How does our religion regard not getting married (remaining single)?

- How should the fact that some people and some Islamic scholars do not marry in this age be regarded?

Dear Brother / Sister,

In accordance with the state of those getting married, the decree of marriage falls into these categories: fard, wajib, sunnah, haram, makruh or mubah:

1. Fard: It is fard for the one who is certain to commit fornication if he does not marry to get married, on condition that he has the finances to give the dowry (mahr) and to provide livelihood for his wife.

2. Wajib: It is wajib for the man who is in danger of committing fornication if he does not marry on condition that he has the finances to provide mahr and livelihood for the wife. The majority except for Hanafis do not differentiate between fard and wajib. (Ibnul-Humam, Fathul-Qadir, II, 342; al-Qasani, al-Badayi', II, 260 et al)

3. Haram: It is haram for the one who is certain to oppress his spouse if he gets married to get married. For the one who fears both committing fornication and oppressing his spouse, the aspect of haram is preferred. For if halal and haram coexist in an issue, haram is regarded as more important as a principle and it must be avoided. as a matter of fact, the following is stated in a verse in the Quran:

“Let those who find not the wherewithal for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah gives them means out of His grace.” (an-Nur, 24:33)

4. Makruh: It is makruh for the one who is likely to oppress his spouse to get married. (al-Mawsili, al-Ikhtiyar, III, 82)

5. Sunnah: It is sunnah for those in moderate sexual state (’'tidal) to get married. I’tidal is the state of the one who does not have the risk of committing fornication if he does not get married, and who is not likely to oppress his spouse if he gets married. The majority of the community falls into this group. The hadiths mentioned above advising young people who cannot marry to fast, and warning the three Companions who decided to abstain from marriage, are the evidence for that.

On the other hand, the Prophet and the Companions got married and those following them continued that sunnah. That is the preferred view. (See al-Fatawal-Hindiyya, I, 267)

As for Imam Shafii, it is mubah (permissible) to marry in that case. It is permissible to marry or to remain single. According to him, dedicating one's time to worshiping and engaging in knowledge is superior to marriage. The evidences he bases his view on are as follows: God Almighty praised the Prophet Yahya (John) with these words:

“While he was standing in prayer in the chamber, the angels called unto him: "(Allah) doth give thee glad tidings of Yahya, witnessing the truth of a Word from Allah, and (be besides) noble, chaste, and a prophet,- of the (goodly) company of the righteous." (Aal-i Imran, 3:39)

The word 'hasur' (chaste) used in the original Arabic text of the verse refers to the person who does not engage in sexual intercourse with a woman although he has the potency. If marriage was superior to that, abandoning it would not be praised. However, the majority of scholars say that this example is a practice of former Shari’ah and that it is not binding upon the ummah of Islam.

Another evidence of Imam Shafii is this verse:

“...all others are lawful, provided ye seek (them in marriage) with gifts from your property,- desiring chastity, not lust, seeing that ye derive benefit from them, give them their dowers (at least) as prescribed...” (an-Nisa, 4:24)

That something is halal (lawful) means it is mubah (permissible) because those two words are synonyms. On the other hand, marriage provides sexual benefit for the married person. It is not wajib for somebody to perform something that is to his/her benefit. Thus, marriage is among the things that are mubah such as eating and drinking and shopping. (1)

There were those who did not marry among the prophets, e.g. the Prophet Jesus (Isa) and the Prophet John (Yahya). We see those who prefer not to marry among Islamic scholars such as Tabari, Nawawi, Sayyid Qutb, and Badiuzzaman Said Nursi.

It is possible to see a similar situation in ashab as-suffa, the boarding madrasah students of the Prophet (pbuh).

In Islam, it is generally discouraged to remain single. Rich Muslims should help those who cannot marry because of being poor. The only way for the man or woman who cannot marry to lead a life of chastity and for society to be protected in this regard is to marry.

As it is known the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) and his companions married and those who followed them continued this sunnah.

Allah states the following in this regard:

“Marry those among you who are single, or the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female: if they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace: for Allah encompasseth all, and he knoweth all things.”(2)

The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) attracted attention to it in many of his hadiths:

“Marriage is my Sunnah. Whoever does not follow this Sunnah of mine is not on my path. Get married! For I take pride in your multitude against other nations. Those who cannot marry should fast because fasting breaks the lust.”(3)

“O people of youth! Whoever among you can afford to marry should marry because that is the best protection of the eyes from haram and the best preservation of chastity. And whoever is unable to marry should continue fasting because fasting is a protection for him.”(4)

“Four things are among the sunnahs of the prophets: Modesty, wearing perfume, using miswak and getting married.”(5)

Marriage Competence:

- Puberty is not a condition for marriage to be valid. Accordingly, the marriage of minors is valid if it is performed by their guardians or proxies.
- The marriage contract of the mentally ill is also performed by their guardians.
- A person who is sane and has reached the age of puberty can marry without the permission of his guardian according to Hanafi madhhab. Similarly, a widow or a virgin woman can marry without the permission of her guardian.
- After a woman reaches the age of puberty, no one can force her to marry. When a girl reaches the age of puberty and her guardian asks for her permission, if she remains silent and does not answer or laughs, she is considered to have given her permission. The Messenger of Allah (pbuh) states the following regarding the issue:(5)

“The widow is more advanced than her guardian in marrying her off. A virgin is asked for permission, and her permission is silence.”(6)

Once, a virgin girl came to the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) and told him that her father was going to force her to marry against her will. Thereupon, the Prophet (pbuh) left her free to accept the marriage or not.(7)

Footnotes:

(1) az-Zuhayli, al Fiqhul-Islami wa Adillatuh, Damascus 1405/1985, VII / 33, 34; Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani, Buughul-Maram min Adillatil-Ahkam, Transl. Ahmed Davudoğlu, İstanbul 1967, II / 228 ff.; Hamdi Döndüren, Delilleriyle İslâm Hukuku, İstanbul 1983, pp. 183, 184; Ibn Abidin, V / 253; Madhahib al-Arba’a, V / 17.
(2) an-Nur, 24/32.
(3) Ibn Majah, Nikah 1.
(4) Bukhari, Nikah 2-3; Muslim, Nikah 1-3; Abu Dawud, Nikah 1; Tirmidhi, Nikah 1 Nasai, Nikah 3; Ibn Majah, Nikah 1.
(5) Tirmidhi, Nikah 1.
(6) Muslim, Nikah 66; Tirmidhi, Nikah 12; Abu Dawud, Nikah 26; Nasai, Nikah 31-32.
(7) Abu Dawud, Nikah 25.
(see Sadık AKKİRAZ, Evlilik ve Mahremiyetleri)

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