How do I abstain from masturbation successfully? Can You Enlighten Me About the Islamic Ruling on Masturbation, Its harms, Ways of Getting Rid of It?
We are living in an era in which To look at a woman whom to get marry with is permissible (prohibited to look at) decreases the sensibility of person towards prohibited actions. Especially those who cannot control themselves regard the situation as normal and permissible.
As a result, there occur some shortcomings in the physical and psychological system of a person.
In relation with this issue, Bediuzzaman Said Nursi (may God be pleased with him) states as follows.The prohibited glance (looking at what one should not) becomes common among the believers, sexual urge is provoked which results in prodigality because of abasement of the body. Ghusl (full ablution) becomes compulsory for him several times a week and therefore, according to scientists, his memory power weakens.
«Yes, indeed in this day and age, prodigality because of prohibited glance incited by bawdiness, a very common forgetfulness occurs especially in hot climates. More or less everybody is in this complaint. » 1
Prodigality sparking by not lowering the gaze is mostly done through nocturnal emission for the people who are overcome by their sexual desires. And some people fall to this prodigality in various forms. And among them, the masturbation is the most frequent way of seeking fulfillment of their lusts. Before anything else, this abnormal practice is observed among those whose determination is rather weak.
Our Almighty God orders to be virtuous to those who are not able to afford marriage though they are old enough: « Let those who find not the wherewithal for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah gives them means out of His grace. » (Light- En Nur,33). 2
The method that our prophet advises the young people compressed by their evil commanding soul and sensual desires is the best. In this way, he both worships and can make self-control.
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said, 'O youth, whoever of you can afford to marry, let him marry, for it spares one looking at what one should not, or lapsing in adultery. And if he cannot afford, let him fast, for it is a shield against evil.' (Reported by Ibn-i Mesut)
Especially fasting, keeping yourself busy with Islamic and belief issues, keeping contact with the people that keep you away from sins are the best remedies in order to preserve the chastity of a person and not to commit bad deeds. It is because Devil sparks off you to illegitimate ways and your evil commanding soul and desires pressures on you. The most effective solutions so as to abate them are to keep your soul and heart busy with sacred things, and to choose pious friends.
According to majority of the scholars it is not permissible to fulfill your sexual desires with your hand. It is considered Haram. “Those who guard their sexual organs except with their spouses or those whom their right hands possess, for (with regard to them) they are without blame. But those who crave something beyond that are transgressors.” (Al-Mu'mun: 5-7). Commenting on these verses, some scholars of Shafi, Maliki and imam-i Nesefi hold the view that masturbation is unlawful (Haram). 5
They assert that if it was allowed, it would have been given a sample from the life of our prophet. Imam Ahmet bin Hanbel and Ibn-I Hazm regarded semen as an excretion of the body like other excrete, and permitted its expulsion the same way like blood letting is permitted. However Hanbeli jurists gave permission to masturbation under two conditions: first, the fear of lapsing in adultry, and the second is not to be able to afford marriage.
ibn-i Abidin reporting the opinions of Hanef-i School gives some assessments of some scholars concerning this subject. Fakih Ebulleys affirms that I hope it is no sin to relieve sexual desire for a person whose carnality becomes so dominant that it occupies him more than anything else, who is single or can’t be together with his wife for some reasons. However, he will be sinful when he does so just to tempt his sexual appetites. 6
Moreover Shurunbilali being one of the scholars of Hanefi Jurists is of the opinion that masturbation is excusable for an unmarried man to release his tension during the risk of adultery. He gains neither sin nor good deed because of it. But he shall be sinful if it is done merely for the sake of pleasure. (7)
According to common view taken by some scholars, a person facing the danger of lapsing in adultery and therefore resorting to masturbation which is the lesser of two evils can be seen excusable intending not to commit fornication, to avoid haram and save his chastity. On the other hand, making masturbation a habit would be rather bad deed for a reasonable person. Anyway, overdoing it causes the loss of memory and intelligence.
In order not to experience these abnormal circumstances, it is essential to study Islamic works so often, occupy the heart and mind with Islamic services, meditate about sublime things, recall death breaking and souring the worldly pleasures, lower the gaze and not to show inclination towards obscene publications.
1. Kastamonu Lahikasi (Kastamonu Addendum), p. 92.
2. Nur Surah, 33.
3. Ibni Mâce, Nikâh : 1.
4. Mü'minûn Sûrah, 5-6-7.
5. Tefsirü'n-Nesefî, 3:114.
6. Ibni Âbidin, 2:100, 3 :156.
7. Meraku'l-Felâh, p. 57.
Note: we recommend you to read the following writings.
Some Harms of Masturbation:
1) Pshycological Aspects:
1- There occurs some repentance, absent-mindedness and sense of inferiority among the people excessively fond of masturbation. Most of the time a sense of remorse and depression happen after each self indulgence. Recollecting the fact that it is an act being afar from maturity, the people resorting it will develop a sense of inferiority and feel demoralized.
2- Masturbation habit leads to some neurological disorders. Too much irritation trembles on hand and arm, dizziness, sleeplessness, debilitation on backs and feet and tiredness are produced due to masturbation.
3- The habit of masturbation deprives a person of love and affection. Love is basic need for human being therefore the success of sexual intercourse between spouses depends on the mutual affection and passion. Foundation of happiness in marriage is based on love affairs. The sole sexual intercourse of the couples does not bring happiness; by joining in each other through love and passion besides physical contact, they need to become good friends. And yet those who are addicted to masturbation can’t get their shares of love coming out soul’s deepness. It blunts the love of gem.
4- Excessive masturbation brings about weakness of memory, inattention and forgetfulness. Memorization becomes more difficult for person too much addictive of it. They forget easily what they have memorized. They lack full concentration while studying a subject. They can’t work out easily what they read. For this reason the students excessively devoted to it have difficulty with their lessons. Considering sperm is not ejected through masturbation, the children who are yet to reach puberty are not so much adversely affected as the adults do; nevertheless overdoing it prevents mental development and causes concussion of the brain and neurological trauma.
5- Lust dreams and sensual fancies of those occupying themselves with onanism escalate. Once lying on the bed, the young person who is used to making masturbation keeps his conscious busy with groundless sexual dreams. Hence he both gets more accustomed to it and can’t think of good deeds anymore.
2- Phsical, Sexual and Social Harms of Over Masturbation:
Usually men do it with their hands. They rarely do it in the form of rubbing on pillow or bed. Different types of devices are put on sale just following the pornography was released free in the western. Designed to exploit people materially, these devices triggers depression on the people using them. Sexology recommends abstaining from those types of habits.
Onanism drives man to extreme. As a matter of fact masturbation never fulfills his sexual urge, nor gives satisfaction or contentment. Leaving his lusts unsatisfied, it drives him wild and sparks more. Hence, sensual desires of those who continue it become gradually intensified and thereby they go beyond the bounds. And this boosts its harms. Excessive sexual intercourse is harmful and yet over masturbation is more hazardous.
Too much onanism can lead to various ailments and sufferings. Even though it is not giving rise to disease directly, it indirectly brings on them. It is because that frequent masturbation causing a great deal loss of blood which in return decreases the natural resistance of the body brings about some sorts of complaints and disorders.
The onanism addictives can not luxuriate from sexual intercourse. Those who are exteremely used to doing it don’t place the necessary emphasize on sexual intercourse with his spouse. They can’t take much pleasure out of it. This condition might be observed in men and women both of whom are fond of masturbation. Because both are hooked on this practice, they can’t be satisfied with the intercourse that they have with their spouses. Masturbation attracts them more. They don’t hesitate practicing it following the sexual intercourse.
Masturbation can’t give, even one out of ten, the delight of sexual intercourse; despite this, it may still be an affliction for the youth. Compared masturbation with intercourse, the former is dunghill and the latter is rose garden. The All-Knowing God creating both women and men has kneaded them with an art and so skillfully that the pleasure taken during the sexual intercourse can’t be satisfied with any other artificial form.
As a result of self-indulgence, the body gets exhausted and stress occurs. Nevertheless, a successful sexual act enables the body to rest and refresh the soul. Since intercourse contain some mutual affection, passion, excitement and certain forms of chemical electricity interchanges. Lacking all of these, masturbation also ousts precious chemicals from the body. Consequently, there appear depression and tiredness in lieu of freshness.
Including urinogenital disorders and other disturbances, the act of masturbation causes incontinence being one of the most frequently encountered complaints of men throughout marriage life. Premature ejaculation means coming too quickly of the sperm during penetration. Rapid climax of man leaves woman unsatisfied. If this condition goes on, it brings forth uneasiness between the married couples. There are several factors for premature climax and onanism is among the leading causes. One cure of getting rid of it is to quit masturbation.
Over masturbation practice may result in sexual frigidity for the women. Frigidity is that woman does not get pleasure from intercourse and her unwillingness for it. One of the various causes of this frigidity is masturbation habit.
The strange point concerning this matter is that these people maintain this addiction even after marriage. They don’t pay attention to their spouses during the sexual acts being one of the most crucial marriage responsibilities. In the end, married couples lose their love to each other. The people enjoying to release their sexual lust by themselves prefer solitary places, always wish to be alone and play this bad game whenever they find opportunity.
