Are there any harmful aspects for a woman to work in a place where women and men work together? Should the woman obey her husband or parents regarding the issue?

The Details of the Question

- My wife’s family say to her, "We sent you to schools and enabled you to have a good education; if you do not work, we will not forgive you." I do not want her to work. My wife is depressed by this pressure of her family.

- Will my wife be held responsible if her family does not forgive her because of obeying me?

- Teachers can work by covering their heads at schools now but I do not regard it appropriate for her to work in places where there are non-mahram men. Besides my wife’s family are really obsessed with my wife’s working. I want to answer them with the Quran or hadiths; will you help me regarding the issue?

The Answer

Dear Brother / Sister,

A woman is subject to her husband. She will not be held responsible if her parents say, "We will not forgive you."

The Quran states the following:

 "Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty." (an-Nur, 24/30)

Similarly, women are warned as follows:

"And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof." (an-Nur, 24/31)

Those verses are mentioned after the verses of asking for permission to enter a house. Ayni attracts attention to this fact in Bukhari's explanation and states the following: the real purpose of this verse being mentioned after the verses of asking for permission to enter a house is to make the owner of the house prevent the women in the house from being seen by the non-mahram visitors. (Ayni, Umdatul-Qari. 22. 231)

Bukhari mentions the following verse after the interpretation of the verses in question:

"(Allah) knows of (the tricks) that deceive with the eyes, and all that the hearts (of men) conceal." (al-Mu'min, 40/19)

Ibn Abbas makes the following explanation while interpreting this verse: The one that deceives with the eyes is a person sitting in an assembly who looks at a beautiful woman when she passes by or who looks at a beautiful woman secretly in the house where he is a guest. When the people there look at him, he stops glancing. However, Allah knows that this person will try to commit a sin with that woman if he can (Ayni, Umdatul-Qari, 22: 231, Tecrit Tercemesi, 12: 171)

The following statement of Badiuzzaman Said Nursi regarding the issue is so significant.

 "A beautiful woman entering a gathering of brothers, arouses veins of hypocrisy, rivalry, envy, and selfishness." (Sözler, p. 678)

Although looking does not make a person responsible as much as fornication does, believers are advised to avoid looking since it is a door leading to fornication. Abu Hurayra reports a hadith stating that man’s other organs also have a share from fornication and that they are included among minor sins. The Prophet (pbuh) said, 

"Verily Allah has fixed the very portion of fornication which a man will indulge in, and which he of necessity must commit. The fornication of the eye is the lustful look, and the fornication of the tongue is the licentious speech; the heart desires and yearns, which the parts may or may not put into effect." (Muslim, Qadar: 21; Bukhari, Istidhan: 12)

Those states are included in the category of metaphorical fornication; glance has lust and pleasure; if a person talks of and listens to illegitimate things, and if the soul has a strong desire, the field of responsibility widens. Since those sins are regarded as minor sins, they approach Allah’s forgiveness if they are repented unless they lead to fornication.

It is the safest way for women and men to sit separately and not to see each other unless there is a necessity since it can lead to unwanted states. (see Mehmet PAKSU, KADIN, EVLiLiK ve AiLE)

IKHTILAT: Intermingling of a few things. Intermingling of men and women; sitting and spending time together.

The religion of Islam does not approve of non-mahram men and women sitting and spending time together without measure; it always ordered a distance between them in social life; it ordered the relationships between them to be based on a certain measure and discipline because various bad deeds and even majors sins like fornication, which demolishes familial and social life, may occur from their intermingling. The religion of Islam prohibits bad deeds in principle, along with all deeds and attitudes that incite and lead to bad deeds as a preventive measure. Thus, it places a distance between man and bad deeds, blocking the ways to bad deeds.

 "Fear the mischief of women because the first mischief of Sons of Israel occurred due to women." (Muslim, Dhikr, 99)

The Prophet (pbuh) warned his ummah with the statement above, expressing that it was fornication of the eye and haram to look at non-mahram women (Bukhari, Isti'dhan 12); it prohibited a non-mahram man from being together with a non-mahram woman alone and a woman’s travelling alone without a mahram man. (Bukhari, Nikah, 111).

