough in order to be a real believer. It is necessary to strengthen belief with high ethics, which becomes manifest in the form of treating people well.
3. We need to treat the closest people to us in the best way: our family. For, their rights on us are the most and we always see them. If we try to smile, show patience to, tolerate and say nice words to the people we always meet and force ourselves to act like that, it will be a habit of us. Thus, we can treat others in the same way. If a person is used to treating his family badly, it means his acts has become habitually bad. Such a person will naturally and automatically react in a bad way in various cases; even if he treats a person well willingly, it will not be sincere and natural and he cannot always act in the same way.
When it is considered that the family is a hearth of education, that the best education is given in a peaceful environment where love and respect are dominant and that those who are treated well will treat others well, the importance of treating one’s family well will be understood better. Thus, the statement of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) "The best one among you is the one who treats his family in the best way" expresses a natural fact.
4. That high ethics is the heaviest deed on the Scale on the Day of Judgment expresses a natural state and an important fact. For, high ethics completes a believer’s belief and makes it perfect. Belief at the level of perfection affects all deeds of a person and leads him. Such a person tries to do all of his deeds for Allah’s sake and in accordance with the Sunnah.
5. (1676) Hz. Jabir narrates: The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"Indeed the most beloved among you to me, and the nearest to sit with me on the Day of Judgment is the best of you in character. And indeed, the most disliked among you to me, and the one sitting furthest from me on the Day of Judgement are the Thartharun, and the Mutashaddiqun and the Muthafayhiqun."
(Some people who were there asked): "O Messenger of Allah! Who are Muthafayhiqun?"
1. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) often asked people to control their tongues in his talks. For instance, he said, "Whoever can guarantee (the chastity of) what is between his two jaw-bones and what is between his two legs, I guarantee Paradise for him." "He who believes in Allah and the hereafter should say good things or keep silent."
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) did not exaggerate in those insistent warnings. For, it is definite by repeated verses of the Quran that a person will be called to account for his every moment, every deed and hence every word on the Day of Judgment. If a word that a person uttered with his tongue is not in favor of him, it will be against him in the hereafter.
The hadith we are analyzing warns those who speak a lot.Thartharun, mutashaddiqun and muthafayhiqun are words that describe people who speak a lot heedlessly and randomly. There are other words like chatterbox, babbler, chatterer, jabberer, gasbag, windbag and rattlebrain that express the same meaning.
A person who speaks a lot and who is used to speaking a lot cannot always say good things; therefore, he will inevitably talk idly, backbite, tell lies, speak slang and tell nasty stories while talking. They will all be placed on the left scale (scale of sins) on the Day of Judgment. It is significant that the hadith preventing speaking a lot is general.
To sum up, those hadiths teach us that when high ethics is mentioned, the first thing that comes to mind is controlling one’s tongue.
2. Taking into consideration the nuances, that is, small differences, between those words, some scholars attracted attention to what is forbidden in speaking styles. They say what is meant by thartharun is the talkative people who speak more than necessary, what is meant by mutashaddiqun is those who use a pompous language to show their forced eloquence and to show that they are superior to others and even to mock others. As a matter of fact, shidq means cheek pocket; so, mutashaddiq means a person who speaks pompously by filling his cheek pocket.
Muthafayhiqun means people who speak by widening and opening their mouths more than necessary; it is close to mutashaddiq in meaning. It is stated that this attitude originates from conceit and despising others.
In that case, the hadith attracts attention to the issue of speaking, stating that this is an issue that a believer has to give primary importance whether the hadith is interpreted as expressing speaking a lot, which is generally emphasized, or speaking in a way that is different from the majority of the people.
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) states the following:
"The most complete of the believers in faith, is the one with the best character among them. And the best of you are those who are best to your women." [Rawi: Abu Hurayra, Tirmidhi, Rada 11, (1162); Abu Dawud, Sunnah 16, (4682)]
Khulq (or khuluq) is explained as religion, nature and character (moral quality) in the book an-Nihaya. It is the equivalent of temper. Sometimes, the word nature is also used in this sense.
The word khulq expresses the inner appearance and qualities of man, which is man’s soul, in a sense. His outer appearance and qualities are called khalq. The soul has good and bad qualities. Thawab (reward) and iqab (punishment) are related to the qualities of the inner appearance rather than the outer appearance.
According to the following hadith, khulq is an inborn and natural quality:
"Allah shared your ethics among you as He shared your sustenance."
Another hadith stating that temper is inborn is the following sentence the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said to al-Ashajj:
"There are two characteristics that Allah loves in you: mildness and modesty." Ashajj asked,
"O Messenger of Allah! Do I have them since the beginning or did they occur afterwards (after I became a Muslim)?"
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) gave the following answer, which has a separate importance regarding our issue:
"You have them from the beginning." Thereupon, the following statement of gratitude by Ashajj, who was from the tribe of Abdul-Qays, sheds light on our issue:
"Praise be to Allah, who created me with two characteristics that He loves!"
That Ashajj asked whether thosetwo characteristics were old or new and that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) stated that they existed from the beginning in the hadith show that somecharacteristics are inborn.
However, it cannot be denied that some characteristics are obtained later and that it is possible to own good characteristics through will and effort. In fact, ethicists all over the world have discussed throughout history whether character is inborn or obtained later.
Not only the philosophers in the East but also the philosophers in the West took part in this discussion. There are observations and evidences that are based on dogma and nass that support both views. Some philosophers and pedagogues like Aristotle, Locke, Rousseau and Erasmus liken human spirit to a blank tablet, wax and an empty field ready to be sown while Goethe, Schopenhauer and others state that character is inborn and that the education and training given later will not change anything.
"O ye who believe! Save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and Stones..." (at-Tahrim, 66/6).
"Truly he succeeds that purifies it (soul), And he fails that corrupts it." (ash-Shams, 91/9, 10)
The verses above and the hadiths below,
"I have been sent as a teacher",
"Good deeds is a habit",
"Give food and drinks to your children; give them good education",
which attract attention to and encourage pedagogical activities, state that good characteristics that will lead man to salvation will be obtained by education. What would be the meaning of the institution of prophethood, heavenly books, calling people to Islam and guidance if this belief were not essential?
Evaluating the issue in both aspects, Islamic scholars decree that the good characteristics that are inborn need to be supported by willing efforts and be transformed into habits and that bad characteristics need to suppressed. For instance, Hz. Umar said,
"There are ten inborn characteristics in man; nine of them are good, one of them is bad. If the bad one is left unattended, it will harm the others."
Ibnul-Arabi states the following:
"... The number of people created with high ethics is very small. The people created with bad ethics form the majority. For, what is dominant in human nature is evil. Therefore, if man lets himself free to the course of nature without using his thought, power of discrimination, sense of shame and the ability to protect himself, his animal traits will be dominant. For, man is separated from animals with his qualities of thought and discrimination. If he does not use them, he will act like them in their customs; the power of lust with all kinds will invade him; sense of shame will leave him and disappear..."
Holding the same view, Mawardi attracts attention to the fact that it is necessary to be busy with the education of the soul all the time without trusting the intellect, etc., and adds,
"For, good manners are obtained through experience."
)1673) Muadh Ibn Jabal narrates:
"The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said to me,
"O Muadh! Be good-mannered toward people." [Muwatta, Husnul-Khulq 1.]
EXPLANATION:
1. In the origin of the hadith, Muadh describes this advice as the last sentence that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says to him while sending him to Yemen. The version of the hadith in Tirmidhi is as follows: I said, "O Messenger of Allah! Teach me what will be useful for me." He gave me the following advice: "Fear Allah no matter where you are. Do good deeds in return for bad deeds so that you will eliminate bad deeds. Treat people with high ethics."
2. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) sent Hz. Muadh to Yemen as a qadi (judge), tax collector and teacher and with several other authorities and duties. There are other statements and instructions of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) gave to Muadh during this appointment. Thus, the warning mentioned above about treating people well is the last word and instruction of the Prophet to Muadh.
3. The explainers of hadith understand showing a smiling face, lenience and mercy to the people who visit one and sit with him, to show patience while teaching and to show love to everybody – who deserves it – whether young or old when treating people well is mentioned. We say who deserves it because there are also people who are unbelievers, who insist on committing major sins and who oppress others. They might not be influenced by being treated well and it might even cause them to act worse. It is necessary to treat such people justly and authoritatively.
That "doing good deeds" in return for bad deeds is shown as the way of eliminating bad deeds in the hadith is a principle of the understanding of Islamic ethics that should not be forgotten.
(Prof. Dr. İbrahim CANAN, Kutub as-Sittah Translation and Explanation)
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What is the advice of our religion on issues like laughing, smiling and laughter? Are there any manners of laughing?
Answer 1:
Laughing is generally defined as "the stretching of the face in a way that makes the teeth visible as an expression of joy or psychological relief" in classical resources; the slight type of laughing is called smile and the loud one is called laughter. (Raghib al-lsfahani, al-Mufradat, "dhk" item)
It is understood from the examples in the Quran that it is natural for man to laugh in the face of some good news and interesting happenings. (Kindi, Rasail, I, 126) The verse stating that it is Allah who grants laughter and tears (an-Najm, 53/43) expresses the naturalness of laughing and weeping as well as the greatness of the power that creates opposite traits in the same being. There are verses indicating that laughing is an expression or mocking and despising. (al-Mu'minun, 23/ 109-110; az-Zukhruf, 43/47; an-Najm, 53/ 59-60) The polytheists laughed at the believers in the world but the believers will laugh at them in the hereafter (al-Mutaffifin, 83/29-36); on that day, some of the faces will be beaming, laughing and rejoicing while other faces will be covered by blackness. (Abasa, 80/38-41)
Since laughing is a quality that determines human character and is an attitude frequently seen in human relations as something peculiar to human beings, resources related to Islamic ethics have analyzed this concept. There are hadiths stating that the Prophet (pbuh) smiled and laughed in the face of witty remarks, interesting contradictions, surprising developments and some other deeds (see Wensinck, al-Mu’jam, "bsm", "dhk" items) Those hadiths reflect his tolerance along with his lenient character. (see Bukhari, "Adab", 68: "Fadailu Ashabin-Nebi", 6; Muslim, " Fadailus-Sahaba", 22)
However, it is stated in the hadiths in question that the Messenger of Allah’s laughing was in the form of smiling and that he provided joy and peace to the people around with his smile. (Bukhari, "Adab", 68; "Tafsir", 46/2; Muslim, " Fadailus-Sahaba", 134; Tirmidhi, p. 120-124)
According to what is understood from hadiths, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was generally a gracious and cheerful person. That is, he put on a happy face even when he was distressed and did not do anything that would sadden the people around him. When he met the people whom he loved very much, his smile would increase. (see Tirmidhi, Manaqib, 10; Abu Dawud, Istithqa, 2)
Taking also the hadiths into consideration, Islamic ethicists state that laughing is in compliance with human nature, ethics and good manners but that it is difficult to maintain the balance in laughing as well as in humor. Therefore, ethicists attract attention to the fact that not to laugh and to try to suppress laughing under normal conditions make a person unattractive but that to laugh very much harms the personality and solemnity of a person, makes him not to take important matters seriously and leads to heedlessness and that to laugh by making practical jokes and by making fun of people and backbiting them lead to hostility among people. (see Mawardi, Adabud-Dunya wad-Din, Beirut 1978, p. 302; Ghazzali, Ihya (Beirut), III, 127-132, 147; İslam Ansiklopedisi, DİA Gülme item)
Answer 2:
There are differences among smiling, having a smiling face, laughing a little, laughing a lot, laughing out loud, smirking, laughing unnecessarily, laughing sarcastically, laughing jeeringly, making others laugh and making others laugh unnecessarily. None of them is the same as another. Some of them are encouraged and some of them are regarded permissible while we are advised to avoid others. Let us deal with them separately:
1. It is sunnah to smile, to have a smiling face and to laugh a little. One gets the reward of sadaqah with them. They give peace to the heart and the spirit. They bind people together, forming trust, warmness and closeness among them. They increase friendship, end enmity and prevent resentment. They eliminate the hatred, grudge, fury, anger and resentment, which come from Satan.
The Prophet (pbuh) smiled and had a smiling face. He would not sulk in the presence of people. When he was angry, he would not show it. He said,
“It is a sadaqah for you to greet people with a smiling face.” (Jamius-Saghir, 4/1513)
“Allah loves a person who is lenient and who has a smiling face.” (Jamius-Saghir, 2/503)
“You cannot please everybody with your wealth. Then, please them with your smiling face and good manners.” (Jamius-Saghir, 2/661)
“Allah does not like a person who pulls a long face at his believing brother.”(Jamius-Saghir, 2/500)
“Fear Allah and do not underestimate any favor even if it is in the form of giving some water to a person who wants water or welcoming yourbelieving brother with a smiling face.”(Muslim, Birr, 144; Tirmidhi, At’ima, 30)
2. Laughing a lot, laughing out loud, smirking, laughing unnecessarily, laughing sarcastically, laughing jeeringly, making others laugh and making others laugh unnecessarily are forbidden by degrees.
“The Prophet (pbuh) kept silent a lot and laughed a little.”(Musnad, 5/86)
The Quran does not approve of laughing unnecessarily:
“And will ye laugh and not weep!” (an-Najm, 53/60)
The hadiths that warn us regarding the issue are as follows:
“Laugh a little because laughing very much kills (hardens) the heart.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd, 2; Ibn Majah, Zuhd, 19)
“If you knew what I know, you would laugh a little and weep a lot. You would go up to high mountains and beg Allah because you do not know whether you will attain salvation or not.”(Jamius-Saghir, 4/1427
“He who commits a sin by laughing will enter Hell.” (Jamius-Saghir, 4/1534)
“There are two kinds of laughing: There is one kind that Allah loves and there is another kind that Allah punishes a person because of it. The one that Allah loves is as follows: A person meets a believing brother that he wants to see and becomes happy due to seeing him. The one that Allah punishes a person because of it is as follows: A person utters an offensive, hurting, biting, despising, mocking, vulgar or bad word in order to laugh and make others laugh. He falls into a hellhole of seventy layers down.” (Jamius-Saghir, 3/1149)
“I am surprised by a person who chases the world though death chases him. I am surprised by a person who acts heedlessly though he is not left unattended. I am surprised by a person who laughs out loud though he does not know whether Allah is pleased with him or not.”(Jamius-Saghir, 3/1174)
“I have just been shown Paradise and Hell at the edge of that wall. I have never seen the important outcomes of doing good deeds and avoiding bad deeds before. If you knew what I know, you would laugh a little and weep a lot.” (Bukhari, Salah, 51; Muslim, Fadail, 134)
“Eating before getting hungry, sleeping before feeling sleepy, smirking without seeing anything funny, screaming in the face of a misfortune, playing a musical instrument illegitimately at the time of boons are things that bring Allah’s wrath.” (Jamius-Saghir, 3/1313)
“Allah regards the following six things ugly:
1. Doing unnecessary things while performing a prayer,
2. Rubbing it in after a charity,
3. Doing things that could endanger fasting,
4. Laughing next to graves,
5. Entering a mosque as junub,
6. Looking inside a house without the permission of its owner.” (Jamius-Saghir, 2/479)
It is permissible to laugh normally unless it aims to humiliate and mock others and unless it is not exaggerated. However, it is not appropriate to laugh out loud and to make programs that last for hours in order to make people laugh. For, laughing excessively might be the result of being heedless of Allah, not being a joking, witty or smiling person.
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What does justice in ethics mean?
Islamic ethicists developed the issue of justice in ethics, in which Greek philosophers were also interested, by benefitting from the resources of the Quran and the Sunnah; thus, “the philosophy of Islamic ethics” emerged.
According to the explanations of Islamic ethicists, lust (desire), fury (anger) and intellect (understanding, knowing, thinking) are indispensable powers that Allah found appropriate for human beings. When those powers are used in compliance with the purpose of creation, they make people perfect and gain them high ethics (virtues). When they are used extremely in both ends, they harm the person and other people; they disgrace man, depriving him of virtues and values.
The extreme use of the power of intellect by intelligent people can occur in the form of deceiving people by misusing the intellect, driving them into difficult positions and reaching bad aims by making use of other people’s stupidity. The opposite extreme (minimum) use of the intellect is stupidity, that is, not to use the mind as it is necessary and to act like a stupid person. A person who keeps away from both extreme ends, who uses the intellect in accordance with its purpose of creation, who thinks, knows and reads truly has the attribute of wisdom.
The extreme use of the power of fury (anger) makes man an oppressor, a despot, a person who uses his power beyond measure, who suppresses the weak and hence a person who lacks virtues. The opposite extreme (minimum) use of fury is cowardice. The moderate form of fury is bravery, which is in accordance with its creation. Those who have this attribute protect themselves and their own rights and try to prevent others from being oppressed, crushed and exploited by oppressors. Heroes of ethics are the people who are brave.
One aspect of the power of lust (desire) is related to sex and the other is related to nutrition. The extreme form of lust, which is sex and sexual desire, makes a person unchaste, dishonest, a rapist and a fornicator; the opposite extreme (minimum) use of lust causes this power to be ignored, not to use it when it is necessary and when it is legitimate and to deprive a person of a family. Those who use lust moderately are chaste people; the virtue obtained thanks to this is called chaste.
When the lust (desire) to eat and drink is used moderately, healthy nutrition occurs. Healthy nutrition causes man to be strong and healthy enough for the world life and enables him to fulfill his duties.
To use the powers of fury, lust and intellect moderately (without going to extremes) makes a person have three virtues: bravery, chastity and wisdom. These three virtues represent “justice in ethics”.
The harm caused by being deprived of bravery, chastity and wisdom or lack of these three virtues on the individual and the community was the biggest problem of humanity in history and it is still so today.
The prerequisite for both “justice in law” and justice in community (social justice) is justice in ethics. If there is no justice in ethics, there will be no justice in law and in community.
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Is it permissible to talk behind an unbeliever’s back (to backbite him)?
It is definitely haram to talk behind a Muslim’s back. However, as for a non-Muslim, it is divided into two:
1. A non-Muslim who is in a state of war with Muslims.
2. A non-Muslim who is in a state of peace with Muslims. (Like the Christians and Jews of today.)
It is not haram to backbite non-Muslims who are in a state of war with Muslims. It is necessary to speak ill of them so that the state of the war will be favorable for us. There is no sin in doing it.
However, the state of the non-Muslims who are in a state of peace with Muslims is not the same. It can be permissible to backbite them (only by separating a person and his attributes). It is permissible to backbite such a person not as a perfect being that Allah created but the unbelief added to that perfect being by that person in a sense that will alienate people from unbelief.