The girls who masturbate by inserting some sorts of devices into their vagina might deflower their virginity. In medicine history, many cases were frequently observed for some substances remain inside and in turn necessitate surgical operation.
Some masturbation addictive young people cause other people to practice it as well. On top of their practicing this vile act, they bring on this malady to spread among many children and young people of the society.
A further detriment of masturbation is that married couples don’t nourish prurience and abhor each other inasmuch as the masturbation-addictive person fulfills his sexual lusts with other means. That means, they can’t find their expectations from each other and as a result they are disappointed. They fall out with each other and search for other satisfaction means. They might pursue illegitimate ways.
The truth concerning masturbation revealed by the scientists after a long research is that those continuing excessive masturbation are liable to develop hazardous mental illnesses. These are as follows: forgetfulness, weak determination, dysmnesia, preference for solitude, anxiety, being sorrowful, envisaging committing some sorts of crimes, suicide.
Likewise a certain number of attributes and bad habits that assault some perceptions impoverish the willpower, damage personality.
As regards to the decrees on masturbation ruled by Islamic law considering evil outcomes of masturbation, the following verses confirm this.
a) The Almighty God decrees that:
"Those who guard their sexual organs except with their spouses or those whom their right hands posses, for they are without blame. But those who crave something beyond that are transgressors.’’ (Mü'minun: 6-7)
The overall message of this verse is that “those who crave something beyond that are transgressors."
In that case fulfillment of sexual desires outside the framework of marriage and such extremes and repulsivenesses as committing adultery, homosexuality and masturbating with hand mean transgressing the boundaries.
The Cures to Abandon Masturbation
A) Getting married when reaching adolescence
This is the sharpest treatment to curb this vile habit. At the same time, it is the most natural remedy.
B) Voluntary Fasting
If there are some hurdles for not being able to marry at an early age, Islam advises the people who can’t afford marriage to fast. Because fasting curbs the density of sexual appetite, lessens lust, lowers sensual feelings; at the same time it both consolidates and inspires the thought that God Almighty is always watching him. It reminds the fear of God with respect. With regard to this issue, our Prophet is reported to have said that “O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guards his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual desire." Bukhari: 5066
C) Shunning the Places and Publications Tempting Sexual Thoughts
In the present time our society is bombarded with a plenty of spoiled, dirty and non-ethical presses and publications that degenerate morals of the youngsters. It is certain that this young human will get lost in quagmire, deviate from the true path, become deeply perplexed should he is inclined to those disgraceful mischief. His morality erodes, goes astray, becomes like a wild or tiro animal unaware of where it is heading to or what it is doing.
In that case, the responsibility of the educators is to give them advices, to work hard in order to provide them with the essential means that will warn and discourage them from doing so. This liability should be undertaken not only by the educators but also by everyone taking on the obligation to educate them. They must often indoctrinate them with the fact that looking at half naked woman, girls walking flirtatiously, females displaying their fleshes; reading magazines and novels arousing sexual sensations; listening to musical instruments and songs drawing our feelings into temptation and sensuality all keep us busy with superfluous fancies in the place of serious matters.
It is because that these publications ruin morals, impoverish the memory power, tempt sexual urges and spoil the personality.
D) Using One's Available Leisure Time in Beneficial Activities
According to educators, once a young is sitting idle and not engaged in something, they will be lost in devastating thoughts and dream of fantasies; ponder over sexual issues. As a result, if he has reached adulthood then his concupiscence will inevitably arise. At this point, failing to find other means so as to gratify his lust, he will be apt to masturbation and maintain it. Since he can only tranquilize the fierceness of his sexual appetite through masturbation.
Then what should we do in order to prevent them from these dreams and fantasies and what might be the reasonable treatments for them? The possible cures can be as follows:
First of all, we should instruct the teenagers about how to utilize from time, and how to make good use of the free time to a great extend.
In order to take advantage of free time, there are lots of worthwhile books, periodicals, and magazines and so forth. Besides, it should be instilled them on condition that they are accompanied with reliable and pious friends, they should make some healthy and useful sports strengthening body, making stronger the muscles and so on. Moreover, getting used to reading very beneficial books enhances their knowledge and broadens their horizons. In addition to it, we should not neglect of encouraging them to learn some handworks, handicrafts, letting them attend religious lessons and conversations improving morals.
Apart from these, we should pay significant care to urge them spending their time on activities that will clear and foster their minds, purify their souls, exalt the moral of them. In order to realize these objectives, it is beneficial to occupy the mind always with sublime matters, intensify the mind, heart and sensations with positive and efficient studies, always bearing in mind the goal of creation, reasoning the meaning of death and life, directing all time and energy into activities that leave no room for evil thoughts, getting them accustomed to helpful hobbies and habits.
E) Selecting Decent, Well-Mannered and Amicable Companions
One of the points that educators should concentrate on is that they are to seek and select well-behaved, pious friends for the young children who have just reached to adulthood. These friends remind them when they deviate away from the right path, guard them from erring; they abet his friends when they try to remain good; they solace them and consolidate their determinations when they face with a calamity.
It might be complained about that friends with these qualities are very rare, especially in our present time they are so few that one can count them on the fingers of his hand. Unfortunately that is the case, and yet it is possible to find these few fellows in almost everywhere, they are recognized through their faces, they have prostration signs over their foreheads; they are distinguished from the rest of the persons thanks to their virtuous manners.
Then it would be very nice for a youngster to find these companions and establish friendships with them. By this means, they assist him against dissipation and corruption of the life, constitute a community worthy of telling secret.
Without any doubt a man is upon the religion of his friend. A friend imitates his close companion in many respects. The birds only join in the bird groups similar to each other in shape. Our prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon Him) said: "The man is upon the religion of his friend. So each one of you should look carefully at the one he has taken as a friend. “(Tirmizi)
It is a well known fact that the person adopting the company of immoral, sinful, rebellious and mischievous people will be eventually perverted by them, be dragged into swamps and deep holes, they constitute friendships with him only for the sake of self interests, they come close with him by reason of worldly benefits.
Therefore our youth should stay away from such wicked friends, abstain from forming friendships with evil humans. What a happiness it is to find a pious companion, a righteous community! A friendship is like as a means for happiness in this world and hereafter, a cause to be saved in the next world. Allah, Glorified and Exalted is He, said in the Noble Book:
"Friends on that day will be foes, one to another,- except the Righteous. "
F-Scholarly and Religious Deeds for Treatment
1-Profitable and serious books should be read instead of the unnecessary works stimulating lust. The feelings and thoughts of a person are affected more or less with books he reads. To illustrate, should a person keep on reading about epic works for a while, he will develop some heroic sensations. There arouses an inclination within a man reading ethical works towards obeying morality principles. Reading romances, a man feels like falling in love.
2- Tightfitting pants or shorts should be avoided. The dresses so tight that put pressure on their sexual parts stir sexual wishes. This urges the young to masturbation. After all, narrow garments disturb and cause some troublesome to him. Those who are careful with their healthiness should not wear very tightfitting dresses.
3- Hairs of private parts should be shaved within two or three weeks or at least once a month. Otherwise there occurs some itches as a result of their growing.
4- Keep your legs apart as much as possible. Since if sexual organ not squeezed, lust can be taken under control more easily.
5-If any need for micturate arises while sleeping, it should be discharged as quick as possible. When urine waits to be discharged, the sensual desires arouse together with it. In this case, any masturbation wish might be provoked for the youngster. Then, becoming quick to wake up and discharging urine is a judicious precaution.
6- When lust is incited and any masturbation inclination arises, a good cure to tranquilize it is to wash the sexual organ with cold water thoroughly.
Going into the bathroom for taking a bath, the adults are facing with masturbation danger many times as the conditions are much convenient there. The best solution, here, to overcome this peril is firstly to wash the parts below the waist immediately, even to have a shower with cold water if possible. Thereafter, you should follow the necessary steps for taking bath. Reproduction parts should not be touched before these precautions. Though not being a problem for those who are able to predominate their carnalities, the people defeated by their sexual desires must be careful with these matters.
Now and then an ache happens-most probably due to over concentration of the blood- on the groin parts of the young people when they run across with a condition which highly sparks their lusts. This pain sometimes becomes so intense that it renders walking difficult. In this situation if ejaculation is done, the suffering disappears; but that is not necessary. If groin parts exposed to cold water or a bath taken, this trouble will fade out automatically within a few hours.
7- Occupy yourself with a work, do not become aimless and idle. In general, the fondest of masturbation are the people having nothing or little to do.
8- Engaging in sport activities. Every young person should absolutely do at least one sport appropriate to him. Watching football match is not a sport.
9- It would be better not to eat much the lust-enhancing foods such as hazelnut, pistachio nut, chocolate, banana and so on during bachelorhood years.
10- Stay away from sexually inciting talking. Unfortunately! Majority of the teenagers and adults are curious about sexual conversations. Therefore their private parts always attract them. Despite everything, the topics tempting sexuality should be ousted.
11- The unmarried people unable to abandon masturbation at all should get married when they grow up and can afford it. Nevertheless, they should give up this vile habit without fail after getting married. Marriage is basic, however carrying out the requirements is difficult.
