I am so tired of life; what should I do?

The Details of the Question

I have a constant feeling of exhaustion and boredom. This situation affects my prayers negatively. What could be the reason or reasons for them and what would you advise me to do as a solution?

The Answer

Dear Brother / Sister,

Unlike bodily disorders, the causes of spiritual distress may not be the same in everyone. They can be different for each person; it can vary from person to person.

For example, the cause of diseases such as diabetes, kidney failure and cancer can be the same or similar for everyone in general while boredom, “world-weariness” and depression, etc. can vary from person to person. For, any spiritual distress is closely related to the person's age, gender, profession, marital status, personality structure, education, financial condition, faith, childhood, traumatic events he underwent and family structure. 

In addition, whether this feeling, which you describe as "boredom" and "exhaustion”, occurs all the time or from time to time changes many things in terms of diagnosis.

Therefore, it is not possible to tell the exact cause of this state of boredom that you feel without knowing you closely. In this case, it is also difficult to give a specific prescription.

However, we will focus on possible general causes and suggestions for solutions to the feelings of boredom and exhaustion that people can sometimes feel. Insallah, it will be useful to you as well.

The main causes of boredom

By nature, man is a being equipped with very sensitive faculties and emotions.

Also “By nature man is extremely weak, yet everything touches him, and saddens and grieves him. Also he is utterly lacking in power, yet the calamities and enemies that afflict him are extremely numerous. Also he is extremely wanting, yet his needs are indeed many. Also he is lazy and incapable, yet life’s responsibilities are most burdensome. Also his humanity has connected him to the rest of the universe, yet the decline and disappearance of the things he loves and with which he is familiar continually pains him. Also his reason shows him exalted aims and lasting fruits, yet his hand is short, his life brief, his power slight, and his patience little.”

Thus, the struggle of a weak human being with the life of the world sometimes consumes his energy in terms of spirit and physique. The person feels emotionally and physically that he or she is experiencing a burnout syndrome; his or her interest in working, traveling and other blessings of life diminishes, and he or she loses his or her motivation.

Along with his weakness, man is also a very sensitive being.

Because of this sensitivity, man is very concerned with his environment and events; and this can cause him to feel spiritually tired and exhausted. People who are particularly sensitive and compassionate sometimes feel compelled to grapple with material and spiritual problems more than usual or try to help everyone's problems. During this process, they naturally become tired and exhausted.

In addition, man is a social being.

His creator coded him in a way to live with someone from the opposite gender in the community, to share life and every beauty together. Therefore, people who are single, divorced or separated, or those whose spouses have died may also experience boredom and inability to enjoy life.

For people who do not believe in Allah and the Day of Judgement or who have a weak faith, life and living are meaningless. For them, life has no meaning after a certain point of satisfaction.  Thus, life that is meaningless gives people boredom and exhaustion.

For these reasons and similar ones, if no solution to the problem of boredom and exhaustion is found, emotions become chronic and permanent. In this case, indifference to events, boredom and escaping from people begin. It also becomes difficult for a person to act to change their condition. The person who is in this mood becomes skeptical of himself and assumes attitudes and thoughts that will evaluate him negatively.

Remedies and solutions

For the solution, first of all, it is important for the person to make sense of the spiritual situation in a spiritual point of view and to look at life through a new perspective.

In addition, it is beneficial for him to be included in religious, cultural and social activities that will add meaning to his life as they add new excitements and color to life.

In addition, he or she needs to rest a bit and get rid of her responsibilities and spiritual burdens.

To give emotions and thoughts a suitable direction appropriate for creation and to eb able transforming the distress into an opportunity for the purpose of life

As long as it is not continuous, the state of boredom experienced in a certain period of life is actually something that can happen to everybody. For, a person has a very rich treasure of feelings but Allah has not limited these feelings. Since man is not a robot, he cannot fix his emotions. Besides, since he is in the world of testing, he can be blown to the left and right with the whispers of the soul and the devil.

Whatever the reason, when feelings are experienced at the extreme level, it can also cause a variety of spiritual problems by capturing the mind from time to time and enslaving the person. However, Allah has drawn the framework of being a peaceful person by introducing certain measures about how much to be happy and sad or to love, and to get angry for what. The way to achieve this is to train the feelings as He showed them and turn them into behavior in a nice way.

In the same way, man, who is created to maintain the moderate way in everything, finds peace by directing his thoughts and feelings in the face of events and phenomena that seem negative about him and his environment.

To do this, it is necessary to look at the misfortunes and troubles through the window of destiny. For, as the world is not unattended, the events that happen to man and his close environment are not the events that happen without wisdom, without reason, and by chance. The duty of a believer is to see the trace, mercy, affection, compassion and justice of fate behind the events and to show patience.

A calamity that happens to a person is to make him think and repent of his own mistake and sin, and to try to be closer to Allah, his Creator.

