Can a woman sleep with her daughter?

Dear Brother / Sister,

At what age do children need to sleep in separate beds?

The statements of the Prophet (pbuh) determine the principle of this issue. Children are ordered to sleep in separate beds at the age of seven in some hadiths and at ten in other hadiths. 

Abu Rafi said the following hadith, after the name of Allah, was read on a page on the grip of the sword of the Prophet (pbuh) after his death:  

“Make boys and girls, and brothers and sisters of seven years old sleep in separate beds.”1

The following hadith with the same meaning is narrated in Mustadrak:

“When your children become seven years old, separate their beds.”2

In a hadith included in Daraqutni, this age limit is mentioned differently:

“When your children become ten years old, separate their beds.”3

Aliyyul-Qari makes the following explanation when he gives the decree “A boy is sent to a separate bed when he/she becomes seven years old.”:

“That is, he is moved away from the bed of his mother, sister and others. For, this age is the age of noticing the difference of women and others by the boy.”

Imam Nawawi states the following decrees while interpreting these hadiths:

“It is wajib to separate the beds of girls and boys when they get ten years old from their mother, father, sisters and brothers. It is not permissible for a man to sleep in the same bed with another man and a woman with another woman even if each of them sleeps at one end of the bed.”4

The pedagogues of today act more strictly and reduce the age of separating the beds to one year. However, the criteria of the Sunnah is always infallible and most appropriate.

Accordingly, it is necessary to separate the beds of boys and girls who are ten years old and to make them sleep in separate beds. Separating the beds of boys and girls is not enough; it is also necessary separate a girl from another girl and a boy from another boy and make them sleep in separate beds. There are numerous wisdoms and benefits of it.

Separation of the rooms of sisters and brothers is possible based on some conditions. It can bring about some drawbacks if girls sleep in the same room as their older brothers after they reach the age of ten. If the girl is younger than seven years old, she can sleep in the same bed.

Footnotes:

1 Jamul-Fawaid, 1: 139.
2 al-Mustadrak, 1: 201.
3 Sunanud-Daraqutni, 1: 230.
4 Fatawa an-Nawawi, p. 215a; İbranim Canan, Hz. Peygamberin Sünnetinde Terbiye, p. 309.

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