G) From the Family Aspect
1- Having continued to act of masturbation during bachelorhood years, the people should give the required importance to sexual life in their marriages and should absolutely quit it. It is a well known fact that some don’t attach importance to the sexual needs of their mates on the grounds that they go on practicing masturbation even in their marriage lives. No matter if it may be woman or man, continuation the act of onanism after marriage is completely abnormal and imposes a great danger to the happiness of family happiness.
2- It should be conceived by the people who masturbated excessively before marriage that it is doltishness to waste their times in midden while there is flower garden waiting for them.
3- Preventive guides should be provided with the children who are yet in puberty. As the stage to be fallen into masturbation trap mostly begins at puberty, it is essential to offer them aidful recommendations and not to let them remain ignorant of such points. But these matters are so delicate. These instructions should not be in the quality that will incite sexual passions but should be intended merely for informing purposes that will secure them against all evil and harmful sexual factors. And its basement should rely on Islamic bringing up the child.
4-Don’t give free rein to children, and be cautious with their friends with whom they are keeping company. Since the wicked habits like masturbation are largely infected by the mischievous children around them.
5- Those compulsorily spending their time in hospitals or prisons should comprehend that it is no use of masturbation but to distress them more. It is acknowledged that masturbation causes grief and boredom on the human psychology. Then, the already sad people should flee from intensifying their troubles and worries more.
6- The adults should be inculcated about the harms and ways for protection against masturbation by obeying the realities. On condition you don’t frighten and dismay them much, you should teach them the important truths regarding masturbation in scholarly and moral qualities. Mostly this is incumbent on doctors and educators.
H) Religious and Spiritual Curatives
1-That masturbating is a sin and subject to divine penalty unless complusory cases should be realized.
2-It is a virtue for a man to make his spiritual side sounder by being a bit more patient and as a result overcoming the passion for masturbation instead of declining his spirituality by practicing masturbation which leads astray.
3- Considering that fasting plays a great role in cooling down the sensual sensations, sometimes it is possible to avoid the practice of masturbation by the virtue of fasting. Thus, it can be acquired both the merit fasting and repulsing onanism.
4-While misbehaving by masturbating, it should not be forgotten that our behaviors are being watched by God Almighty and Angels; unless we are compelled, it should be felt the shame of being seen by them in this state.
There exists no certain treatment for masturbation except for marriage. However, concerning this matter having a good grasp of facts and abiding by the protective cures, one can restrain himself from it. Hence domination over your willpower and sexual senses is the first stipulation.
In conclusion masturbation is such a bad habit that the more you keep it doing, the more it hooks you, and once relinquished its evilness declines. Not practicing it at all is the sole and the most ideal recommendation. The masturbations practiced at a push involuntarily should not reach such extend to prevent wet dreams occurring in between some weeks. As the natural and healthy way of releasing sexual tension is indigenous wet dreams happening at regular intervals during bachelorhood years.
I) Learning Scientific Advises, Using Preventive Medicine
One of the points that the doctors persistently emphasize in order to lessen the affect of stimulation and to stop lust is to abide by the following suggestions:
1-Increase having cold baths in summer and pour cold water on the reproductive organs frequently in other seasons
2-Engage in sports and persistently pay special attention to physical exercises
3-Abstain from spices and all types of food that incite the sexual drive
4-Give up or cut down on the invigorating beverages such as tea, coffee and so forth
5- Reduce intake of meat and eggs to a minimum
6-Do not lie down on your stomach or flat on the back. Instead lie on your right side turning to qiplah (direction of Mecca) in compliance with Sunnah.
J) Fear of Allah Almighty
It is beyond doubt that a man will take account of his every act, will fear omission of a duty or a service, of being transgressor or going astray, if he thinks of that Allah is always watching him and is aware of everything that he does, no matter if they are apparent or hidden. If the idea is rooted in a person that The Almighty God is constantly watching him, Allah will call him to account because of his sins, going beyond the boundaries, He will punish him due to his disobedience then he will, without any doubt, shun all kinds of destroying acts, misbehaviors and perversities.
As known, it will increase the fear of Allah, amplify the respect and love of Allah that attending the gatherings in which Allah is eulogized, enduring compulsory and voluntary prayers, rising in the latter portion of the night for the night prayer (tahajjud Salah) while the rest are asleep, performing optional fasts, listening to the chronicles, services, manners and virtues of the companions of our prophet, making friendship with the eximious people, keeping contact with the righteous, remembering the death and the next world. Also, these considerations let him know that He is absolute Watcher and by these meanings, man will be more conscious and cautious before Him.
Then what is worthy of a faithful young is:
To follow the right path by strengthening the conviction that Allah is always supervising him, to root in his heart fear, love and respect of Allah. In order that, lots of trivial things do not divert him from the destination to which he is heading. He is not assaulted by the deceptive, seductive amusements of the world. Hence he should take as guidance the following two orders of Allah:
“And Hell-Fire shall be placed in full view for him who sees- Then, for such as had transgressed all bounds, And had preferred the life of this world, The Abode will be Hell-Fire;And for such as had entertained the fear of standing before their Lord's (tribunal) and had restrained (their) soul from lower Desires, Their abode will be the Garden.” (Those Who Tear Out (An-Náziàát), 37-41)
Is a Muslim man allowed to be married to two sisters?
No, he cannot. The following is stated in the Quran: “Prohibited to you (for marriage) are:― your mothers, daughters, sisters, father's sisters, mother's sisters; brother's daughters, sister's daughters, foster-mothers (who gave you suck) foster-sisters; your wives' mothers; your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives to whom ye have gone in,―no prohibition if ye have not gone in,― (those who have been) wives of your sons proceeding from your loins; and two sisters in wedlock at one and the same time...” (an-Nisa, 23)
According to that verse, a man cannot marry two sisters at the same time. However, if his wife dies or if he divorces his wife, then he can marry is wife’s sister. As a matter of fact, Hazrat Uthman married Ruqayya, the daughter of the Prophet and then when she died, he married Umm Kulthum, the other daughter of the Prophet.
It is said that if the spouses see the sexual organs of each other, it will cause disrespect between them; is it true? Is it objectionable to look?
There is no such limitation. The spouses may look at every part of each other.
We regard it useful to present the issue in several items:
- There are many hadiths in fiqh books – regarding details – used as evidence. The ummah acts based on those hadiths. There is a rule developed by Islamic scholars: “It is permissible to act in accordance with weak hadiths regarding the virtues of deeds.” Accordingly, to accept that the issue of the relevant hadiths is about virtues and to act in accordance with them will only make a person gain rewards.
- As far as we can see, in fiqh books, there is no expression like, “it is haram for spouses to look the private parts of each other.” However, it is stated to be makrooh (abominable) based on hadiths like the following hadith: “When one of you wants to have sexual intercourse with his spouse, they should not be naked like donkeys”(Ibn Majah, Nikah, 28; Naylu’l-Awtar, 6/189) (see W. Zuhayli, al-Fiqhu’l-Islami, 3/555).
In Majmau’z-Zawaid, the hadith above was reported from Bazzar and Tabarani, who reported it from Abdullah b. Masud, and was regarded as weak. The reason is as follows: “In the chain of transmission, Mandal b. Ali, who is regarded as weak, is present. However, some scholars said he was trustable. The rest of the narrators are the narrators of Bukhari.” (4/393-Shamila)
- According to a narration of Ibn Majah (Nikah, 28), Hazrat Aisha said, “I have never seen the sexual organ of the Messenger of Allah.”
- According to Shafii madhhab, it is mustahab (recommended) for a person not to look at his/her own private parts in the toilet and not to touch them unnecessarily. (see Nawawi, Majmu, 2/94).
- It is not haram or a sin for a person to open and look at his/her own private parts when he/she is alone in the bathroom or a room. However, it is better to cover them. (see Nawawi, ibid, 2/166, 197, 204-206).
- Ibn Hazm, one of the imams of Zahiri madhhab, says it is not abominable for spouses to look at the private parts of each other. He regarded the hadith reported from Hazrat Aisha and mentioned above as weak because there is an unknown woman in the chain of transmission. He states that there are also narrations showing that it is not abominable, and he shows this hadith as evidence: “The wives of the prophet, Hazrat Aisha, Hazrat Umm Salama and Hazrat Maymuna washed themselves from the same container as Hazrat Prophet (pbuh).”(al-Muhalla, 10/33; Huwayni, al-Fatawa’l-hadisiya, 1/45-Shamila).
- According to what Imam Ahmad, Abu Dawud, Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah and Hakim reported from Muawiya b. Hida, Hazrat Prophet said to her, “Do not show your private parts to anybody other than your husband and female slave. (see Huwayni, al-Fatawa’l-hadisiya, 1/44-45- Shamila).
- Taking into consideration the hadith of Hazrat Aisha, "I and the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) used to take a bath from a single pot called 'Faraq'.” (Bukhari, Ghusl, 2), Dawudi said it was not abominable for spouses to look at the private parts of each other showing the above-mentioned hadith as evidence.
The following information that Ibn Hibban reported from Sulayman Bin Musa confirms it: According to that information, when Sulayman Bin Musa was asked about the situation of the people who looked at the sexual organs of their wives; he said:
I asked Ata about it. He said to me, “I asked it Hazrat Aisha. She told me the above-mentoned hadith.” Ibn Hajar tended toward that view, too (see Ibn Hajar, Fathu’l-Bari, 1/364).