It means it is permissible to backbite the attributes of a person, not the person himself.
We learn from the fatwas of Ghazali that the aim is not to backbite people but to state the evil of the wrong things in their faith and life, and hence it is permissible.
As for the minorities living among Muslims, they are under the guarantee of Islam like Muslims in all aspects. Islam does not regard it permissible to backbite these people, whom it has taken under its protection; Islam does not allow its guarantee to be violated. If they are backbitten, it is necessery to ask forgiveness from them.
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What should our attitude be toward junk food?
The general rules in nutrition according to Islam are as follows:
Due to the importance of eating and drinking blessings in human health and life, the Qur'an and the sunnah of the Prophet S.A.W guide humanity in this matter.
Food and drinks of man, who is created as the most honored of the beings, should be valuable in a way that suits him. For this reason, Allah SWT and the Messenger of Allah have informed man about the healthiest foods and beverages of the earth and forbade the harmful ones.
Studies show that halal foods and beverages are in harmony with the human body, that they are virtually coded and healing, that forbidden foods and beverages are not compatible with the body, that they are harmful and that they disrupt the body system.
General rules on food and beverage can be summarized as follows:
1. Food and beverage should be halal and clean.
2. Waste should be avoided.
3. Eating while full should be avoided.
4. One should not sit down to a meal before getting hungry.
5. Eating enough to fill one-third of the stomach at most.
6. Starting with basmala (bismillah) and eating with the right hand.
7. Avoid eating or drinking too hot or too cold food and beverages and blowing into them.
8. One should not eat while standing or leaning.
The subject of healthy eating and drinking is summarized in the following two hadiths of the Prophet Muhammad SAW:
"We are such a tribe that we do not sit down to a meal without getting hungry, and when we get off before getting satiated."(as- Sirah al- Halabiyya, 3/299)
“A few bites are enough for mankind to straighten his waist. However, if one still must eat, he should divide his stomach into three, one-third for food, one-third for water, and one-third for breathing.”(Tirmidhi, Zuhd (Asceticism), 47 )
The Prophet would not hurry while eating. He would not eat two similar dishes at the same time. He would not have two hot dishes or two cold dishes at the same time.
One of the miraculous behaviors of the Prophet Muhammad SAW about nutrition is that he did not force himself and his ummah to eat a single type of food. He would have various foods that the body needs, which modern medicine strongly recommends today. He did not distinguish between animal origin and herbal foods, which are the two sources of nutrition. It is a medical fact that people who are nourished solely on vegetable or solely on animal origin foods will have health problems. Therefore, our Prophet SAW did not neglect either of them, he sometimes ate both of them together and sometimes separately or diversified.
His eating and drinking style and form were also health-centered. When he ate, he would sit cross-legged or sit on the left knee while erecting the right knee. He did not welcome eating or drinking while standing or leaning.
Islam, the religion of measure and balance, has forbidden to go to extremes in terms of nutrition too, and has ordered adequate and balanced nutrition in this regard. It is known that there is a very close relationship between the foods we eat and our health. Overeating and drinking is shown as the cause of many diseases.
It is also a medical fact that the main cause of many diseases such as respiratory diseases, vascular occlusion and stiffness, gallstones, heart failure, snoring, varicose veins, abdominal hernias, intestinal diseases, menstrual disorders, infertility, etc. is overeating and overfilling the stomach.
It is known that most of the diseases in this age are caused by either malnutrition or overeating and drinking. Islam solved this problem with three miraculous words of the Qur'an and a hadith. Allah says “Eat, drink: but waste not by excess.” (al-A’raf, 31)
Consequently, we can say that it is wajib for man to eat as much as he needs; eating more than necessary is permissible and waste is forbidden (haram).The main criterion in this regard is found in the sunnah of the Prophet Muhammad SAW.
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Does to cry with the fear of Allah mean to cry by shedding tears or to feel sad in the heart?
To cry with the fear of Allah can be by shedding tears or feeling sad in the heart.
We attribute most of the crimes and sins that are committed to the lack of fear of Allah in the people who commit them. We say, “If those people had feared Allah and avoided His penalty, they would not have done so.”How should fear from Allah be? How can we associate a discipline based on terror and fear only with the tolerance of Islam and the endless mercy of Allah Almighty?
Believers are described as follows in the Quran:
“For, Believers are those who, when Allah is mentioned, feel a tremor in their hearts, and when they hear His signs rehearsed, find their faith strengthened, and put (all) their trust in their Lord.”1
As it is understood from the verse above, there is a close relationship and connection between the strengthening of the faith and the settlement of the fear of Allah in the hearts. What does strengthening of the faith as the verses of Allah are read mean? Elmalılı Hamdi Yazır explains the issue as follows:
“As evidences from ilm (knowledge) and deeds increase, investigative belief develops. Close knowledge and belief increase.”2
Investigative belief has levels. The level ofilm al-yaqin (knowledge of certainty) opposes doubts by evidences. Imitative belief, that is, belief that is transferred from parents and that is not based on deep research, can sometimes be defeated by a slight doubt but a belief that is obtained by evidences will not be harmed even by numerous doubts.
The second level of investigative belief is ayn al-yaqin (vision of certainty); it also have levels in it.It has as many levels as the beautiful names of Allah that are manifest in the universe and their levels. A believer will have a sound and steadfast belief based on his ability to see and read those manifestations. In the highest levels of this stage, man reaches a degree that can read the universe like the Quran. That is, for instance, he can read Allah Almighty’s names like al-Khaliq (the Creator), al-Musawwir (theShaper of Beauty) , al-Muzayyin (the Adorner), al-Mulawwin (the Giver of Color), al-Jamil (the Beautiful) andar-Rahim (the All-Merciful) on a flower. He watches the manifestation of the names of the Creator that creates, shapes, adorns, colors, beautifies them and shows them compassion and mercy.
The third level is named as haqq al-yaqin (absolute certainty). A person who reaches this level has passed the veils that surround the realms of beings and has attained a belief that will not be shaken in the face of the attacks by armies of doubts.3
The belief of prophets and spiritual guides have this depth. The belief of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), who was the addressee of Allah Almighty’s beauty and speech in Miraj (Ascension), and Abdulqadir Ghaylani, who followed his trace and improved his spirit so much as to observe the High Throne from the earth, can be given as examples of belief at this level.
This belief, which is like the ocean, can be attained only through ilm. That ilm definitely has to be an ilm that leads man to belief. Is it possible to describe the fear and shivering felt by those who ascend to those levels of belief with ilm as if they are in the presence of Allah Almighty?
“Those truly fear Allah, among His Servants, who have knowledge.”4
The verse above expresses this reality. This respect and fear becomes manifest in every believer based on the degree of their belief.
For, as man knows his Lord through ilm, his love and respect to Him increases. For, the endless perfection above all those levels of perfection definitely deserves endless respect. A shivering mixed with joy encompasses you in the presence of a spiritually great person who has an unreachable degree with his superior solemnity and unique personality; think of the mood in which you will in the presence of Allah Almighty, who has a perfection endless times superior to that person.
Allah has endless compassion and mercy as well as endless jealousy and dignity/might. As it is repeated in many verses of the Quran, Allah is both Rahim (all-Merciful) and Aziz (Mighty). He embraces the whole realm of beings with His endless compassion and mercy as a necessity of his name ar-Rahim; on the other hand, He punishes those who rebel against His laws and touch His dignity with their rebellion.
Therefore, a person who is in the presence of Allah Almighty is overwhelmed by the attraction of that endless mercy on the one hand and his heart shivers at the thought of the terror of His wrath on the other hand. Is it possible for such a person to rebel against Allah’s orders and to violate His prohibitions?
This fear leads man to Allah just like love. As Badiuzzaman Said Nursi puts it,
“To fear the Glorious Creator means finding a way to His compassionate mercy, and taking refuge in it. Fear is a whip; it drives you into the embrace of His mercy. It is well-known that a mother gently scares her infant, for example, and draws it to her breast. The fear is most pleasurable for the child, because it drives him to her tender embrace.Whereas the tenderness of all mothers is but a flash of Divine mercy. That means there is a supreme pleasure in fear of Allah.”5
Thus, the reason why man was given the feeling of fear is to lead him to Allah. Therefore, if we use this feeling in other places by driving it away from its real purpose, we will incur great losses. When we use our love in wrong places, that love becomes a feeling that suffocates us in agonies by being rejected by the people we love, by being insulted by them and by being forced to leave them though we love them. Similarly, using the feeling of fear in wrong places transforms man’s life into a dungeon. For, the beings that are not worth fearing but that we fear can do nothing to us but cause us to live in derogation. They can neither help us nor soothe our fear. On the contrary, they destroy us by turning away from us by an insensitive mercilessness or increasing their attacks.
The relationship of the feeling of fear with belief and tawakkul (trust in Allah) is explained as follows in Sözler (Words):
“In fact, for a worshipper with a truly illuminated heart, it is possible that even if the globe of the earth became a bomb and exploded, it would not frighten him. He would watch it with pleasurable wonder as a marvel of the Eternally Besought One’s power. But when a famous degenerate philosopher with a so-called enlightened mind but no heart saw a comet in the sky, he trembled on the ground, and exclaimed anxiously: ‘Isn’t that comet going to hit the earth?’ (On one occasion, America was quaking with fear at such a comet, and many people left their homes in the middle of the night.)”6
Footnotes:
1. al-Anfal, 2.
2. Hak Dini Kur'ân Dili, 3:2367
3. Bediüzzaman Said Nursi. Emirdağ Lahikası-I, p.102, 103.
4. Fatir, 28
5. Sözler (Words), p. 331
6. ibid.
(Mehmed Paksu, Çağın Getirdiği Sorular)
56-)
Is it necessary to give sadaqah again if it is not given to a person who is in need?
It is not necessary to give sadaqah that is given as a voluntary donation and that is not fard or wajib again.
A Muslim gets the reward of sadaqah no matter to whom he gives it.
However, it is better for such a person to give sadaqah again if he is well-off.
As a matter of fact, according to what is reported from Abu Hurayra, the Messenger of Allah peace be upon him stated the following:
“Once, a man said,
- I will give sadaqah. He went out with his sadaqah and unknowingly gave it to a thief. The next day, people said,
- Oh! A thief was given a sadaqah last night. The man said,
- O Allah! Praise be to You. I will give sadaqah again. Then, he went out again with his sadaqah and gave it to a prostitute! The next day, people said,
- Unbelievable! A prostitute was given a sadaqah last night. The man said,
- O Allah! Praise be to You that I gave sadaqah to a prostitute. I will give sadaqah again. Then, he went out again with his sadaqah and gave it to a rich person. The next day, people said,
- How strange! A rich person was given a sadaqah last night. The man said,
- O Allah! Praise be to You that I gave sadaqah to a thief, a prostitute and a rich person.
The man was addressed as follows in his dream:
- The sadaqah you gave to the thief might make him abstain from stealing. It might make the prostitute abstain from what she does and cause her to become a chaste woman. The rich person might take a lesson from it and spend his wealth, which Allah has given him, on the needy people.”(Bukhari, Zakah 14; Muslim, Zakah 78)
It is understood from other narrations that this incident took place during the time of Sons of Israel. The fact that the sadaqah given to the thief, the prostitute and the rich astonished people greatly shows that at that time sadaqah were given only to the needy people who were religious.
The fact that the sadaqahs given by the man were accepted by Allah show that Allah the criterion of God Almighty related to accepting sadaqah has never changed and that even if a sadaqah given with good intentions goes to someone who does not deserve it, Allah will accept it. Even if an act done with good intentions leads to a wrong result, God Almighty will look at the sincerity of the servant and accept the good deeds done for His sake.
In addition, attention is attracted to another effect of charity given for the sake of Allah on people in the hadith.
A person to whom sadaqah is given and who is on the wrong path will evaluate his situation in the face of this goodness, will realize that the path he has taken is wrong, and will return to the true path with Allah's help if he is a sane person. That is why, it is stated that sadaqah given to a thief, a prostitute and a rich person at night being unaware of who they are will have a good effect on them.
As it is valid in every era, some people today resort to bad deeds such as theft and prostitution for sustenance or for the people they have to look after.
If wealthy people who have been granted the grace and benevolence of God Almighty take care of the poor and needy people around them and "distribute the wealth that Allah has given them to the needy" as it is stated in the hadith, many problems will be solved before they occur and many good people will save their honor and chastity from being harmed.
The issue of giving sadaqah secretly is important for both the taker and the giver. Giving financial aid to the poor in their homes as some philanthropists do today and hence not showing the aid to anyone, first of all, will save the poor and the needy from begging. On the other hand, the person who does charity benefits from his help spiritually as the danger of show off will disappear.
When the benevolent man from Sons of Israel saw that the sadaqahs he gave did not go to the people who deserved them - according to him - he praised Allah; thus, he wanted to say, “O Allah! Whatever happened happened based on Your will, not my will. Everything you do has a reason.” Thus, he stated that he consented to divine predestination. Accordingly,
- It is very valuable to do deeds for the sake of Allah and to give sadaqah secretly.
- Even if the sadaqah given with good intentions does not go to proper people, Allah will accept it.
- When a person realizes that the sadaqah he has given has not reached the people who need it, he can give sadaqah again if he is well-off.
- Everyone should submit to the destiny designed by Allah and know that nothing can be done against His will.
- It is not necessary to look for a good man to do a good deed.
57-)
What is the decree on ghiybah (backbiting)? Is it appropriate to continue backbiting thinking that one asks for forgiving from others? How will one be forgiven by others in the hereafter?
It is a nice thing when people ask forgiveness from each other and forgive mutually. It is a great virtue for a Muslim to forgive everybody and waive his rights. Allah is the forgiver and He loves those who forgive others. It is a nice thing for a person to ask forgiveness from others and to forgive them.
However, a person must not backbite thinking, "I ask for forgiveness and forgive people anyway." A person who acts like that will be held responsible by Allah and will be a sinner. In backbiting, both violation of the rights of others and the aspect of sin due to disobeying Allah’s prohibition exist. Even if a person asks for forgiveness from the person he backbites, he has to repent. Therefore, man will be held responsible if he continues backbiting thinking that he asks for forgiving from others.
The Quran and the Sunnah prohibit backbiting:
"…And spy not on each other behind their backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, ye would abhor it?..." (al-Hujurat, 49/12);
"Backbiting is mentioning your brother in a way that he does not like." (Tirmidhi, Birr, 23; Darimi, Riqaq, 6; Malik, Muwatta, Kalam,10; Ahmad b. Hanbal, II / 384, 386).
To tell others about one’s brother’s mistakes means to say things that he does not like; therefore, it is haram to mention his mistakes through the tongue.
Besides, gestures and facial expressions, implications, signs, writing and similar deeds that indicate backbiting are also regarded as backbiting. For instance, to show by hand that somebody is tall or short, to write something about the mistakes of a person are regarded as backbiting.
To approve backbiting is alsoregarded as backbiting. A person who keeps quiet when somebody backbites others is regarded to share the sin of backbiting. He who cannot resist the person who backbites with his tongue has to deny it through his heart. (Imam Ghazzali, Zubdatul-Ihya, Translated by: Ali Özek, İstanbul 1969, 362, 363). The Messenger of Allah states the following:
"If a person does not help a believer who is insulted in his presence though he has the power to help, Allah will disgrace him in front of people on the Day of Judgment." (Tabarani)
"If a person prevents the mistakes of a person from being uttered in his absence, Allah guarantees to hide his mistakes on the Day of Judgment." (Ibn Abid-Dunya)
"O those who believe only with their tongues, not with their hearts! Do not backbite Muslims and do not search their sins. If a person searches the mistakes and sins of his brother, Allah will search his mistakes. If Allah searches the mistakes of a person, He will disgrace him even if he is in his house." (Abu Dawud, Ibn Abid-Dunya)
The institution of brotherhood in the religion of Islam is established by the following divine order:
"The Believers are but a single Brotherhood: So make peace and reconciliation between your two (contending) brothers; and fear Allah, that ye may receive Mercy." (al-Hujurat, 49/10)
This makes the Islamic community a strong community that is elevated on this brotherhood of belief. There is no backbiting in such a community. For, as the Prophet (pbuh) says,
"A believer is the mirror of another believer. Believers are like two hands; one of them cleans the other."
Those criteria keep the community away from mischief and dissension.
58-)
What is the sin of listening behind the door? What are the verses related to this issue?
It is not permissible to peep in order to find out about the sin of a person who commits a sin secretly in his house and keeps his door closed; it is not permissible to swoop on such a person or to tell others about his sin.
Allah states the following:
"O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin: And spy not on each other behind their backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, ye would abhor it...But fear Allah: For Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful." (al-Hujurat, 49/12)
When Hz. Umar was the caliph, he heard sounds coming from a house. He climbed the wall, looked inside and saw the host doing something bad. When he wanted to prevent the host from that bad deed, the man said,
"O leader of the believers! I have committed one sin, but you have committed three sins." Hz. Umar asked, “What are they?” The man answered as follows:
"Allah said, ‘Spy not on each other behind their backs.’ (al-Hujurat, 49/12) However, you have spied. Allah said, ‘It is no virtue if ye enter your houses from the back’ (al-Baqara, 2/189) but you entered by climbing the wall. God Almighty said, ‘O ye who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until ye have asked permission and saluted those in them: that is best for you, in order that ye may heed (what is seemly).’ (an-Nur, 24/27) "
In the face of this defense, Hz. Umar did not apply a penalty but laid it as a condition for the man to repent to be forgiven. Therefore, Hz. Umar asked the Companions for consultation while delivering a sermon on the pulpit if the caliph or a judge could apply a penalty if he himself sees a crime without looking for witnesses, Hz. Ali said two just witnesses were necessary even in such a case. (Imam Ghazali, Ihyau Ulumid-Din, Translated by Ali Arslan, Istanbul 1972, V, 390, 391)
Verses between twenty-seven and thirty-three of the chapter of an-Nur states the manners and rules of house visits by believers and the principles of dressing for women. The religion of Islam protects the wealth, life, home and workplace of everybody from violation. Therefore, it prohibits entering a house without greeting, getting permission and having an acquaintance with the owner of the house. On the other hand, it regards peeping a house through the door and windows a sin. However, it is stated that desolate houses can be entered without permission if it is necessary:
"O ye who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until ye have asked permission and saluted those in them: that is best for you, in order that ye may heed (what is seemly). If ye find no one in the house, enter not until permission is given to you: if ye are asked to go back, go back: that makes for greater purity for yourselves: and Allah knows well all that ye do. It is no fault on your part to enter houses not used for living in, which serve some (other) use for you: And Allah has knowledge of what ye reveal and what ye conceal." (Nur, 24/27-29).
