How can I cure self-complacency?

- How can I cure the self-complacency (ujb) in my heart, which is already quite bad?
- I cannot perceive sins; I feel sinless, I cannot find faults; I feel perfect.
- I am trying to cure it but feels like I will give up. What should I do?

Dear Brother / Sister,

Self-complacency is a disease of the heart that arises from an inner sense of conceit and superiority and can be cured when it is recognized and addressed. The solution to this problem requires both inner and behavioral effort.

Here are some steps that can help along the way:

Realizing Your Own Helplessness

One of the most effective ways to break self-complacency is to realize that man is both materially and spiritually helpless and poor.

The poverty of man is that he was created subject to infinite needs from the atom to the sun and in need of everything in the universe.

His helplessness is that he is too weak and powerless to meet his own needs. Although the needs of man have penetrated the entire universe and extended into eternity, he is too weak to provide even the simplest of those needs.

Seeking refuge in prayer and meditation with God Almighty, who is the Omnipotent and whose power is infinite, makes people feel their own helplessness and increases this awareness.

Trying to See One’s Mistakes and Sins

Sometimes human beings might not fully notice themselves and their actions. If you fail to recognize your mistakes and shortcomings, review your deeds and question them from a religious and moral point of view

Also ask yourself these questions:

“Do I have a behavior that bothers me?”

“If I were to ask people around me, what would be one thing they would see lacking in me?”

Attributing Goodness to Others

When you do good deeds, when you produce and accomplish something, remember that it is not only because of your efforts, but because of Allah’s help and grace. Remind yourself that without Allah’s help, you would not be able even to move a finger.

Practicing Humility

Consciously avoid praising yourself and feeling superior. Instead, try to notice the good qualities in others.

Get Support through Repentance and Prayer (Dua)

Ask Allah to purify you from conceit and arrogance by repenting. The following prayers can soften your heart:

Allahumma tahhir qalbi minal kibri wal ujbi war riya. (O Allah! Purify my heart from arrogance, conceit and vanity.)

O Lord! Make my nafs (soul) a friend to me and save me from being the enemy of my nafs.

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