- To sum up: The narrations of the hadiths that spouses should not look at the private parts of each other are weak. Contrary to those narrations, there are sound hadiths that show it is permissible for spouses to look at the private parts of each other.
- However, some scholars say it is abominable stating, “It is permissible to act in accordance with weak hadiths regarding the virtues of deeds”.
As a matter of fact, in Hanafi fiqh books, taking into consideration the hadith of Hazrat Aisha, which is regarded as weak, and some other hadiths, the following judgment is given: “Although it is permissible for spouses to look at the private parts of each other, it is more virtuous not to look at. (For instance, see al-Mabsut, 12/363; al-Badai’, 10/473-75-Shamila).
Some Shafii scholars say it is permissible for spouses to look at the private parts of each other but others say it is not. Imam Nawawi said the view of those who said it was permissible was more correct. (see al-Majmu, 16/ 134-135).
- Those explanations show that some Islamic scholars take some hadiths regarded as weak into consideration too and therefore say it is not a sin for spouses to look at the private parts of each other but it is better not to look at.
when is salat istikhara offered?
There is no private time for the salat of İstikhara. As it can be performed during the night, also it can be performed during the day. But it is mostly performed before going to bed.
How can I get rid of homosexual urges? What steps should I follow?
We congratulate you on your efforts to reach an answer...
What is important for us is your being persuaded mentally. In the application period, that is while carrying it out, it will not be as fast as you think. It is quite natural.
Let us make a list to change the behavior and to end it together, and make a course of action.
However, first of all, we would like you to have some information about some concepts. The first one is the will; the second is the mind and the third one is the soul (nafs).
We will give partial information about the relationship of those concepts with each other.
However, as your information about those concepts increase, you will be more successful in carrying out the course of action we will give you.
Let us start with your will: your ability to choose… or your freedom to prefer something. Your will that makes you different from all other creatures....
To be able to choose...
Naturally, to choose necessitates options... well, how do options form and how do we choose?
Options are created by the divine power both in the opposite poles and in the same pole at different levels.
That is, there are both good things and bad things but there are different options in both good things and bad things...
How do we choose the good and the bad? Based on what?
Here the concept ‘the soul’ is in question...
The soul is the center of requesting or wishing in man...
It can be used both for the good and for the bad.
Satan, which represents the bad, together with the soul, always suggests using our will in the bad way...
That is, Satan seduces our mechanism of requesting into the bad...
However, to request something and to choose something are two different things....
We may want something but we might not do it; we may want something and do it...
The key point is this: man would choose the bad but for the soul...
Therefore, the angels never disobey Allah...
They obey the divine orders because they have the mind. However, since they do not have the soul, this obedience (choice) does not give them any perfection.
It is because it is a choice that has no alternatives or options...
How can we know whether what we want is good or bad?
Here, it is the duty of the mind...
God Almighty presents us the good and the bad through the prophets and books He sends...
He does not leave it to us to decide what is good and what is bad...
What if we did not have the mind?
We would not be responsible for any of our choices...
Just like child who is not mentally developed, who is not punished even when he commits a murder because he does not know what is good...
What if we did not have the soul? We would be like angels...
We would not be able to choose the bad because we would not have an element that forced us to choose it, that is, we would not have a mechanism that desires the bad...
Generally, that is the reason why one cannot do something although he knows that it is good...
You know it but you do not want it...you want it but you have difficulty in doing it...They are all related to the mechanism called the soul...
That is, to know the good and the bad is something and to do the good and the bad deeds is something else...
Let us put together what we have written so far...
First, we are created with an ability to choose...
Then, we are sent to a world where there are choices...
We are left free to make our ability to choose operate...
Then, the divine orders teach us what is good and what is bad.
Then, our souls want to choose the bad due to the influence of Satan...
Allah wants us to choose what He wants by using our will (despite our soul)...
Now, let us deal with your situation
Is homosexuality forbidden by the divine order?
Yes, it is...
You know it through your mind...
However, your soul chooses homosexuality because it works based on the principle of pleasure...
Then, Satan puts a great pressure on you with those choices using the mechanism of pleasure and blocks your will...
Seemingly, you choose but... actually, there is a giant mechanism of desire, the soul, behind your will...
So, what shall we do?
The main element to tend toward a certain behavior in man is the benefit… pleasure...
However, some people believe the benefit is related to the good and some think it is related to the bad...
Those who claim that the benefit is related to the bad give their momentary pleasure that take place immediately as evidence.
That is, they say, "If it were something bad, I would probably not like it."
Those who believe that the benefit is related to choosing the good give the hereafter as evidence.
That is, they say, "Although the things that I am ordered to do not give me a benefit or pleasure at once, they will do so in the future": they trust the divine order and continue their lives...
Therefore, you should not take into account the pleasure that the situation which you are in gives you...
You should deal with what Allah orders you using your mind; you should not take into account the fact that your soul wants it and Satan promises you momentary pleasures...
You should not heed the fact that your soul does not like it when you give up that deviation...
You are a human being!!!
You have a heart!! You have a mind!!!
You should use your will based on the direction that your belief and your mind show you!
First of all, you should believe that if Allah orders you to give up something, it is harmful for you.
In the second phase, this belief will not be transformed into action immediately! You will fight the threats of Satan and your soul because you are created with perfect equipment that can choose the good although you want the bad...
And you love Allah so much that you will do what He wants despite your soul wants something else!!!
Do not be scared; your soul will support you after a while if you keep it away from Satan...
Show your soul and prove that Allah is the owner of you by surrendering your will to the orders of Allah!
Call your soul to believe in oneness, that Allah is the only God, that the soul is not its own god and that your soul is nothing but a weak and beloved slave of Allah.
In the third phase,
Keep away from the relations triggering that attitude... perform fasting for a while...
In the fourth phase,
If you want what we have explained so far to be effective, never hand over the reins to Satan and your soul even if you commit a sin...
Repent...control yourself, determine where you lost the thread and find out systems to regain.
Never give up the struggle...when you feel hopeless, take refuge in Allah.
Allah will satisfy you so much in your struggle that the things that your soul offers you will be like a glow-worm compared to the sun... Believe it and see it!
In the fifth phase,
Increase your worshipping and knowledge... You cannot carry out this struggle with the equipment you have!!!
You need to increase your weapons and improve them...
It is not appropriate for a person to break a promise that he gives to himself but there is no kaffarah (atonement) for it.
According to Islamic Jurisprudence, 1/8 of the inheritance belongs to the wife. The rest is shared out among the sons and daughters, but sons are given two times more than daughters.
As for your question, divide the amount into 48 pieces;
6/48 of it is given to the wife.
14/48 of it is given to each son.
7/48 of it is given to each daughter.
Mathematically 1200000/48 = 25000
6*25000 = 150000 (this is the share of the wife)
7*25000 = 175000 (this is the share of each daughter)
14*25000 = 350000 (this is the share of each son)
How should we understand the bothering of man by Satan mentioned in Sura Zuhruf verse number 36?
Surah Zuhruf verse number 36: If anyone withdraws himself from remembrance of ((Allah)) Most Gracious, We appoint for him an evil one, to be an intimate companion (qareen) to him.
In man’s inner world there is a duality, a conflicting tendency and attraction. The good one of these two -that is pulling towards Allah’s pleasure- comes from the faculty of religion in human nature, from the pre-eternal contract, the divine spirit and the angel. As long as man -with the assistance of the education he receives and using his free will - leaves himself to this attraction (which is what Islam means) and listens to the message of the Messenger, the aspect of the soul towards the divine spirit develops and its colour covers the whole.
As long as he submits to the bad power pulling towards the lowest level of existence and turns away from the divine message his consultant is a demon appointed for him. The demon’s duty -contradictory to the angel- is to distance man from Allah and make him a slave of his desires. A man who lives such a life and then dies will realise how wrong his acts and choice were when he is brought to the presence of his Lord, however it will be too late then.
(Prof. Dr. Hayrettin Karaman, Prof. Dr. Mustafa Çağrıcı, Prof. Dr. İbrahim Kafi Dönmez, Prof. Dr. Sadrettin Gümüş, Kur’an Yolu: IV/667.) Why were the Devil and the bad things created?
In fact “He (Allah) cannot be questioned for His acts” (the surah 21:23). However we, as human beings, want our heart to be satisfied just like Ibrahim (AS) (the surah 2:260). Therefore the following question comes to our minds:
Why has Allah created the Devil and the bad things and set them to pester us? Isn’t it evil to create evil and bad to create bad?
We immediately would like to say that creating bad things is not bad, however committing them is bad. Allah doesn’t create something to be bad; on the contrary He creates it to be good. We turn things that Allah creates to be good into bad things for ourselves. For example the Devil was created from fire and the best example in this matter is the fire. The creation of fire isn’t bad but touching fire is. If man keeps fire under control he makes use of it otherwise it harms him.
Another example to this matter is the rain. There are thousands of consequences of rain falling, and all of them are good. If through ill choice, some people receive harm from the rain, they cannot say that the creation of rain is not mercy, they cannot state that the creation of rain is evil.