TAJASSUS (SPYING)
It means searching the inside, hidden parts of an affair and mistakes of a person; curiosity to search.
The word tajassus is an Arabic word derived from the verb jassa. The word jasus (spy/agent) is derived from the same verb.
Tajassus is generally used for searching bad deeds and mistakes. The word tahassus is generally used for good deeds. As a matter of fact, Allah states that Hz. Yaqub addressed his sons as follows using the word tahassus: “O my sons! Go ye and enquire about Joseph and his brother, and never give up hope of Allah´s Soothing Mercy...” (Yusuf, 12/87). However, both words can be used in the sense of searching bad deeds and mistakes. Awzai states that tajassus means searching anything and that tahassus means eavesdropping or listening behind the door. (Ibn Kathir, Tafsirul-Qur'anil-Azim, Istanbul 1985. VII, 358)
The word tajassus is mentioned only once in the Quran:
"O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin: And spy not on each other behind their backs. Would any of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? Nay, ye would abhor it...But fear Allah: For Allah is Oft-Returning, Most Merciful." (al-Hujurat, 49/12)
Allah addresses believers in the verse above and wants them to keep away from three harmful things. Those three harmful things are suspicion (having bad thoughts about others), spying and backbiting.
As it is seen, tajassus is one of the things forbidden, prohibited by the Quran. The verse also describes the attributes of a believer. Accordingly, believers keep away from suspicion (having bad thoughts about others), spying and backbiting. They differ from others with those nice qualities.
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) prohibited tajassus and advised people to keep away from it. Thus, he informed us that tajassus was something harmful and bad. The hadiths narrated regarding the issue are as follows:
"Keep away from having bad thoughts about others because it is the worst lie. Do not spy on one another and do not search the secret affairs of one another; do not eavesdrop; do not compete one another; do not be jealous of one another; do not hate one another; do not turn your backs to one another. O slaves of Allah! Be brothers." (Ibn Kathir, Tafsir VII, 357)
"If you search people’s mistakes, you will cause mischief." (Ibn Kathir, Tafsir, VII, 358)
"O community of people, who believed by their tongue and whose hearts belief did not enter! Do not backbite Muslims. Do not search for their faults. If anyone searches for their faults, Allah will search for his fault. If Allah searches for the fault of anyone, He disgraces him in his house." (Abu Dawud, Adab, 40; see also Tirmidhi, Birr, 84)
"If a person does not help a Muslim in a place where he will be disgraced and leaves him alone, Allah will leave him alone in a place where he will ask for help. If a person helps a Muslim in a place where he will be disgraced, Allah will help him in a place where he will ask for help" (Abu Dawud, Adab, 41)
A man went to Ibn Mas'ud and said, "raki (alcoholic drink) drips from the beard of such and such a man." Ibn Mas'ud answered him as follows: "We were prohibited from spying. However, we can catch him when he drinks openly." Mujahid made the following explanation regarding the issue: What is meant by the verse “spy not on each other” is "take what is revealed and leave what is kept secret". (Sayyid Qutub, Fi Zilalil-Quran, Beirut 1971)
As it is understood from the hadiths above, man has inviolable and untouchable things: honor, dignity, rights and freedom. One of them is searching secret affairs. Thus, Islam orders showing respect to the rights of individuals perfectly. In Islam, man is ordered to act in a way that fits human honor and he is not allowed to be harassed.
Nureddin TURGAY
59-)
What will be the otherworldly benefits of believers’ loving one another?
According to what is reported from Numan Ibn Bashir, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"Believers resemble one body as regards their being merciful among themselves and showing love among themselves and being kind. If any part of the body is not well then the whole body shares the sleeplessness and fever with it."
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) sheds light on the Islamic community of that time and guides us with the light emitting from his unique words. He never spoke out of his own desire. He always acted in accordance with the order of Lord. He never uttered useless words.
He integrated and combined a community whose individuals were so bad-tempered and stern, and who were enemies of one another in such a nice way that humanity never saw and will never see such a self-sacrificing community that declared one another brothers.
There was a great change. Those brutal, vindictive and stern people became very lofty after they met the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) thanks to his guidance. The guidance and education given by the Messenger of Allah made Umar, who came to kill him with his sword, the symbol of justice. He eliminated the wars between tribes, feuds and other similar bad practices that prevented the members of the community from trusting one another.
We understand from the hadith that believers should help one another regarding very important issues like loving, mercy and protection. In that case, believers should definitely love, forgive, pity and help one another, and show mercy to one another. For, the establishment of a community with healthy individuals, the salvation of the ummah and the wellbeing of the hearts can be possible only when such people come together.
As a matter of fact, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) laid the foundations of the most magnificent community in the world by establishing brotherhood between Makkan muhajirs (migrants) and Ansar (helpers) of Madinah after the Migration. People were united so much that they competed one another to share the things they possessed like their houses, fields and orchards with their new brothers. Consequently, this community began something perfect that the generations after them would follow with pride.
As the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) expresses in his nice simile, the cause of sleeplessness is the pain felt in any organ. When a person is sleepless, the severity of inflammatory diseases increases. A disorder that occurs in an organ, even if it is small, will definitely affect and disturb the other organs. Those organs, whose names are different, are parts that form the body. It is not possible for them to be independent from one another, or rather, to exist without one another. To think them as separate organs is nonsense like to think that a body can exist without a head or a heart. Therefore, it is necessary to think of the body as a whole rather than as independent organs. Similarly, instead of regarding believers as separate individuals, is it not necessary to regard the Islamic world as a whole, to act like that and to evaluate the favorable and unfavorable incidents through that viewpoint? Is it not necessary to treat the disorders at once?
It does not fit a real believer not to show mercy and compassion to his believing brother, not to think about his problem by ignoring the problems of others, to watch the incidents that take place nearby and that affect all Muslims badly without doing anything. According to the hadith above, if a Muslim anywhere in the world suffers and is in agony, we have to share his feelings and look for cures to eliminate his problems.
A real believer cannot live lazily and insensitively when his brothers are in pain and agony. He cannot have fun when his brothers shed tears and suffer. He cannot eat and drink abundantly and wear various clothes while his brothers go hungry for days. He cannot sleep comfortably in his cozy bed as if nothing has happened while his brothers are deprived of all of them.
Allah tests us and states in His book that one cannot enter Paradise without being tested. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) says,
"The best of the deeds is to love for Allah and to hate for Allah."
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) also states the following:
"A Muslim is a brother of another Muslim; he does not oppress him; he does not leave him alone. Whoever fulfills the need of his brother, Allah will fulfill his need in the hereafter. Whoever relieves a Muslim of hardship, Allah will relieve him of hardship on the Day of Judgment. Whoever screens the sin of a Muslim, Allah will screen his sin on the Day of Resurrection.”
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) did not educate only the people living in his age. He educates us every day with his timeless statements and deeds. Nowadays, we need the education of the Messenger of Allah more than any other time. The negative incidents taking place in the Islamic world recently shows us how much we have moved away from this divine education.
How can a believer who reads, understands and practices the hadith above pull a gun on his believing brother, hate him and bomb his mosque? The Messenger of Allah likened believers to a bodyas regards love, being merciful among themselves and protecting one another. Where is that unity? We are in agony because of breaking into pieces. The doors we knock on in order to be treated deteriorate our wounds. In fact, there is no need to look for a treatment because the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) declares loudly the treatment from fifteen centuries ago.
The Islamic world is a big body, a body with diseases in its various parts. Those who caused the disease offered various treatments to solve it. The treatments they apply aim to eliminate the diseased parts.
The diagnosis is clear. The Islamic world is in the throes of death due to the blows from inside and outside. An urgent treatment is necessary without losing any time. A true treatment can be done only by a real and true doctor. It is a great blessing that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), who is the greatest doctor, educator and who made the greatest change in the world and moved the universe so to speak, gave us the prescription centuries ago. He personally showed us how to unite, integrate and get well, in short, everything that we need and the only way of treatment:
“Muhammad is the messenger of Allah; and those who are with him are strong against Unbelievers, (but) compassionate amongst each other. Thou wilt see them bow and prostrate themselves (in prayer), seeking Grace from Allah and (His) Good Pleasure. On their faces are their marks, (being) the traces of their prostration..." (al-Fath, 48/29)
Our Lord virtually states something similar in the chapter of al-Maida:
"They are lowly, modest with the believers, mighty and honorable against the rejecters. If you give up belief in and obedience to Allah and His Messenger and practicing the religion and lifestyle shown by them, know it very well that Allah will eliminate you and produce people who arelowly with the believers, mighty against the rejecters, fighting in the way of Allah, and never afraid of the reproaches of such as find fault. He will love them as they will love Him.”
Thus, having those characteristics, the brave Muslims around the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) were adherent to Allah and His Messenger with the most sincere feelings and they were very merciful to one another, sacrificing their possessions for one another; on the other hand, they were very mighty and honorable against the unbelievers, resisting them firmly. They did not allow anyone to defame the dignity and honor of Islam. Our Lord wanted exactly this from them.
Salvation for both individuals and the community is possible only through Islam. There is no need to look for treatment anywhere else and in wrong ways. We have already lost a lot of time regarding the issue. The ummah has to use the prescription that it has as soon as possible. There is a need for conscious associations formed by individuals who are adherent and loyal to one another.
The Islamic world has been wounded in the very important organs like the head and the heart and has been suffering a lot for a long time. We are like a big body in which the connection among the organs has weakened due to lack of reactions or delayed reactions or has almost been lost. For, we present it as if it is a skill or strategic policy to the believers to ask for permission of the enemies outside the body for medical and humanitarian aid.
60-)
Is there a hadith meaning a guest comes with ten shares (of sustenance); he eats one share and leaves the remaining shares?
It is a proverb. However, we think it is based on some hadith narrations that have a close meaning to that statement.
As a matter of fact, the following is stated in a hadith:
“A guest comes with his sustenance; he becomes a means of forgiveness of the sins of the hosts and leaves.” (Ajluni, 1/88, 2/36)
Sahawi states that the chain of narrators of that hadith, which Daylami narrated, is weak but that it is supported by some other narrations; he indicates that it could be sound. (al-Maqasidul-Hasana-Shamila-1/21)
The Prophet (pbuh) said, "He who believes in Allah and the hereafter should entertain his guest." (Bukhari, Adab, 85; Muslim, Iman, 74) The Prophet (pbuh) also states that goodness and blessings will arrive a household who entertain guests, very quickly. (Ibn Majah, Ati'ma, 55)
The Prophet (pbuh) warns those who evade entertaining guests though they can afford as follows: "There is no good in a person who does not want to entertain guests." (Ibn Hanbal, IV, 155)
In a hadith, the prayer by a traveler (guest) is mentioned among the prayers that are certain to be accepted. (Abu Dawud, Witr, 29; Tirmidhi, Daawat, 47)
A Muslim should try to have the following characteristic mentioned in the following verse regarding all issues: "...They give their believing brothers preference over themselves, even though poverty was their (own lot)..." {(al-Hashr 59/9; Bukhari, Tafsir, (59), 6}
We understand from both the statements and practices of the Prophet (pbuh) that it is a very important ethical principle for a Muslim to entertain guests. The phrase "guest of God" shows the importance attached to guests and respect shown to them based on the sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh).
61-)
If I say I guess somebody has done something bad, that is, if I do not say it is certain, is it still regarded as backbiting or slander?
Husn az-zann: "Interpreting something about which there is no definite decree as being good."
Su’ az-zann: "Interpreting something about which there is no definite decree as being bad."
"O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion (zann) as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin..." (al-Hujurat, 49/12)
Zann means "to think, to guess". Husn az-zann means to regard something that can be interpreted as both good and bad as good. The opposite of it is su’ az-zann, which means "to see everything from a negative viewpoint and to interpret people’s deeds and attitudes as bad."
If something is certain, it is clear that guessing is not in question related to it. For instance, if a person defends unbelief clearly, guessing is not in question; it is decreed that he is an unbeliever. However, when a believer says something that necessitates unbelief, it is more appropriate in terms of caution to have husn az-zann and to think that he said it due to his ignorance not due to being an unbeliever, instead of accusing him of unbelief.
The most important reason that leads man to su’ az-zann is the badness of his own character or his lifestyle. A person who always deceives others suspects others’ words and seeks a trick or fraud behind every act.
Another point is that everybody may have some faults and bad traits. We should not think that others are bad by viewing them from the window of our own bad traits.
Some people think that others have bad traits though they do not regard them appropriate for themselves as a means of defense. Some people see in other people some traits that they have but that they do not accept and criticize them.
For instance, a person who is a gossiper accuses others of gossiping. This can be something normal but also an illness. It should be treated. Su’ az-zann also exists in this illness. (see Nursi, Mesnevî-i Nuriye, 66)
An important place to use husn az-zann is to avoid complaining and rebellion thinking that misfortunes and disasters that are beyond man’s will have an aspect of wisdom and mercy of qadar. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) teaches it with the following hadith: "He who believes in qadar becomes free of grief." (Bukhari, Fadlu Laylatil-Qadri: 2, 3; Muslim, Siyam: 207-219)
"Those who listen to the Word, and follow the best (meaning) in it: those are the ones whom Allah has guided, and those are the ones endued with understanding." (az-Zumar, 39/18) Besides, it is necessary to pay attention to the verse above and look at the good and nice aspects of everything. Thus, meaningless, unnecessary, harmful, troublesome, ugly and temporary things will not attract our attention and will not keep our hearts busy.
It should not be forgotten that husn az-zann is an important part of high ethics. The soul and Satan are enemies of this nice trait. Thus, we have to prefer husn az-zann and try very hard to avoid husn az-zann.
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If a person has an illegitimate relationship with a person from the opposite gender and marries him/her afterwards, will the degree of the haram deed be lessened? If a person repents after marrying, will his sins be forgiven?
Firstly, the approach "Allah will forgive anyway" while committing a sin is wrong. It will be deadly wrong to plan a sin with that approach. Allah knows what is in the hearts. It is necessary to act sincerely toward Him. However, a person who commits a sin by obeying his soul can expect to be forgiven by Allah if he is really regretful.
It is not enough for a person who has an illegitimate relationship with a person from the opposite gender to marry him/her for his sin to be forgiven. It is also necessary to repent, and to ask for forgiveness from the person if violation of rights is in question. A sin is committed once and it is recorded as a sin once. If that sin is not forgiven, it is recorded as a sin.
If a person repents, only Allah knows if his/her sin will be forgiven or not. Marrying a person after having an illegitimate relationship with him/her will not lessen the degree of the haram deed.
63-)
Is it haram for men to have short hair?
No, it is not haram for men to have short hair.
However, the information given in the details of the question is not about shortening the hair on the head, but about eliminating the disorder of belief in the head. (1)
Therefore, we consider it appropriate to answer the question of shortening the hair first and then explain the issue mentioned in the question:
Shortening or Shaving Hair
Our Prophet (pbuh) stated that appearance was important along with moral characteristics, and in this context, he encouraged clean and well-groomed hair. (2)
The Prophet (pbuh) himself
- applied the oils and fragrances used at that time to his hair, trying to keep his hair clean. (3)
- According to strong narrations, he did not dye his hair, which was not bleached enough to make him feel the need to dye it. (4)
It is stated that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) sometimes grew his hair over his ears and down to his shoulders, that he sometimes braided it (5), that he sometimes cut it short, and that he started to comb it beginning from the right part by parting it in the middle or the side; it is understood that trying to be different from the members of other religions was also effective in his preferences regarding the issue. (6)
The Prophet (pbuh) did not find itappropriate to cut some hair of the children and leave some of them in bangs, fearing that they would resemble Jews. (7)
On the other hand, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) did not tolerate excessive fondness for adornment and recommended us not to be too busy with combing hair. (8)
The Prophet (pbuh), who wanted women and men to maintain their differences peculiar to them, did not regarded it as objectionable for women to shorten their hair in line with social acceptance but he did not find it appropriate for them to shave their hair. (9)
In another hadith, it is stated that women who wear their hair in a bun “like a camel’s hump” in order to attract attention will be subjected to otherworldly punishment even though they seem to comply with hijab. (10)
In conclusion, it is permissible for men to cut or shave their hair. Although it is appropriate for women to shorten their hair, it is not appropriate for them to shave their hair.
Eliminating the Wrong Ideas in the Head
The issue is mentioned in the details of the question is about a man named Sabigh.
According to the narration, a man named Sabigh came to Madinah, made interpretations on mutashabih verses and started to confuse people. Umar (ra) summoned the man and questioned him. Seeing the bad intentions of Sabigh, Umar (ra) punished him. (11)
In fact, that person was a rebellious agitator raising ambiguous questions; he also caused mischief, cast doubt on the meaning of the Quran, and hence weakened its authority.
In short, Sabigh was arrogant and conceited and a phony. (12)
As the head of state, Umar’s responsibility to prevent mischief and turmoil in the society made it necessary for him to take a tough stance against those who wanted to underestimate and distort religious values, including the Quran. Umar’s precautionary attitudes when he sensed a diversion purpose or noticed a deed that might lead to misunderstanding will enable us to understand his attitude toward Sabigh better.
Sabigh realized his mistake and said, “O Leader of the Believers! I swear by Allah that all the previous disorders in my head have disappeared now.” He repented by admitting his mistake. (13)
64-)
How should the ethics of a Muslim man / woman be?
According to the information obtained from the Quran, every Muslim woman / man has the following characteristics – in summary:
- He believes in Allah and the Day of Judgment. He is careful about the seditions of the world and tricks of Satan. He worships his Lord, fulfills His order and avoids His prohibitions. He surrenders to Allah fully. He repents a lot and asks his Lord for forgiveness due to his mistakes, negligence and sins.
- He is aware of his responsibility toward his family members. He seeks Allah’s consent in everything that he does. He orders what is good as much as he can and forbids what is evil.
- He is aware of his duties toward himself. He is aware that man consists of mind, spirit and body and that each has a structure and needs peculiar to them. He is careful about the balance among them; he does not give one too much importance by ignoring the others. He regards the Book of Allah, the Sunnah of the Prophet and the lives of great personalities as a guide regarding the issue.
- He gives importance to his clothes without waste, extremism and conceit. He shows the care that fits man, whom Allah made honorable, ordered His angels to prostrate and put what is in the skies and earth under his service, in his inner world.
- He treats his parents well and does them favors. He appreciates them. He tries not to be a disobedient child.
- He becomes mature, loving and friendly toward his spouse; he tries to attain her consent; he tries to show respect to her, do her favors, keeps her secrets, helps her do favors act piously and do righteous deeds; he fills her with happiness and peace.