For this reason, even if some problems seemingly aggravate the burden of life, it is actually an opportunity to gain eternal life, to be closer to Him, and to gain his consent. For, in such times, the desire of man toward the pleasures and sins of the world decreases; thus, he remains in a purer state spiritually. That makes him close to Allah.

The story of Prophet Yunus (peace be upon him) is a good example of it. The people of Nineveh did not obey him and left him alone; those on the ship that he embarked regarded him as sinful and threw him into the sea, and the fish swallowed him. In other words, he was both abandoned, thrown and swallowed, just as the events swallow us in our lives, people leave us alone, and our soul throws us into the sea of sin. However, this event is also the salvation of Prophet Yunus (Jonah). He prayed to Allah with complete surrender because he felt his incapability, weakness and impotence. Allah accepted his prayer and took him to the shore safely, and gave mercy and faith to the hearts of the people of Nineveh and guided them.

As it is seen, although the story of Yunus seems like a distressing and boring event at first glance, it turns into beauties about him, leading to mercy and compassion. Our task is to make an effort to use this opportunity as a better occasion through prayers and taking refuge in Allah.

The remorse that is felt after sins and big mistakes should not turn into a punishment for the person.

Another point to note here is as follows:

People feel severely guilty when they commit a sin or make a big mistake. They want to relax their conscience by punishing themselves with the guidance of the subconscious. This punishment can sometimes be in the form of condemning themselves to unhappiness, sometimes in the form of turning away from the blessings of life.

In short, the boredom that one feels may also be a punishment that he or she has inflicted on himself or herself.

However, the punishment that the person will impose on himself will not cause his sin to be forgiven in any way because it is only Allah who forgives sins. The feeling of regret and conscientious discomfort given to man in the face of sins is an invitation sent by Allah to the servants, an invitation to be close to him and take refuge in Him. After seeing his own fault and deficiency related to sins and mistakes, that is, after taking some responsibility, looking at the share of fate for the rest and trying to be closer to Allah will comfort the person much better.

Carl Gustav Jung, who is a healthy and religious psychiatrist, says: “The happiest moments in my life are the moments of contact with my inner world.” That is, my penitence, my repentance and seeking refuge in Allah.

It is normal and perhaps good that the pleasures taken from worship are reduced at this stage.

It is normal that the pleasures taken from worship are reduced at this stage because there is a freezing of emotions here; they need time to open up and warm up.

In addition, it should not be forgotten that not takin pleasure from worship, even if it is spiritual, is more suitable for sincerity because the pleasures of worship serve as encouragement for the soul. Therefore, some Islamic scholars considered the pleasures taken from worship as risky.

The important thing is that you do not allow Satan to take advantage of this situation and to make you suffer from delusions. Indeed, some of the saints of Allah experienced the state of freezing of these feelings called “spiritual constipation” from time to time, and patiently sought refuge in Allah much more.

To make our life meaningful by thinking of the purpose of life and turning every situation we encounter into profit.

One reason that bothers modern man and makes him feel tired of life is that he cannot fully realize the meaning of life. According to him, the purpose of being in this world is only to enjoy the beauties and pleasures of world life. It makes no sense to live when the person cannot have them for various reasons because if he is here to enjoy and have fun, there is no point in living without them. This thought makes him feel tired of life.

What a believer has to do about it is to question the purpose of his life again.

This purpose is doing things that will gain man the consent of Allah and to strive to be a perfect person as the Qur'an shows. The state of boredom and exhaustion is a test suitable for this purpose and is an occasion to gain His consent.

If the person is fully aware of this purpose, no hardness in the world will break his enthusiasm; on the contrary, he will endeavor to earn his eternal life with greater effort.

Such a person knows that nothing he has done will be wasted, and he will receive the reward in the hereafter. When life becomes a field of the hereafter for him then, he will look for ways to turn every form into an opportunity and send more supplies to his or her hereafter.

That is when life, its misfortunes, beauties, in short, everything will be more meaningful. What is meaningful does not make people bored ...

In this context, if your work seems monotonous or boring, it is normal to give you boredom because they do not mean much to you. To overcome this, if it is not possible to change your job, it is possible to solve this problem with manual skills, new professions and occupations by participating in various personal development courses that will make sense to you.

Again, in this context, you can make your life even more meaningful by working with social aid organizations, helping students and the poor, giving people good and useful information, and focusing on your prayers.

When you turn back and look back on such a day, it will make you more peaceful to see your mortal life pass in a profitable way for the Hereafter.

During the day, do your best to have friendly chats and conversations with family members or friends. Chatting with close friends is among the things that relax the soul and gives dynamism.

Play sports. What people give up first when they are busy is sports whereas regular sports make it easier to deal with stress. Even when you take a short walk, you will immediately see the benefits; the next day your body will be more fit and your soul will relax.

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