Allah Almighty has also created angels who do not possess the ability to commit sins and animals which are not responsible at all. Apart from these two types of creatures he has created mankind who can be so perfect that it can surpass angels or be so bad that he falls below animals which don’t have intelligence. At this point the Devil was given a chance in order to open a way for man’s progression and man was given a soul (nafs) which commands evil.
The world is the field of the hereafter. Paradise and hell which are two dwelling places of the Hereafter will be the fruits of man’s faiths and deeds. Therefore mankind has been subjected to an examination. Those who spend their lives with good faith and good deeds and maintain uprightness in their deeds acquire a value worthy of Paradise. Those who go in the opposite direction become the people of hell.
If man doesn’t follow his evil-commanding soul and doesn’t listen to devil he will progress spiritually and can attain a rank higher than the angels. If he does otherwise he can fall below animals.
As is known, the origin of diamonds and coal is carbon. Due to different arrangement of the atoms one has become diamond and the other coal. Similarly the essence of humans is the same. All human beings are created with same material and immaterial faculties. Due to employing these in the right or in the wrong way, discrepancies between humans have come into existence and in society people with diamond-like spirits and people with coal-like spirits have arisen.
Another dimension of this matter is as follows: man by following devil causes harm for himself but due to the rule “The cause is like the doer” the Devil then also bears a great responsibility and increases his own torment in hell. The chance to deviate people, which he asked to be given to him, will cause further trouble for him and in addition to his own he will be punished with the torment of those who he misguided.
If Allah Almighty had wished, he could have not given this chance to the Devil. Then his duty would have been fulfilled by the human soul. The result would be the same. By being given the chance to work in order to deviate people, Devil has gone into a great harm, if appropriate to say, he has been punished for his arrogance in this way.
taking wife back after first talaq
Marriage and talaq are very sensitive and important subjects. For this reason the matter changes according to intention and what is said by the teller. We see that the answers given by e-mail are being understood wrongly and different comments are being held. In this respect, we do not approve to answer the matter of talaq by e-mail.
We advice the brother who said this words to go to Mufti or Imam (official learned in Islamic law who is in charge of Islamic affairs for a province or district) and to tell the situation and to behave inaccordance with it.
How many sunnahs and fards are there in Jum'ah, Friday prayer?
There are four rakats of the first sunnah, two rakats of fard and two rakats of the last sunnah in the prayer of Friday.
Is it permissible for me to prepare a fake "Experience Certificate"?
Unfortunately, it is not possible to give a positive answer to your wish. First of all, the money intended to be given is a kind of bribe, and moreover a bribe to acquire an unlawful profit. You can call this unlawful or a sin.
Our humble advice is, before anything else, go to a specialist in order to improve your health. Even if the troubles that bother you are financial, it is highly probable as a result that now you are under stress or in depression. It is very important for you to be saved from spiritual troubles through such a health care; and that is vital for you to succeed in any work that you start, too. There is no drawback in searching for the ways to have free health care in public hospitals.
It should not be forgotten that not even a leaf falls down without Allah's permission. You should search for work through lawful means. Don't forget that we are in a test. Just as in abundance and joy we are responsible for offering thanks, so too in hardships we are responsible for bearing patiently. We wish patience for you, quick recovery, and fruitful work and we pray to our Lord that He opens up a door of lawful livelihood for you in a short time.
“Whoever keeps from disobedience to God in reverence for Him and piety, He makes his affair easy for him” (The Qur’an, At-Talaaq, 65:4)
In the first intercourse not having the expected bleeding, that is to say, in a situation that a husband who understands that her wife does not have virginal membrane or sees that it is torn, can he divorce his wife?
According to the views of majority, that situation can not be a reason for divorcement. Because:
Even if virginity is very important, virginal membrane may be torn as a result of bouncing, falling from somewhere or jumping from a high place. As a principle it is known that “till it is proved, a person may not be regarded as an accused. So, in such a situation, it is best to make a judgement on behalf of woman supposing that the virginal membrane may have been torn because above mentioned reasons. Nor can woman’s husband, nor can court, nor can someone else ask woman a question such as “Why has it been torn?” No one has such a right.
Even if it is come out during the sexual intercourse that the woman’s (who is thought to be a virgin when marrying) virginal membrane is torn, the“mihr” (livelihood) of the woman can not be lessened. (Hukuk-i Islamiyye and Istilahat-i Fikhiyye Kâmusu)
The control of virginity only can be done in such situations: If woman with the claim of “my husband is not able to have a sexual intercourse with me” goes to the law, judge looks; if man is convenient for treatment, one year time is given to man and wanted him to have treatment. After at the end of that time, if woman still claims that her husband still is not having intercourse with her… and man denies that, virginity control may be done. This control is only for the claim of woman for making a decision of divorcement.
relationship between muslim and nonmuslim
Without nikah (marriage contract) a Muslim woman or a man has got to obey some rules that Islam made forbidden towards opposite genders (whether they are Muslim or not). They are not allowed to talk each other something that Islam made forbidden, are not allowed to see their private parts, and are not allowed to be alone together. For this reason, a Muslim woman even when speaking with a man must be attentive. Especially there are so many applications that they are forbidden according to Islam.
A Muslim woman is not allowed to marry a non Muslim man. Even if they make nikah, their nikah is invalid.
talak in islam
A woman has a right of getting Talaq from her husband. If a man gave her wife the right of Talaq (divorcement) beforehand then she can divorce from her husband.
A woman who divorces from her husband has to wait the iddah period.
She can get marry again after the iddah period.
Inheritance- when ones have only daughters (no son)
The answer for your first question:
If the dying is man:
All of his property is accepted as 27 parts.
Each of his doughter gets : 8/27
His wife gets : 3/27
His father gets : 4/27
His mother gets : 4/27
There is nothing for the brother and sisters of that person, because if father and mother stil live, they can not get anything.
The answer for your second question:
As we expressed above, if mother and father still live, they have right to get the inheritance. The brother and sisters of that person are not to get anything.
The answer for your third question:
That will is acceptable. A person before dying can bequeath a certain amount of his property. But, ıt can not be bequeathed to the heirs. Because our Prophet said that: “It can not be bequeathed to the heir.” (Tirmizi, Vesaya 5, 2122; Nasai, Vasaya 5)
However, if he makes a donation when he is alive, -although it is not advisible-, this donation is valid.
Is slavery permissible in Islam? Is sex with slave girls owned by a person is legitimate?
The First Answer:
In Islam, slavery and concubinage were not the positions that Islam brought, but they were the status that firstly been tried to be reformed and in the course of time aimed to be removed completely. And as the result of nations all over the world came to the same reason, it has been vanished. However, we should not forget this that, today, in many parts of the world, there are starvelings, the unemployed and the homeless, and many of them are being used as old slaves and bondmaids. Poverty and freedom cannot be together and also deprivation enslaves people. Thus, humanity by removing slavery only has done a small portion of what they should have done. The aim of Islam is to offer freedom and just for the people all over the world. Unless accessing those two aims in a new world order, humanity of the world will be in a big responsibility, furthermore, they will be in consequences of that action. Those who do not believe in, therefore, their conscience must twinge (For the blood, tears flowed unjustly and suffering that experienced.). And those who believe in must not forget that Allah, one day, will interrogate them for that. The Second Answer:
Marriage contract is an agreement which is done between a free man and woman (in this respect also those who possess their bodies as well) in order to establish a family and benefit from each other in sexual way and accepting that conditions. The agreement and disposal which provide to possess (to buy or to get with heritage, booty or donation) the bondmaid are a legal transaction. And this legal transaction provides a right to live like a husband-wife between the owner and bondmaid. And also that way stands for marriage contract and is stronger and more comprehensive than it. (Prof. Dr. Hayrettin Karaman)
Two kinds of marriage are mentioned in the following verses, in the Qur’an: One is about the marriage that solemnized with a free woman, and the other is about a bondmaid.
“They/Believers, guard their modesty. Except with those joined to them in the marriage bond, or (the captives) whom their right hands possess,- for (in their case) they are free from blame.” (The Qur’an, Al-Muminun, 23/5-6).
“If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice, two or three or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (a captive) that your right hands possess.” (The Qur’an, An-Nisaa, 4/3).
- The marriage which is done with a bondmaid is mentioned in the verse as “whom their right hands possess”. That is in another saying called “milku’l yemin” or “akdu’l milk” (the contract which shows the ownership of a bondmaid).
In Islamic jurisprudence, one more important concept concerning with that subject is the concept of “tasarri”. Its meaning is to decide to own a slave maid as a wife and to live with her henceforth. According to the Islamic law, the case of “tasarri” does not occur merely with getting a bondmaid. Except for the agreement of marriage (nikah), all of the conditions must be prepared in accordance with a marriage that solemnized with a normal woman. According to the sect of Hanafi, there are two conditions in order the “tasarri” to be carried out: The first is he must prepare a house for (bondmaid) her like his other wives who are free. And the second is he must have time for her, as he has time for his other free wives. According to Ebu Yusuf, man’s being in a desire of having a child from her (bondmaid) is a condition as well (see al-Badai, 8/344-45-shamile). These two conditions are valid in the sect of Shafii (see Muqni’l Muhtac, 20/316; Nihayetu’l Muhtac, 29/343- shamile). Why there is no need for a marriage contract with a bondmaid?