- She is a very compassionate mother toward her children. She is aware of her responsibility about their education. She makes her children feel her love, compassion and mercy toward them. When it is necessary, she warns her children and corrects their mistakes. Thus, she makes high ethics settle in their hearts; she tries to give them a good education by directing them to good and honorable works.
- He continues the bond of love between him and his relatives. He does his neighbors favors and helps them. He takes care of them. He knows the rights about neighbors and observes them.
His relationship with his brothers and friends are based on “loving for Allah”. It is the loftiest and cleanest love in human life. For, it is a love that is free from all kinds of material interests and doubts. A relationship based on this principle takes its cleanliness and purity from the light of the Quran and the Sunnah.
Therefore, a Muslim is honest, sincere and tolerant in his relationships with his brothers. He does not break off his relationship with them; he does not hurt their feelings by arguing and quarreling with them. He does them favors whenever he can. He always welcomes them by smiling. His social relationships are at a very high level. He takes his socialness from the principles of his religion and the decrees about high ethics of the fiqh of mutual relationships.
In addition, every Muslim, man-woman, has the following characteristics:
- He has high ethics. He tells the truth to everybody and is honest.
- He does not trick, deceive or betray people. He does not perjure.
- He gives advice. He leads people to good deeds. He keep his promise. He is modest and chaste.
- He does not interfere in the things that do not interest him. He does not search people’s private issues.
- He keeps away from show off. He acts justly in all cases. He does not oppress. He acts justly toward the people that he does not like. He does not become happy for the bad things that happen to anybody.
- He does not have negative thoughts about others. He does not backbite or commit talebearing. He does not swear and utter bad words. He does not mock anybody.
- He is lenient and merciful toward people. He helps those who are in need. He is generous. He does not run anybody’s nose in it. He makes things easy, not difficult.
- He does not act jealously. He avoids factitious words and deeds. He is good-humored. He does not act arrogantly; he is humble. He is not engaged in useless things.
- He visits ill people. He cares about the problems of others. He prefers others to himself. He appreciates the favors done to him and thanks people.
- She adapts her customs and traditions to Islamic criteria. She shows respect to the elderly and virtuous people. She does not try to resemble men.
- She calls to Allah. She calls people kindly and wisely. She stays together with righteous women.
- She is chaste and modest; she protects her awrah places. She protects not only her body, eyes and ears but also her mind, heart and intention from all kinds of haram deeds.
- She is patient and hopeful. She never abandons hope of Allah’s mercy.
- She is knowledgeable about religion and ilm. She learns what is useful and harmful for her and acts accordingly.
- She is solemn and respectful.
- She is natural; she appears as she is and she is as she appears.
He never falters and acts lazily in important and dangerous duties. He relies on Allah.
- He gives importance to bodily and spiritual cleanliness and acts accordingly.
- He is not a gambler, drunkard, trickster, fraud, cheater, sycophant and twister.
- He does not judge about something that he does not know.
- He never leaves the truth and justice anywhere even if it is against him.
- He never leaves justice related to his enemies; he does not obstruct justice due to his enmity toward them.
- He avoids extravagance and stinginess.
- He does not harm anybody with his hand or tongue.
- He helps others at times of both welfare and hardship.
- If he wants to commit a bad deed or wrong somebody, he remembers Allah at once, asks forgiveness from Him and repents.
- He accepts the truth no matter who tells it; he accepts and takes knowledge, skill, wisdom and truth wherever he finds them; he does not act bigotedly about them.
- He is not lazy. He works for the world as if he will never die and gets ready for the hereafter as if he will die tomorrow; he fulfills his duties about both of them fully.
- He regards the love of Allah and the Prophet superior to everything. Love and fear of Allah covers all of his body.
- He avoids doubtful things by all means.
- His biggest aim is to try to be a real Muslim, to practice and make others practice the virtues that Islam determines and suggests, and to serve as a model to everybody.
Those are some examples from the personality of a Muslim, whom Islam forms with guidance, whose heart Islam forms with wisdom and whose prudence Islam enlightens.
65-)
Will you mention the explanations of hadiths and verses about bad traits and attitudes?
Abu Bakra narrates:
"The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
‘Shall I inform you about the biggest of the big sins?’ He repeated it three times. We said, "Yes!" He said,
‘To join others in worship with Allah, to be undutiful to one's parents and to kill a person.’ The Prophet was reclining at that time; then, he sat down and said,
‘And I warn you against giving a false witness.’ He kept on repeating it so many times that we thought, ‘We wish he would stop.’"[Bukhari, Shahadat 10, Adab 6, Isti'dhan 35, Istitaba 1; Muslim, Iman 143, (87); Tirmidhi, Shahadat 3, (2302)]
Ubayd Ibn Umayr narrates from his father:
"Somebody asked the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) about major sins. He answered as follows:
"They are nine." Then, he listed them: "To assign partners to Allah, magic, to kill a man, to take usury, to consume the property of an orphan, to retreat on the day of the battle, to slander chaste women, disobedience to the Muslim parents, and to regard committing sins in the sacred house, your qiblah, in your life and after death." [Abu Dawud, Wasaya 10, (2875); Nasai, Tahrim 3, (7, 89)]
5194 - Ibn Mas'ud narrates:
"I said,
‘O Messenger of Allah! What is the biggest sin in the eye of Allah?’
‘To associate partners with Allah, who created you,’he said,
‘Then, what?’ I asked.
‘To kill your child fearing that he will eat your food,’ he said,
‘Then, what?’ I asked.
‘To commit adultery with the wife of your neighbor.’" [Bukhari, Tafsir, al-Baqara 3, al-Furqan 3, Adab 20, Muharibin 20, Diyat 1, Tawhid 40, 46; Muslim, Iman 141, (3181, 3182), Tafsir, al-Furqan; Nasai, Tahrim 4, (7, 89, 90); Abu Dawud, Talaq 50, (2310)]
5195 - Ibnu Amr Ibnil-As narrates:
"The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,
"It is one of the biggest sins that a man should curse his parents!" The people there asked:
"How does a man curse his parents?" He answered:
"The man abuses the father of another man and the latter abuses the father of the former and abuses his mother." [Bukhari, Adab 4; Muslim, Iman 146, (90); Tirmidhi, Birr 4, (1903); Abu Dawud, Adab 129, (5141)]
66-)
If lying is a sin, why did Nuaym (r.a.) lie?
We could not find the Nuaym b. Masud incident in hadith sources.
According to some researchers, the fact that this event takes place only in history and biography books and not in hadith sources raises doubts about its soundness. In the places where this event is described, only the phrase “war is khud’a”, that is, war is cheating, is mentioned in hadith sources. The chain of narrators of this incident is not certain in terms of hadith sources. (see Dr. al-Umari, as-Siratun-Nabawiyya, as-Sahiha, 2/430)
There are many history and biography books that describe this incident in detail. Perhaps the most important one is the Tabari’s Tarikh (History). (see Tarikhu Tabari, 2/550-579)
- Lying is permissible in three places according to hadith sources:
- Spouses lying to each other (to ensure family peace).
- Lying in order to defeat the enemy during the war.
- Lying in order to arbitrate between two people, communities or groups.
According to some scholars, it is not appropriate to lie directly in all of those three cases, but it is permissible to lie implicitly or indirectly. According to Imam Nawawi, it is permissible to lie directly in one of those three cases when it is necessary, but it is more preferable to lie implicitly or indirectly. (see Ibn Hajar, Fathul-Bari, 6/159)
Nuaym b. Masud’s trick may be implicit or indirect; it looks a bit like that. Or it is permissible because it is in one of those three cases.
As believers, our duty is not to question whether what Allah and His Messenger say is true because it leads a person to unbelief. What we need to do is to say, “The purpose of Allah and His Messenger is true no matter what it is” and surrender to them as long as we do not learn the wisdom behind the things that seem to be contradictory.
Note: The summary of the issue regarding Nuaym b. Masud is as follows:
Nuaym, who came near Madinah with the Ghatafan tribe to participate in the Battle of Khandaq, secretly met with the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) and said that he wanted to become a Muslim and that his tribe did not know about it yet. The Prophet (pbuh) asked him to keep it a secret and to spy on the enemy forces to set them against one another. He told Nuaym that the war consisted of cheating and that he could resort to false information when necessary. (see Ibn Hisham, Sirah, 3/240; Ibn Sad, Tabaqat, 4/278)
When a righteous believer evaluates people and incidents, he interprets them in a good way and thinks of good things. Hawing a good intention and good thoughts is an indication of the inner beauty and goodness of a person. The Prophet (pbuh) states the following:
"There are three things because of which hatred does not enter the heart of a Muslim: Sincerity in doing an action for the sake of Allah; having good thoughts about all Muslims and giving them advice; being in unity with Muslims in thought and deeds." (Ibn Majah, Muqaddima, 1 8)
It is among the essential duties of Muslims to wish goodness for people and to lead them to goodness. The Prophet (pbuh) received allegiance from people "on condition that they will have good intentions toward all Muslims..." to attract attention to this fact. (Bukhari, Iman, 42). However, what should not be forgotten here is the Prophet’s word "all Muslims". It is the duty of a Muslim to wish good things for all Muslims without any exception and to have good thoughts about them.
A Muslim must be mature and perfect in his deeds and attitudes toward unbelievers and polytheists in terms making their hearts feel warm toward Islam; his heart should not love them and their bad traits.
One of the attributes of righteous Muslims is not to have bad thoughts about people. The following is stated in the Quran:
"O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin." (al-Hujurat, 49/12)
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) stated the following about having bad thoughts (suspicions) about people and telling lies about them:
"Avoid suspicion because it is the worst lie." (Bukhari, Wasaya, 8, Nikah, 45, Muslim, Birr 28)
Thus, he described zann (suspicion/having bad thoughts about others) as the worst lie. A truthful Muslim will not utter words resembling lies.
A Muslims should decide about people based on appearance. He should keep away from suspicion, doubt, gossip, delusion and slander. Trying to find secret things about people, intervening others’ private affairs and talking badly about their honor are not among the ethical characteristics of a Muslim. A Muslim acts based on what he sees. He says what he has seen. He does not make a judgment based suspicion and his ideas. Umar b. Khattab stated as follows:
"People decreed based on revelation during the time of the Messenger of Allah (pbuh). Revelation has ended now. We will decree based on your deeds that we see. We will protect those who do good things and allow them to approach us. We are not interested in what they conceal. Allah will call them to account for what they conceal. We will not rely on those who do bad deeds and will not approve of them even if they say that their hearts are clean." (M. Y. Kandahlawi, Hayatus-Sahaba, translated by A. Meylani, IV, 253).
Therefore, a conscious and pious Muslim will never forget the following verse when he speaks and makes a judgement:
"And pursue not that of which thou hast no knowledge; for every act of hearing, or of seeing or of (feeling in) the heart will be enquired into (on the Day of Reckoning)." (al-Isra, 17/36)
A Muslim will not speak against others. For, he believes that every word he speaks is recorded by an angel:
"Behold, two (guardian angels) appointed to learn (his doings) learn (and noted them), one sitting on the right and one on the left. Not a word does he utter but there is a sentinel by him, ready (to note it)." (Qaf, 50/17, 18)
A Muslim who is conscious of those orders is afraid of the responsibility of every word he utters. Therefore, we see him uttering every word carefully. For, he knows that a word he utters can elevate him to the rank of the consent of Allah or lower him to the lowest layer of Hell. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) states the following regarding the issue:
"A slave of Allah may utter a word which pleases Allah without giving it much importance, and because of that Allah will raise him to degrees of reward: a slave of Allah may utter a word carelessly which displeases Allah without thinking of its gravity and because of that Allah will record a penalty for him up to the Day of Judgment." (Bukhari, Riqaq, 23; Muslim, Zuhd, 49, 50)
A pious Muslim who has a clean heart will not heed the illogical words of others and what he hears from the gossips, rumors and doubtful words; he will not report to others what he hears before checking its trueness. On the contrary, he knows that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) regards reporting whatever one hears to others without finding out that they are true as haram. He acts based on the following principle: "It is enough as a sin for a person to report to others whatever he hears."
(Şâmil İslam Ansiklopedisi)
68-)
Why should one enter the toilet with the left foot and say audhu… bismillahi…?
Answer 1:
By the word “toilet”, we should not necessarily understand the modern meaning of the word. Instead of the word “khala” referred to in hadiths in the sense of “going out”, we now call that place a toilet. In a hadith, Anas (ra) states the following:
“The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) used to take off his ring (with the inscription “Muhammadur-Rasulullah” on it) while going to the toilet (latrine).”(Naylul-Awtar, 1/73)
The latrine was sometimes covered with a sheet. When somebody went behind it, he was said to have gone to the toilet. Even in the desert, there was a difference in the place where the call of nature was answered. For example, in the hadith sources there are expressions such as “when he entered the latrine, when he left the latrine”. This in and out is used in relation to the place of the latrine. Maybe the hadith scholars used these expressions thinking of the indoor toilets they saw later on. Bukhari points to half narrations that say “he went to the latrine, he entered the latrine”(Bukhari, Wudu’, 9). Muslim also included the expressions, “He went to the latrine, he went to kanaf” (Hayd, 122). Again, the expression “He came out of the latrine” is mentioned (Hayd, 118).
The issue of entering the toilet with the left foot and exiting with the right foot is taken from the principle of the Prophet’s (pbuh) “using the right hand for honorable things and the left hand for vulgar things” and is considered as a good manner and a sunnah in fiqh sources (see Ghazali, Ihya, 1/136; W. Zuhayli, 1/203).
Answer 2:
On the Day of Judgment, Allah will give the books of His servants whom He has chosen as good to their right hand and the books of those whom He has given bad marks to their left hand. In the Quran, the good people who will go to Paradise are referred to as “Ashab al-yamin = owners of the right hand” and those who will go to hell are referred to as “Ashab ash-shimal = owners of the left hand”. This evaluation shows that the right hand/right side has a value in the sight of Allah.
It is due to such reasons that the Prophet (pbuh) preferred the right to the left and entered good places such as mosques with his right foot and entered places such as toilets with his left foot. The exits were the opposite. You can compare other known matters to it.
According to a narration of Hafsa (ra), one of the wives of the Prophet (pbuh), the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) used his right hand to eat, drink, make wudu and wear his clothes, give and take something; he used his left hand to do other things.(Musnad, 6/287; Abu Dawud, Taharah, 18)
Aisha (ra), one of the wives of the Prophet (pbuh) said,
“The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) used his right hand to clean himself, eat and drink. He used his left hand to clean his private parts and to do other disturbing things.” (Musnad, 6/156; Abu Dawud, Taharah, 18)
Suraqa b. Malik b. Ju’shum came from the mosque of the Prophet and said, “The Messenger of Allah taught us this and that.” Somebody who was there made fun of him and asked, “Does he also teach you how to go to toilet?” Thereupon, Suraqa b. Malik said, “Yes, I swear by Allah who sent him as the true prophet that he ordered us to lean to the left side on the toilet and to hold the right foot straight.” (Tabarani, al-Mu’jamul-Kabir, VII, 136; Majmauz-Zawaid, I, 206)
When the narrations are taken into consideration, it is understood that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) used his right hand to do certain deeds and his left hand to do other deeds. (see Musnad, 6/287; Abu Dawud, Libas, 44)
According to the narrations above and similar ones, it is mustahab to use the right hand (foot, etc.) to wear clothes, hats and khuffs, to enter the mosque, to use miswak, to apply kohl, to trim nails, to shorten the mustache, to comb hair, to shave under the arms, to cut hair, to salute at the end of the prayer, to wash the organs in wudu, to exit the toilet, to eat, to drink, to shake hands, to greet hajar al-aswad and to do similar deeds; it is mustahab to use the left hand (foot, etc.) to enter the toilet, to exit the mosque, to blow one’s nose, to clean one’s private parts, to take off clothes, hats and khuffs.
It is mustahab to say audhu… bismillahi… before entering the toilet, and, to say the following prayer (dua) if one knows it:
“Allahumma inni audhu bika minal khubthi wal khabaith.= O Allah! I seek protection in you from the male and female unclean spirits.” (Bukhari, Wudu’, 9, Daawat, 14; Muslim, Hayd, 122, 123)
Prayer to say after exiting the toilet:
“Ghufranaka, alhamdu lillahilladhi adhaba annil adha wa afani = O Allah! I seek your forgiveness. All praises are due to Allah who has taken away from me the discomfort and granted me comfort.”(Ibn Majah, Taharah, 10; Tirmidhi, Tibb, 32)
Answer 3:
We call all that our Prophet (pbuh) did, spoke, behaved and acted sunnah. So, we can call everything he did throughout his life sunnah.
The word sunnah used in fiqh books, on the other hand, means “if we do it, there is a reward and if we do not do it, there is no sin.”
For example, eating with the right hand, cleaning the teeth, not eating while standing. However, if we take the word sunnah in its broad sense, it includes everything that the Prophet (pbuh) did. In that case, Allah’s demands and prohibitions are also included in the sunnah. For example, did the Prophet (pbuh) perform prayers? Yes, he did. Then, performing prayers is also a sunnah. In that case, it will be necessary to divide the sunnah into sections.
Fard ones: Anything that Allah wants us to do or abandon. Our Prophet is the best example and the best practitioner of Allah’s commands and prohibitions. By following him, we follow him to the highest degree. Such as performing prayers, fasting, not committing fornication, not eating haram, etc.
Wajib ones: The wajibs of our religion. For example, it is wajib to perform three rak’ahs of the night prayer.
Nafilah ones: They are the things we do while performing deeds of worship other than fards and wajibs. For example, it is fard to read some chapters or verses of the Quran while performing a prayer but it is nafilah to read subhanaka supplication.
Adabs: They are also called good manners (etiquette). If we follow the Prophet (pbuh) in our daily activities such as eating, going to bed, going to and from the mosque, going to and from the toilet, etc., we will be doing them in accordance with their etiquette.
In other words, we can divide the Sunnah into fard, wajib, nafilah and adab. The highest and most virtuous sunnah is in this order. We can think of it like the body of a human being. A human being has organs necessary for life: The brain, the heart, the head and so on. In the principles we need to believe, the brain of our spirit is like the heart. Our body has sensory organs such as eyes, ears, hands and feet. Fards are like that. They are the eyes, ears, hands and feet of our spirit. A person who does not do fards is incomplete like a person without hands, feet, eyes and ears. Our body also has beauties and ornaments such as fingers, eyebrows and hair. We can live without them. However, when we have them, we become more perfect human beings.
Similarly, the nafilah and adab parts of the sunnah are the beauties and ornaments of our spirit. There is a lot of thawab if we do them and no sin if we do not do them.