It is certain that when women and men sit together, haram glances will be inevitable. The following hadith is very remarkable in terms of determining its decree and criterion:  

"Umm Salama narrates: When I and Maymuna were with the Messenger of Allah (pbuh), Abdullah b. Umm Maktum came. This was after the command of hijab came. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said,

"Hide yourselves." Thereupon, I said, "O Messenger of Allah! Is he not blind? He cannot see and recognize us." The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said, "Are you two blind? Do you not see him?" (Tirmidhi, Adab, 63)

A great importance is attached to Friday prayer and congregational prayers in the mosque but the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) exempted women from those prayers in order to prevent the intermingling of men and women and stated that prayers performed at home were more virtuous for women. 

"The best mosques for women are their homes." (Ahmad b. Hanbal, VI, 297).

When Hz. Aisha saw that women and men intermingled in the Era of Umayyads, she said,

"If the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) had seen the women behave like this, he would have prevented them from going to mosque just like the women of Sons of Israel were prevented from going to mosque." (Bukhari, Adhan, 163).

There was a gate allocated to women in Masjid an-Nabawi. Hz. Umar prevented men from entering that gate during his caliphate to prevent intermingling.

The Prophet (pbuh) did not prevent women from going to mosque and he ordered them not to be prevented. (Bukhari, Adhan, 165). However, the women who came to the mosque did not intermingle with the men; they formed ranks behind the men. When the Prophet (pbuh) saluted at the end of the prayer, he would wait a bit before standing so that the women would not intermingle with the men; he would stand up after the women left and the men would stand up after him. (Bukhari, Adhan, 162)

Women went to the mosque for eid prayer but their place was separate. When the Prophet (pbuh) finished his sermon addressing the men, he would go to the women’s part and give advice to them. (Bukhari, I'dayn, 7)

Once the Prophet (pbuh) came out of the mosque and saw that the men and the women intermingled; thereupon, he addressed the women as follows:

"Move aside. You have no right to walk in the middle of the road. Thereupon, the women started to walk along the walls; their dresses were caught by the wall." (Abu Dawud, Adab, 179).

Uqba b. Amir narrates:  The Prophet (pbuh) said, "Never approach non-mahram women." A Companion from Ansar asked, 'O Messenger of Allah! What would you say about the relatives of the husband? The Prophet (pbuh) said, 'The relatives of the husband are death (that is, they are more dangerous).'(Ahmad b. Hanbal, IV, 149)

All these clearly show that mixed gatherings of the non-mahram men and women, and their sitting together are not in compliance with the spirit and character of Islam.  It cannot therefore be imagined that Divine Law which disallows the men and women to stand side by side for prayers in the sacred houses of Allah, would allow them to mix together freely in other places, gatherings and assemblies. (see Mawdudi Tafsiru Suratin-Nur, p. 141-176).

However, if there is no risk of mischief and if it is necessary, Islam regards it permissible for a woman to help non-mahram men and serve the non-mahram men that come to the house as a visitor. As a matter of fact, when the Companion Abu Usayd got married, he invited the Prophet and some of his friends but had not prepared anything to serve them. However, his wife Umm Usayd had wetted some dates in a stone container. When the Prophet finished eating, she made sherbet from them and served them to the Prophet (pbuh) and the guests. (Bukhari, Nikah, 77)

Rubayyi, the daughter of Muawwidh narrates: "We were in the company of the Prophet (pbuh) at war providing the wounded with water and treating them and bringing the martyrs to Madinah from the battlefield." (Bukhari, Jihad, 68)

It is necessary to be cautious and careful in the relationships between men and women in any case. We have very nice traditions like haram (women’s part) and selamlik (man’s part) in houses, which are in compliance with Islam; it is a sin and makes a Muslim responsible if he abandons the way of the Prophet (pbuh) and those traditions with the purpose of imitating the Western society.

(Abdülkerim ÜNALAN)

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