Because, the agreement of “milq” is more efficient than a marriage contract. A marriage contract is an advantage contract. But in the agreement of Milq, there is an ownership to a concerned person, so the contract of Milq requires owning that concerned person. And the advantage contract occurs depending on that agreement (see the article called as “Mahmud Hamdi Zakzuk, at-Tasarri”).
-The arbiters on that subject are Islam scholars and fiqh sources. The judgments that the Ummah (the community of Our Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) whom follow Islam) complied with has been in accordance with those sources.
- According to the Islam scholars, in order that a man can be together with a woman is possible only in two ways: The contract of marriage or the contract of Milqul Yemin (keeping the personality of a bondmaid in his hands with a contract) (see Reddu’l Muhtar, 3/163).
IS IT PERMISSIBLE FOR WOMEN AND MEN TO HAVE PIERCING DONE? DOES IT HAVE ANY DRAWBACKS RELIGIOUSLY AND CULTURALLY?
It is not appropriate for the nature of human beings to have tongue, lip or other piercings, regardless of gender. However, it is permissible for girls to pierce their ears and wear earrings. However, it is not right to pierce the nose, tongue, lip and etc and wear studs. Moreover, it is not appropriate for a woman to show her jewelry to men who are legally permitted to marry her. In this sense, as a woman’s piercing would be visible to those men, it should not be put onworn.
Women cannot quit jewelry because of their nature. They can put on jewelry which they can afford. Necklaces, bracelets and rings can be put on without any application on the body. However, earring is not like that. Though some earrings can be put on directly on ears, most of them can be put on after piercing ear.
Is it permissible to pierce ears to put on such earrings?
According to the books of Islamic jurisprudence such as Raddu’l-Mukhtar and al-Fatawa’l Hindiyya from Hanafi sect, and Ianatu’t-Talibin from Shafi’i sect; it is unobjectionable for women and little girls to pierce their ears and put on earrings (Raddu'l-Mukhtar, 5: 270; al- Fatawa’l -Hindiyya, 5: 358). That kind of an application was also made in the time of Prophet (pbuh) and it was not prohibited. (Ianatu’t-Talibin, 4: 175)
However, some Shafi’i scholars do not consider it permissible to pierce little girls’ ears because it will give pain for nothing. Today, these kinds of considerations do not exist, because ears can be pierced with a painless method. (Mehmet Paksu, Kadın, Aile, Hayat, Nesil Yayınları).
Piercing ears to put on earrings is considered permissible for women in Islamic law, however, it is not considered permissible for men. Some Islamic jurisprudents claim that little boys’ ears can also be pierced and examples of this was seen in the time of our prophet too, and it was not prohibited. In all cases, according to the majority of Islamic jurisprudents, it is haram for men (from puberty on) to pierce their ears or to wear earrings and according to some it is makruh i.e. abominable. It is not permissible for women to show their jewelry to men out of their family. For this reason, if a woman gets a piercing, she should avoid showing it to men. According to the majority of Islamic jurisprudents, it is haram, and according to others it is makrooh for men to put on earrings or studs.
Influence of Culture
An important issue which should be paid attention is the fact that culture, religion and ideology coexist in the same body. It is impossible to separate them.
If someone tries to separate culture and religion from each other and succeeds in it—though it is difficult—he/she also starts to change religion. The religion which loses its body slowly passes away (from the lives of people) and the religion or infidelity of the new culture comes.
As there is such relation between culture and religion, the change of culture closely affects religion. One of the five essential aims of Islam is to protect religion (Islam in people’s lives). An act, a cultural change or a cultural imitation affecting the protection of religion in an unfavorable way is haram and sometimes it also leads to infidelity.
Our dearest Prophet (pbuh) found out that two festivals were celebrated in Madinah for a long time when he migrated to Makkah. As festivals are important cultural elements which can influence religion, he changed them and replaced them with Ramadan (eid al-fitr) and Sacrifice (aid al-adha) festivals. In many other hadiths, he prohibited many traditions and applications which were related to other religions or had a symbolic value/function for other religions.
You can give the interest money to any needy person. It is permissible.
Is it permissible for a Muslim man to keep a beard stylishly, without any religious intent or purpose?
Like all Prophet our Prophet (PBUH) too grew his beard and advised his followers to grow their beards. We do not have any narration that narrates that our Prophet or his companions shaved their beards, but we have information that our Prophet (PBUH) snipped his beard to give form to. (Tirmizi, Edeb, 17). So growing beard is sunnah. To grow a beard with the intention of fulfilling the sunnah and then shaving it is makruh (abominable). However growing the beard without any intention of fulfilling the sunnah and then shaving it is mubah (the things which performing them or not is permissible in religion).
As for growing a beard stylishly without any religious intention there is no drawback. But we know that our Prophet (PBUH) prevented his companions from resembling Jews or Christians or the others who are not Muslim.
Your age is mature enough for marrying. In Islam, one does not have to marry a member of one’s relative. Islam only forbids a woman to marry a non-Muslim man and forbids a man to marry an idolater woman. In the situation you ask about, according to the sects of Shafii, Hanbali and Maliki you can not marry without permission of your family. However, according to the Hanafi sect, you can marry without permission of them. It is better and advisable for both of you to get your family’s consent. But, if you still insist on marrying and if you are not a Hanafi, you can change your sect into Hanefi. Then, there shall not be any drawback in terms of religion.
For further information, please click on the link given below.
Menstruation is a natural type of blood that flows at regular intervals from a woman’s uterus after puberty. God has laid down certain rules in connection with this, as a concession to the woman, in consideration of her condition.
Menstruation usually lasts 3 to 10 days and nights, varying from woman to woman. Most women have a regular number of days for their monthly menstrual period. The number of days may fluctuate and the period might come a little early or a little late. So when a woman sees menstrual blood, she should consider herself to be menstruating. When it stops, she should consider herself clean. If more blood appears after her menstrual period has ended, but does not have the same color as menstrual blood, it should not be considered as menstruation.
The menstruation period lasts at least 3 and at most 10 days. The flow less than 3 days (72 hours) or more than 10 days (240 hours) is not accepted as menstruation period. It is accepted to be due to an illness. In the menstruation period it is not a condition to have continuously bleeding. Sometimes the bleeding can stop. For example, if a woman has a three-day flowing then if the bleeding stops for two days and then if again the bleeding continues for three days; the menstruatin period of that woman is accepted 8 days. The two bloodless days in between these days is accepted as the menstruation period as well.
If it is produced or made by a haram (forbidden) matter such as pork, alcohol, etc it is not permissible to consume it. If it is not produced by a matter that Islam forbids, it is permissible. You need to search what it contains and by what it is produced.
Is it wrong of me if I dont wear jilbab when I go out?
The fatwa (a legal verdict given on a religious basis) on dressing for a woman is that a woman suppose to cover all over body apart from hands and face. A dress in order to be suitable for hijab (covering), a woman both must cover her private parts and wear a thick dress in order not to be transparent. If she wears a jeelbab (woman’s outdoor overgarment) on that dress willingly this is called taqwa (fear of Allah, piety). This kind of dressing is praiseworthy.
Fatwa is an obligatory act of religion. As for taqwa, it is a willingly and voluntarily act. There must not be any forcement on this kind of dressing for taqwa. Those who are interested in wearing jeelbab, voluntarily may prefer it. There must not be any insistence on those who do not want to wear jeelbab.
Can a non Muslim child of a Muslim get inheritance?
Only Muslim children of a died Muslim can be inheritor. However, even if there is a possibility to change the religion later, still when the Muslim person dies his/her Muslim children or wife get inheritance. But, when a Muslim person died, his/her non Muslim children never can be inheritor. It is possible for them to be inheritor by law. For this reason, it will be good for you to bequeath in order not to be given inheritance to them. Because they can be inheritor by law.
For further information please click on the link given below.
Marriage and talaq are very sensitive and important subjects. For this reason the matter changes according to intention and what is said by the teller. We see that the answers made by e mail are being understood wrongly and different comments are being held. In this respect, we do not approve to answer the matter of talaq by e mail.
We advice the brother who said this words to go to Mufti or Imam (official learned in Islamic law who is in charge of Islamic affairs for a province or district) and to tell the situation and to behave inaccordance with it.
The notion of adopting children and the tradition of integrating them into one's own family is an issue carried out throughout the history. This habit was especially more common in the Age of Darkness before Islam. Whoever wished would choose any person and take him/her into his/her family and declare that s/he took him/her as an adopted child. S/he would say to the child: “You are my child, I am an heir to you and you are an heir to me.” By this way, the adopted child used to be taken as his/her own child. As well as being a member of the family, s/he would also share the rights and duties of the family and would take the family's name. The one who adopted a child was taken as the father of that child. The wife of the foster father was seen as the mother of the child. The wife or the husband of the adopted child was accepted as the son- or daughter-in-law of the foster father; therefore if they, adopted child and his/her spouse, get divorced, it was not possible for the father to marry his daughter-in-law.
Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, had adopted Zayd bin Sabit. Zayd was sold as a slave at an early age and Hadica, the Prophet's first wife, bought him. She then presented him to the Prophet as a gift. Zayd was in the Prophet's service. Once, his father and uncle came to ask him back from the Prophet in exchange for money. The Prophet left the decision to Zayd. But Zayd preferred the Prophet to his father and uncle and chose to stay with him. From then on, the Prophet set him free. Addressing the crowd there the Prophet said: “Be witness! Zayd is my son; I am his heir and he is mine.” Thus, Zayd's father and uncle left pleased. From then on, Zayd was the Prophet's adopted son. Thereafter, he was called 'Zayd the son of Muhammad'. 1
When the rightful religion came, the habits of the Age of Darkness were changing one after another, the allowed ways were shown and superstitions and injustice were replaced by the essentials of justice. One of the habits of the Age of Darkness was the institution of adoption as was performed at that time.
God abolished this practice, which was against the human nature, with a clear command and by giving an example with the Prophet himself.
The meaning of the verse in this issue is as follows:
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your sons (in fact). Those are only expressions you utter with your mouths. Whereas God speaks the truth and He guides to the right way. Call them (the children you have adopted) after their (real) fathers: doing so is more equitable in the sight of God. If you do not know who their fathers are, then (they are) your brothers in religion and your protégés (so observe the duties of brotherhood between you and them). However, there is no blame on you because of the mistakes you may make unintentionally (in naming them), but what your hearts have premeditated (matters greatly). God is All-Forgiving, All-Compassionate.” (2)
With these two verses, the habit of adopting children was abolished. This unlawful habit was made forbidden. This is because with adoption it is possible to become neither a real son or daughter nor real parents.
The commands of God were revealed to the Prophet about this prohibition and about the decree that by saying “You are my son” no child could be taken as one's own. And it was also explained that the wife divorced by the adopted son could religiously be married by the foster father. 3
In Islam, because of the following drawbacks, adoption is forbidden. Firstly, in an unlawful way, somebody else's child is brought to the place of one's own child, and rather unjust and unnatural treatment arises. It is corrupting the human nature to accept somebody else's child as one's own. It means harming the lineage and causing the child's real parents to be forgotten.
Secondly, when this adopted child grows up, the points of privacy in the family will not be complied with. Such issues as the duty of hijab ( self-covering of the body for the purposes of modesty and dignity), the prohibition of looking at and touching the people of the opposite sex other than near relatives will not be paid attention by the family members. If the adopted child is male, he will be together with the other women in the family; if female, she will live together with the other men in the family. However, whether the child is male or female, just as the lady of the family is not her/his mother, the relatives of the family are not accepted as the relatives of the adopted child; they are no different than strangers. When they grow up, they will always be faced with the forbidden in the family.
Still another drawback is that the adopted child will share the property . Therefore, the nearer relatives will be partly or completely deprived of the inheritance. The relatives whose rights are violated will view the adopted child as an enemy. This is because in reality the adopted child does not have a right in the inheritance.
So, for all these reasons, Islam does not advise adopting children. However, aside from the issue of adoption mentioned above, it is a good act for somebody to protect his/her relative's or friend's child, or to care for a homeless child or for an orphan and to love him/her like his/her own child, to feed and educate him/her. But in this case, this person should not claim absolute ownership over the child, should not give him the rights of his/her own child and should pay attention to the issue of privacy (between men and women). However, if one wants, while alive, s/he can donate some part of his/her property to the adopted child, or s/he can bequeath some of her/his property to the child before s/he dies. Likewise, in many of his hadiths, the Prophet gave the good news of the paradise for the ones who care for orphans and for the children without anybody to care for them. 4
This issue has three important aspects:
1- Adoption is not allowed considering the possibility of staying alone together, because if the adopted child is female, she will not be mahram (within the forbidden limits; a close relative of the opposite gender who one can appear before without observing full self-covering and who one cannot marry) to the father, and if the adopted child is male, he will not be mahram to the mother. This problem can be solved by suckling, as the woman will then be a foster mother who suckles the child, and the man will be a foster father. There will be no religious obstacles then.
2- The foster parents may not show the mercy that the real parents would show. From this perspective, there is the responsibility for depriving the child of his/her real parents, and this is important on the child's part. However, there may not be such a danger for children without relatives.
3- The inheritance of the foster parents will be left to this child. However, this inheritance is supposed to be given to the relatives. Therefore, this means giving someone else's right to the adopted child, so this is not allowed. As a solution, asking for the forgiveness of the inheritors for any injustice that may have been done or legally depriving the adopted child of the inheritance can be done.
For these three reasons, we can say that adoption is not right. If we overcome these three obstacles from the religious perspective, with God willing, adoption will not be forbidden.
1. Usdu’l-Gâbe, 2: 225.
2. Al-Ahzab Surah,33:4-5.
3. Al-Ahzab Surah, 33:37.
4. Muslim, Zuhd: 42.
Is it right for an engaged couple to talk (about physical relations) before getting married so that they may ease out difficulty?
Affiance is not a marriage agreement, but it is a marriage promise. For this reason, those who engage are foreign to each other and they can not be together unless there is their mahrams (so closely related by blood that marriage with him/her is forbidden). For this reason, even if they are engaged, it is not permissible for them to be together, to look at the private parts of them which are forbidden and to touch each other. And they should pay attention to their speeches.
They have to be careful on some cases when the engaged couples talk to each other on the phone, msn etc...
For example, if they talk about love, gossip, lie, and about any thing that wakens the sexual desires etc... It is absolutely not true.
However, if it is about religious matters that reminds Allah, death, afterdeath and religious feelings and thoughts, certainly it cannot be said that it is forbidden. The criterion should be as mentioned. When you acct in those criterions, we can say that you do not commit sin and you protect yourselves. Also, we advise you to ask your conscience about what you do. If your conscience is not comfortable, give up what you do.
How and when should we supplicate? What are the most grateful supplications?
Man’s creation is suitable both for good deed and sin. So, he, time to time, may commit sin willingly or unwillingly. On this matter in the Qur’an it is said: “Allah forgives not that partners should be set up with Him; but He forgives anything else, to whom He pleases; to set up partners with Allah is to devise a sin most heinous indeed.” (An-Nisaa, 4/48-116). With these verses it is expressed that whatever sin committed may be forgiven except setting up partners with Allah.
In our books it is expressed that the repentance made with heart and soul will be accepted by Allah. Thus, Allah, the most Compassionate, with the verse “O you who believe! Turn to Allah with sincere repentance: in the hope that your Lord will remove from you your evil deeds and admit you to Gardens beneath which Rivers flow …” (At-Tahrim, 66-8) declares that the repentances made will be accepted. The sincere repentance mentioned in the verse is as follow:
1. Being aware of the committed sin before Allah and due to that sin, taking refuge in Him and feeling sorry.
2. Feeling sorry for the sin committed and conscientiously being uncomfortable because committing such a sin before the Creator.
3. Being in a determination of not committing such a sin any more.
4. If it is concerning with rightful share, forgiving each other.
In one Hadith Our Prophet said as follow: “Sincere repentance is this:
-Regretting for the sins.
-Performing obligatory worships.
-Not doing cruelty and hostility.
-Making peace with hurt and cross.
-Being in determination of not going back to sin any more.”
Inshaallah if these conditions are applied, we hope that Allah will accept our repentances.
However, man, every time, should be in a feeling between hope and fear. Neither we may rely on our worships, nor fall into despair due to our sins. As for it is wrong to say “I am very good, I managed that work.”, so too, saying that ‘Allah will not accept me’ is wrong at the same degree. How and when should we supplicate? What are the most grateful supplications?
Is the nikah (marriage) valid which is made under the effect of magic?
The nikah (marriage) is valid but some scholars do not agree on the subject that people can be forced to get married or to divorce under the effect of magic/black magic. They express that the black magic has no such effect. But if such a suspicion exists then it is permissible to eliminate it with lawful prayers or ways and one can consult the persons who are believed to do this better.
The verse come not near to fornication warns people not to try to commit acts that pave the way for fornication. By considering this, in what way should I tell this verse to my husband?
Islam is a religion that follows the middle way, away from extremes. Therefore, if we go to the extremes in our judgments, we will deviate from the truth and distress ourselves more than necessary.
First of all, visiting pornographic websites is not equal to fornication. Although different kinds of fornication like “the fornication of the eye, ear and hand” are mentioned in hadiths, they are not fornication in the real sense. If they were the same, the punishment for them would be the same as the punishment for fornication. The bitter expressions in the hadith aim to guide people because to look at haram with lust, to listen to obscene talks and to touch a woman deliberately with one’s hand are acts that lead to fornication.
The verse “come not near to fornication” warns people not to try to commit acts like that which pave the way for fornication.
Therefore, the judgment you will give about your husband should not be more severe than the judgment of Allah. To judge him with that imaginary crime of fornication and to ignore your duties towards him are not nice acts; on the contrary, they may make you responsible.
You need to act more flexibly in order to protect your husband from those ugly acts and to save your family life. You can sometimes tell him using sweet words to fear Allah if he is a person that performs prayers. You need to prove that you are not hostile to him, that you still love him and that what you are doing is for his goodness in order to be able to say it. It depends on maintaining your friendly attitude. His sin will not harm you if your intention is sincere. The fact that the wives of Hazrat Noah and Hazrat Lot were together with deniers confirms that what we say is true.