To sum up, fard and wajib parts are sunnahs that must be done. As for nafilahs and adabs, there is a lot of thawab if we do them. As for harams, we need to protect our spirits from harams that kill and poison just as we protect our bodies from things that kill, such as AIDS, poison and fire.
69-)
What kind of a balance should be established between enjoying and abandoning worldly pleasures?
The religion of Islam is based on “as-Sirat al-Mustaqim”(the straight path), which is the moderate way, away from extremisms. Therefore, it is natural for people to benefit from the boons Allah created for them.
“Say: Who hath forbidden the beautiful (gifts) of Allah, which He hath produced for His servants, and the things, clean and pure, (which He hath provided) for sustenance? Say: They are, in the life of this world, for those who believe, (and) purely for them on the Day of Judgment. Thus do We explain the signs in detail for those who understand.” (al-A'raf, 7/32)
This fact is emphasized in the verse above.
There are criteria and good manners for everything; similarly, there are criteria and good manners for legitimate sustenance like eating and drinking. The clearest aspect of these criteria is not to waste.
“O Children of Adam! Wear your beautiful apparel at every time and place of prayer: eat and drink: But waste not by excess, for Allah loveth not the wasters.” (al-A'raf, 7/31)
Attention is attracted to this criterion in the verse above. It is understood from the verse that man can wear nice clothes and eat delicious food without wasting.
There are certainly different aspects in the details of this issue, whose general principles are indicated, which will lead to different decrees. For instance, it will disturb one’s conscience if he eats delicious food when his neighbor is hungry. It disturbs softhearted people to wear clothes that people around them cannot afford. It will harm one’s nature to try to live based on the desires of the soul in this age, when the wealth of people is doubtful.
There is a big difference between “to eat to live” and “to live to eat”. There is a big difference related to having strong and stimulative food between a young bachelor and a married man. It can be poison for one of them while it is antidote for the other.
The tradition of abandoning pleasures has existed among the pious people (people of taqwa) for a long time due to the issues mentioned above and similar ones. Some practices of diet have been made and some pleasures have been abandoned since the era of the Companions so as not to spoil the soul and not to be deceived by the suggestions of Satan.
What matters is to have a standard of living that will not disturb the balance of the world and the hereafter. This standard is not the same for everybody. There are different standards that change from person to person.
A person cannot demand others to follow the same standard that he prefers. He can perform fasting every other day but he cannot force his family members to do the same. He cannot expect them to abandon the pleasures that he has abandoned.
Some explanations of Badiuzzaman Said Nursi shed light on the issue. There are some conditions of pursuing pleasures and comfort in the world life:
The first condition:Pleasures and comfort must be within the bounds of licit (halal). To pursue pleasures and comfort through illicit (haram) ways lead man to Hell. Besides, "the bounds of the licit are sufficient for enjoyment; there is no need to enter the bounds of haram." Man is free within the bounds of licit.
The second condition: It is necessary to thank Allah forpleasures and comfort. That is, man can pursue any legitimate pleasures to thank Allah. Besides, Allah equipped man with numerous organs and faculties so that he would thank Allah. Then, it is possible to thank Allah by enjoying all kinds of halal pleasures and comfort. Only then can man know Allah through all of his feelings and organs and thank Him.
The third condition:It is necessary not to waste and go to extremes even if it is halal. For, this world is not for satisfaction but for tasting. We are allowed to taste but not allowed to swallow greedily. We can pursue pleasures and comfort unless we waste.
The fourth condition: It is necessary to take the state of the majority of the people into consideration. That is, if the majority of the community in which one lives is hungry and miserable, it does not fit a human being and a Muslim to pursue pleasures and comfort. However, if the general state of the community is good, one can pursue pleasures and comfort.
To sum up, man can pursue all kinds of pleasures and comfort of the world life in accordance with the conditions mentioned above. (see Lem'alar, On Dokuzuncu Lem'a, Üçüncü Nükte)
Thus, it changes from person to person, from time to time, from place to place, from intention to intention and based on the other conditions to pursue pleasures and comfort. The intentions of a person who pursues pleasures and comfort in order to satisfy his bodily desires and a person who wants to thank Allah by tasting the flavor of the boons He gives are to be evaluated differently along with the spiritual nature of the pleasures they pursue.
Finally, we can read the following statement of Badiuzzaman Said Nursi, expressing the criteria of waste:
“One consists of nutritious food like cheese and egg and costs forty para and the other is of the choicest pastries and costs ten kurush. Before entering the mouth, there is no difference in these two mouthfuls with respect to the body, they are equal. And after passing down the throat, they are still equal in nourishing the body. Indeed, forty paras’ worth of cheese is sometimes more nutritious. Only, in regard to pampering the sense of taste in the mouth, there is a half-minute difference. You can see from this what a meaningless and harmful waste it is to increase the cost from forty para to ten kurush for the sake of half a minute.” (see ibid, İkinci Nükte)
We think that it is quite a useful method to consider those explanations in the form of a composition under the light of the consciousness of belief, to arrange the criteria based on the state of the individuals, to determine the places of the standards without confusing rukhsah (permission) with azimah (strict rule), to have sound intentions, to act without forgetting that not all drugs are useful for everybody and that they have side effects, to have subjective evaluations without leaving the objective scope of haram and halal, and to apply a specific method of treatment.
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Did the prophet perform spiritual accounting?
- Spiritual accounting does not mean seeing the mistakes of one’s soul and thinking about one’s sins only. There are so many subtler degrees of taqwa along with them. It will be useful to note them in the notebook of the heart.
- We have not been able to find a clear expression stating that the Prophet (pbuh) performed spiritual accounting. However, his life shows that he performed spiritual accounting.
It will be useful to attract attention to the following points regarding the issue:
1. Hz. Aisha narrates: I asked the Messenger of Allah (pbuh): Are the people mentioned in the verse “And those who dispense their charity with their hearts full of fear, because they will return to their Lord” (al-Muminun, 23/60) ‘those who drink and steal’? The Prophet (pbuh) said, ‘O daughter of Siddiq! They are those who perform prayers, fast and give sadaqah. They fear that their good deeds will not be accepted. They are the people who compete one another to do good/charitable deeds.’ (see Tirmidhi, Tafsir, 23/3175; Ibn Majah, Zuhd, 20)
This hadith shows that spiritual accounting is not limited with sins and that it can be related to whether good deeds will be accepted or not; it also shows that the Prophet (pbuh) performed such spiritual accounting since he explained the verse like that.
2. Hz. Aisha narrates: The Prophet (pbuh) would worship until his blessed feet swelled at night. I asked, "O Messenger of Allah! Why do you get tired so much though Allah forgave your previous and future sins?" The Prophet said, "O Aisha!Shall I not be a slave who thanks Allah?" (Bukhari, Tahajjud, 6; Muslim, Kitabu Salatil-Musafirina wa Qasriha, 18) With that sentence, the Prophet stated that he performed prayers like that due to love of Allah and pleasure of worshipping, not due to fear of Allah.
3. The invocations and supplications of the Prophet (pbuh) in Jawshan al-Kabir, which is a prophetic invocation, and in his many other invocations and what he mentions in his invocations and supplications show that he performed spiritual accounting.
4. That the Prophet repented and asked for forgiveness a hundred times a day shows how seriously he performed spiritual accounting.
According to a narration, the Prophet (pbuh) said, “There is (at times) some sort of shade upon my heart, and I seek forgiveness from Allah a hundred times a day.” (see Muslim, Dhikr, 41; Abu Dawud, Witr, 26)
The above statement of the Prophet (pbuh) shows his distinguished place in worshipping and his meticulous understanding of responsibility.
- According to some scholars, the hadith above states that the Prophet (pbuh) sometimes forgot some dhikr, wird and meditation that he performed every day – as a human being – and hence he repented and asked for forgiveness.
According to some other scholars, the Prophet (pbuh) sometimes assumed such a state in the knowledge of Allah that he would be overwhelmed with dhikr and tawhid or his heart would be covered by solemnity, peace and tranquility; and he would repent and ask for forgiveness as gratitude due to this nice state, which he regarded as a great blessing.
According to some other scholars, the Prophet (pbuh) progressed on the steps of worshipping all the time. When he ascended one step up, he would repent and ask for forgiveness because of being on the previous step. (see Ibn Hajar, Fathul-Bari, 11/101-102)
They all show that the Prophet (pbuh) performed spiritual accounting more than everybody else since he feared Allah more than everybody else.
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Is it permissible for men to kiss each other on the cheek when they shake hands?
Islamic scholars divide kissing into five parts: "kiss of love, kiss of mercy, kiss of compassion, kiss of respect and kiss of lust". They say all of them will be regarded as worship if they take place for the sake of Allah and evaluate kissing children as "mercy", separating it from kissing with lust.
It is a necessity of Islamic fraternity for believing men and women to greet each other, to ask about their health, to shake hands, to hug each other and to smile to each other. All of those deeds are regarded as sadaqah and worship.
The Prophet (pbuh) states the virtue of shaking hands as follows:
"If two Muslims meet and shake hands, Allah Almighty will forgive their sins before they leave." (1)
We learn how the Prophet (pbuh) acted regarding the issue from Abu Dharr. Some Muslims asked him,
"When you met the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), would he shake hands with you?"
Thereupon, Abu Dharr narrated the following luminous reminiscence:
"There was never a time that any of us met with the Prophet and did not shake hands. He would greet us and shake hands with us every time we met. One day the Prophet sent for me, but I was not at home. When I reached home, they informed me that the Prophet had called; so, I immediately went to him. The Prophet was sitting on a cushion, and when I entered, the Prophet stood up and embraced me. For me, this was one of the most emotional moments of my life." (2)
It is both a verbal and actual sunnah of the Prophet to shake hands and to hug when you meet a person. There is no rule that this sunnah is only for men. Believing women also act in accordance with this sunnah. However, there is something to be careful about the issue: it is not permissible for women to shake hands with the men that are non-mahram.
As for the issue of uttering salawat when two people meet, let us read a hadith regarding the issue:
"When two people that love each other meet and utter salawat for the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), they will be forgiven by Allah before they leave." (3)
The following order, which we practice, is deduced from the hadiths above: When two Muslims meet, they greet each other by saying, "Assalamu Alaykum" "Wa alaykumussalam" first and shake hands. Then, they utter salawat for the Prophet (pbuh) by saying, "Allahumme salli ala sayyidina Muhammad". They are all sunnah. They are not bid’ah or fabricated. Both men and women try to practice this sunnah.
However, it is more appropriate for women not to practice the sunnah of shaking hands and hugging in a street, etc. where non-mahram men can see them. Besides, the believing women who act in accordance with taqwa are always careful about Islamic rules and good manners.
IS IT PERMISSIBLE FOR MEN TO KISS THE FACE OF EACH OTHER?
According to Abu Hanifa and Imam Muhammad, it is makruh for men to kiss the face of each other when they meet but it is not makruh according to Imam Abu Yusuf.
Some scholars state the following regarding the issue: It is permissible to kiss the face of a religious scholar and a person who has taqwa because to protect the honor of the religion is in question in this act.
It is makruh for women to kiss the cheeks of each other when they meet and leave. (4)
Footnotes:
1) Abu Dawud, Adab: 143
2) Musnad, 5:168.
3) al-Adhkar Translation. p. 480
4) al- Fatawal- Hindiyya, 5:369
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KARAM (KINDNESS)
Favor, generosity, honor, donation. One of the nice traits that a Muslim needs to have.
The word “ikram” meaning to show respect and to help is derived from the same root. It is used in the sense of welcoming a person, treating to him and entertaining him.
Karam is a comprehensive word meaning treating people nicely with words, deeds, financial help and treat (food and drink). Therefore, the word "karam" lexically includes a great part of Islamic ethics.
Forgiving, generosity, treating people well, grant and geniality are among the nice traits that this word expresses.
"Karam" is a lexically comprehensive word but it is used in the sense of generosity, being honorable and noble as a term. A "karim person" means a "generous, honorable, respectable person
The following is stated in a hadith: "He who believes in Allah and the Day of Judgment should treat to his guest. (Nawawi, Riyadus-Salihin, translated by H. H. Erdem, II, 119)
"Karim": good-natured, generous, honorable and respectable among people. Its opposite is "laim": ill-natured, vile, unrespectable among people.
"Karim" is one of Allah’s Beautiful Names (Asma al-Husna) (an-Naml, 27/40, al-Infitar, 82/6). It means the one who has grace and grant, who forgives a lot.
"Dhul-Jalal- wal-ikram" (ar-Rahman, 55/27, 78), which means the one who has majesty and grace, is one of Allah’s Beautiful Names.
The religion of Islam is based on the foundation of high ethics. The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), who is the prophet of Islam with high ethics was sent as a "model for believers":
" And thou (standest) on an exalted standard of character" (al-Qalam, 68/4).
"Ye have indeed in the Messenger of Allah a beautiful pattern (of conduct) for any one whose hope is in Allah and the Final Day, and who engages much in the Praise of Allah " (al-Ahzab, 33/21).
The Prophet (pbuh) said, "I was sent to complete high ethics only."
His best statement about "karam" is what he said to Qurayshis on the day when Makkah was conquered: After his speech on the day of conquest, the Prophet addressed them as follows: “O Qurayshis! What do you think I will do to you?” The Qurayshis said, “You are a generous and good brother. You are a generous and good nephew. We think you will do good deeds and favor to us.” Thereupon, the Prophet said, “My situation and your situation are like what Joseph (Yusuf) said to his brothers. I am saying to you what Yusuf said to his brothers: " This day let no reproach be (cast) on you: Allah will forgive you, and He is the Most Merciful of those who show mercy!" (Yusuf, 12/92). You can leave. You are free."
Hz. Ibrahim was a "friend of Allah" (Halilullah) (an-Nisa, 4/125) famous for his hospitality and a great prophet. It is said that he did not eat if there were no guests at his table. It is stated in the Quran that the Prophet Ibrahim was a generous person who liked treating to people: "Has the story reached thee, of the honored guests of Abraham? Behold, they entered his presence, and said: "Peace!" He said, "Peace!" (and thought, "These seem) unusual people." Then he turned quickly to his household, brought out a fatted calf, and placed it before them. He said, "Will ye not eat?" (adh-Dhariyat, 51 /24-27; Hud, 11/69)
The word "karam" is not mentioned in the Quran but words derived from it are used a lot: "karim" (in 27 verses), "ikram" (ar-Rahman, 55/27, 87); "kiram" (Abasa, 80/16; al-Furqan, 25/72; al-Infitar, 82/11); "akram" (al-Alaq, 96/3; al-Hujurat, 49/13); "Mukramun" (al-Anbiya, 21/26; as-Saaffat, 37/42, al-Maarij, 70/35; Yasin, 36/27; adh- Dhariyat).
The word "Karim", which is mentioned most in the Quran is used in the sense of "abundant", "great" and "honorable". "Rizqun karim": abundant, legitimate sustenance; "ajrun karim": great reward; "Quranun Karim": valuable, honorable Quran (al-Waqia 56/77).
There are a lot of orders and advice related to Karam-Ikram in the Quran: "Infaq fi sabilillah": Spending in the way of Allah is the most important order. "Feeding the indigent and the orphan" (al-Insan, 76/8), "liberality to kith and kin" (an-Nahl, 16/90), "Do good to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those in need, neighbors who are near, neighbors who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands possess" (an-Nisa, 4/36). The orders above and similar ones reflect Islam’s understanding of karam (generosity-helping). It is an important principle in Islamic ethics for a believer to want for his believing brother what he wants for himself and not to want for his believing brother what he does not want for himself.
When the Muslims left their houses and property in Makkah and migrated to Madinah, the Muslims in Madinah (Ansar) welcomed them and shared their houses and property with them. Thus, they became distinguished people who were praised in the Quran:
"But those who before them, had homes (in Medina) and had adopted the Faith,- show their affection to such as came to them for refuge, and entertain no desire in their hearts for things given to the (latter), but give them preference over themselves, even though poverty was their (own lot). And those saved from the covetousness of their own souls, - they are the ones that achieve prosperity." (al-Hashr, 69/9)
The Prophet (pbuh) established brotherhood between muhajirs and ansar after the Migration. One muhajir became the brother of one ansar. According to what is stated in a verse, Ansar loved their Makkan brothers more than their own selves. They treated to their muhajir brothers very much and made self-sacrifices for them. They even drew lots to accept muhajirs as their brothers. On the other hand, muhajirs appreciated the sincere efforts of Ansar and accepted their help to the extent that they needed; they did not misuse the sincere help of Ansar.
There are several hadiths about the superiority of generosity and evil of stinginess: "The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was the best, most generous and courageous one among people." "When something was wanted from him, he would never say no." He stated the following: "A generous person is close to Allah, close to Paradise, close to the people and far from Hell. A stingy person is far from Allah, far from Paradise, far from the people and close to Hell. An ignorant generous person is more beloved to Allah than a worshiping stingy person." (Tirmidhi, Birr, 40)
Priority in Treating and Good Deeds
Our religion listed the order of the people to be treated, respected and helped, and asked us to observe this order: "Serve Allah, and join not any partners with Him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those in need, neighbors who are near, neighbors who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (ye meet), and what your right hands possess: For Allah loveth not the arrogant, the vainglorious" (an-Nisa, 4/36)
We are ordered to say nice words to people, especially to our parents. (al-Isra, 17/23)
The Prophet and his clean wives are the best models for us in terms of treating people based on their state and entertaining and showing respect to them: Once, Hz. Aisha stopped over somewhere during an expedition. She placed something to eat on the ground. Meanwhile, a beggar came. Hz. Aisha said, "Give a loaf of bread to this poor person." Then, another person came on a mount. Hz. Aisha said, "Invite him to the meal." They said, "You give bread to the poor and invite the rich to the meal." Hz. Aisha said, "Undoubtedly, Allah determined some degrees for people. We are to act in accordance with those degrees. That poor man will be pleased with a loaf of bread. However, it does not fit us to give that rich man a loaf of bread like the one we gave to the poor one."
2. Once, the Prophet (pbuh) entered a house. His Companions followed him and filled the house. Then, Jarir b. Abdullah al-Bajali arrived. He could not find a place to sit and sat at the doorstep. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) took off his cardigan, gave it to him and said, "Sit on it." Jarir took it, wiped it over his face, kissed it and started to weep. Then, he folded it and returned it to the Prophet (pbuh) saying, "I will never sit on your garment. May Allah honor you as you honored me." The Prophet (pbuh) looked around and said, "When the leader of a tribe comes to you, treat to him and honor him."
3. "When the Prophet’s foster mother came, he placed his cardigan on the ground and said, 'Hello mother!' He made her sit on the cardigan and said, 'Ask whatever you want; your demand will be accepted.' She said, 'I want my tribe.' The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, "My right and the right of Sons of Hashim are yours." The other people there stood up and said, 'O Messenger of Allah! Let our right be hers too.' Afterwards, the Prophet (pbuh) visited his foster mother and gave her his two shares from Hunayn." (Ihya, 11/196).
To feed the poor and to help the needy are among the most important traits of believers. Hypocrites and deniers do not help the poor and they despise them." (al-Maun, 107/1-3)
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What does to rely on Allah and to have good thoughts about Him mean?
To rely on Allah means to rely on Allah’s mercy and wisdom.
To think that Allah will do things to destroy us means not to know Allah, who introduces Himself as Rahman (the All-Merciful) and Rahim (the All-Compassionate) at the beginning of every chapter of the Quran, as it is necessary. Allah is so merciful toward His slaves that He gives them numerous boons despite their ingratitude and denial; He does not cease to give them those boons.
Most of the problems that hit man originates from his own misuseand not obeying the divine rules, which are valid everywhere in the universe. Today’s modern medicine also states that most of the diseases originate from the mistakes of people.
It should not be forgotten that people are tested by Allah. There are pains and agonies along with pleasures due to the requirements of this test. Thanking for boons and showing patience in the face of problems is the most important criterion to pass this test.
When we rely on Allah, we should consider both this world and the hereafter. We should rely on Allah if there is a problem in this world, thinking that Allah will definitely give thawabs to us in return for it. The Prophet (pbuh) summarizes the issue as follows:
“There is good in every affair of a believer. If he is given a boon, he thanks Allah for it and receives a reward. If he encounters something bad, he shows patience and receives a reward.” (Musnad, 1/173)
It is understood that to rely on and trust in Allah means to trust His mercy and wisdom related to humans. For instance, diseases clean the sins of a person like soapy water. It is understood by any person with consciousness of belief that to show patience in the face of a temporary problem that makes a person gain the eternal life and to maintain the feelings in one’s heart is a very profitable deed.
It is one of the most important tests of a believer not to lose his trust in Allah even in the face of a very big misfortune.
“There are among men some who serve Allah, as it were, on the verge: if good befalls them, they are, therewith, well content; but if a trial comes to them, they turn on their faces: they lose both this world and the Hereafter: that is loss for all to see!.” (al-Hajj, 22/11)
One of the fine details of this test is indicated in the verse above.
“To rely on your father is not like that. We know that if you rely on your father, he will not harm youif it is within his power.” There is a truer statement than that one: A father cannot do anything unless Allah wishes. Therefore, to rely on Allah in the real sense is only a distraction.
The phrase “if it is within his power” is used in the question. What is in his power in real sense? So to speak, it is one of the biggest mistakes to rely on one’s father, who is too weak to fulfill the requirements of his compassion - as is relying on Allah - by not relying on Allah, who has more compassion than the compassion of thousands of fathers and who has power to do anything He wishes.
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Why does the Quran describe women as cultivable land?
That expression is a kindness, a compliment, and an appreciation for a special creature created by Allah as a delicate being.
Besides, it is also an example of the etiquette of speaking about women, especially in matters of private family life.
a) One of the most important characteristics of the Quran is that it avoids using expressions that produce the image of obscenity in people’s customs. For example, it has not mentioned any woman with her name except Maryam (Mary), the symbol of chastity. Similarly, the name of Yusuf (Joseph) is mentioned several times in the chapter of Yusuf but the name of Zulaykha is not mentioned at all.
b) The choice of this expression, which does not mention the details of the issue and throws the notion of obscenity to the farthest position from the mind, while explaining that it is not permissible to have intercourse with women through their anuses, should not be objected to; on the contrary, one should prostrate before the gentle and delicate style of the Quran.
c) The phrase of the verse, “Your wives are as a tilth unto you” is an example of eloquence that is comprehensive, descriptive and free from obscenity.
The word “tilth (cultivable land)” indicates that it is forbidden to have anal intercourse with women because the area where the seed of the child is sown is the side where the uterus is located.
Similarly, the phrase “approach your tilth when or how ye will” in the verse indicates that it is possible and legitimate to enter from all sides into the crop field where the seed of the child will flourish and blossom.
Moreover, it is an example of the eloquence peculiar to the Quran to remove this very scientific, very profound treatment that is close to obscenity from people’s minds, hearts, minds and imaginations so smoothly.
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They say one backbiting is equal to thirty-three fornications. Is it true?
One of the most frightening aspects of backbiting is the potential size of the disasters it can cause. Backbiting does not attack the ephemeral body but it attacks the heart and the spirit, which the Creator rendered eternal. It is rather difficult to commit a murder and it is possible and rather easy to find the doer and to punish him. However, it is very easy to commit backbiting; once it is uttered, it increases like mushroom; millions of copies of it has the potential to spread among people very fast and to cause unbelievable mischief and massacre.
It is almost impossible to determine the source of backbiting, to punish it, to stop it and even to prevent it from being transformed into slander. A murderer has an honor peculiar to itself but a backbiter has no honor at all.
A soldier who is martyred by the bullet of the enemy in the battlefront is indescribably lofty. However, backbiting can be transformed into a saddening murder like a father’s killing his own son or a child’s killing his own mother.
It is emphasized in the book called Sözler that the similes that seem to be exaggerated in some hadiths of the Prophet (pbuh) aim to show the potential size of the danger:
"The universality in this sort of hadith is in regard to possibility. For example, 'Backbiting is like murder.' This means someone who indulges in backbiting is more harmful than deadly poison, like a killer." (Sözler, Yirmi Dördüncü Söz, Üçüncü Dal)
This hadith, which is included in Musnadul-Firdaws 3:116, 117 is as follows in Kanzul-Ummal, 3:589 No: 8043: "Backbiting is more severe (worse) than fornication." Ghazali mentions the second form of the hadith. (see Ghazali, Kimya-yı Saadet, Merve Yayınları, p.386) However, Badiuzzaman says not every backbiting is worse than a murder or fornication but when its outcomes are taken into consideration, it can be a crime worse than them.
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Will you write the verses of the Quran and hadiths related to generosity?
Along with accepting generosity as a virtue and elevating it, the religion of Islam stops it from being a means of satisfying egoistic feelings and makes it acquire an ethical content consisting of the consent of Allah and love of humans.
The Quran insistently emphasizes that the acts of those who spend their property to show off, not for the sake of Allah, do not have any ethical values and that helping others must be based on the intention of doing favors to people (birr) and showing respect to Allah (taqwa). (see al-Baqara 2/264; al-Maida 5/2; al-Layl 92/1720)
In the Quran, generosity is primarily shown among the attributes of Allah. Allah has infinite grace and generosity (ar-Rahman 55/27, 76; al-Alaq 96/3).
One of the names of Allah is karim (generous). (al-Infitar 82/6)
In addition, the divine names like Rahman (merciful), Rahim (compassionate), wahhab (giver of all), latif (subtle), tawwab (acceptor to repentance), ghaffar (forgiving), afuww (pardoner), rauf (kind)andhadi (guide) are concepts that express generosity through various aspects.
The following is stated in a hadith: “Allah is generous and likes generosity.”“Jawad”, one of the names of Allah, is used for the word “generous” in the hadith. (Tirmidhi, “Adab”, 41)
There are many narrations about the generosity of the Prophet (pbuh) in hadith books. The Prophet (pbuh) is introduced as the most generous person among people in the hadiths reported from famous Companions. (see Bukhari, Badul-Wahy, 5, Sawm, 7, Manaqib, 23; Muslim, Fadail, 48, 50).
The Companions like Anas b. Malik, Jabir b. Abdullah and Hz. Aisha said that the Messenger of Allah did not reject anyone who mentioned him about his need. (see Musnad, VI, 130; Muslim, Fadail, 56, 57)
After this information, we will quote the translations of some verses and hadiths about generosity:
The translations of some verses about generosity:
- “And nothing do ye spend in the least (in His cause) but He replaces it.” (Saba, 39)
- “If any does good, the reward to him is better than his deed.” (al-Qasas, 84)
- “He that doeth good shall have ten times as much to his credit.” (al-Anam, 160)
- “The Evil one threatens you with poverty and bids you to conduct unseemly. Allah promiseth you His forgiveness and bounties. And Allah careth for all and He knoweth all things.” (al-Baqara, 268)
- “Whatever of good ye give benefits your own souls, and ye shall only do so seeking the "Face" of Allah. Whatever good ye give, shall be rendered back to you, and ye shall not Be dealt with unjustly.” (al-Baqara, 272)
- “And whatever of good ye give, be assured Allah knoweth it well.” (al-Baqara, 273)
- “Make not thy hand tied (like a niggard´s) to thy neck, nor stretch it forth to its utmost reach, so that thou become blameworthy and destitute.” (al-Isra, 29)
- “So he who gives (in charity) and fears (Allah).” (al-Layl, 5)
- “But those most devoted to Allah shall be removed far from it,- Those who spend their wealth for increase in self-purification.” (al-Layl, 17, 18)
The translations of some hadiths about generosity:
- “Do not wish to be like anyone except in two cases:
A person, whom Allah has given wealth and who spends it righteously.
The one whom Allah has given knowledge and wisdom and who acts according to them and teaches them to others.” (Bukhari, Ilm 15, Zakah 5, Ahkam 3; Muslim, Musafirin 268)
- The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) asked his Companions: “Who among you considers the wealth of his heirs dearer to him than his own wealth?”
The Companions said, “O Messenger of Allah! There is none among us but loves his own wealth more.”
The Prophet said, “A person’s wealth is whatever he spends during his life on good deeds while the wealth of his heirs is whatever he leaves after his death!” (Bukhari, Riqaq 12)
- “Protect yourself from Hell-fire even with half a date.” (Bukhari, Zakah 9, 10, Manaqib 25; Muslim, Zakah 66-68)
- “Two angels come down every morning.
One of them says, 'O Lord! Give to every person who does charity.'
The other says, 'O Lord! Destroy the property of every miser.” (Bukhari, Zakah 27; Muslim, Zakah 57)
- The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, “Allah Almighty said,
‘O Son of Adam! Give away for Allah so that you will be given.’” (Bukhari, Tafsiru Surah (11) 2; Nafaqat 1; Tawhid 35; Muslim, Zakah 36, 37)
- Somebody asked the Messenger of Allah (pbuh): “What deed of a Muslim is better?”
The Prophet said, “Giving food to the people you know and you do not know and greeting people.” (Bukhari, Iman 6, 20; Isti’dhan 9, 19; Muslim, Iman 63)
- “There are forty virtuous deeds and the best of them is the lending a female goat to a person so that he will milk it and benefit from it. If anyone does one of these virtuous deeds hoping for Allah's reward with firm confidence that he will get it, Allah will make him enter Paradise.” (Bukhari, Hiba 35)
- “O son of Adam! It is better for you if you spend your surplus (wealth), but if you withhold it, it is evil for you. There is (however) no reproach for you (if you withhold means necessary) for a living. And begin (charity) with your dependents; and the upper hand is better than the lower hand.” (Muslim, Zakah 97)
- Anas reported:
“It never happened that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was asked anything for the sake of Islam and he did not give that. Once, a person came and he gave him a large flock of sheep...” (Muslim, Fadail 57-58)
- Hz. Ummar narrates:
The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) distributed some goods. I said, “O Messenger of Allah! The others besides them were more deserving than these people, to whom you gave charity.
The Prophet said:
“They had in fact left no other alternative for me. They would either beg importunately from me or they would regard me as a miser, but I am not a miser” (Muslim, Zakah 127)
- Jubayr Ibn Mut’im narrates:
While we were in the company of the Messenger of Allah with the people returning from the Battle of Hunayn, Bedouin Arabs started to ask for their share of the booty insistently. Eventually, they made him stop under the tree called Samurah. His cloak was entangled by the tree. The Prophet stopped his camel and said,
“Give me my cloak. If I had as many camels as these trees you see, I would distribute them amongst you and you would not find me a miser or a liar or a coward.” (Bukhari, Jihad 24, Khumus 19)
- “Charity does not decrease the wealth. As a slave forgives others, Allah adds to his honor. If a person shows humility, Allah elevates him.” (Muslim, Birr 69)
- “There are three things for which I swear and narrate to you about; so, remember them.
The wealth of a slave shall not be decreased by charity.
No slave suffers injustice and is patient with it except that Allah adds to his honor.
No slave opens up a door to begging except that Allah opens a door for him to poverty.
And I shall narrate to you something else; so, remember it.
(First) A slave whom Allah provides with wealth and knowledge; so, he acts respectfully toward his Lord with it; he nurtures the ties of kinship with it, and he knows that Allah has a right in it. That is the most virtuous rank.
(Third) And a slave whom Allah provides with knowledge but does not provide with wealth. He has a truthful intention, saying: 'If I had wealth, I would do the deeds of so-and-so with it.' He has his intention; so, their rewards are the same.
(Third) A slave whom Allah provides with wealth but does not provide with knowledge. He spends his wealth rashly without knowledge, nor acting respectfully toward Allah, nor nurturing the ties of kinship; and he does not know that Allah has a right in it. That person is in the most despicable rank.
(Fourth) And a slave whom Allah does not provide with wealth or knowledge. He says: 'If I had wealth, I would do the deeds of so-and-so with it.' He has his intention; so, their sin is the same.” (Tirmidhi, Zuhd 17)
- According to what is reported from Hz. Aisha, the family of the Messenger of Allah slaughtered a sheep. The Prophet (pbuh) asked, “What has remained of it?”
Hz. Aisha said “Nothing has remained of it except its shoulder.”
Thereupon, the Prophet said, “So, all of it has remained except its shoulder” (Tirmidhi, Sifatul-Qiyama 35)
- “Do not shut your money bag; otherwise, Allah too will withhold His blessings from you” (Bukhari, Zakah 21)
- “Do charity; do not keep counting your money; otherwise,Allah will withhold His blessings from you. Do not hide your money in a pot; otherwise,Allah will withhold His blessings from you.” (Muslim, Zakah 88)
- “The example of a miser and the one who gives in charity is like the example of two men wearing iron cloaks so tightly that their arms are raised forcibly towards their collar-bones. So, whenever a charitable person gives in charity, his cloak spreads over his body so much so that it wipes out his traces. However, whenever the miser wants to give in charity, the rings of the iron cloak come closer to each other and press over his body, and his hands gets connected to his collarbones.The miser then tries to widen it but in vain.” (Bukhari, Jihad 89; Zakah 28, Talaq 24; Libas 9; Muslim, Zakah 76-77)
- “If one gives in charity what equals one date-fruit from the honestly earned money - and Allah accepts only the honestly earned money - , Allah takes it in His right (hand) and then enlarges its reward for that person who has given it, as anyone of you brings up his baby horse, so much so that it becomes as big as a mountain.” (Bukhari, Zakah 8; Tawhid 23; Muslim, Zakah 63, 64)
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Is it a sin to make love with one’s girlfriend or kiss her? Can you tell me in detail if making love is regarded as fornication and how I can get rid of it? What is the wedding night like according to Islam?
Making love with your girlfriend or fiancée or kissing her without a marriage contract is a big sin. If the phrase “making love” is used in the sense of fornication, one of the biggest sins is committed. However, if the phrase “making love” is used in the sense of making love without sexual intercourse, it is not fornication, but it is still haram even if it is not fornication because it is forbidden by Allah.
It is haram to touch or shake hands with a non-mahram woman.
The women who paid allegiance to the Prophet (pbuh) said:
“O Messenger of Allah! You did not hold our hands when we paid allegiance.” The Prophet (pbuh) said, “I do not shake hands with women.” (1)
Aisha (ra) states the following about allegiance:
“I swear by Allah that the Messenger of Allah’s hand did not touch a woman’s hand. He took their allegiance only with words.” (2).
The Prophet (pbuh) states the following in a hadith:
“It is better for one of you to be poked in the head with a needle than to touch a woman who is non-mahram for him.”
Islam does not degrade women by prohibiting shaking hands with them; on the contrary, it saves their honor. It prevents people with bad intentions from touching them with lust.
References:
1. Ahmad bin Hanbal, Nasai, Ibn Majah
2. Muslim; Halil GÜNENÇ, Günümüz Meselelerine Fetvalar II. 170.
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Did Abu Bakr (ra) forgive someone who punched him?
Abu Bakr (r.a), the Companion of the Prophet (pbuh) and his faithful caliph, was verbally and physically abused and persecuted many times by the polytheists during the Makkan period.
However, unfortunately, we have not been able to find in our hadith and siyar sources a narration stating that he was beaten by a person as mentioned in the question and then he forgave that person.
However, the Prophet’s (pbuh) statement, “That was the best response to be given to him!” was uttered due to a similar incident:
The following was reported from Said b. Musayyab: “
“While the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) was sitting with some of his Companions including Abu Bakr (ra), a man reviled Abu Bakr and insulted him. However, Abu Bakr remained silent.
He insulted him for the second time, but Abu Bakr kept silent again.
When he insulted him for the third time, Abu Bakr did not keep silent; he responded to him in the same way. Then, the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) got up and left that assembly.
When Abu Bakr (ra) saw that the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) suddenly stood up, he thought he got angry because of the bad words he said to the man. He asked, “O Messenger of Allah! Did you get angry with me because I responded to him?” The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) replied:
“When he cursed and insulted you, an angel descended from heaven and was rejecting what he had said to you. However, when you answered his bad words with bad words, a devil came to this assembly. I did not want to be in the same place as the devil; so, I stood up and left.” [1]
Did Abu Bakr (r.a) make a mistake by answering him in the same way?
That action of Abu Bakr (r.a) is not a bad act, but a way of giving what is deserved to those who deserve it, and talking to those who do not understand good words and behavior in the language they understand. Therefore, Abu Bakr used the permission and responded to his oppressor in kind, and did not applaud oppression by responding to him in excess. In the face of the bad deed, he did not respond to evil with evil; he was patient in time of hardship; he struggled against his soul (nafs) and did not play the devil’s game. He kept silent twice in the face of the oppression, and the third time he naturally stood up for his rights. [2]
Responding to evil is permissible based on the following verses of Allah in the Quran:
“The recompense for an injury is an injury equal thereto (in degree): but if a person forgives and makes reconciliation, his reward is due from Allah. For (Allah) loveth not those who do wrong.” [4]
“And if ye do catch them out, catch them out no worse than they catch you out: But if ye show patience, that is indeed the best (course) for those who are patient.” [6]
Why did the Prophet (pbuh) get angry and stand up?