If he is a person that can tolerate the following sentences, it will be useful to remind him the following truths: “How will you stand in the presence of Allah after watching a pornographic film? Allah, whom you believe in, has control over everything (sees everything) with His infinite knowledge. Is it suitable for a married man to fall into a dirty pit like that? Woe on a husband that commit things that will make him lose his wife in the hereafter. A person who commits such ugly things does not have any respect for himself. A person who has no respect for himself has no right to expect respect from others. The Quran informs us that all of the concealed secrets will be disclosed on the Day of Judgment. If a large screen is opened and it shows the Gathering Place in the hereafter and if people and especially that person’s relatives, parents, children and friends see the ugly acts of that person, what will that person who believes in the hereafter do there? The only way to be protected from it is to repent and ask for forgiveness. A person may die any time and it will be too late when death comes; then, the last repentance will not do any good (it is no use crying over spilt milk)” How to tell him those sentences or who will tell him about them depends on your skill and foresight.
Majority of the Islamic scholars think that an engagement or a nikah without the consent of the engaged part is not valid, but some says if the nikah is solemnized with the consent of the parents it is valid.
We think that to solemnize a marriage without the consent of the engaged parts is not true especially if the parts are just baby while this marriage was solemnized.
Is it true to disturb and annoy someone just for fun?
It is forbidden to disturb not only Muslims but also non-Muslims. Therefore, it is a violation of Allah's and human's rights to disturb a Muslim lady out of fun and to injure her integrity and honor. Those who have done that should both repent and ask the injured person for forgiveness. Otherwise, in the Hereafter, the rightful will receive their dues rightfully:
Allah's Messenger (peace and blessings upon him) said: Do you know who is poor? They (the Companions of the Prophet) said: A poor man amongst us is one who has neither dirham with him nor wealth.
He (the Prophet) said: The poor of my Ummah (community) would be he who would come on the Day of Resurrection with prayers and fasts and Zakat but (he would find himself bankrupt on that day as he would have exhausted his funds of virtues) since he hurled abuses upon others, brought calumny against others and unlawfully consumed the wealth of others and shed the blood of others and beat others, and his virtues would be credited to the account of one (who suffered at his hand). And if his good deeds fall short to clear the account, then his sins would be entered in (his account) and he would be thrown in the Hell-Fire. (Muslim, Birr, 59)
In this case, a Muslim woman should possess the dignity and maturity fitting a Muslim lady; should not cast doubt with her behaviors, actions and posture; and if need be, she should notify the authorities.
Which Surahs and Durood's can be recited during menstruation period??
Since women are regarded to be junub in the periods of menstruation and puerperum, it is not regarded permissible for them to touch the Quran, to read the Quran by heart or by looking at it in Hanafi and Shafii sects. However, they can read basmala, and the verses that have the meaning of dhikr and supplication with the intention of dhikr and supplication without having the intention of reading the Quran. If it is necessary, they can teach it to others by reading it letter by letter or syllable by syllable.
Accordingly, women can read “ayat-ul kursi”, al-Fatiha and al-Ikhlas with the intention of supplication and dhikr in the periods of menstruation and puerperum.
In Maliki and Hanbali sects, it is regarded permissible for women to read the Quran by heart or by looking at it but without touching it in the periods of menstruation and puerperum.
Accordingly, women learning or memorizing the Quran in the periods of menstruation and puerperum can read the Quran and teach it to others by imitating Maliki and Hanbali sects. When there is an obligation, it is permissible for them to touch the Quran.
However, it is better not to read the Quran for the women who are not students with the intention of worshipping.
Is it permissible for me to make nikah with a woman who escaped from family violence?
According to your situation you can make nikah.
According to Hanefi sect, a woman who is in her adolescence can marry without the permission of her parents. But according to Shafii sect, even if the woman is in her adolescence, getting permission from father is necessary before marriage. If she belongs to Shafii sect, you can get permission from her father and then get marry.
Is sexual intercourse with one's spouse regarded as worshipping?
Islam is a natural religion that is suitable for human nature. Therefore, it encourages believers to get married. Thanks to marriage, sexual desires are satisfied, chastity is protected and human generation goes on.
A person's sexual intercourse with his/her spouse is regarded as worshipping. For, it protects a person from haram (forbidden) intercourse and enables human generation to continue.
It is stated in a hadith that when a man has a sexual intercourse with his wife, he will get the reward of sadaqah. The Prophet stated the following:
"When one of you has a sexual intercourse with his wife, he receives the reward of sadaqah."
They said, "O Messenger of Allah! Will he still receive the reward when he satisfies his lust?" He answered:
“Would it not be haram if he satisfied his lust through haram ways? When he satisfies his lust through halal (legitimate) ways, he will receive rewards.” (see Abu Dawud, Salatu't-Tatawwu' 12; Adab 159-160; Musnad, V/167, 168)
I started to be dressed in tasattur/hijab but I cannot put up with it. I cannot be happy; I am being alienated from the religion. What should I do?
Hijab is the way of dressing that is appropriate for the nature of women. A woman who is mentally healthy and who can think truly should be happy and tranquil in hijab. If you feel the opposite, it means there are problems with something else.
Firstly, you should be careful about the environmental factors. If there are no conscious women who wear hijab around you, you might be affected from the women who do not wear hijab. You should talk to religious women and chat with them. Religious talks and religious friends will strengthen you spiritually.
Get rid of your ephemeral desires. You should always remember the purpose of your creation and your lofty targets.
Satan will definitely pester a woman who has just started to wear hijab. Ignore the delusions coming from Satan.
Satan approaches man when he is in deathbed, experiencing hard times due to the trouble of death and says to him, "Deny Allah and you will get rid of this trouble." Thus, he wants man to leave this world without belief. As a matter of fact, man will not get rid of his trouble when he denies Allah; on the contrary, he will fall into bigger and eternal trouble; he will go to Hell along with Satan, in whom he takes refuge.
Satan does not do it only in deathbed; he does the same thing in the course of life. You die in the same way as you live. Therefore, Satan paves the way when you are healthy in life in order to apply his sly plan in deathbed.
He addresses you as follows: "Take off your hijab and see how peaceful you will be; your trouble will end." It is just like the statement he utters when you are in deathbed. The end of a person who takes refuge in Satan will not be good.
Can I be treated by a non-Muslim (Christian, Jew) doctor whether male or female?
There are various definitions of darurah (obligation); we will quote some of them:
a) To fear that one will die or that he will lose an organ.
b) It is a darurah to fear death, a severe illness or an increase or prolongation in the illness or not being able to catch up with friends. In such cases, what is haram becomes halal for a person in order to save himself. (Mughnil-Muhtaj. IV/306)
Accordingly, it is a darurah to have a child. For, if the genitals of a person, which are very important, become disabled and if it is possible to have a child by curing them, this becomes the most important darurah after death. (Halil GÜNENÇ, Günümüz Meselelerine Fetvalar II/159)
When a darurah is in question and an obligation exists, what is normally haram and objectionable becomes permissible and legitimate. It is regarded permissible to eat pork and to drink wine so little as to enable a person to survive. Darurah of treatment is like that too. For instance, it is not normally permissible for a man to look at the body of a non-mahram woman except her hands and face, but he can look at even the most private parts of a woman with the purpose of examination, treatment and diagnosis. It is permissible only as much as it is necessary and during the period of examination and treatment.
It is possible to view your question within this framework. If a woman sees a female doctor for the issue asked in the question or another issue and if she cannot be cured by her, the darurah to see a male doctor will occur. This can sometimes necessitate seeing a group of doctors in addition to a male doctor. In that case, if the diagnosis of one doctor is not enough, examination by a group of doctors will be a darurah.
If a woman cannot be treated by a female doctor related to having a child, it can be regarded as a darurah to be treated by a male doctor. (Mehmed Paksu, Aileye Özel Fetvalar)
Accordingly, if there is a female specialist, she has to see her. If not, she can see a male doctor and be treated by him. Similarly, a man sees a male specialist and is treated by him. If there is no male specialist, he can see a female doctor.
However, we should admit that the boundaries of this issue are not determined clearly in fiqh books. Therefore, if there is a male and a female doctor for a disease and if the male doctor is more skilled, it means there is a reason for the woman to see that male doctor; we do not know about any view preventing the woman from seeing the male doctor. We do not know any statements preventing a woman who is poor from seeing a male doctor working in a public clinic or hospital though there is a private female doctor that she can see by paying a fee or preventing a man who is poor from seeing a female doctor under the same circumstances.
All kinds of things and operations related to treatment like dental health, x-ray, ultrasound, analysis and test are regarded as examination and treatment except for esthetic operations. The same thing is valid for those treatments. The doctor does not have to be a Muslim.
All of those issues seem to be left to the understanding and taqwa of people by the shari’ (imposer of shari’ah). We can clarify this as follows: A person who says the issue is an issue of treatment and is treated by a person of the opposite gender might not have committed a sin but it may cause a person to commit something wrong one day if he/she does not make any efforts in order to look for a doctor of his/her own gender and look for a cautious method.
On the other hand, a person who acts cautiously, tries to be treated by a doctor of the same gender in a way that will not harm his/her health and tries to avoid doubtful things will receive a thawab of worshipping due to this effort. Besides, such efforts will ease the systematization and institutionalization of this thought, making such people gain thawabs. (see Muhammad al-Khatib ash-Shirbini, Mughnil-Muhtaj, I/35)