The Prophet’s (pbuh) standing up and leaving the assembly can be considered in two ways:
1. The Prophet (pbuh) prefers what is the most appropriate in terms of decency and the best in terms of virtue. Although Abu Bakr (ra) was patient in the face of the bad deed he was subjected to and then sought his right, the Prophet (pbuh) did not regard it as the best response. [7]
It is as if the Prophet (pbuh) asked heartily Abu Bakr (ra), his friend and confidant, to be patient, straightforward and forgiving. [8]
2. He left that assembly because the devil was present there. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) never entered a place where the devil was present.
Dipnotlar:
[1] See Abu Dawud, Hadith No: 4896-4897; Bayhaqi, Shuabul-Iman, H. No: 6669.
[2] See Hasan b. Ali b. Raslan, Sharhu Sunani Abi Dawud, Darul-falah lil-bahsil-ilmi wa tahqiqit-turath, Egypt 1437, 18/638-639; Abut-Tayyib Muhammad Shamsul-Haqq b. Amir Ali ad-Diyanuwi al-Azimabadi, Awnul-mabud wa Hashiyatu Ibnul-Qayyim, Darul-Kutubil-Ilmiyya, Beirut 1415, 13/163-164.
[3] ash-Shura, 42/39.
[4] ash-Shura, 42/40.
[5] ash-Shura, 42/41.
[6] an-Nahl, 16/126.
[7] See Ali al-Qari, al-Mirqatul-Mafatih, Darul-Fikr, Beirut 1422, 8/3185-3187.
[8] See Abu Ibrahim Izzuddin Muhammad b. al-Imam al-Mutawakkil-Alallah Ismail as-Sanani, at-Tahbir li Idah Maaniyit-Taysir, Maktabatur-Rushd, Riyad 1433, 3/176.
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Does the statement "Courtesy (adab) comes before deeds" exist in the religious resources; is it significant?
- We have not been able to find such a statement in the religious resources that we have examined.
- However, the concept adab (courtesy, good manners) is very important in Islam. It is good manners for a person to act in accordance with the requirements of his belief. It is good manners to avoid disobedience to Allah. It is good manners to act in accordance with Allah’s orders and prohibitions.
In addition, deeds of worship like prayer and fasting have adabs along with fards, wajibs and sunnah.
The most well-known meaning of adab is being modest and solemn.
“The first thing human beings learn from prophets is this: ‘If you do not feel ashamed, do whatever you wish.’” (Majmauz-Zawaid, 8/27)
It is possible to understand how important adab is from the hadith above.
It should not be forgotten that each one of the universal ethical values introduced by Islam is an adab. The following statement by Badiuzzaman Said Nursi sheds light on the issue:
“The Practices (Sunnah) of the Prophet (pbuh) are courtesy. There is no matter among them beneath which a light, and courtesy, is not found! Allah’s Noble Messenger (Upon whom be blessings and peace) said: اَدَّبَنِىرَبِّىفَاَحْسَنَتَاْدِيبِى That is, 'My Sustainer taught me good conduct, and how well he taught me.' Yes, anyone who studies his biography and is acquainted with his practices will certainly understand that Almighty Allah brought together in His Beloved every sort of courtesy and good conduct. So if anyone gives up his practices, he abandons courtesy. He exemplifies the rule, بِىاَدَبْمَحْرُومْبَاشَدْاَزْلُطْفِرَب(The ill-mannered person is deprived of divine favor) and is discourteous in a way that causes him loss.”(Lem'alar, On Birinci Lem'a, Yedinci Nükte).
Generosity is a superior rule of ethics that enables man to give away to the needy, grant and help them legitimately from what he has for the sake of Allah, without having any other intentions.
Generosity is a faculty of the spirit. It leads man to giving away to the poor and granting. A person who has this faculty helps anything that is necessary individually and socially. He wants to help financially from his heart without being forced by anybody. Since such people act upon the following principle: "Allah is He Who gives all sustenance" (an-Naml, 27/64; adh-Dhariyat, 51/58), they have clean and rich hearts. (al-Layl, 92/17-20). They try to help others by all means. They believe that Allah gives them from His grace and generosity and that the needy have their share in what Allah gives them. (Hud, 11/6) They regard generosity as the basis of others’ rights. They try to meet the needs of others without thinking about their own needs. They even prefer giving what is necessary for them to others.
In order to attain the attribute of generosity, it is necessary to give away voluntarily (al-Hashr, 59/5; al-Hadid, 57/11-18; al-Maida, 5/13), not to expect any praise or reward for it (al-Insan, 76/8-l0), to avoid the deeds that will offend the person one helps (al-Baqara, 2/263-264), and to give from the things that are valuable for the giver (Aal-i Imran, 3/92).
Islamic scholars rate generosity as follows under the conditions that are listed:
Sakhawah: The generosity performed by giving away some of one’s property. That is regarded as the minimum degree of generosity like giving zakah.
Jud: The generosity performed by giving away most of one’s property and leaving some of it to oneself like Hz. Abu Bakr’s giving away for jihad in general.
Ithar: The generosity performed by giving away what one needs to others by undergoing difficulties himself. The example of it in the Era of Bliss is Madinah Muslims’ (Ansar) inviting Makkan Muhajirs to their city and sharing everything they had with the Muhajirs, which made Allah appreciate them. (see al-Hashr, 59/5) Another example is Hz. Abu Bakr’s risking his life in the cave for the Prophet (pbuh), whom he loved very much, during the Migration. (at-Tawba, 9/40)
Generosity and jihad are regarded equal in the Quran; Allah wants people to spend out of the bounties He gives them to other slaves. (al-Baqara, 2/254) He states that generosity will help to save man from all kinds of problems, pains and distress on the Day of Judgment. (al-Baqara, 2/222). In some verses, generosity is likened to business and as a loan to Allah. (al-Baqara, 2/245; al-Maida, 5/12; al-Hadid, 57/11)
Hearts are purified thanks to generosity. (al-Layl, 92/17-20). For, one of the factors that blacken the heart after unbelief and hypocrisy is excessive love of property and the desire of devotion to wealth. As a matter of fact, the following is stated in the Quran: "And ye love wealth with inordinate love." (al-Fajr, 89/20) With this love, man fears and thinks as follows: "If I spend this wealth, nothing will remain for me." Thereupon, Satan takes action: "The Evil one threatens you with poverty and bids you to conduct unseemly." (al-Baqara, 2/268) However, as Allah Almighty states,
"Property and wealth are only a trial." (az-Zumar, 39/49-52) The way of passing this trial (test) is generosity. (at-Taghabun, 64/15-17).
One of the most important reasons why man avoids generosity is the feeling "Why should I give my property to others?" and the thought "If I give to others from my property, my wealth will decrease and I will have difficulty when I am in need." The religion of Islam eliminates this feeling and thought by all means. According to Islam, property and wealth do not belong to any person. Property and wealth belong to Allah only. He is the real owner of everything. (Aal-i Imran, 3/180; al-Hadid, 57/10) This fact is emphasized in more than twenty verses in the Quran. Since property belongs to Allah, it is naturally regarded by the believer as the most appropriate to spend it in the way of its owner. The feeling of generosity in the believer originates from this thought. The Prophet (pbuh) states the following:
"A generous person is close to Allah, close to Paradise, close to the people and far from Hell. A stingy person is far from Allah, far from Paradise, far from the people and close to Hell. An ignorant generous person is more beloved to Allah than a worshiping stingy person." (Tirmidhi, Birr, 40) "One of the people to be envied is the generous." (Bukhari, Tamanna, 5; Tawhid, 45). The Prophet advises people to be generous when they live and not to delay generosity to after death: "The best charity is the one that you yourself give. Charity is what you give to anyone you wish and as much as you wish when you are healthy and when you own your wealth. You will be late if you delay it till the time when you are on the death bed. Your inheritors will do whatever they wish with it." (Bukhari, Wasaya, 14)
Abdullah b. Abbas narrates the generosity of the Prophet as follows: "The Messenger of Allah was the most generous and charitable one among people. When he was with Jibril in Ramadan, he would give away everything he had." Jibril would go to the Messenger of Allah every night in Ramadan and teach him the Quran. Jibril said, "The Messenger of Allah is more generous than the winds that bring abundance." (Muslim, Fadail, 12, 2308).
Jabir b. Abdullah stated the following:
"When somebody wanted something from the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), he would never say "No"." (Y. Kandahlawi, Hayatus-Sahaba, III, 1181)
The following was reported from Hz. Ali: "When something was asked from the Messenger of Allah, he would say "yes" if he wanted to do it. When he did not want to do it, he would keep silent. He never said "no"." (Y. Kandahlawi, ibid)
"We underwent such times that nobody among us wanted to have more gold and silver than his Muslim brother." This statement of Abdullah b. Umar shows us how the Companions acted related to generosity and altruism. In that case, a Muslim must spend the property Allah has given him in the way of Allah and in a way that will please Him when he is alive and healthy so as not to regret afterwards. God Almighty states the following: Spend something (in charity) out of the substance which We have bestowed on you, before Death should come to any of you and he should say, "O my Lord! why didst Thou not give me respite for a little while? I should then have given (largely) in charity, and I should have been one of the doers of good." (al-Munafiqun, 63/10)
Ghazzali says, "A person who does not have wealth must have contentment, not ambition. He who has wealth must have generosity, not stinginess."
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What does to rely on Allah and to have good thoughts about Him mean?
To rely on Allah means to rely on Allah’s mercy and wisdom.
To think that Allah will do things to destroy us means not to know Allah, who introduces Himself as Rahman (the All-Merciful) and Rahim (the All-Compassionate) at the beginning of every chapter of the Quran, as it is necessary. Allah is so merciful toward His slaves that He gives them numerous boons despite their ingratitude and denial; He does not cease to give them those boons.
Most of the problems that hit man originates from his own misuseand not obeying the divine rules, which are valid everywhere in the universe. Today’s modern medicine also states that most of the diseases originate from the mistakes of people.
It should not be forgotten that people are tested by Allah. There are pains and agonies along with pleasures due to the requirements of this test. Thanking for boons and showing patience in the face of problems is the most important criterion to pass this test.
When we rely on Allah, we should consider both this world and the hereafter. We should rely on Allah if there is a problem in this world, thinking that Allah will definitely give thawabs to us in return for it. The Prophet (pbuh) summarizes the issue as follows:
“There is good in every affair of a believer. If he is given a boon, he thanks Allah for it and receives a reward. If he encounters something bad, he shows patience and receives a reward.” (Musnad, 1/173)
It is understood that to rely on and trust in Allah means to trust His mercy and wisdom related to humans. For instance, diseases clean the sins of a person like soapy water. It is understood by any person with consciousness of belief that to show patience in the face of a temporary problem that makes a person gain the eternal life and to maintain the feelings in one’s heart is a very profitable deed.
It is one of the most important tests of a believer not to lose his trust in Allah even in the face of a very big misfortune.
“There are among men some who serve Allah, as it were, on the verge: if good befalls them, they are, therewith, well content; but if a trial comes to them, they turn on their faces: they lose both this world and the Hereafter: that is loss for all to see!.” (al-Hajj, 22/11)
One of the fine details of this test is indicated in the verse above.
“To rely on your father is not like that. We know that if you rely on your father, he will not harm youif it is within his power.” There is a truer statement than that one: A father cannot do anything unless Allah wishes. Therefore, to rely on Allah in the real sense is only a distraction.
The phrase “if it is within his power” is used in the question. What is in his power in real sense? So to speak, it is one of the biggest mistakes to rely on one’s father, who is too weak to fulfill the requirements of his compassion - as is relying on Allah - by not relying on Allah, who has more compassion than the compassion of thousands of fathers and who has power to do anything He wishes.
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THE ROUTE OF ETHICS DETERMINES THE ROUTE OF LIFE
“…Allah does not change a people´s lot unless they change what is in their hearts…” (ar-Ra'd: 13/11)
The relationship between ethics and life is pointed out in the verse above.
It is possible to deal with the lesson given by the verse in two aspects:
Firstly: Examining the relationship between the maintenance of high ethics in the communities with the maintenance of the boons granted to communities:
For instance, it is possible to understand the following from the verse: "Unless a community changes its high ethics and virtues, and plunges in sins, Allah will not change the boons it has."
On the other hand, if a community perverts, commits evils, plunges in bad and evil things and disobeys Allah, Allah will remove the boons and things He has granted them and destroys them.
Secondly: Examining the parallelism between the time period of the immorality in the community and the time period of the troubled state:
We can understand the meaning of the verse in this aspect as follows: "Unless a community gets rid of the immorality it has, it is not possible for that community to get rid of material and spiritual troubles."
It means high ethics is a means of a nice life and low ethics is a means of a bad life. This is one of the social laws of Allah called sunnatullah.
Definition of Ethics: According to Imam Ghazali, "Ethics is all of the deeds and attitudes that settle in human soul and a faculty that appears easily thanks to them without any mental force and without thinking.”
The definition of ethics by Abdullah b. Mubarak is as follows: “High ethics is having a smiling face, being generous in charitable deeds and not harming anyone.”
Hasan Basri describes it as follows: “High ethics means to da favors a lot, to keep away from bad deeds and to have a smiling face.” The Prophet (pbuh) states the following in a hadith: “Having a smiling face is sadaqah.” In Arabic literature, a smile/smiling face is described as “a universal language that does not need translation”.
According to ethicists, man is a being that has changeable and unchangeable aspects.
The encouragement by divine books, philosophers and pedagogues about high ethics is related to the changeable aspect of man. It is possible to understand from the hadith “I have been sent to complete high ethics” the importance of ethics as well as the changeability of it. Man is held responsible since he has a free will and he can prefer the good to the bad or vice versa. Man’s responsibility is confined to the deeds that he can prefer. He is not held responsible for the things that he cannot prefer and decide. The purpose of the education and training of man is to change his state, to proceed from bad to good, to improve by learning and to become an honorable member of the family of humanity. The actual source of universal Islamic ethics is the Quran and the Sunnah, which forms in the light of the Quran. Therefore, it will be useful to quote some verses that teach high ethics:
"Those who spend (freely), whether in prosperity, or in adversity; who restrain anger, and pardon (all) men;- for Allah loves those who do good."(Aal-i Imran 3/134)
"Ye have indeed in the Messenger of Allah a beautiful pattern (of conduct) for any one whose hope is in Allah and the Final Day, and who engages much in the Praise of Allah." (al-Ahzab 33/21)
"It is part of the Mercy of Allah that thou dost deal gently with them Wert thou severe or harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about thee: so pass over (Their faults), and ask for (Allah´s) forgiveness for them; and consult them in affairs (of moment). Then, when thou hast Taken a decision put thy trust in Allah. For Allah loves those who put their trust (in Him)." (Aal-i Imran 3/159)
"And those who, having done something to be ashamed of, or wronged their own souls, earnestly bring Allah to mind, and ask for forgiveness for their sins,- and who can forgive sins except Allah?- and are never obstinate in persisting knowingly in (the wrong) they have done." (Aal-i Imran 3/135)
"Nor can goodness and Evil be equal. Repel (Evil) with what is better: Then will he between whom and thee was hatred become as it were thy friend and intimate!" (Fussilat 41/34)
"Hold to forgiveness; command what is right; But turn away from the ignorant." (al-A'raf 7/199)
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Is it permissible for a woman to work in another family by staying there all the time?
There is no religious objection for a woman or man to work in another family by acting in accordance with the principles of privacy and hijab.
However, in case of staying there at night,
- the trustworthiness of the people who will stay in the same house together, - the security of the place to stay, - and the place’s not consisting of non-mahram people only are important.
Moreover,
- she must be given an outhouse or a secure room to stay, - there must be other women in the house if there are non-mahram men, - the conditions to prevent gossip must be arranged.
84-)
Is it necessary to give away more than what one needs?
It is good for us to give more than what we need in charity; it gains us thawabs; and it serves as a shield for us against many troubles and misfortunes. However, it is not obligatory or wajib for us to give away our extra wealth, whose zakah has been given; it is sunnah. Therefore, a person who does not give more than what he needs in charity will not be sinful.
The hadith in question is as follows:
“O son of Adam! It is good for you to give in charity what is more than you need. If you do not give it and keep it, it is bad for you. You will not be held responsible in the sight of Allah for having enough wealth. Start spending from your dependents.” (Tirmidhi, Zakah 32)
We know that human nature is very fond of wealth, property and worldly goods.
One of the most important acts of charity in Islam is infaq, i.e., spending excess wealth in the way of Allah. This charity is both more difficult and more beneficial than some of the daily deeds of worship that a person is obliged to perform because it has an aspect that transcends the individual and involves the whole humanity.
In fact, although all deeds of worship have a dimension that transcends the individual, zakah (alms) and sadaqah (charity) are very different in terms of ensuring social balance.
It is not permissible in our religion to accumulate and store wealth, to hoard gold, silver and money. It is absolutely necessary to make them available for the benefit of society. This benefit should not only be by giving, but also by making halal investments and opening up job opportunities. Opening up job opportunities is even more important as it gives people the opportunity to work. As it is clearly stated in the hadith in question, keeping property and wealth idle is a sin.
Our religion does not regard it as objectionable to have enough property and worldly wealth to meet the needs of oneself and one’s family and not to be in need of others.
It is not forbidden, on the contrary, it is encouraged, and there is no limit to wealth as long as one fulfills his religious obligations.
The most striking examples of it are the famous rich people among the Companions and the generations that followed them. Their lives are good examples for us. Our sources tell us through various examples how each of them was of great benefit to Islam and how they came to the aid of Muslims in times of need.
One should start helping and giving away to those for whom he has to provide sustenance, i.e., his family members. If everyone abides by this principle, there will be an all-encompassing solidarity among people. Thus, cooperation and brotherhood will spread in society and a peaceful society will be established.
Accordingly:
- Giving more of one’s wealth and possessions than one needs in charity is one of the greatest good deeds
- It is haram and sinful to keep property and wealth and not give their zakah and to be stingy.
- It is permissible for a person to save and keep enough money to meet his needs and the needs of his dependents.
- It is permissible to start spending on and giving to one’s family and dependents first. This is because it is fard for a person to provide sustenance for them. It is sometimes fard al-kifaya to take care of other poor people in need, and it is generally sunnah. (see Riyadus-Salihin - Imam Nawawi Translation and Explanation)
85-)
How Should We Give Religious and Moral Education to Children?
Perhaps the first thing to say about RELIGIOUS EDUCATION is that this concept is used in different meanings by different circles. Some understand religious education as only the education provided in schools or Quran schools. Thinking this way, they can suggest that religious education should be given to a child after the age of fifteen. However, ideal religious education has a much broader framework than this definition.
In Islam, religious education, from one perspective, begins from the moment a child is born; from another perspective, it starts even earlier, with the choice of a spouse. Religious scholars, who initiate this education with the choice of a spouse, justifiably argue that if a suitable partner is not chosen, the stones in the home, which is the child's first and fundamental school, will never fall into place properly.
According to our religion, education is not something confined only within the walls of schools, only to homes, or to a certain age; it rather has a "lifelong and everywhere" nature.
From this viewpoint, everything given to a child from the moment of birth falls within the scope of education. Breastfeeding, changing diapers, being cuddled, and being loved are all parts of this education. The answer our religion would give to a question about what counts as education would be: "Everything that affects a child's emotions, thoughts, physical development, closeness to Allah, and whether they will grow up to be a mature believer." Therefore, before teachers at school, parents at home must realize that they are the most important "educators" for their child.
Current knowledge in developmental psychology also is in line with this view. Experts emphasize that the education of a child between the ages of 0-7 must never be neglected. Particularly, the notion that "a small child understands nothing" is a very incorrect inference. The child, whom we think understands nothing, fills their memory with words and conversations of their parents until they are one year old. Then, as they approach the completion of their first year, they attempt to use the words they have stored in their memory. They succeed in this with words that are easy to pronounce.
During this period, the fact that a child begins to talk and their attempts to crawl and walk also indicate that they are always engaged in a "learning activity".
Moreover, according to some psychologists, the character of a child, which will last throughout their life, is formed in the first four years, according to others, in the first seven years. This is a significant observation. Therefore, what psychologists describe as "moral development" must be correctly imparted to the child in terms of beliefs and moral principles because these rules also foster the development of an internal control power known as conscience. The development of internal control power means the ability of a child to govern themselves. The external control power formed by family and environmental factors reduces its influence parallel to the development of internal control.
After a child begins to understand speech in their early years, the first thing to teach them for a healthy development of religious feelings and thoughts should be the phrase "La ilaha illallah" as commanded by our beloved Prophet (pbuh). Starting life with this mysterious and awe-inspiring truth that expresses the existence and unity of Allah means that the child, at a very young age, has passed the most serious initial phase of preparation for the purpose of creation. Families must never neglect this issue.
From the period when a child takes their first steps, learns to walk by falling and getting up, and becomes a source of joy for the family by uttering half-formed words, "games" should never be neglected. In this process, the directive of our beloved Prophet (pbuh), "Let those who have children act like children!.."(see Daylami, 3/513) should be adopted as a principle by parents, and special effort should be made to entertain children and play with them.
It is because playing games is the most beloved activity of children. Playing games with children by parents and other family members not only forms a solid foundation for relationships within the family but also significantly contributes to the intellectual and psychological development of the child. Our unique leader, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh), not only encouraged children to play and be entertained but also played with them himself, lifted his grandchildren on his shoulders and back, and hence made them laugh and enjoy themselves, fully highlighting the importance of playing.
During this period when a child's perception increases and their character begins to form, the child will become acquainted with the rituals of prayer and supplication by observing their parents. In this period, where imitation is generally prevalent, parents must set a very good example. If parents do not serve as role models in giving religious education, the chances of success are quite weak because family members who cannot serve as examples cannot possibly provide religious education to a child; and even if they did, it would not be effective.
The most ideal method in religious education and teaching is to worship together with the child, help them understand the importance of worship in a language they can understand, and encourage them to engage in worship. During the child's education, their psychological state should not be overlooked. Instead of using frightening examples, appealing and encouraging examples should be given continuously until adolescence.
In this period, tolerance and forbearance are highlighted as key factors, while communication with the child should be strengthened through body language and the allure of loving words should be used. Words filled with love, beautiful phrases, and words laden with praise and compliments will help solidify the child's connection with faith, and also positively affect their bond with the family.
Moreover, actions such as stroking the child's head or patting their back after worship, and encouraging them with words full of praise, are forms of spiritual rewards. This form of reward will effectively foster self-confidence, peace, and faith in the child.
Being balanced in love is also a crucial factor at this point. It is also a necessary behavior to make the child love what we love best. A moderate form of disciplined love is ideal. Parents, as the primary educators, should emphasize love, understanding, compassion, order, and discipline in their teaching.
Parallel to this, while parents do their best for the upbringing of their child, they should never neglect to pray to the Almighty Creator for their child to become a virtuous person, and they must always express gratitude for the blessing of their child, the "decoration and fruit of worldly life".
During this fundamental educational process, both parents should act together and should not neglect their duties or leave them to each other. If one parent shirks this responsibility, it means the education is realized by half. Essentially, the child's education is like a seesaw game, with parents at each end and the child in the middle. This game must be played in such a balanced way that neither side should overpower the other.
As understood from these explanations, from an early age, the child should receive strong lessons of belief within the family.
As Badiuzzaman Said Nursi puts it,
“If a child does not receive strong lessons of belief in childhood, it becomes very difficult for them to absorb the pillars of Islam and belief into their spirit later on; they become estranged. Especially if they do not see their parents as pious, and if their mind is educated only with worldly sciences, they become even more estranged.”
An important point derived from the statement above is to keep the child engaged in their activities and to make them enjoy what they do until they reach the age to perform real religious duties. In matters of spirituality, what happens at home is more significant for the child than anywhere else. When parents talk about religion to their children, they should focus on being "child-centered" not "adult-centered". That is, they should treat the child like an adult, but should not expect the child to act like one.
Another issue is ensuring that the education given by parents and school does not turn into a disruptive force in the child’s perception of education. Again, Badiuzzaman’s advice to high school students who said, “Our teachers at school do not talk about Allah,” was “If your teachers do not mention Him, every science speaks of Allah in its own language. Listen to them”, which is very meaningful in this context. In a secular educational paradigm where religious and worldly educations are sharply divided, a belief-focused view is not valid.
For pious parents or teachers, a child's ability to pray and their knowledge about planets should carry the traces of the same worldview. In this regard, the universe, the Quran, and the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) are different teachers teaching the same truth.
"It is not permitted to the Sun to catch up the Moon, nor can the Night outstrip the Day: Each (just) swims along in (its own) orbit (according to Law)."(Yasin, 36:40)
The Quranic verse above does not contradict the realities of the universe. They support each other. Similarly, every quality praised in the Quran is perfectly manifested in the life of the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).
The ultimate goal of ideal religious education is for the child to know their Lord who created, nurtured, sustained, and educated them. Home, school, and society should collectively aid the child in reaching this goal. During this aid, it should be considered whether the topic taught to the child is appropriate for their developmental stage.
Especially, the moral development stages of the child are of utmost importance in this framework. The first stage of moral development is infancy, where the child’s sense of right and wrong is merely what they feel about good and bad. The second stage occurs when the child just starts walking, and during this phase, they learn "right" and "wrong" from what others tell them. During the preschool years, which correspond to the third stage, the child begins to internalize family values as if they were their own and starts to comprehend and understand the consequences of their actions.
The fourth stage covers the ages of 7-10. The distinguishing feature of this period is the child beginning to question the infallibility of their parents, teachers, and other adults. The child has a strong sense of "should be done" and "should not be done". As the child enters the fifth stage, which encompasses pre-adolescence and adolescence, they prioritize their peers over adults, experimenting with different value systems within their peer group to find the one that suits them best. Especially during this period, it is advisable to guide children towards individuals who know religious and moral values and encourage them to make friends with such people.
From the perspective of parents, the developmental stages of a child's upbringing take on a different dimension. Roughly speaking, the 0-6 age period is characterized by "instruction", 7-10 age period by "encouragement", 10-14 age period by "warning", and beyond 14 years as the "tolerance period".
Accordingly, the child is first given important and fundamental religious instructions. Activities such as reciting adhan and iqamah, and teaching the child to say "La ilaha illallah = There is no god but Allah" can be considered as instructional activities. During the encouragement phase, the child is motivated to perform prayers, directed towards correct behavior, persuaded to eat less or share with friends. Those are examples of what can be done during the encouragement phase.
The warning phase is the last bend before adolescence. Here, the child begins to break free from parental authority gradually, striving to act independently. However, because they have not yet fully mastered controlling their emotions and willpower, they still encounter some coercive and warning disciplinary practices from their parents. Just as it is reasonable to show exaggerated affection to a child at a young age, it is equally reasonable to emphasize discipline a bit more during this period.
Finally, when the tolerance period arrives, we are faced with a young person who is considered an adult both physically and mentally. This young person should be treated as an adult, as seen in the Prophet's (pbuh) enlistment of young people into the army at this age. Pressuring them no longer benefits them. They can only be approached and benefited from through friendly and tolerant means.
From all these explanations, it will be appropriate to draw the following conclusion: Islamic education requires both consciousness and great effort. In this regard, the greatest responsibility lies with the parents above all.
(Hilmi Orhan - Zafer Magazine)
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Can a conceited believer not enter Paradise?
“Whoever has even a very small amount of conceit cannot enter Paradise.”(Muslim, Iman, 147; Abu Dawud, Libas, 26) The word conceit mentioned in the hadith above is interpreted in two ways:
1. The meaning of conceit here is “being conceited toward Allah and not being able to make oneself obey and serve Him”. Accordingly, it means that unbelievers cannot enter Paradise.
2. The same hadith is also interpreted as follows: “On the Day of Judgment, believers will be able to enter Paradise after their hearts are purified from conceit.” (Ibnul-Athir, an-Nihaya, 4/5) Accordingly, the bad characteristics in the heart of the believer is cleaned; and then, he enters Paradise because there are no bad habits and characteristics in Paradise.
A person who has a slight amount of belief in his heart will eventually enter Paradise no matter how sinful he is if he dies with belief; and even if he enters Hell, he will not stay there forever.
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Will you give information about the effect of worship on man and restraining him from bad deeds?
Prayer is a deed of worship that Allah wants from us. In addition to prayer, there are other deeds of worship and also haram (forbidden) deeds that we have to avoid. Thus, we will be rewarded for our good deeds and punished for our sins.
Besides, Allah will evaluate in the hereafter everything that man does. Our religion, which regards even removing something that hinders people from the way a deed of worship, will definitely not overlook worship, which is an important deed of worship.
For example, a girl who does not cover her head outside will get the reward when she performs a prayer; when she goes out without covering her head, she will receive a sin. One of them does not prevent the other.
The deeds and attitudes of a person who performs prayers should definitely be good. However, we cannot say "his prayer is not accepted" if he does a bad deed.
There is a rule:"When a general statement is made, the perfect form of it is understood." For example, when we say “man” the Prophet (pbuh) comes to mind. When we say physicist, the most famous one is understood. Similarly, what the statement "prayer restrains people from sins" brings to mind is the peak of prayer; it is the perfect result of prayer.
Every statement has some conditions. For example, suppose that it is written in the manual of a car that it can do 200 km/h speed. This statement does not mean that the car will always do 200 km/h with any driver. If that car is on a stabilized road and has some water mixed with gasoline in the fuel tank, if its front alignment is out of order, if its headlights are off or are not adjusted and if the driver is inexperienced, it will naturally not do 200 km/h; however, it does not mean that the statement in the manual is wrong. On the contrary, it is true, but some necessary conditions are not fulfilled. Therefore, the car will enable us to travel but it will not reach the speed we want.
Similarly, man is like a perfect and living car created by Allah. The eyes, which are the headlights of this car, what man eats, drinks, the places he goes to, what he thinks, his feet, in short, everything should be perfect so that he could get the result when he says a prayer or performs a prayer. Therefore, that statement is true if those conditions are fulfilled.
The statement "Every seed is a tree" is true. Although every seed has the program of a tree, it cannot be a tree if it is not planted in accordance with necessary conditions. Similarly, every prayer has a secret that leads man to Allah and causes his sins to be deleted. However, there are some conditions for this secret, which is like a seed, to be opened. He who fulfills the conditions like belief, worship, intention and avoiding harams will open it like a tree. It will cause his previous sins to be deleted. Otherwise, it will remain as a seed and will not reach to fruition. What is more, he will be held responsible for spending his life in the wrong place.
Worship prevents man from evil. However, we cannot say that it prevents everyone at the same level. In addition, this person, who commits evil even though he worships, might have committed worse deeds if he had not worshipped.
The interpretation of the verse of the Quran regarding the issue is as follows:
"Recite what is sent of the Book by inspiration to thee, and establish regular Prayer: for Prayer restrains from shameful and unjust deeds; and remembrance of Allah is the greatest (thing in life) without doubt. And Allah knows the (deeds) that ye do." (al-Ankabut, 29/45)
Recite the book that has been inspired to you repeatedly, regularly and in a nice way. That is, do not feel worried due to the mischief of the old-fashioned unbelievers; if you cannot recite the Quran to them, recite alone in a nice way and meditate on the states of the prophets and their nations mentioned in the verses of Allah. Therefore, you are not ordered “to recite to them” but to “recite” in general. Establish regular prayer; prayer definitely restrains from shameful and unjust deeds, immorality and evil, from inappropriate things that the mind and the religion do not like and from sins. When one performs a prayer, he cannot do any of them during prayer.
Besides, true prayer that is performed by knowing its reality restrains man from bad and inappropriate deeds outside prayer too. Forbidding does not ensure restraining fully but necessitates it. As man continues performing prayers truly and correctly, good deeds will increase. The following is reported from the Messenger of Allah (pbuh):
"If a person performs prayers and if prayer does not restrain him from open and secret bad deeds, he keeps away from Allah with that prayer."
Therefore, Ibn Mas'ud states the following:
"If a person does not perform prayers properly, prayer will keep him away from Allah."
The reason for it is that obeying the prayer occurs by performing it properly and paying attention to its boundaries. Its boundaries include prevention from all open and secret bad deeds.
Thus, obeying the prayer necessitates performing it properly and keeping away from what it prohibits.
"So woe to the worshippers Who are neglectful of their prayers." (al-Maun, 107/4-5)
As it is stated in the verses above, woe to those who seemingly perform prayers but who are unaware of what prayer is. Therefore, the following is stated in the Quran:
"The believers must (eventually) win through - Those who humble themselves in their prayers." (al-Mu'minun, 23/1-2)
The following is stated in the chapter of Taha:
"So serve thou Me (only), and establish regular prayer for celebrating My praise." (Taha, 20/14)
Thus, the wisdom behind and the purpose of prayer is celebrating Allah’s praise (dhikr).
"Then do ye remember Me; I will remember you." (al-Baqara, 2/152)
Thus, man will be remembered by Allah when he mentions Allah as it is stated in the verse above. Thus, prayer is a kind of miraj (ascension).
"Who bear in mind the certainty that they are to meet their Lord..." (al-Baqara, 2/46)
Those who know that prayer is ascension perform prayers with pleasure and with the intention and sincerity that they are always in the presence of their Lord. Mentioning Allah (prayer) is the greatest thing.
Thus, prayer, which means remembering Allah with all subtleties, details and realities and a slave’s presenting his weakness and needs to Allah with his attitudes in the presence of His magnificence, is the greatest reason that prevents man from open and secret bad deeds. Allah’s remembering you is greater than your remembering Him. When a slave remembers Allah with His majesty and beauty, he will avoid open and secret bad deeds in His presence and will elevate with his good manners and sincerity; when he thinks of Allah’s remembering him, he will not want to be remembered with any bad deeds in the divine presence; therefore, he will be full of the feeling of good deeds in order to attain Allah’s consent. Doubtlessly, this feeling will be a greater means of salvation than the previous one. One should think about how Allah mentions the people like Pharaoh on the one hand and the prophets and believers on the other hand. Besides, Allah knows whatever you do. He remembers you accordingly and punishes or rewards you accordingly. (see Elmalılı, the interpretation of the verse in question)
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Is the Quran an ethical interpretation distinguishing between what is true and what is wrong? Does it advise drawing a clear line between concepts or “finding the middle way”?
The elements of good and bad in the Quran are comprehensive concepts that cover all kinds of words, deeds, worship, ethics and transactions that interest the individual and the society. In other words, all of Allah’s commands are included in the concept of good and all of His prohibitions are included in the concept of bad. It is good to obey Allah’s commands and prohibitions and it is bad to violate them. Therefore, it is clearly stated in the Quran what is good and what is bad. However, there might be different approaches related to the issues that are not stated clearly because it is an area of ijtihad. The Prophet attracts attention to this issue and states the following:
“Both legal (halal) and illegal (haram) things are evident but in between them there are doubtful (suspicious) things and most of the people have no knowledge about them. So, whoever saves himself from these suspicious things saves his religion and his honor. And whoever indulges in these suspicious things is like a shepherd who grazes (his animals) near the Hima (private pasture) of someone else and at any moment he is liable to get in it. (O people!) Beware! Every king has a Hima and the Hima of Allah on the earth is His illegal (forbidden) things. Beware! There is a piece of flesh in the body if it becomes good (reformed) the whole body becomes good but if it gets spoilt the whole body gets spoilt and that (piece of flesh) is the heart.” (Bukhari, Iman, 39; Muslim, Musaqat, 107,108).
In the Quran, good people are described as “ABRAR (RIGHTEOUS)” and bad people are described as “FUJJAR (WICKED)”. We understand from the following statement of the Quran that those two concepts include all of Allah’s commands and prohibitions including “belief” and express taqwa in a sense:
“As for the Righteous (ABRAR), they will be in bliss; And the Wicked (FUJJAR) - they will be in the Fire.” (al-Infitar, 82/13-14).
The meaning of it is as follows: “Good (righteous) people will go to Paradise and wicked (bad) people will go to Hell.” The real good here is the believer and the real bad is the unbeliever; however, it is accepted by Ahl as-Sunnah creed that there are some believers who are included in the concept of bad in terms of deeds and that they will go to Hell and remain there for a while.
It is understood from Badiuzzaman Said Nursi’s statement “He who does not perform prayers is treacherous” that a person who does not perform prayers is ethically deficient like a person who tells lies, cheats people and steals.
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Is it a sin for a woman to go out?
If a woman covers all of her body parts that need to be covered in accordance with the rules of tasattur (hijab), she is not regarded to have committed a sin when others look at her. The person who looks at her with an evil intention is held responsible. However, the woman also needs to be careful with the way she walks and acts; she must not put on any make-up, perfume, etc. Besides, people will not look at such a woman with an evil eye. This is generally like that. There might be some exceptions but the woman is not regarded to have committed a sin then.
All about High Ethics
Islamic ethicists developed the issue of justice in ethics, in which Greek philosophers were also interested, by benefitting from the resources of the Quran and the Sunnah; thus, “the philosophy of Islamic ethics” emerged.